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Dan Pants

Author: Dan Pants

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Dan Pants

Jarred Puts on a Kelenic

May 15, 2021 | Daily Notes | 50 Comments

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Freshly promoted Mariners rookie outfielder slash phenom slash heart throb slash Seattle savior slash pride of Pike’s Place, Jarred Kelenic put on a clinic in just his second game in the majors with three hits in four at-bats, scoring two runs and his first big league home run, a 2-run shot to right in the third inning that put the Ms up 3-0. After a disappointing debut on Thursday where he went 0-for-4 without reaching base, the dinger was Kelly’s (can I call him Kelly?) first major league hit, but he wasn’t done showing off his skillz with a “z” yet. We got to witness that highly touted speed of his, as he hustled out two doubles and added an additional RBI out of that C-Attle lead off spot. Mmhm. The super prospect is likely owned everywhere at this point and for good reason, I imagine what follows is some hilarious worst-to-first Major League type scenario where Jarred carries the Mariners back to relevance. Please let it be so. This isn’t entirely out of the realm of possibility, Kyle Seager and Mitch Haniger also homered Friday night and raised eyebrow emoji face…do all of a sudden the Ms have an offense? If Kelenic is going to hit like this, and going to hit lead off, it kickstarts this offense in a huge way and just his presence could make a lot some of these players more valuable. I’m looking at you, Dylan Moore (2-for-4, run, 7th steal). Wishful thinking, perhaps? Still Kelenic’s big night Friday was exciting to see, and a glimpse of hope for a fanbase that hasn’t seen their team in the post season in almost 20 years. Is he going to hit three extra base hits every night? Maybe add some steals tomorrow? Close out games? Strike out sides? No-hit the Tigers? Call balls and strikes? Probably! Either way, you’ve got to be hype to see what’s next for Jarred Kelenic. This kid’s gonna be a star! Ha-cha-cha!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Wade To Go Miley With No-No

May 8, 2021 | Daily Notes | 26 Comments

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Wade Miley had it going on Friday night in Cleveland pitching his first career no-hitter allowing just one walk and base runner reaching on an error while striking out eight batters for his fourth win of the year. Wait–he did what? Spit Take! It was just his second complete game shutout in ever, that’s right folks, in ever. In over 250 starts, Miley had only completed nine innings once before, back in April 2016 against the Royals. OK, so that seems normal. Miley joins Joe Musgrove, Carlos Rodon, and John Means for the fourth no-hitter this year and it’s only May (and we’re not even counting Madison Bumgarner’s 7-inning no-no)! Yep, that also seems totally normal. Certainly nothing wrong with the abysmal offenses on a lot of MLB clubs right now. And let’s not forget to mention this was the second time the Cleveland Baseball Team has been no-hit this season. I know pitchers tend to have the advantage earlier in the year, while batters heat up when the weather gets hot, hot, hot–but this seems a little silly, no? Not that I’m complaining. After refusing to draft a starting pitching until the 8th round, I now have fantasy teams that roster several pitchers with no-hitters this season. NBD #humblebrag. Wade’s been more than serviceable this year rocking a 2.00 ERA, 0.75 WHIP, and 27/8 K/BB ratio but I can’t imagine any stats I throw at you are going to make you add this guy. It’s Wade Miley! The bigger story here is how bad some of these offenses have been. As for Miley, he remains a streamer in most leagues but gets a juicy start with Pittsburgh next week. He’s playing for his seventh team in 10 years so it’s not unusual if you got some warm fuzzies from Miley’s big night. He’s a genuinely great clubhouse presence and you’ve likely rooted for him at some point in the past decade when he played for your own local baseball team. So Wade To Go Miley!

Here’s what else happened in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Alex Kirilloff to the Races

