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(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH.)
Leody Taveras reminds me of how Marshall Applewhite, the co-leader of the Heaven’s Gate cult, made everyone change their name so it ended with -ody. Too bad he had his entire cult leave behind their earth skins, like they were dry potato skins at TGIF’s that was lacking some sour cream, because Marshall Applewhite would be walking around right now gleefully, “Whody on First? Whatody on 2nd? I don’t knowody on third? Becausody is supposed to be in center, but Leody has replaced him.” That’s Marshall Applewhite, known Hale-Bopp comet and fantasy baseball lover. He called himself Bo and his co-leader called herself Peep (or vice versa, I don’t know), but it’s funny to think about the one guy in the cult who was prolly like, “Hey, uh, guys, Little Bo Peep is one character, and you’ve separated the names into two. It would be like two people renaming themselves Michael and Vincent after Jan-Michael Vincent.” Any hoo! Leody Taveras was a sleeper of mine last year; loved him because of his ability to hit for power and steal some bags, while having great contact, but that fish got flushed when he didn’t pan out. Hows’ever, Leody’s still only 23 years old, has 70-grade speed, surprising power, and he’s currently hitting. That’s right, he’s returned from the dead! (Like those Heaven’s Gate people anticipated.) Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:
BUY
Francisco Alvarez – Here’s a scenario for you: Mets trade for Jose Ramirez and send Francisco Alvarez, who immediately becomes the catcher, because: Why not? By the by, there’s going to be four teams competing for the playoffs, and another handful of teams that just happen to slide through. Parity, baby!
Nick Pratto – Royals’ Pratto sounds like a subset in OK! Magazine from pics snapped at Harrod’s. He hasn’t been playing every day, which hurts him, but I do like him if the playing time is ever there, and right now with the deadline trades, Pratto’s playing time is about to take a sudden bump. Oh, and Sal Perez is at 80% rostered, and should be at 100%. A little Buy I snuck in.
Jose Miranda – The best bat since the break? Hmm, Aaron Judge. Number two is Adolis, then Jeimer, well, you can look at the 7-day Player Rater, but Miranda is doing well.
Seth Brown – He was out on paternity leave this week, but hitting well prior to that. Hitting really well nine months ago. Hey now!
Darin Ruf – Fun fact! His full name is “Who let the Darins out? Ruf!”
Ramon Urias – The goofiness of ESPN ownership numbers really shines through with the 2nd basemen. Andres Gimenez is rostered in 100% of RCLs and was under 50% at ESPN; he’s a top 10 2nd baseman on the year. Urias is narrowly missing being rostered in 100% of RCL leagues; on ESPN, he’s at 23%.
Nico Hoerner – Not sure why I find it so fascinating, but Hoerner’s at 35% rostered, and Segura at 62% says so much about ESPN’s ownership numbers. It kinda gives it all away, tee be aitch. As for Hoerner, he’s putting up numbers that are gonna sing to me like a siren this offseason. The Siren of Sleepers, by which I mean that super bizarre movie Sirens with Elle MacPherson that I used to watch with the sound off as a teenager.
Donovan Solano – Didja know Donovan didn’t want to tack a Junior onto his son’s name, so he named him, Minivan? Many people don’t know. Dot dot dot. He’s been hot.
Joey Wendle – Every year there’s one week that Wendle gets hot. Welcome to that week!
Bryson Stott – Head on over to the charity fundraiser, Stott’s Tots, and don’t be a Dunder head, because you miss 100% of the Stott’s you don’t take.
Jeimer Candelario – Recently, in the Detroit Free Press, Jeimer compared himself to LeBron, and you might be thinking, LeBronchitis, the French variant? No, LeBron James, and when I read that actual quote by Jeimer, I laughed very loudly. Also, I just gave you my Jeimer Canderlario fantasy, which is just me laughing at that absurd quote.
Alec Bohm – For such an in-your-face onomatopoeia of a last name, Bohm is not bombastic at all, but more of a singles/doubles hitter.
Ezequiel Duran – Kinda hate Globe Life Field. It’s a bottomless pit of warning track fly balls. Duran keeps going under the radar, but he’s got power, speed and won’t kill you on average, like that view, amiright?! Listen, I have to hold back some of the better Duran Duran puns if there’s gonna be three Durans in the majors.
