Please see our player page for David Robertson to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

It finally happened. A team decided to sign Craig Kimbrell! The MLB draft happened this week so the draft pick penalty has been lifted for signing a few marquee names like Kimbrell and Dallas Keuchel. The Chicago Cubs offered the most, since their payroll is jacked anyway. With the premiere of Dark Phoenix this weekend I’ve got a ranking of X-Men for the tiers.

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I don’t know if there’s a more frustrating pursuit than finding enough pitching in fantasy baseball. Usable middle relievers used to grow on trees. Now the good ones are picked and what’s left probably tastes sour. Nevertheless, we forge ahead trying to find a bandaid for our fantasy staffs where we can. In deeper leagues those won’t be brand name, rather bargain brand bandages. At least we’re far enough into the season that some early injuries have healed.

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Yesterday, the Indians called up Oscar Mercado, after a hilarious bit where they phoned their Triple-A team and asked to speak to Oscar and they were met with, “The Oscar Mercado called and said they’re out of you!”  The Indians have now cornered the mercado on Oscars like Meryl Streep.  Mercado has speed to burn. He is so fast he just ran into your room, mussed your hair and ran back out before you even had a chance to flinch, which is great because you’re secretly being filmed for the new Netflix game show, Flinch.  Mercado had one season in the minors with 50 steals.  I just became aroused like Lorenzo Lamas after he sees himself in the mirror.  Prospect Mike said of him, “Mercado came to Cleveland from St. Louis at last year’s trade deadline in a move that probably slipped under everybody’s radar. He had a crazy good season in Triple-A though, hitting .278 with eight homers and 37 steals.  Caveat:  Grey is dumb.”  What?  That’s not a caveat. I grabbed Mercado in a few leagues, because I could use steals, and, brucely, who doesn’t need steals?  Not to answer, but bat your eyelashes and look pretty. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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No ham sad-wiches at this Fiers fest!  Mike Fiers pitching a no-hitter with 6 Ks, ERA down to 5.48, and he only needed 131 pitches.  Previously, he threw a no-hitter in 2015 when he threw 135 pitches.  Man, pitchers really threw a whole lot more pitches back then in the mid-twenty-teens.  Way back when we still thought Game of Thrones was a good show and not a shill for Starbucks.  Way back in 2015 when we all got along outwardly and just simmered under the surface with our political differences.  What a time!  Of course, Mike Fiers was facing the Reds, and Fiers is red and *insert Spider-man pointing at himself jpg* and Ramon Laureano needed to rob Joey Votto of a home run, but…piece of cake.  As we knew all along, there’s nothing to Fiers except Fiers himself.  He was a streamer I strongly considered yesterday, because Fiers is the epitome of a Medi-OAKer pitcher, and he was at home facing a terrible team.  Sadly, the one thing that puts out Fiers is when you put your stream on him.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Apparently Blake Snell was moving some granite hoozawhatsit in his bathroom and dropped it on his toe. We’ve all been there — our partners buy some unnecessary piece of furniture and we’re tasked with building it, moving it around to and fro and end up being the ones sweaty and frustrated. And don’t get me started on throw pillows — their purpose is in their name — throw them on the floor before you go to sleep…please don’t share this with my wife. Anyway — reports are that Snell will only miss one start. Granted, it’s his own report, but still it’s only his little ring toe. Fill In: If you need one start, give good ol’ C.C. Sabathia (10.8%) a shot. His next start comes at home against the Royals who are 17th in OPS vs lefties. Sabathia looked sharp as heck in his first start against the White Sox (5 IP, 1 base runner, 3 Ks.)

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Christian Yelich hit his 6th homer and his…wait for it….here it comes…where’d it go…did I  leave it in the car…no, it’s right here under my ass…and his 7th homer and his…crap, this one is in the car, isn’t it…nope, under the other cheek…and his 8th homer!  Add in 7 RBIs and he’s hitting a zillion.  Can we just crown him with back-to-back MVPs and sneak him into Ariana Grande’s room already?  After he wins his 2nd straight MVP, there will still (!!!) be someone next March who is saying something like, “Grey, you are wildly handsome, but I just don’t trust Yelich.  Can you talk me into him?”  Which they will say right after I’ve written 1,200 words on Yelich.  Doode is a beast who powers the Milwakuee’s Best.  Don’t funk up my jam!  Which is what Mr. Smuckers says to his wife when she messes up his DVR recordings of The Voice.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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The hot stove has been bubbling this winter, mostly thanks to Jerry Dipoto. Bullpen arms tend not to rank all that high in offseason coverage, so I cobbled together the notable moves for your reading pleasure. I know, I know, you’re thinking seriously ‘Wan, I’m not anywhere near the state of mind you need to think about the saves chase. There’s no rest for the closing wicked when it comes to the bullpen landscape, I’m afraid.