May 1, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 59 Comments

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It’s only appropriate that on Kentucky Derby weekend Minnesota rookie outfielder and hotshot phenom mega-prospect slash heartthrob Alex Kirilloff had a little home run derby of his own Friday night going 2-for-4 with his first two career home runs and four runs batted in. That deserves a second Mint Julep! Don’t mind if I do. Derby Day is all about waking up at 6AM and wearing your fanciest hat, only to wait around all day to watch a two-minute race that only a handful of people really understand. White people in the South dressing fancy and day-drinking?? Hmm, is this a racist thing? Are we sure it’s not a racist thing? Okay then if Gronk’s doing it, I’m picking Essential Quality to win big, mostly because that’s the only horse I know. But speaking of Essential Quality, let’s discuss Alex Kirilloff in case some of the hype faded after he went an uninspiring 3-for-26 with six strikeouts to start his major league career. “These things take time,” is a way you’d never hear a horse race described but could be true for a player like Alex. If you grabbed him last week when Grey told you to BUY or last November when you read his Alex Kiriloff fantasy, your patience is finally being rewarded. Here’s what Grey said about AK last week, “Alex Kirilloff could be Alex Verdugo from the moment he’s called up until the end of the season. Today, it’s all Alex talk. ‘Alexa, who’s more all Alex than other Alexes?'” That’s me quoting Grey, talking to a robot! And Alex Verdugo–wow, whata comp! I say that lovingly AND sarcastically, but the truth is the guys got pop and should hit for decent average. Think a 25-30 homer .275 average-type with a few steals thrown in to make you extra squee. If those look like numbers your team could utilize you’re not alone, and you’re in luck, Kirilloff is still available in over 60% of fantasy leagues and probably shouldn’t be. I’m going to toast my third mint julep at 8AM to the Twinkies, tip my fanciest sweat-stained baseball cap to Alex, and I’d add him everywhere I could. All bets are Kirilloff!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Jazz Up Your Fantasy Team

April 17, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 33 Comments

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Ryan Gosling wants you to believe in Jazz Chisholm. Did you know that I love Ryan Gosling? Not just because La La Land helped me rediscover my love of Los Angeles. Or because he’s a bird if Rachel McAdams is a bird. Not even because of his squeaky voice in Gangster Squad or his face tattoo in the Place Beyond the Pines. Nope. I love him because he saved Jazz. Baby Goose loves Jazz. And now he’s got that crazy, stupid love for Marlins rookie middle infielder Jazz Chisholm, who had himself a night Friday going 2-for-3 with his third dinger and helped spur the Fish (get hooked!) to victory. The 23-year-old is currently slashing .294/.405/.706 with three jacks, seven runs, and six RBI through his first 12 games. Did I mention he has three steals? Because this is a power-speed combo available in over 65% of fantasy leagues. Mmhm. Dude is smooth like…uh, smooth jazz, I guess. Anyway, as I did my 5-10 minutes of toilet research for this post I noticed many articles referenced some eye-popping stats on Chisholm’s baseball savant page. Most notably, his average exit velocity is way above the league norms (93.9), and his 34.8% barrel percentage is one of the highest in the league. Yes, but what does it all mean, nerd?? It means he’s absolutely demolishing baseballs. Molly-whopping. Mashing. And Fueling that insane .783 XSLG%. Now, obviously, the 12 strikeouts in 34 ABs is more than a bit concerning, but he’s also drawn seven walks and hasn’t been chasing pitches outside the zone on those Ks. If the Jazz Dinger can keep his strikeouts down and continue to be selective with the pitches he swings at there is a rare raw power-speed combo here that would make Emma Stone blush. He could be a 25-25 guy! Gosling says Jazz is “conflict and compromise, And It’s Just… It’s New Every Time. It’s Brand New Every Night!” Intoxicating enthusiasm from The Gos and he’s right. Grey told you to BUY and all that Jazz could be worth a speculative add wherever you need middle infield help. Time to Jazz up your fantasy team!

Here’s what else I say Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Clase Closed Game Making Case for Space in Closer Race at Chase

April 10, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 64 Comments

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Joe Musgrove pitched the first no-hitter in Padres history Friday night, but this isn’t about him. It’s not about how he dominated the dreadful (so, so bad) Texas Rangers line up allowing just a single hit batsman to reach base in the fourth inning. Or how he he struck out 10 of these so, so bad Rangers. Moss Grove is already owned in all fantasy leagues. If he’s available well then by all means go pick him up now. This is about a player you can pick up. The Cleveland Baseball Team’s new, maybe, possibly, could be, I really don’t know but can you imagine if it was, closer Emmanuel Clase. Manny got his first save of the season Friday night pitching a perfect inning with two strikeouts. That’s right. Clase Closed. It’s almost too perfect. He did it with just 14 pitches. He reached 100 mph on 11 of those pitches and topped out at 101.2 mph with his cutter. Sweet sassy molasse! Let’s give him the chop! James Karinchak was the de facto closer in many minds going into the season but he’s blown a save and he’s also anti-VAX which is not a good look right now. We just might have ourselves a bit of a committee. So let’s speculate. Considering only Nick Wittgren and Clase have gotten saves so far, and Nick Wittgren doesn’t have a 101.2 mph cutter, hmm, imma grab Clase if I’ve targeting saves, or just some stinky, smelly cheese. He’s got the stuff to run away with the ninth inning gig in C-Land and the Cleveland Baseball Team’s closer has usually paid rich fantasy dividends in the past. I wouldn’t drop your James Karinchaks for him just yet, but I’d grab him wherever I needed saves. Clase closed! Ha! I love it!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

