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Please see our player page for David Bote to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

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This weekend Wander Franco hit the IL, and will see a doctor on Monday for his wrist and hamate bone and I want to die. Put me in a grave, shovel dirt on my head, and say your farewells. To be less histrionic and more just that down-home Grey that you’ve come to know and love, I want my woobie! Here’s Kenneth Cashman, the man behind Rotowear, mocking me:

Okay, Wander Franco was barely a top 250th overall player this year on the Player Rater, so, while I expected more, if you’ve survived this long with (aka without) him, you’ll be fine moving forward. I have faith in youse, my large adult sons, and five adult daughters. Taking his place will be Jonathan Aranda, who was recalled. I will say this about Rays prospects, they roll right off the fingertips. Aranadaadadadadadadada, McClanahananananananananananan…Though Lowe’s a hard stop. Aranada was tearing up Triple-A. Hey, kinda like Brujan! And Josh Lowe! And literally every Rays prospect who comes up and fizzles. Aranda is a decent power guy with a solid hit tool. Think a young France. Call him Tintin. In most leagues, you can prolly find better guys on waivers. Now, get lost while I try to cure my Wander lust. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Ian Anderson (2 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 5.31) pitches like Jethro Tull singing, “Hello, darkness, my old friend.” Uh-oh, we’re being visited by Comatose Since March Man. This is gonna be brutal. Hey, Comatose Since March Man, how ya feeling? “Great, man! You ever sleep for four months? That’s what I feel like! Anyway, let’s talk about my fantasy baseball team! Ian Anderson is building on his 2021 season and is now an ace, right? Right?! Why are you tiptoeing backwards?” Seriously, though, how long until the Braves put Ian Anderson out to pasture with Touki, Ynoa and every other pitcher who they have that’s good for one season? Soon! Okay, the highlights, not the lowlights:  Nick Castellanos (2-for-4, 3 RBIs) hit his 8th homer. “Hey, we could just put the car in neutral and roll it off a cliff with him in the driver’s seat–Whoa! Hold on! He moved! Castellanos is alive!” This was Castellanos’s first, and only as it turned out, homer in June, and he was hitting .212 entering yesterday’s game with five runs. Apizzarently, he’s become the Greek God of Hardly Any Contact. Then, Kyle Schwarber (1-for-4, 3 RBIs) said farewell to June with his 23rd homer. Someone please Back to the Future Schwarber with a Walkman in the middle of the night and tell him June is another 60 days long. Next up, or I should say nextus is Rhysus, the Philly savior, (1-for-3, 2 runs) hit his 15th and 2nd in as many games. Finally, the one true DH on a team filled with them, Darick Hall (2-for-5, 3 RBIs) got his 1st and 2nd homer on his first and second hits. When the Philly and Yacht Rock legend, Darick Hall, hits a homer, they better be playing She’s Gone. He will be in this afternoon’s Buy column, and he’s solid for power, but I’m not sure how much else. Sorry, Charlie, for the imposition… Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Is this heaven? I don’t know about you guys but I can’t stop thinking about that corn field game! Sweet sassy molassy! It was a-maize-ing! Never before was there a concept I thought was so stupid initially but I could not be more into when it was happening. Who would have thought watching home runs sailing into fields of corn would be so darn fun? Most surprising was not how much I enjoyed it but how much the players seemed to be enjoying it as well. I’ll admit Field of Dreams the film is “a bit much” for me but damn if I didn’t get goosies when the players walked out onto the field. What is wrong with me? I hate how much I loved it. Makes you realize how important the stadiums really are to the sport and I hope they do more stuff like this. Who wouldn’t want to watch the pros play on a recreated “Sandlot”, complete with large, scary, barking dog beyond the outfield fence. It put me in such a good mood I had to highlight a catcher this week, because I know you guys love that stuff. Well, Braves catcher Travis d’Arnaud returned from a lengthy stint on the 60 day IL this week and has picked up right where he left off after his breakout 2020. He went 2-for-4 Friday night with his third home run. D’ude is a d’Arnatural! Travis was just 4-for-17 with two runs, an RBI and two walks in his stint at AAA rehabbing after thumb surgery but showed plenty of magic with Atlanta last year slashing .321/.386/.533 with 9 bombs and 34 RBI in 44 games. He was a top five catcher last year and COVID survivor, Grey told you to BUY and he said, “Do I like The French Terminator better than the aforementioned catchers? Not really.” Wow! High praise! D’Arnaud is available in about half of leagues right now but that number is climbing fast. I’d grab him wherever I needed a catcher.

