SAGNOF Report: Like Taking Second Base From A Baby

May 7, 2018 | Uncategorized | 8 Comments

SAGNOF info is the best way to get a leg up on the SAGNOF trade. (I challenged myself to use that anagram twice in the same sentence.) Challenge accomplished, and in the first line too! Wish I had longer arms than those baby T-Rex arms because the pats on the back wouldn’t stop. As I continue the back lauding, the week upcoming is a bear market in steals. The year is mimicking the previous year’s steals downward trend, as it is down almost 8% of the pace from last years total to date. So if you have a valuable piece of steals bait that isn’t doing so great, let’s say his name is “Billy Hamilton” and you are having trouble getting ample trade value for him… read this post so it can be explained that despite his sub-200 average and lower than expected 5 steals to date, he still has stolen base value. Yes, you are going to have to trade for 75 cents on the dollar, but explain this to someone looking for steals and are down on Billy that he is still top-20 in steals and with that 5 steals total, he would be at 20% of most teams total steals on the year in fantasy. That number obviously changes by league type and such, and I took an average of all the leagues I myself compete in (median is 31). So while I sit here and let you either figure out how to sell high or buy low on Billy Hamilton, continue the read and learn about the steals that will come, have happened, and the week’s thievery to be. Cheers!

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FAAB Five: Return Of The Matt

May 7, 2018 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball | 1 Comment

by: Paul "The" Martian

Another week, another FAAB run. Happy Cinco de Mayo for those of you who remember what happened this weekend, and Happy Cinco de Cuatro for fans of Arrested Development. As with every week, I bring you my five FAAB picks. These are players that most people will be looking at this week along with others that can be had for cheap, off-the-radar, stabs. I will also provide a few names for those ONLY-league players at the end. All FAAB percentages can be applied to leagues with any budget.

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The Bader The Harrison, The Sweeter The Buyin’, Son

September 8, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell | 211 Comments

by: Grey

When you were a kid, did you ever receive a formal invitation and it was addressed like this, “Master Albright?” Okay, now think about Harrison Bader getting a formal invite. I’m dead. That legit made me laugh for twenty minutes. I stopped midway to breath from an oxygen tank, but a full twenty minutes, nevertheless. Imagine this: Mom, “Harrison, come here and open your auntie’s wedding invite?” “Why does it say, Master Bader?” Dad, “You’ll know in a few years, son.” Not to mention, Master makes every little boy sound like the kid in The Toy. S’lame! I don’t even want to Google the origins for calling a boy, Master, because it’s prolly hella racist. Any hoo! Harrison Bader is playing every day, but the Cards do have 19 outfielders to juggle, so he’s not 100% guaranteed. He is hitting for power and average, and at the top of the lineup. With the Cards trying to make the playoffs, they’re putting their best lineup on the field and Bader has been a part of that. Even if Master Bader sounds like he wouldn’t play well with others. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Psyche! Before we get into the Buy, I just wanted to mention our Fantasy Football tools. Freudian, because this is my Buy and this would be your buy? P to the erhaps. But no purchase necessary, there’s a 7-day free trial, so you can give them a whirlybird for the first week if you like. Anyway II, the Buy/Sell:

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Closer Report: A Second Chance At Treinen

July 28, 2017 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 27 Comments

by: Smokey

The deadline is right around the corner, I know this because it said it would be right back and asked me to watch it’s dog while it shuffled up all the bullpen stuff that I just took the time to write out. The trade deadline is a mischievous beast, he will lure you with rumors and a weird one-windowed van and leave you out of the loop when it comes to bullpens. Contenders don’t care, they will have 2-3 closers or former closers on the roster… greedy is what I say. But I am still looking at situations in flux because I have no life. Scouring the goodies of bullpens left behind, and it takes me to Oakland. The traded recipient, that being Blake Treinen is in the prime ready-five chair as he watches Santiago Casilla implode for 4 blown saves in his last 16 appearances… and of course he blows the first chance he gets. No matter, I think that he still is a better bet going forward than Casilla. The bullpen cupboard is bare, there’s no Doolittle, there’s no Madson, there’s no more Axford. It is Treinen and Ryan Dull as the lone men standing, and Dull just got back from the DL. It is a matter of when, not if Blake gets the go of things and makes all the Bay City girls swoon with his saves. If the A’s go full on punt and trade the rotation to nothing, his potential for saves could be minimal, but chase away oh friends of the ‘NOF.