John Means Biznizz Makes Sox Look Like Shiznizz

April 3, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 32 Comments

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Aaaand we’re back. Aaand John Means is an Ace now. Wait–rewind. Means stifled the Boston bats and spoiled their home opener Friday afternoon, allowing just a single base runner (one hit) in seven innings of work and striking out five to notch his first win of the season. I know exactly what you’re thinking outdated Fry meme–not sure if Red Sox are this bad or John Means is this good. Well, as bad as the Sawx looked, Means probably pitched one of his best games in ever. He commanded the zone with 65 of his 95 pitches thrown for strikes, and generated 14 swings-and-misses, eight with changeup alone, which can be an especially nasty pitch when he’s got it working, paired with his 4-seamer. After an awful start to 2020, Means finished strong in September with a 1.52 ERA, 0.63 WHIP and 30 strikeouts in 23.2 IP averaging around 94 mph on his fastball, up about 2 mph from 2019. Grey told you to BUY, gushing about his xBA and saying “if he can keep those gains, velocity increases, and stop handing out more gopher balls than a veterinarian with weird party favors, John Means could be a top 25 starter while costing nowhere near that price.” And that’s me quoting Grey! Look, I understand the hesitation owning Orioles pitchers, and Means HR/9 doesn’t exactly inspire confidence. In fact, when I drafted Means on draft day I got a audible “HA!” for the pick. But we’ll see who’s laughing in September. Sure things aren’t getting any easier for the homer-prone lefty as he travels to New York next week to take on the Yankees, but Means is owned in less than 50% of leagues and has got some major breakout potential. I think he’s worth a flier at that price wherever he’s available. Means means business! That’s two “means”, and that means something?  Who else is confused? Where else you going to get an Ace after draft day. Now your chance! I means it!

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Damn Daniel Ponce de Leon

September 26, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 11 Comments

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Someone had his white Vans on! Daniel Ponce de Leon had another strong start Friday night pitching 6.1 innings allowing just three base runners (1 hit, 2 BB) and one run while striking out six for his first win of 2020. He had a no-hitter going through the first six innings until an Orlando Garcia home run, the only hit he surrendered, ruined his bid. Damn Daniel, 2016 called–they want their meme back. I touched on PDL (can I call him PDL? sounds like a bad light beer) last week and concluded he was too risky to touch, but his 3.15 ERA, 0.95 WHIP and 28/6 K/BB in September tell me something has definitely clicked. Considering he was rocking a 7+ ERA at the start of the month that gives you a sense of the strides he’s made in just a few short weeks. Perhaps he discovered the dot, dot, dot…fountain of youth? I’m sorry! I had to. Regardless the win was his first as a starting pitcher in 20 tries–that’s right 20! And yes, that is the record, albeit a fairly depressing record to hold. Maybe its these Brewers’ hitters, who he’s struck out 15 times this month to pad his 12.6 k/9 in 20 IP in September, or maybe it was finally getting the run support he needed (Cards scored zero runs for him in half his starts this year). More likely he started consistently locating his elevating fastball which allowed him to mix in breaking balls and keep opposing hitters off balance. Whatever it has been, his 4.96 ERA and 1.32 WHIP don’t tell the full story here. I’m going to choose to believe his 31.5 K% and .221 BABIP are more indicators of the pitcher DPdL is and he’s a player I’ll be keeping a very close eye on this postseason even if he’s just pitching in a middle relief role. So grab your white Vans and make sure they’re cleaner than the “WAP” radio edit because I’m telling you Daniel Ponce de Leon could be a a 2021 sleeper to watch!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Bohm Sparks Phillies Offensive Explosion

September 19, 2020 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 29 Comments

