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Author: Grey

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Kutter Crawford, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper

January 11, 2024 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 74 Comments

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There’s so many great starters after the top 200. It’s a stacked. It being starting pitchers sleepers. There were a bunch of guys who I wanted to write fantasy baseball sleepers for, but I just didn’t have enough time before the 2024 fantasy baseball rankings jump off this Monday. I mentioned the other day in my Mitch Keller sleeper that guys who aren’t mentioned as sleepers aren’t sleepers, but it means there’s more of a chance that makes them sleepers. Kutter Crawford feels like he falls in that group of players who aren’t sleepers because they weren’t mentioned as sleepers, so I had to mention him as a sleeper to make him a sleeper.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

MacKenzie Gore, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper

January 7, 2024 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 38 Comments

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I wrote the title, Nick Pivetta, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper, and I began to howl. I was howling. I opened my door and looked up in the sky, blinding myself by the sun. I had to make sure it wasn’t night time or a full moon. I am not a werewolf, so I was howling because I wrote Nick Pivetta, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper. Since howling is not the reaction one should have when writing a sleeper post, I deleted it and wrote MacKenzie Gore, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Braxton Garrett, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper

January 4, 2024 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 57 Comments

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There’s some starting pitcher sleepers for 2024 fantasy baseball, or any year, honestly, who take about two seconds to locate, depending on how long it takes you to open your eyes and the latest ADP charts. The former should be a millisecond, depending on the amount of Ambien you’re taking, and the latter depends on your internet connection. Scan all the pitchers and try not to bulge your eyes too much like you’re an MLB mascot with Graves disease when you see Braxton Garrett around pick 190 overall.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

NFBC Draft Champions Draft Recap: Pitchers Be Flying

January 1, 2024 | Featured, Our Leagues | 81 Comments

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Took part in my first 2024 fantasy baseball draft, and, if this is any indication, pitchers are getting drafted like geese in Duck, Duck, Goose if that were played on the course of a marathon. Ducks are hitters; pitchers are geese. It’s like this: Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, GOOSE! Then a run that is marathon-length where pitchers go one after another forever, then, finally, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck, GOOSE! And another run of pitchers that gooses on forever. Eventually, it calms in the 100’s when all pitchers are picked so dry you’re left thinking, “Yu Darvish has one bad elbow, but his non-throwing arm seems fine.” Okay, for those of you who don’t know, this is a two-catcher, 15-team league that is draft and hold — there are no waivers. Bunch of Razzballers got together and took part in the 50-round slow draft. Hopefully we get another going soon. Stay tuned. Anyway, here’s my Draft Champions draft recap:

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Grey

Edouard Julien, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper

December 28, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 27 Comments

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Shohei Ohtani is The Unicorn. This is not disputed anymore. It’s fact. Check your Encyclopedia Brittanica. It says it under Unicorn, The. Edouard Julien has some unicorn qualities. Not in the same ways as Ohtani, clearly. He’s not going to give you a Quality Start with 12 Ks, obviously. He’s one-of-a-kind in a way more recognizable way. Call him The Unicode.  ASCII not what Edouard Julien can do for you, but what you can do–Actually, ASCII what The Unicode can do. He is better than the guy who gets his drink from the barista counter, then proceeds to stand there texting for ten minutes and blocking everyone else, that’s The Unichode.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Isaac Paredes, 2024 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 27, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 38 Comments

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Decided to do a little search of 2nd half splits. I don’t necessarily believe that all guys who were good in the 2nd half last year will just continue their great hitting into the 1st half of 2024. Some guys may just be 2nd half hitters. Some guys might’ve just had a hot, say, August, and it’s making their 2nd half look better than it was. Other guys might just had a good 2nd half, and that’s all it was.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Jordan Westburg, 2024 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 26, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 34 Comments

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I love trying to find sleepers. It’s the hunt. It’s like the ultimate big-game hunting, only I’m not on safari asking a guide, “Did I just get malaria from that mosquito? No? Great.” Then three minutes later, “Do you think I just got malaria from that mosquito? No? Terrific.” Then three minutes later in perpetuity for the next two weeks. It’s that without mosquito-borne diseases. That’s me, bros and five sisters! Jordan Westburg, he came to me in a flash-bang while I was out big-game sleeper hunting. I was perusing Statcast for exit velocity, as a nerd might do.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Ke’Bryan Hayes, 2024 Fantasy Sleeper

December 25, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers, Featured | 37 Comments

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Ya know what I’m finding myself keen on more than in years past? Using the phrase ‘keen on?’ Close, but no. Guys who don’t strike out much and hit for a nice average. Getting all mature in my fantasy baseball wonts. Like a big ol’ smart nerd! Not a dumb nerd like someone who plays fantasy baseball and keeps going after guys who will hit .210 because they’re sexy. Hey, one love to Jack Suwinski, but I’m eyeing his teammate, Ke’Bryan Hayes.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Dodger Green Helps Convince Yamamoto To Wear Dodger Blue

December 21, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 65 Comments

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The Dodgers have spent more than $1.1 billion this winter with the signings of Yoshinobu Yamamoto, Shohei Ohtani and Tyler Glasnow. Eight teams haven’t spent a million. Is this [watches a butterfly flap out of one’s hand] competitive balance? So, the Mets’ owner Steve Cohen flew to Japan, took him out to dinner and Yamamoto went home with the Dodgers. [searching PornHub for cuckold, seeing a video of Steve Cohen paying the check for Yamamoto’s dinner] Damn, that’s brutal. Yamamoto was also rumored to possibly be on the Giants’ radar, but Yoshinobu saw a news report of a smash and grab at a vape shop in The Castro, and decided against San Francisco. Ouch. As I believe I said before, how about rather than the Dodgers buying free agents, they just get all the free agents and tell us which ones they don’t want. Might be easier that way. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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