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Natties Don’t Go Light On The Brew

July 28, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 297 Comments

by: Grey

The fans that arrived early yesterday at Nationals Park were puzzled to find what appeared to be a show on HGTV. The newest Property Brother, Michael Blazek, the Brewers pitcher, opened a box from Ikea, and sat at home plate for six hours during the pregame, assembling something. At one point, he screamed to the heavens about being screwed, but Bryce Harper (3-for-5, 3 runs, 4 RBIs and his 26th and 27th homers) realized Blazek wasn’t saying he was screwed, he needed a screw the box was missing. Ryan Zimmerman (2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 21st and 22nd homers) had a fix, they could use Dusty’s toothpicks to hold together Blazek’s contraption. Then Anthony Rendon (2-for-4, 2 runs and his 21st homer) had a brilliant idea. The twine holding together the Nats’ bullpen could be used to hold together Dusty’s toothpicks. Brian Goodwin (3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 10th homer) and Wilmer Difo (2-for-4, 2 runs and his 3rd homer) were the first ones to the plate to see what Blazek had constructed. It was a bit shoddy in places, but it was holding up. Pulling back, we reveal that Blazek had built a baseball tee to place all his pitches on. All of these guys are either owned or are Wilmer Difo, with the exception of Brian Goodwin. He has three homers since the All-Star break, and has been cemented in the leadoff spot (for reasons only Dusty can explain). Won’t help you on average, but has a solid base of speed and power that could help in deeper leagues while he’s leading off, and especially when hitting off a tee. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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The Royal Hosmer Bombs

July 27, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 404 Comments

by: Grey

Lately, Eric Hosmer has been living up to his nickname, Mini Joey Votto. Hmm, that’s a bit long for a nickname. How about Mini Joey? Oh, I know, Embryonic Kangaroo! That rolls off the tongue! *Grey puts on a terrible Aussie accent* “Embryonic Kangaroo is a fair dinkum chockers! What a ripper! I need a sickie, a slab and a barbie on the back of the ute! Or just watch that Toni Collete movie where she’s in the wheelchair singing ABBA. That gets me knickers on the soddy poop schmear!” Yesterday, the Embryonic Kangaroo went 5-for-6, 5 runs, 6 RBIs and a slam (16) and legs (5), hitting .319. He has four homers post-ASB in 50 ABs, and seems to finally have the chockers on dinkum. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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J.D. Power Now Associates With The D-Backs

July 19, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 537 Comments

by: Grey

Yesterday, J.D. Martinez was traded to the Diamondbacks for Dawel Lugo, Sergio Alcantara and Jose King, a package that has been described by me as a .280, 40-homer hitter for Okay, Who Cares and So What. My visions of Yasmany Tomas returning and helping my NL-Only team went from “Hello, what’s your name, Pamela Sue?” to “No, my name is Pamela and I’m suing you for sexual harassment.” The ol’ 180 in the pants. Well, I’ll save the rest of my moans and/or groans for my shrink, since this is great news for Just Dong. That should be a 90 degree turn in the pants for Just Dong owners. Has he ever hit in Chase Field? Doesn’t matter, he’s about to love it. Outside of Coors and Miller, there’s no place I’d rather my player move for hitting and between-inning dips in a hot tub. (The Coors and Miller hot tubs are gnarly, by the way. “Did you say swell?” “No, I said swill.”) For FAAB, I’d go aggressively after Just Dong like he was the last guy to move to the NL, even if he might not be. He’s a 35-homer guy in Comerica. In Chase, he could be the equivalent to a 45-homer guy over the final ten weeks. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Closer Report: Second Half Rankings

July 14, 2017 | Closers | 50 Comments

by: Smokey

We break from the usual 12 dollar salads, donkeys, and hypothermia to breakdown, in basic fashion, the relief rankings for the final 70-plus games. Why is this helpful you may ask? Because for trade target reasons or chasing saves for points, you may want guy A over guy B. With the relief ranks it is as fluid as a clogged sewer drain, because on any given week, the middling type closer can hit bumps in the road and be removed from contention. So if you are using this as a trade commodity in your quest to add saves, my advice is this add the elite only. Nothing lower than the top-12. These guys are all nailed on and in an impressive state, barring an injury obviously. Now with that, we also have to realize that trades will happen… and take one reliever from a good situation to a better one, then on the reflexive of that, it can turn one with a job into a set-up situation. Regardless, here is my stab at the top relief pitchers for the second half of the Fantasy Baseball season. Cheers!