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Rookie Alec Bohm continued his explosive September Friday night going two for three with a run and an RBI in game one and one for three with a run and his first career steal in the second game. Oh my, did he just steal a base! *swoons* Alec’s underwhelming power to start his career has made it hard on hilarious jokesters like myself who just want to pun all day and improv all night. No bombs for Bohm? What about a nice lip balm? Does that work? Fret not, Bohm-dot-com has picked it up lately with two Bohm-bombs in the past week. So maybe Alec is more of an opposite field contact guy than a  ding dong dinger guy? Or maybe it’s his first year in the league and once he adjusts he’ll be a monster and yes I’m absolutely going to draft him everywhere in 2021? Melikes the latter one most. His manager thinks he’s a future 40 home run hitter and Gabe Kapler seems to know exactly what’s up. *hard cough* But forget about the power for a sec, Alec has multi-hit games in nine of his last 20 starts, and has hit safely in all but two games this month. He’s slashing .359/.400/.551 with three Bohm bombs and 14 RBI in September and that’s no joke! I almost wrote this lede about another scrubby Red Sox prospect, but I didn’t (you’re welcome!) because I noticed Bohm was a BUY and was still criminally under owned at less than 35%! What gives? He should have been scooped up in August. Bohm could be the dot, dot, dot…spark your team needs to dot, dot, dot…explode in your final week of fantasy. I’m sorry, I have t,–and you have to pick up Bohm and win your final week. This kid’s gonna be a star–ha-cha-cha!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Gimme Moore

September 12, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 21 Comments

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Mariners’ outfielder slash infielder slash superhero Dylan Moore continued his onslaught on the MLB Friday night hitting his seventh home run and stealing his 10th base of the year. The 28 year old is now slashing .282/.362/.563 in just 28 games played and is looking like a bonafide fantasy darling. A slam & legs, you say? In Seattle, the slam & legs is served up mid-air at Pike’s Market and must be caught before consuming. Chase it down with piping hot latte from Seattle’s Own (but not ‘Seattle’s Own’) Starbucks, because what goes better with fresh fish besides espresso? Dylan’s got three homers and four steals in the past week! He’s also reached base safely in every game he’s played since the start of September. The steals are why I added him but the homers are why I’m now obsessed with him. Mmmoore. This no-simp September thing is going to be tough. He’s over 50% owned at the time I’m writing this and that number’s going to probably double over the weekend, but I figured you deserved a Dylan Moore lede regardless of ownership percentage and also I couldn’t get that Britney Spears song out of my head. In more important slash concerning news you should know, an anonymous San Francisco Giants’ player (probably not Pablo, definitely not Yaz) tested positive for the COVID Friday which I assume means all Giants games are cancelled for the next 5-7 days so here’s your heads up to find some warm bodies to replace your Giants and Padres this weekend ASAP as possible.  As for Moore, if you still read the late season Razzball posts you know I covered Kyle Lewis in my final post of 2019, so there are some gems to be uncovered in my lazy, late-September musings. Sometimes looking to 2021 is the best plan of action, especially when you know that each post could be your last as there is always risk of the entire Razzball staff contracting COVID and the blog getting shut down for the final two weeks. There’s nothing we could do to prevent, there’s only one straw in the office and the plastic ones are bad for the planet. Anyway! TL;DR Pick up Moore if he’s out there and drop all your Giants except Baby Yaz!

Here’s what else I saw Friday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Philllies Trade To Make Closer Role Workman

August 22, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 35 Comments

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After blowing the game in epic fashion Thursday night and then blowing another game same-day, hours later even epicly-er the Philadelphia Phillies have finally said enough is enough. Their relievers are rocking a icy 8.07 ERA, with an even more inflated 10.93 ERA in the ninth inning. Wow. That’s like Red Sox-relievers-bad. So who did they reach out to? Who else but the awful reliever experts, the Boston Red Sox, and Philly acquired Brandon Workman and Heath Hembree Friday night in hopes of bring some stability to the late inning relief. In return they send RHPs Connor Seabold and Nick Pivetta to Boston. Pivetta, a sabremetrics darling, will likely slot into the starting rotation immediately despite his ugly 15.88 ERA, 1.94 WHIP. He’s given up 10 runs in just three games this year so he should fit right in with this pitching staff. Still, dude strikes out everyone. A 10.32 K/9 in 2018 shows flashes of what could be a valuable starter some day. I have streamed him many times in the past and he’s burned me even more times, and I look forward to this happening again real soon. Connor Seabold (2.24 ERA, 1.01 WHIP and 58/11 K/BB in the minors), could also likely find his way into the rotation at some point this year, given the lack of competition at the big league level. Back to Phillies, Workman should immediately take over as closer and could see a boost as he’s better than his 4.07 ERA and 1.80 suggest and has converted all four of his save chances this year. The Phillies are a considerably better team so the save opportunities should be more frequent. Workman is likely already rostered in most fantasy leagues, even though he probably shouldn’t be. However, his successor in Boston, Matt Barnes, is still unowned in most leagues, and that is likely to change quick. If you’re as desperate for saves as I am for positive feedback Barnes and his 5.59 ERA are the obvious choice for save chances for Boston going forward. He notched his first save of the year Friday night allowing just one hit. Pick him up if you really need the saves or you just hate yourself.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Jesse Winker Keeps Open Eye on Prize