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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On Saturday, Marcell Ozuna was arrested for domestic violence. Proving this year, he’s a piece of shit on and off the field. There’s no way he plays again this year. Too bad he’ll miss Player’s Nickname weekend, when they could’ve put on his uniform back, “I’m A Garbage Human.” My guess is Ozuna’s suspension goes into next year too; the Braves void his contract, and he’s playing the outfield somewhere with Puig. By ‘somewhere’ I mean not in the MLB, as he rightfully becomes Ozuna non-grata. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Yesterday, James Kaprielian went 7 IP, 0 ER, 2 hits, 2 walks, 4 Ks, ERA at 1.53, and it’s time to dig in. Luckily, I watched him since it was an afternoon game. Looks like his sum is greater than his parts. Like a Honda. Ya know, no one ever talks about parts being better than a whole, which is always more likely. Like Tenet. Like The Irishman. Like a seven-course dinner anywhere. Amuse bouche? I’ll amuse you! Apps? Perhaps! Entree? Entry into my mouth! Cheese course? Okay, eff off. Mid-dinner sorbet to cleanse my palate? No, just bring me the damn dessert! So, Kaprielian appears to have a home run problem, but the Colossal-seum will help with that, and facing the M’s didn’t hurt. The command will be low 3-ish BB/9 with a 8.7-9.1 K/9. That’s roughly a high-3 to low 4 ERA with neutral luck, and a Streamonator call. Whispers softly, “He’s a mediOAKer starter.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Wade Miley had it going on Friday night in Cleveland pitching his first career no-hitter allowing just one walk and base runner reaching on an error while striking out eight batters for his fourth win of the year. Wait–he did what? Spit Take! It was just his second complete game shutout in ever, that’s right folks, in ever. In over 250 starts, Miley had only completed nine innings once before, back in April 2016 against the Royals. OK, so that seems normal. Miley joins Joe Musgrove, Carlos Rodon, and John Means for the fourth no-hitter this year and it’s only May (and we’re not even counting Madison Bumgarner’s 7-inning no-no)! Yep, that also seems totally normal. Certainly nothing wrong with the abysmal offenses on a lot of MLB clubs right now. And let’s not forget to mention this was the second time the Cleveland Baseball Team has been no-hit this season. I know pitchers tend to have the advantage earlier in the year, while batters heat up when the weather gets hot, hot, hot–but this seems a little silly, no? Not that I’m complaining. After refusing to draft a starting pitching until the 8th round, I now have fantasy teams that roster several pitchers with no-hitters this season. NBD #humblebrag. Wade’s been more than serviceable this year rocking a 2.00 ERA, 0.75 WHIP, and 27/8 K/BB ratio but I can’t imagine any stats I throw at you are going to make you add this guy. It’s Wade Miley! The bigger story here is how bad some of these offenses have been. As for Miley, he remains a streamer in most leagues but gets a juicy start with Pittsburgh next week. He’s playing for his seventh team in 10 years so it’s not unusual if you got some warm fuzzies from Miley’s big night. He’s a genuinely great clubhouse presence and you’ve likely rooted for him at some point in the past decade when he played for your own local baseball team. So Wade To Go Miley!

