The Beat Grey Albright NFBC league filled up so quickly that the NFBC folks (you can still use promo code: Razzball25 and get $25 off at NFBC—sign up for a Draft Champions or Cutline Championship League today!) decided to create a second league where 14 unlucky fans got a chance to take on the Donkey who poops in Grey Albright’s backyard. So much has happened since this Donkey draft started on November 22nd and completed, 750 picks and 18 days later, on December 10th: Gerrit Cole signed with the evil empire for *pinkie to mouth* ONE BILLION DOLLARS, Anthony Rendon now calls Los Angeles or Anaheim or wherever home, the White Sox locked up prized prospect Luis Robert for six years, the Astros took cheating to whole new levels and I fell off my roof seven times while putting up and taking down Kwanzaa lights. Fortunately, the roof of my barn isn’t very high off the ground so I only stubbed a hoof. Anyway, here’s my NFBC Draft Champions errrr, draft recap:

C: Gary Sanchez (8/113)
C: Welington Castillo (40/593)
1B: Trey Mancini (9/128)
2B: Michael Chavis (18/263)
SS: Francisco Lindor (1/8)
3B: Vladimir Guerrero Jr. (4/53)
MI: Adalberto Mondesi (3/38)
CI: Danny Santana (11/158)
OF: Joey Gallo (5/68)
OF: Aristides Aquino (10/143)
OF: Byron Buxton (12/173)
OF: Trent Grisham (17/248)
OF: Avisail Garcia (20/293)
UTIL: Dee Gordon (19/278)
Bench: Miguel Andujar (21/308), Robinson Cano (23/338), Josh VanMeter (24/353), Teoscar Hernandez (26/383), Manny Pina (30/443), Jake Lamb (36/533), Jaylin Davis (37/548), Ty France (41/608), Monte Harrison (42/623), Dustin Garneau (46/683), Jake Cronenworth (50/743)

P: Walker Buehler (2/23)
P: Noah Syndergaard (6/83)
P: Shohei Ohtani (7/98)
P: Jose Leclerc (13/188)
P: Keone Kela (14/203)
P: Mike Foltynewicz (15/218)
P: Brendan McKay (16/233)
P: Daniel Hudson (22/323)
P: Pablo Lopez (25/368)
Bench: Jake Arrieta (27/398), Jordan Yamamoto (28/413), Jose Urena (29/428), Matt Strahm (31/458), Matt Shoemaker (32/473), Andres Munoz (33/488), Yusei Kikuchi (34/503), Sergio Romo (35/518), Jon Duplantier (38/563), Rich Hill (39/578), Arodys Vizcaino (43/638), Trevor Williams (44/653), Art Warren (45/668), Steven Brault (47/698), Ray Black (48/713), Alex Vesia (49/728)

YOU PROMISED TO GIVE AWAY A HIGHLY COVETED RazzSlam FAN SPOT TO WHOEVER EXECUTED YOUR FAVORITE DRAFT, STOP STALLING AND GIVE IT UP!

Settle down Al Caps, I was just getting there. There’s one draft that made my tail wag with excitement and jealousy: Mondongo aka Shawn Beck somehow found Gerrit Cole—ADP #6— fall into his lap at pick 13 and Jacob deGrom—ADP #9—smack him over the head at pick 18. Maybe that’s the Razzball starting pitcher fade in action since most participants hailed from RazzHall. I’m cool with fading starters but in a draft and hold league, such as NFBC Draft Champions, we don’t have the luxury of picking up the pitching flavor of the week off the wire so the elite SPs get a decent boost in value. I myself took advantage of the discount, snagging Walker Buehler—ADP #17—at pick 23.

On top of the prize money for the top 3 finishers in each league, NFBC Draft Champions is also an overall competition with a grand prize of $30,000 being awarded to the top team from across all 240 leagues (3,600 teams) at year’s end. There’s something to be said for a unique team build which will differentiate your team from the pack. And there’s a chance Mondongo has literally the only Cole/deGrom build in the entire 3,600 team contest.

