I am equating this one solely on one thing for the Cubbies… and that term is? Pseudo-intellectual. Joe Maddon does everything different and it’s gotta be the glasses. He makes everyone want, need or have to be involved in his bullpen. Basically, he is the united colors of Benetton of managers. His hydra approach at the bullpen is not only bothersome or troubling for the roster-bater in all of us, it’s damn near impossible to roster and guess which guy it will be today. The trio of Jason Motte, Hector Rondon, and Pedro Strop all seem to play the part of a closer, but get shuffled around like Joe is playing little game in his head. I get that some situations warrant certain match-ups, but sometimes it doesn’t make any sense to me. So for those of you that still care about the Cubs and their six save chances combined between all relievers in the last 14 days, I would roster Motte and Rondon equally, and if I had the space, I would roster Rafael Soriano and hold on tight. Soriano is going to come in like the new city slicker, with a shiny pair of aldo shoes and end up being the cat’s pajamas for about a minute in Maddon’s mind. Personally, rostering three guys to garner one stat is a crazy, crazy thing to get wrapped up into and is a waste. If you are rostering one non-closer reliever to help with ratios, where are you making this roster space up from? Nowhere is the answer, my friends. So stick to the straight and narrow for saves for now, don’t chase unless a clear situation opens it’s doors and gives out the good candy on Halloween. Stick around for some tidbits about the world of relief-dom…
- The Rays are back on the box again. Not selling newspapers or waxing poetic about the religious virtues of man, but for saves. I for one back the move as McGee is the LH that the Rays need at the back-end to mix it up with Jepsen, Gomes, and the ilk (who will soon have five relievers with 10 holds on the year).
- The wayward seamen of the Northwest, captained by the perpetually puzzling loyal Lloyd, seem to be drifting back to the S.S Rodney. Unbeknownst to them, Carson Smith is and should be more owned fantasy-wide. I put the ROS totals for the pair at: Smith 12 Rodney 8
- I am glad Mark Melancon is an avid reader and took what I said previously to heart. K-rate is up, above 9 for last three weeks and 1 save to boot. Dahli Smokey has a great ring to it.
- John Axford on family leave is troubling for someone who seemed to be a nice waiver wire darling. Kahnle, Hawk and Oberg are the adds in that order which leads me too this weeks sneaky guy to add.
- Sneaky reliever who doesn’t close (yet) of the week? Tommy Kahnle. Worth rostering for rates, K’s and the off chance that Ax is gone for awhile, Hawk can’t watch the nest for too long before getting arthritic. The Rockies also have a pretty nice schedule heading into the All Star break.
You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.
Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkeycorns.
These guys are the men that make the save market go round. They punch in, punch out. Have the job, no real threat to speak of, and are basically just there to collect great benny’s so they can take care of their crippled brother. Who is only really crippled because he is scared of the sun.
I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Carlos Marmol– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Castro in the head with a pick-off throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.