Here’s what else happened in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH OR $13/MONTH WITH AN EXTRA WEEKLY PODCAST.)

First, allow me to share a story, uh, shared by frequent commenter, Travis Hafner. The Pronk One:

So, do we think Harrison Bader is into Pikachu or Mankey? Polyps? More like Poliwag or Poliwhirl! “Do you mind if I call you Jigglypuff?” That’s Harrison Bader talking to Yadier Molina. Harrison Bader looks at a fruit basket and is like, “Does anyone want this Flapple or can I have it?” Is this all gibberish or am I actually saying real words or am I reading aloud while I edit a Pokemonpedia? Who’s to say! In that fantastic story from Travis Hafner that I want to make all about Pokemon is a little tidbit about how Bader had polyps in his nose which hurt his equilibrium and his hitting. Reminds me of the time I had collagen sucked out of my face because my card was declined and now they say I got po’ lips. Sad for me, but positive for Bader, because he had surgery and it’s fixed. That could legitimately help him take his game to the next level. He’s been hitting this week, and I would absolutely grab him. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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With a two singles and a double, the White Sox big hitting star yesterday was Dylan Cease. Saying after the game, “With Lou Bob going down like a deflated beanbag — No offense, Mitch Haniger — it’s important we all step up like an 80’s aerobics teacher,” then he began to count off exercise moves, “5, 6, 7, 8, schlemiel, schlimazel, let’s see you burn, boys!” Then he did some step aerobics out of the room. Obviously, he’s being modest, and way more anaerobic. It wasn’t just his hitting people were doing the swoon for — 6 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 3 walks, 11 Ks, ERA at 2.37, and now his last 13 innings have been shutout with 20 Ks. That makes me want to sing (Keep Feeling) Fascination by The Human League. We’re all in that. The Human League. I’m saying that’s all of us. I will rock your world though if you say anything bad about boba. Cease looks to be going to his 96 MPH 4-seam fastball more than ever in his career, paired with an 86 MPH slider that has a .174 xBA, which is just goofy for a pitch he’s throwing 30% of the time. Don’t want to be caught with my shorts around my ankles because I’m wearing a banana hammock, but Cease looks to be emerging as an ace. Not a fantasy number two or three, but a number one. I don’t say that lightly, though I am writing this with a feather and 100 monkeys are typing it up later–Let’s go, Ling-Ling! Type faster! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

What’s in a name? That which we call a closer by any other name would smell as sweet in any inning. We could be inching closer to all bullpens going completely by-committee. In the 473 games played so far – 60 different relievers have notched saves.

What other sport has a position for a player based solely on when they come into the game? There aren’t wide receivers who only play in the 2nd half. There aren’t goalies who only come onto the ice in the 3rd period. You play your best players when you need them most. 

I’m going to take a look at some of the low security/closer-by-committee teams and let you know who I think is the reliever I think could be in the closer conversation soon. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Fernando Tatis Jr. went down in a heap after a swing, and I fell off my couch, rolled three feet and laid there for twenty minutes until Ted, my dog, placed his butt on my face, the sign we mutually agreed on for “he needs to be walked.” Outside, we spotted two pigeons teaching a third how to fly again with broken wings. I stood by that hopeful scene signing Mr. Mister, “Take these broken wings…and learn to fly again, learn to live so free,” and I was briefly uplifted. Then, the branch they were perched on fell, and deposited all three in front of traffic. Feathers blew up in my face, triggering my allergies and I told Ted, “Let’s go home and sob under some blankets.” It’s impossible to know fully, until the Padres say one way or the other, but you’d have to think that Tatis only injures himself on a swing if he was playing hurt already. As of this writing, the Padres are saying a partial dislocation, which would mean weeks vs. months, and would be relatively good news. Also, if you can even think about next steps, I grabbed Jurickson Profar, and Jake Cronenworth and Ha-Seong Kim should see an increase in playing time. I await further news while securely under these blankets. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?