Mr. Mondongo sealed his place as my favorite team with his 6th round selection of Luis Robert. It was a bold move at the time as Lou Bob’s ADP sat around 110 overall and our newly-minted-RazzSlam-participant jumped him all the way up to pick 78. I thought for sure I could land the White Sox super-prospect with my pick 83 and was thinking about gambling that he’d make it back to me at pick 98. Donkey Teeth and Lou Bob just weren’t meant to be together in this one. Cut to a month and a half later and Robert the Luis has signed a six year extension with the South Siders and seems primed to break camp with the big club; his stock will only continue to rise as March draws nearer.

If those three picks weren’t enough, Mondongo caught up on offense by adding Yordan Alvarez with pick 43, Giancarlo with pick 48, Laureano with pick 78 and then he even landed a stud closer in Roberto Osuna at pick 103. Known closers draw a natural premium in draft and hold where we aren’t able to add the surprise closers throughout the year and that premium is amplified in November with all the unknown.

There were several teams I liked a lot from this draft, but the sexiness of the Mondongo was just too much. Congrats Mr. Mondongo, and welcome to the inaugural RazzSlam!

WHEN YOU’RE DONE GUSHING ABOUT YOUR BOYFRIEND MONDONGO’S TEAM WILL YOU PLEASE EXPLAIN WHY YOU DRAFTED OHTANI IN A WEEKLY LEAGUE WHERE YOU’LL ONLY BE ABLE TO START HIM AS EITHER A PITCHER OR HITTER EACH WEEK.

Ohtani is special. I think people may have forgotten the flashes of brilliance we saw from him on the mound in early 2018, as only a 23 year old, in a new country. He’s now had two full seasons to acclimate to the U.S. baseball scene and by opening day he’ll be 18 months removed from Tommy John surgery. Ohtani’s also been throwing off a mound since this summer and will have the luxury of a full off season throwing program and a normal spring training regimen to get ready.

So what if the Angels bring out the kid gloves and limit him to 120 innings? Those might be 120 spectacular innings and when the Angels announce they’ll skip one of his starts I’ll have the luxury of slotting an elite five category bat into my offense. Heck, if my pitching pans out well, I might just use him on offense anyway. Pick 98 seems silly late for the upside he’s oozing. Keep doubting folks, you’ll wake up at Shotime.

OF COURSE YOU DRAFTED KIKUCHI.

Yes, I drank the Kikuchi Kool-Aid last year and yes, I had a bad trip. I’m sorry if you followed me into the abyss, I owe you one. Do you accept IOUs? Bitcoin Cash? Ah, well I’m good for it.

The Kooch is cheeeeap this year. For good reason!  Oh great, now random italicized voice is here too?! So I snagged Kikuchi at pick 503 because, well, why not? I don’t have lofty expectations this season but it wouldn’t be the first time I came early. I mean, the first time I drafted someone a year early. It’ll take some major changes in approach, but 170 innings of 4.00 ERA and 1.20 WHIP aren’t outside the realm of possibilities. Although that’s not saying much, pretty sure the realm of possibilities is infinite according to quantum physics.

IS THIS A NEW 5×4 CONTEST WITHOUT SAVES?

Speculating on saves in November is a fools errand if I’ve ever ran a fools errand. Which I have. Many times.

This early in draft season you might think it makes sense to snag a solid closer who allows you to bank some saves amidst all the closer uncertainty. But I did that in my early NFBCs last year with Blake Treinen, Edwin Diaz and Craig Kimbrel and now I cower in fear anytime a closer’s name is mentioned.

Truth be told, I was looking to take a shot on a solidified closer in this draft, but a shiny toy distracted me each time I considered one. There was a huge closer run in the 10th round—Rogers, Hendriks, Iglesias, Diaz, Jansen, Giles, Smith, Kimbrel—which I missed out on by taking Aristides Aquino with pick 143. But he’s soooo shiny!

