Grey

Best 2023 Fantasy Baseball Team

February 16, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Draft Strategy, Featured | 66 Comments

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The best 2023 fantasy baseball team is a misnomer. Thankfully, none of us know what misnomer means. Sounds to me like someone tentatively wants to date the Travelocity Gnome’s daughter, “Miss Gnome, er, you wanna grab some boba and chill?” Miss Gnome brushes back her hair and bats her eyelashes that are almost as long as her two-and-half foot body, “I’d love to,” but her voice is high-pitched, which is a turnoff, so you cancel plans with her repeatedly until she gets the hint. Sorry, Miss Gnome, gotta ghost ya because I like my women’s voices low like their stature. Any hoo! So the title is hyperbole. What was I gonna say, “The Mostly Kinda Good Fantasy Baseball Team?” You’ll get over your scoffing; I have faith in you. This is the best 2023 fantasy baseball team that I can put together when drafting from my top 100 for 2023 fantasy baseball and top 500 for 2023 fantasy baseball. Honestly, I could draft another 25 teams from those lists, and they’d all be different, but equally terrific…Well, one of the twenty-five would only be sorta terrific, but it would be really hard to tell which one that is. If I took Matt Olson in the 3rd round, everything after would change. If I took Trea Turner in the 1st round, everything after would change. I’ve previously gone over my 2023 fantasy baseball draft prep for the first few rounds and pitchers pairings. For this exercise, I’m taking Yordan Alvarez in the first, because, well, people complained previously I always did this post by taking the first pick, so I’m switching it up, like when you combover your hair right instead of left. My “Best Fantasy Baseball Team” from last year is hilariously awful, and I’ll show you that team later in this post. Oh, it’s so so so so so so bad. I mean, it puts everything in question. Like, was I dropped on my head last preseason?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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See all of today’s starting lineups

# MLB Starting Lineups For Mon 8/4
ARI | ATL | BAL | BOS | CHC | CIN | CLE | COL | DET | HOU | KC | LAA | LAD | MIA | MIL | MIN | NYM | NYY | PHI | PIT | SD | SF | STL | TB | TEX | TOR | ATH | CHW | OAK | SEA | WSH
The Itch

Texas Rangers Top 10 Prospects for 2023 Fantasy Baseball

February 15, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Prospects, Featured | 22 Comments

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Money talks, and the Rangers have had a lot to say these past two winters. The timing was connected to their new stadium but nonetheless ideal for a system stocked with ready-soon contributors. 

Format: Position Player | Age on 4/1/23 | Highest Level Played | ETA

1. 3B Josh Jung | 25 | MLB | 2022

Happy birthday week to Josh, who turned 25 on February 12. Fantasy baseballers (Grey’s mom’s term) probably shouldn’t penalize players on their way back from injury, but Jung feels underrated in the wake of an abbreviated 2022. When Jung had surgery for a torn labrum around this time last year, I expected him to miss the whole season, so getting 49 games across two levels feels like a win. Jung was a shadow of his 2021 self that slashed .348/.436/.652 for 35 games in Triple-A. The difference was most notable in his plate skills. His walk rate dropped from 11.5 percent to 3.8 percent and his strikeout rate spiked from 17.2 to 28.3 percent. Shoulder injuries can permanently lower ceilings and even ruin careers, but Jung has the talent to overcome it. He’s a target for me in the CBS AL Only auction tomorrow night.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

2023 Fantasy Baseball Draft Prep, Pairings

February 15, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Draft Strategy, Featured | 98 Comments

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Here’s a post that’s gonna make you wanna slap ya mama and tell her Don Magic Juan sends his best. By the by, true story: I was once hired to write award show jokes for Don Magic Juan and he was so stoned I did nothing and he just laughed for two hours. Any hoo! The other day I told you how to draft your pitchers for 2023 fantasy baseball. I laid it out to you nice and simple (if you have a degree in “What The Hell Is Grey Talking About?” Not a PhD, mind you. Just a BS.) Today, we forget all that jabberwocky on the who-ha and get down to business old school-style (which means if you don’t comprehend, I will hit you over the head with a baseball bat signed by Joe Clark.) What I’m hoping to lay out to you is who do you draft 2nd, if you’ve drafted so and so first. For easy reference, the royal we will be using the top 10 for 2023 fantasy baseball, top 20 for 2023 fantasy baseball, and the beginning of the top 100 for 2023 fantasy baseball. I’m going to assume you’re in a 12 team, 5×5, MI, CI, 5 OF, 1 Utility, 1 Catcher league, similar to our Razzball Commenter Leagues. (Sign up for multiple leagues, and beat the heck out of your frenemies or make new frenemies!)  Anyway, here’s some pairings for the first two rounds of 2023 fantasy baseball drafts:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
MattTruss

Razzball Commenter Leagues: Why Join 2023

February 14, 2023 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball, Our Leagues, Razzball Commenter Leagues | 18 Comments

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Pitchers and catchers reported yesterday and the Razzball Commenter Leagues are open for business!  It’s beginning to feel a lot like baseball!  I can’t wait to be half as productive at work and start losing countless hours of sleep staying up to watch the end of the Marlins@Padres game, just in case there is a […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