August 15, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 18 Comments

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Jesse Winker had his open eye locked on the baseball Friday night as he extended his hot streak going 2-for-3 with two home runs and three RBI. It was the 26 year old outfielder’s first multi-homer game in ever. Winky’s now slashing an insane .365/.484/.712 with five jacks, eight RBI and a steal for good measure. But I’m not finished yet! Wink’s been hotter than Cardi B’s “WAP” video, batting .688 in the past five days and hitting all five of his homers in that stretch. To be fair, his .424 BABIP and .346 ISO aren’t exactly sustainable numbers, even by a Trout-Mookie frankenbaby (although that does sound adorable)–regardless, Jesse is a hot little potato right now. This is not completely out of nowhere either, as he flashed some pop with Cinnci last season, batting .269 with 16 bombs in 113 games. Are you intrigued yet? Because Jesse is still available in just about half of fantasy leagues! Where do I sign, you ask? And has this pen been sanitized? Well, unfortunately, like everything in 2020, Winker isn’t exactly a no thinker (err, brainer) of a pick up just yet. The Reds announced Friday that a PTBNL has tested positive for COVID-19 and Saturday’s game against the Pittsburgh Pirates has been postponed. That’s all the information available to me at the moment, but I assume if this turns into a Marlins/Cardinals situation, then adding Reds players right now (no matter how hot) is probably not pro stratz, bro. Whatever happens, I’ll always remember that five day stretch where Jesse Winker was the hottest man in baseball, and I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “wow he didn’t make a ‘Winker? I hardly know her!’ joke this whole time. But you’d be wrong. I actually did. It just wasn’t funny! Lol. Jokes aside, let’s hope the Reds can get back to playing baseball ASAP as possible.

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Pants

Taijuan Made in Seattle

August 1, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 28 Comments

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We got a week in the books, folks, and I didn’t think I’d being doing another post this year after the unthinkable, unspeakable, most-obvious-thing-to-happen happened when a good quarter of the Florida Marlins team tested positive for coronavirus. Most would think when a worst case scenario like this occurs, the season would be halted, or at the very least restructured. (After watching some NBA last night, the bubble certainly appears to have been the way to go). But no. It’s just the Marlins, right? Who cares. I wonder to myself, “Self, would the reaction have been the same had 15 Yankees tested positive.” But they didn’t, it’s just the Marlins. The “worst” team in baseball. Besides this was a one off thing, right, what are the odds another team gets it? *Fast forward three days* Oh, three teams have it now, you say? Welp. And Commissioner slash idiot Rob Manfred claims he could shut down the season Monday if the “players aren’t more careful.” L-O-L. Careful like sending hundreds of players and workers back into situations where they not only have to travel, but its often impossible to maintain social distancing? So now we have six teams not even playing, teams that actually “matter”, and its an absolute mess not just for players and fans, but anyone trying to field a daily fantasy line up. Phew. OK, sorry for the tangent but this could very well be my final post of 2020, so I’m going to write about what I want, and I want to write about Taijuan Walker’s best start and first win in almost four years! After missing the majority of the past two seasons due to Tommy John, Taijuan Walker returned “home” to start in Seattle for the first time since 2016 Friday night. Walker looked dominant pitching seven scoreless innings, allowing just one hit, two walks and striking out eight A’s. Tai consistently threw strikes and used his fastball effectively, topping out at 95 mph. Sweet sassy molassy! His Jordan cleats were hitting different, too. It’s always the shoes! The cutter was cutting, his breaking ball had good movement but it was really the way he commanded that fastball that made the difference. After a rough first start in Houston last week, it was an excellent rebound for Walker to get him and the M’s back on track. Rotoworld called a Walker add quote “risky” today, but as I ranted above, this season is all about risk, so why not take a risk on Taijuan Walker!

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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