In the doubleheader, Nate Schierholtz went 6-for-10 with a homer, 2 runs, 3 RBIs, steal and back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back-etc. starts from Bochy, go ahead with your big head self!¬† “This is the year Schierholtz breaks out!¬† And fill up my Merlot!”¬† That’s every Giants fan for the last three years.¬† Then within a few weeks, he’s usually hurt.¬† If Schierholtz is indeed German for pantyhose, he sure gets rips in them quickly.¬† Maybe he should bathe in clear nail polish.¬† (See, ladies, Grey doesn’t forget about you.)¬† Schierholtz has power, he just needs to stay healthy.¬† For now, I’d pick him up in all leagues.¬† Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Tim Lincecum – Good news:¬† 5 IP, 1 ER, 8 Ks.¬† Bad news: 4 hits, 5 walks, 108 pitches.¬† Reminds me of my stat lines when playing backyard Wiffle Ball.¬† Maybe Timmy needs to throw to a Pitchback instead of a Posey.
Mike Gonzalez – Boras said Gonzalez is expected to sign with a club in the next ten days.¬† Boras better get a deal fast before the terrible closer bubble bursts.
Lorenzo Cain – Expected to come off the DL on Friday.¬† Make room in your fantasy cupboard for Cain…Sugar!
Josh Donaldson – After starting the year on a sub-.100 anti-tear, the A’s brushed him aside like the ABC makeup lady used to do to his grandfather’s hair.¬† He will be sorely missed by opposing pitchers, Fantasy Razzball managers, and frustrated owners in 2-catcher leagues who hoped he could outperform the Barajii of the league.
Adrian Beltre – Should return soon as the MRI showed his leg was normal.¬† Right above the foot and below the hip.
Josh Willingham – Out until Friday on maternity leave.¬† A lesson in the birds and the bees brought to you by Grey Albright:¬† Nine months ago there was a Drillingham with a throbbing lardon, asking to porker and now there’s a baby back.
Derek Holland – 6 IP, 7 ER, 13 baserunners, 1 K.¬† An embarrassment to pitchers and mustaches everywhere.
Josh Hamilton – 1-for-4 with his 8th homer as everyone who didn’t draft Hamilton continues to have their balloon Burrst.
Michael Bowden – The key piece in the Byrd trade is headed to the bullpen as predicted here first after reading it elsewhere.¬† He was a top pitching prospect once, but had a pedestrian K-rate as a starter in AAA so they turned him into a closer where he showed some signs of dominance (10+ K/9).¬† Nothing to see right now, but, if he has some early success and Marmol is traded (as I think he will be), Bowden could be saving games by the end of the year.
Cody Ross – 2 HRs yesterday and another one on Saturday (his last game).¬† Hot schmotato!
Daniel Bard – Shut the door yesterday in the 8th inning, but Bobby Valentine said that there’s no “great temptation” to have Bard stay in the bullpen.¬† In related news, Valentine is going for psychological testing.
Jake Peavy – 9 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks.¬† Now has an ERA of 1.88.¬† I told you to draft him in the preseason, I drafted him in the preseason and then I dropped him.¬† Why do you make me rue?¬† I don’t wish to rue.¬† I’m fine with no ruing.¬† I’m stirring butter and flour in my soul!
Alex Rios – 3-for-5, hitting .360 on the season and hitting about .500 over the last week.¬† Cust kayin’.
Chris Capuano – 7 IP, 1 ER, 10 baserunners, 5 Ks.¬† Is it the Year of the Cap?¬† Not probably, no.¬† But he could have end of the rotation appeal in mixed leagues and be one of those guys that’s cheap in NL-Only leagues that can really help you.
Michael Pineda – Headed for an MRI on Tuesday.¬† Here’s the Cliff Notes of a book I wrote (besides this one).¬† The name of this other book, “Signs of Trouble for Your Fantasy Starter.”¬† Chapter One:¬† If your starter is shut down and almost a month later they need an MRI, it’s not good.
Derek Jeter – 4-for-5, 2 runs, 1 RBI, batting .411.¬† So is he an Early Bird Special or a (Fill-in blank for term of older player who has a renaissance year.¬† Regarding that term that I asked for with Beltran last week.¬† I liked Ponce De Leon-g Balls, Hologram Tupac and Dead Cat Bounce, but Rudy nixed them.)?
Dillon Gee – 6 2/3 IP, 7 ER.¬† He alternated good start/bad start last year and he’s continuing this trend.¬† It’s pretty uncanny.¬† It’s like his job is to rope in and frustrate streamers and he takes his job very seriously.
Jason Bay – Left yesterday’s game with bruised ribs, which is nowhere near as delicious as braised ribs.
Hideki Matsui – Rumored to be signing a minor league deal with the Rays.¬† The Rays hope he still has a little left in the tank if they need a lefty DH.¬† Matsui just wants a job and heard good things about their potato chips.
Brandon Morrow – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 3 Ks.¬† Can we get Scooby on the Case of Morrow’s Missing Ks?¬† He only had 2 starts all last year of 3 Ks or less and he’s already had 3 starts this year like that and his other start was a 4 K effort.¬† His velocity didn’t look bad last night, but I’m starting to get concerned.¬† A guy who walks as many as he does (though he didn’t yesterday), isn’t very cute without Ks.
Krispie Young – Won’t return when his DL stint is up in 15 days.¬† With a ligament tear in his shoulder?¬† Really?¬† Here I thought a ligament tear was a good thing.¬† Just when you think you got the world figured out.¬† Wow.¬† File that in the surpriseapedia.
Wade Miley – 6 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 7 Ks vs. the Phillies (Just think, Phils fans, in another 25 years your team will be good again, not like the Red Sox who have to wait 80 years.), and Bauer’s call-up just took two steps back with this Miley effort.¬† The key word with Miley is serviceable.¬† That makes for good real world pitching and only matchups appeal in fantasy.
Justin Upton – 2-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBIs as he hit his first homer.¬† Formally document it:¬† In the nick of time, Justin.
Eric Hosmer – 1-for-4 with his 2nd homer in 3 games and 4th on the year.¬† He’s still hitting .203, but I bet he’s about to go on a tear and be hitting near .260 by this time next week.¬† Get it, Hosmer, get it!
Tony Campana – 1-for-1 with 2 steals.¬† He stole 2nd base so fast that he actually overran it, ran all the way around the globe, causing time to rewind, and allowing him to steal 2nd again.
Jason Motte – 2/3 IP, 2 ER and the blown save.¬† What a follower!¬† Ooh, all the cool closers are blowing games so he figured he would too.