2023 Fantasy Baseball Draft Prep, Pitchers’ Pairings

February 14, 2023 | fantasy baseball strategy, Featured | 76 Comments

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Here’s everyone’s favorite post delivered to you on Valentine’s Day so you can make love to it. I pardon your grotesque actions, and will allow a one-time hump-a-roo fest on your computer while this post is open on it. Go ahead. Hump-a-roo. Okay, done? Good, sicko! What, I never said I would have no judgments. Okay, did you ever think we’d get to the end of the 2023 fantasy baseball rankings? You did? Wow, you had more faith than me. Some time around the top 60 outfielders for 2023 fantasy baseball, I thought we were gonna have to pack it up and start ranking something else, like the top 20 Reasons Why We Weren’t Finishing The 2023 Fantasy Baseball Rankings. 1. Lazy. Then a new tier for 2. Winning the lottery. Never the hoo! Here we are now! So, from the 2023 fantasy baseball rankings, specifically the starter rankings, comes a need for this post:  The 2023 fantasy baseball pitchers’ pairing tool. This is where things get interesting! And by ‘interesting’ I mean massively confusing. If what you’re about to read were found scribbled in a notebook, the FBI would be watching me. If The Green River Killer stood up and read this at the next prison Meet N’ Greet, no one would blink an eye. Because, well, his company would prolly be all murderers too. Moving on!

For these pitcher pairings, I’m going to be using our (my) 2023 fantasy baseball rankings. Notably, the top 20 for 2023 fantasy baseball, the top 20 starters for 2023 fantasy baseball, top 40 starters for 2023, top 60 starters for 2023, the top 80 starters for 2023 and top 100 starters. You can also just get Rudy’s downloadable War Room by signing up for the Subscriptions. Okay, formalities out of the way. *rolls up sleeves, makes farting noise with hand under armpit, rolls down sleeve* Let’s get busy! Now, what is a pitcher pairing? It’s your plan for putting together a fantasy pitching staff. A course of action, of course — of acoursion, naturally. If you have A pitcher, which B, C, D, E and F pitcher goes with him? Which is different than ‘F this pitcher,’ that’s what you say by end of April after one of your starters gives up five earned in two-thirds of an inning. You should have six starters. The sixth starter is, well, Bailey Ober comes to mind. Or Hunter Brown. Justin Steele also comes to mind. Edward Cabrera anyone? By the by, I use this opening every year, except change the names, and last year the names I told you to grab with your 6th starter were Cristian Javier, Triston McKenzie, Tony Gonsolin and Bailey Ober. Not a bad track record and here’s Ober going around that track one more time! I’m going to assume you’re in a 12 team, 5×5 and some variation of 9 pitcher leagues like the Razzball Commenter Leagues, which are now in the process of filling up. Put on your pants and look presentable! Anyway, here’s pitcher pairings for pitching staffs for 2023 fantasy baseball drafts:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
everywhereblair

Top 100 Starters For 2023: Draft Rankings

February 13, 2023 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball, Top 100 Starting Pitchers | 38 Comments

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Gentlemen and ladies and enbies and everyone in-between, welcome to 2023 fantasy baseball! Usually, I’m semi-hilarious in these posts (at least according to my Mom’s Yelp review), but I figure this article is one of those “bookmark it”-types that you’ll load during your drafts. Quick! You’ve got 30 seconds to draft a player, and you just got sniped on Manny Pina. This draft is out of control! Put your hand on the wheel and drive into the sunset CowPlayer — I’ve got your next draft pick slotted up in this here bonanza of an article.

Here’s the outline of this article: 1) Why I’m the sugar to your ant colony, 2) Pitchers to draft in 2023, 3) Pitchers to avoid in 2023, 4) the whole dang list.

I value your time and your ability to use the search function in a timed-draft setting, so if you want to know more about specific pitchers, come back each week and read my updates throughout the pre-season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

2023 Razzball Commenter Leagues

February 13, 2023 | Featured, Our Leagues | 78 Comments

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It’s year 13 of the RCLs! That’s right, if the RCLs are in the bathroom, don’t knock, just give them like five minutes because they’re checking the price guide for their Semien condition, so to speak. RCLs are singing The Freshmen by the Verve Pipe. They grow up so fast, right? Soon, the RCLs are going to be dating, then fall for their high school sweetheart, then get married at 19, then quit school to support their young family. Then, an affair will start with their co-worker, and the RCLs will secretly despise their family when they turn 30 for depriving the RCLs of their lifelong dream of going to umpire school. Man, some serious RCLs’ bitterness incoming! Maybe you should just hit the lottery, RCLs, then you can spend all your money on a McMansion and a tiger tied to a tree. Unfortunately, the tree isn’t sturdy enough and bends all the way over allowing the tiger to break loose and stalk the RCLs into their bathroom where the RCLs wail, “I didn’t know how good I had it when I had no money and just the fun of playing in a free fantasy baseball league against 11 of my closet frenemies.” So, don’t make the same mistake as the RCLs, and live your best life by joining some free fantasy baseball leagues!

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Jeremy Brewer

Hitter Profiles: Buying Used

February 12, 2023 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Hitters | 2 Comments

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There is something about buying used.  Whether it is that pleather couch or your 90’s hatchback, you cannot go wrong.  In our fantasy baseball world, this simply means passing up the young shiny objects and buying those old rusty veterans.  Sure, we sometimes are fighting Father Time, but at least we know our lineup can drive stick shift.  This week we dig into those draft day values that might sneak through the cracks and be waiting around for the savy owner.  Let us dig into this week’s 2023 fantasy baseball hitter profiles!

Please, blog, may I have some more?