I decided to zag, building my bullpen around several bubble gum wrappers, an over-ripened banana duct taped to a wall and a slew of tequila shots in the dark. Jose LeClerc might be the dude again in Texas, Kela could be the hombre in Pittsburgh and Daniel Hudson looked delightful for the Nats in the World Series. Munoz, Romo, Vizcaino, Warren, Black and Vesia all have varying degrees of upside. Long story short, you have to get lucky somewhere when you’re drafting 50 rounds in mid-November.

LIKE YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GETTING LUCKY.

Dang, low blow Al Caps. Low blow.

 
  1. Tom says:
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    Would it be fair to say you have some major BA downside especially in the OF?

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Very fair, a couple big anchors but also Lindor, Vlad and Mancini to bolster me. I ran the numbers during the draft using steamer projections and I wanna say they had me around .260 with that starting lineup…

  2. bigbear says:
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    Hitting: Trent Grisham could be interesting. Hoping his OBP gets him into the lead off spot. Trey’s solid value. Think your offense will revolve around Vlad taking the next step and Aquino actually being whichever the good one was in Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde.

    Onto pitching: Shoemaker and Hill… I see you like to live dangerously. I completely missed that you took Kucki until reading the write up! Do we need to set up an intervention? I liked Ohtani last year. Not sure the part-time pitching in a weekly league is the way to go.

    Welcome back to the barnyard!

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Yes, I love Grisham’s price-point right now and almost wrote a blurb about him but ended up going on too long about Mondongo. Love Vlad, might own him everywhere. Pretty sour about this Castellanos deal but hoping the Reds ship Winker off to free Aquino up a little.

      Shoemaker and Hill were practically free! I’m currently typing this from the rehab center, thank you for your support. Like I said in the article, keep doubting Ohtani!

      Great to be back, thanks for reading!

  3. Hater Bell

    Grey says:
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    Mondongo, huh? Always something dong with you

    • baby seal says:
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      Or something sausage, which surprisingly didn’t make an appearance today

      But we got a hoof reference!

      • Donkey Teeth

        Donkey Teeth says:
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        Grey banned me from using the word sausage late last year. It was sad.

        • baby seal says:
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          Brutal. But we’re on to 2020 now!

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Wow, can’t believe you have baby seal commenting and he’s all but ignored my posts!

            • baby seal says:
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              Holy shit, I’ve spent maybe 11 hours reading and taking notes on all of them hahahaha

              Don’t you worry, G! I’m sure you’re relieved not dealing w/ my manic commenting.

              Honestly, I’m just trying to catch up. :)

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                You best!

            • Donkey Teeth

              Donkey Teeth says:
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              Us animals stick together

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      True, it wasn’t really a fair contest with that name.

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        Haha

  4. baby seal says:
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    Of course you offer Bitcoin Cash for Kikuhci — both scams!!

    But for realz, the Kuch at that price and in this format totally makes sense.

    This will be the first year I’m dipping my toes in the NFBC waters. So thanks for posting!! Took some notes down, and will use that discount code.

    Time for a serious question. Do you think I can ask if they would buy some (real) Bitcoin with my deposits, and hold that in cold storage until my eventual 1st place overall? :)

    lates DT!

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Right? We had Asian expert Tim McLeod on the pod yesterday and discussed his thoughts on a Kikuchi bounceback…he was also cautiously optimistic. I mean at this price, why not?

      Good luck in the NFBCs, the drafts are a blast. Great way to kill two weeks while pissing your significant other off!

      • Donkey Teeth

        Donkey Teeth says:
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        Also, not sure when that pod will be out because my other Asian expert who’s actually Asian (B_Don) had some technical difficulties with the recording. If you’re interested in all the Asian talk I’d say keep an eye out for it next week.

        • baby seal says:
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          I’m highly skeptical that B_Don is actually Asian. Grey definitely juicing the diversity numbers here. Call Manfred, he wants his juice back.

          I saw a pod dropped recently, but haven’t got around to it yet. I’ll be sure to check it out! You guys should get Coolwhip to drop by one day. Love that Trout grin.

          Pod was “Goin’ Deep Podcast — Don Wan De La Roto”

          • Donkey Teeth

            Donkey Teeth says:
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            Good point, B_Don’s probably catfishing us all!