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Closer Report: Philly’s Blunt, Time For Pat

June 9, 2017 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 19 Comments

by: Smokey

The worst news in terms of closers, especially in a situation like Philadelphia, is the word: committee. I mean, it is kind of like getting free tickets to see the Village People, hell yes they are the Village People. But do you wanna be known for knowing more than two of their songs? Nope, not me. So look at this way, Pat Neshek got the save the other day after Gomez and Mortecia Neris had their turns at the gig. Now this isn’t a Pat on the back (pun intended for Neshek), because it is still a full blooded committee for a team that ranks in the bottom six in all of MLB in saves, save opportunities, and relief appearances with them having the lead. Add all that up and it goes back to what I was spitting a few months ago, are saves really worth the rigmarole of dumpster diving for futility? The problem with that whole “rostering multiple guys for a chance at a save” is all well and good if you are able to roster both or even three guys… and that is the dumbest thing I have ever typed out. Who in here has a Philly reliever let alone three? Show of hands? Yeah, you shouldn’t. So Neshek is worth a grab while they showcase him for trade value, and Neris is a hold because who knows when a last place team tries to keep it real? Let’s hop on the good foot and see what’s going down with the late-gamers…

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Closer Report: This Just In, K-Rod Out

May 12, 2017 | Closers | 15 Comments

by: Smokey

Well, the demise of the active leader in career saves has happened. I can remember the days when he burst on the scene all wide-eyed and rally monkey backed. That, unfortunately, was a dogs age in closer years. Hell, most closers now a days are judged by weeks instead of years. I personally don’t wanna think that he is completely done closing, but I think that he is done closing with the tigers (barring an injury or three). So now it is the Justin Wilson show. He is no stranger to high-leverage spots as he has been a critical holds guy for the past three years. For comparison’s sake, think Tony Watson type of reliever… they even came up together with the Pirates to boot. So the main question is will Wilson continue as such as the Tigers closer? I say why not. Joe Jimenez isn’t ready for prime time yet, or they don’t wanna throw the reigns on him yet. The team has looked mediocre, and sorta old. So alleviating Wilson to the closer role does two things: Makes their best reliever in the bullpen the closer, and it gives him even more trade value should the Tigers fall out of the race and eventually sell of some pieces. Saves are ownable everywhere, and this doesn’t appear to be a committee type thing, so if you own him good on ya. Let’s see what else is going down on Save Street lately…

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Rookie Nookie Lovers Seek A Cody Pendant

April 26, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 590 Comments

by: Grey

Sign says, ‘Don’t stay away, fools,’ cause Cody Bellinger rules! No? Okay, go to sleep. “Go to sleep” is my new favorite thing I say that my Cougar can’t stand. She’s like, “Why are you excited?” Rather than saying, “I’m excited because Cody Bellinger was called up,” I say, “Go to sleep.” Is that bad? I feel like her reaction is like the step before divorce. “Baby, we’re good, go to sleep.” “It’s 4 o’clock on a Tuesday.” “Yeah, go to sleep.” And then we’re divorced. You know who isn’t divorced? Cody Bellinger! Okay, I’m talking crazy, but I’m excited, you get it. In 18 games of Triple-A, he was hitting .343 with five homers and seven steals. I will now cackle maniacally. Who is this guy, Justice Eric Ruth Thames but with speed? I can’t even. *puts handkerchief to forehead, and faints* Oh, thank you for catching me in my dream state, Giancarlo. This is funny (not funny), Bellinger had three homers last year in Triple-A. Guess how many games? Oh, three. Three games! I wanna project him over five months for 17 HRs, 20 SBs, and .280, but feel like that is too conservative, that’s how crazy I am for him. Yes, you should absolutely grab him. Where will he play when Pederson returns from the DL? Not sure, but worth grabbing him now to see how the Dodgers handle it. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Yoenis Trespedes & Lucas Deuxda

April 12, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 565 Comments

by: Grey

The City of Brotherly Love opened up its sweaty arms, where the hair is growing weirdly on the backside of the biceps, and said, “Come here, and get some of these meatballs that Clay Buchholz is throwing.” Yoenis Cespedes hit his 2nd, 3rd and 4th homers (4-for-6, 3 runs, 5 RBIs). In Philly, they say he hit three wiz wits and a Tastykake; Neil Walker (2-for-5, 1 run) had a Tastykake and a dollop of light cream cheese; Asdrubal Cabrera (4-for-6, 3 runs, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer) had a wiz wit, a Tastykake and three dollops of light cream cheese; Lucas Duda (4-for-6 and his 2nd and 3rd homers) had two wiz wits, a Tastykake and a dollop of the good stuff that is like curdled mother’s milk. Yoenis started off slow, which is a ludicrous thing to say, he has four homers in eight games. He’s on pace for 80 homers. I mean, you really need to take a lesson from Uncle LL, and chillllllllll. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?