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I was waiting for Manny Machado or Bryce Harper to sign before dropping the last bit of offseason signings before the rankings that start on Monday, but apparently the Phillies only have $300 million for each, and they want $325-plus respectively, so we need to go forward with the news without Machado and Bryce.  The last bit of big news was Yusei Kikuchi signing with the Mariners.  He reminds me of every other Japanese pitcher, but not in a raycess way.  He reminds me of Miles Mikolas too, who was only Asian after being reborn.  It’s something about Asian pitchers, and non-Asian pitchers who go to Asia and return; they exercise some serious control.  Maybe it’s the culture.  I had a robot watch Gung Ho 15,000 times to tell me what it thinks and now the robot is speaking super-racist.  Yo, robot, why are you so culturally inappropriate?  “I have no culture of my own, so I adopt yours.  And I kill puppies.”  AHHH!!!  ROBOT MURDERER!!!  RUN!!!  Or roll your swivel chair towards a door if running is too much for you.  Kikuchi, which is going to be fun for me to say this year, comes with a lot less fanfare than Ohtani, but I do think he can be better than him, pitching-wise, in his first full season.  Ohtani is a unicorn in Babe Ruth’s body, we all know this.  Kikuchi reminds me of Mikolas and Ryu and others in that mold.  He’s a decent strikeout guy, but won’t blow people away, while also having impeccable command.  I’m definitely looking to draft him this year, then passing him up every other year when he fails to throw 130 IP in consecutive seasons because the Japanese also completely overwork their starters.  In fact (Grey’s got more!), the Mariners have already said Kikuchi will only throw an inning or so every fifth or sixth start to try to preemptively avoid the inevitable arm injury that befalls every Japanese starter.  For 2019, I’ll give Kikuchi projections of 9-7/3.67/1.18/136 in 151 IP.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2019 fantasy baseball:

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How does Franmil Reyes have such quick hand-eye coordination for a big guy?  Of course, it’s due to his 20/20 over 20/20 vision.  Franmil’s two-upping your vision!  Franmil Reyes isn’t just a big-time power hitter, he’s also the winner of the 1st Annual Kyle Blanks Look-A-Like Pageant.  You might remember Franmil’s now famous answer to the question, “California is going through a world-record drought, what would you do to solve this dilemma if you had one afternoon to spend with your doppelgänger, Kyle Blanks?”  Franmil took his time, then answered, “I’d go to the tallest peak in the Rockies with Mr. Blanks and we’d make snow angels, melting more snowflakes than Fox News and that water would roll into California.  I.e., This is my Fran-friction!”  I lifted myself from my Furby beanbag and cheered in my man cave.  Bless you, Franmil!  Bless you, child!  Also bless his power.  His batting average will come down some with a larger sample size, but there is no larger sample size than this 7-foot, 450-pound behemoth when it comes to dongs.  Sounded better in my head!  If you need power, I’d grab Franmil in all leagues.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

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You remember in Austin Powers when he gets his golf cart stuck in the tunnel and tries to make a u-turn and just goes back and forth unable to turn.  That’s how I feel going between Tyler White and Tyler O’Neill.  “Tyler O’Neill just homered…”  *backs up golf cart*  “Tyler White just homered…” *reverses golf cart*  “O’Neill now!”  *tries to turn wheel*  “White does it again!”  *gets out of golf cart and tries to move it manually, but have overestimated strength*  “O’Neill with a round tripper!”  *sighs, gets back in golf cart and checks Facebook menchies, overcome with helplessness of decisions*  I do not know which Tyler I would go with anymore.  Every day this week it has switched, sometimes it’s switched in the same day.  Tyler White is top four slugging percentage in the majors leagues when sorting by 100 plate appearances, but just as soon as you say that Tyler O’Neill will go and do something.  White is likely in a platoon, but when Ozuna returns, O’Neill will have same problems.  I’d own both, but White is my favorite…*sees O’Neill hit a homer, reverses golf cart*  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?