            The Tim McLeod Pod will go up tomorrow actually, technical difficulties were resolved.

      • baby seal says:
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        HAHA, my girlfriend has already had enough of me researching late each night for the last week. There’s still time to disappoint her, since I haven’t fully spilled the beans yet.

        Why not take the Kuch? Because pick 503 cannot be squandered. You save that for pick 668. I kid.

        Donkey, from one strange animal to another, you make sure to die on that hill if it’s the last thing you ever do here at Razzball. You could be viewed as a visionary genius–an Elon Musk, dare I say. Worst case scenario, people just think you’re a jackass.

        Thanks and good luck to you too!!

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          The Elon Musk of the fantasy world! My stock just keeps rising!

  5. Hernan says:
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    Over/Under, people that will Beat Donkey Teeth in “Beat Donkey Teeth” Draft Champions League set at 10…, taking the over!!!

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Love you too, Hernan!

      There will be a spot waiting for you in the Spring Beat Donkey Teeth NFBC League…better bring your A-game with all this trash talk.

      • Snacks Zillion says:
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        any room for Snacks Zillion?!

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Of course. Two spots reserved!

    • The Great Knoche says:
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      I’d say 11.

      • Dave D says:
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        Our league will be fun with you and Hernan. The real question will be which one of you will finish second? I’m not messing around with runner ip status again this year. Plan on leading start to finish in Greys league. Good luck Donkey. Your team seems decent. Good write-up!

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Thanks Dave! Take these fools down!

      • Donkey Teeth

        Donkey Teeth says:
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        Harsh Knoche

  6. Jolt In Flow says:
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    DT, you have an elite bat on your bench. And I don’t get the lack of love he’s receiving from draftees.

    Andujar has great potential in leading the AL in Average. Plus last time we saw him, the balls weren’t juiced.

    There’s no way NYY keeps him out of the regular lineup for very long. Dude’s got more muscle, a tiny bit more experience, and a lot of juiced balls since his last time around.

    IMHO, Andujar will be your MVP. Best of luck.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Hey Jolt,

      Not sure if he’ll be my MVP but pretty much agree with everything you’re saying, I couldn’t believe how late I got him.

      He comes into the season as UTIL only which I guess scares people off, but like you said, that shouldn’t last long.

      Thanks for reading!

  7. Djf says:
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    11 team keeper format (keep 10 for as long as you want, draft statts ar pick 111). Points league as in this article.

    I am keeping:
    1. Mike Trout – CF
    2. Pete Alonso – 1B
    3. Trevor Story – SS
    4. Yordan Alvarez- LF
    5. Vlad Guerrero, Jr. – 3B
    6. Giancarlo Stanton – Util
    7. Jose Abreu – Util
    8. Stephen Strasburg – SP
    9. Luis Severino – SP

    For the last spot, deciding between Jesus Luzardo, Gary Sanchez and Gavin Lux. Thoughts? Thx.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      This article is actually a 5×5 roto league, just to be clear.

      I’d go Lux with that last spot, he has the potential to be a top 20 player heading into next year.

      No problem!

      • Jolt In Flow says:
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        Without cheating (by looking at DT’s comment before making my choice), I decided on Lux as well. Glad to see I was on par with DT.

        *One note for me. Strasberg had a monster year last year. Chances of repeating? Who knows. His health held up last year. But he hasn’t had back to back healthy years in his career. Looking from the outside in, maybe making a giant trade with Strasberg + Alonso for an elite arm + prospect that will stay healthy might be the way to go. Then keep Luzardo instead.

        This is just looking from the outside with no attachments. Not sure I could do it if I was in your shoes and attached to the team emotionally.

        Good luck!

  8. baby seal says:
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    Donkey!

    Getting: “Invalid promo code” when I enter it.

    Going to ask the admins there what’s up. Just wanted to let you know too in case you could offer any help.

    Thanks!

    • baby seal says:
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      Fwiw, I’m entering it on the $150 DC 3-pack. Not sure what the restrictions are, since they already give a $25 discount on this package…

  9. John says:
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    How can I get into the spring draft? When (other than the Sping) is it??

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