Cavan Biggio – True, boring story alert! I go through each position and look to see who is hot, then list them in order from catcher to outfield, going around the horn. So, I saw Biggio hitting well on the 7-day Player Rater for 1B, 2B, 3B and OF, and for each position, I was like, “Meh, no one’s really picking him up, are they?” Finally, I relinquished, and listed him, but is anyone actually picking him up?
JJ Bleday – Already gave you my JJ Bleday fantasy. It was written while sliding down a fire pole to change into a new outfit.
Raimel Tapia – Mentioned this on the podcast the other day, I was on vacation during the break, and I saw Tapia had a huge game on Friday, and I couldn’t enjoy myself because I wasn’t sure if I had Tapia in my lineup. Totally normal vacation stuff! Nope, my brain isn’t polluted by fantasy baseball at all, why do you ask? Any hoo! Tapia was in my lineup and crisis averted, and only after ruining five hours on my Friday night.
Victor Robles – If he’s moved to the leadoff slot, but in a lineup where he’s the best hitter, has Robles’s value changed for the better, worse or stayed the same? Please show your work.
Kyle Lewis – If you’re wondering, I looked at Mitch Haniger too (he’s not hurt again, is he?), but he’s rostered in over 50% of leagues, so not eligible. What’s the Vegas odds that Haniger and Lewis will both be healthy at the same time? 50 to 1? Haniger and Lewis is a Vegas show where they come onto the stage and hurt themselves. “And for our next trick…Damn it, my hammy!”
Kyle Isbel – With Andrew Bronxintendi Benintradi’d, Isbel stands to gain playing time. So far, he’s done little with it, but he’s got Speed, Opportunity and Power. SOP that up, baby! I sound like I’m running a WeWork-type start-up. “Get up on your desks! Yes, even Martha! Someone help her out of her scooter and onto her desk. It’s SOP it up time!”
Reid Detmers – Kinda interested in him in general, but this is a Streamonator call, like the call it makes to its local soup kitchen.
Braxton Garrett – I’m very interested in Garrett, and this isn’t even a Streamonator call. “It says ‘A warm hug in every bowl.’ I can’t have the soup because it will rust my insides, but a hug sounds nice.”
Zach Jackson – Ya know things have gotten bad when you’re looking to handcuff an A’s closer, when the A’s themselves can’t even be bothered. A’s go around misquoting Ivan Drago, “If we win, we win.”
Josh Staumont – Here’s the thing, if a closer is traded, it’s likely because his team has no chance of winning, so the guy taking over isn’t exactly moving into the best situation. Scott Barlow gets traded and Staumont becomes the closer, and *places hand under armpit, makes farting noise*. Also, there’s a chance these handcuffs could move too. So, Barlow and Staumont move, who’s next up? Which is what is said as the Royals’ relievers take a number, and Matheny pulls a number from a hat.
Felix Bautista – Would be nice to see the Orioles try to get better, but that doesn’t seem to be in the cards. Did I just say Jorge Lopez will be relieving for the Cards? Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t.
Mychal Givens – Feels like the number one lock for getting saves in the coming days since David Robertson is all but guaranteed to be moved, and watch Wick get moved too. Shame Candlestick Park isn’t around anymore. Wick would’ve lit that place up!
SELL
Brandon Drury – Our DFS writer, The Great Knoche, mentioned the other day how Drury was only drafted in two of 1306 NFBC leagues. That’s crazy. Some of those leagues are 50 round jobbers. What insane value you got from the Rural-Juror this year, and all that is about to end! I kid. This Sell is a tiny bit of a limb like how Jose Altuve is precariously balanced. If Brandon Rural-Juror stays with the Reds or is traded to the Yankees, then his value doesn’t take a hit. If he goes to the Yankees, then they just need Joakim Soria to have the Judge, Drury and Mexicutioner. If he goes to the Dodgers, Rangers, Mariners, Mets, do I have to continue, Twins, Guardians, well, let’s just say there’s a lot of places Rural-Juror could go that deflates his value. Even the Yankees worry me a bit. Great park and lineup (similar to the Dodgers), but they might actually see the Rural-Juror as a platoon bat. They have just too many weapons. This is not to say I don’t suddenly think RJ will fall off, but trades to contenders don’t always help a player’s value. If he stays put in Cincy, then I think he’s likely fine. If the Reds don’t trade Rural-Juror though, then they might consider a frontal lobotomy. So, don’t trade the Rural-Juror for a free entry into a Dance Dance Revolution contest, but I would go to our Fantasy Baseball Trade Analyzer and explore options.