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Ayo whaddup it’s ya boy Grey Albright aka the Fantasy Master Lothario aka The Guy Who Eats Takis Every Day aka The Guy Who Cool Sculpted The Fat Off His Stomach After Eating Takis Every Day aka The Guy Who Started A ZZ Top Cover Band Named The Gay Beards And Had To Explain To Everyone I Meant Gay As In Happy And Beards As In Beards aka The Guy In Starbucks Asking For The Bathroom Code While Carrying His Entire Wardrobe aka The Guy Who Goes Oop All The Time aka The Guy Still Vaping aka The Guy Standing Behind You aka The Guy Wondering Why Lumberjacks And Lesbians Both Wear Flannel aka The Guy In Charge Of Moseying At Your Local Frontiertown aka The Guy Typing This With His Pinkie Toe. I’m here with 2020 content, snitches! Okay, I need to sit down, I’ve exhausted myself in the excitement of it all. Well, the joke’s on my butt, I have nowhere to sit! A quick preamble about the 2020 fantasy baseball rookie series that is coming from me over the next few weeks. Rookies could get a post if they meet MLB eligibility requirements, less than 130 ABs or 50 IP. That means no Bo Bichette, no Aristides Aquino, no Kyle Tucker (just missed at 131 ABs), and no Trent Grisham. In 2012, the first player I highlighted was Mike Trout. That wasn’t an accident. I said in the Mike Trout post, “He’s ranked number one for me. Numero uno. The Big Mahoff. He’s the big Statue of Liberty in New York, not that girly one in Paris!” Since then, I’ve attempted to make the first rookie post about a prospect that will be the top rookie for fantasy the following year. Last year that honor went to Vlad Jr. Yes, it’s an honor, don’t be so condescending. The year before it was Ronald Acuña Jr. This year the top fantasy prospect isn’t no ordinary man, this is the prospect I be seeing in my sleep. Luis Robert will be your number one 2020 fantasy baseball rookie. Will Lou Bob be named to the All-Century Team in 80 years or edged out by a robot with grabby hands named the Hitter-Tron that my great-great-nephew will sue, due to trademark infringement, only to find out it’s the same Hitter-Tron that once graced this little fantasy baseball blog called Razzball? Can Lou Bob be a top 50 overall player in 2020? Will Luis Robert even get enough at-bats? Let’s stop the questions and start the answers! Okay, one more question… Anyway, what we can expect of Luis Robert for 2020 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So, how’s everyone holding up without baseball every day?  I don’t know what to do with myself!  Yesterday I wandered into a Starbucks and told the coffeerista about Mike Clevinger for 2020.  Then I sobbed into a cheddar scone until someone asked me to leave.  We’ve gone over the final 2019 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters and the top 20 starters.  This is different than Final Fantasy rankings where you rank Final Fantasy 1 thru Final Fantasy 15.  That’s hardcore nerd shizz!  This is simply fantasy baseball — we’re softcore nerds like Emmanuelle is to porn. So, there’s no more of these godforsaken recap posts left.  You’re welcome.  I, my over-the-internet friend, will be talking next about 2020 rookies — PUT ON YOUR FREAKIN’ SHOES! Not sure why I just yelled that. Anyway, here’s the top 40 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

All the final 2019 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters are done.  For those that skipped today’s title, this starts the top 20 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball.  This is NOT for 2020 (caps for those who can’t read titles; supposedly it’s easier to read caps, I have my doubts). This is a recap. Will these affect next year’s rankings?  Sure.  But not entirely.  Like when you had a knee replacement, this is a recap! To recapitulate the recap, these rankings are from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater.  We’re (me’re) using it to fairly gauge our (my) preseason rankings.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

With the top 40 outfielders for 2019 fantasy baseball, we’ve finished all the hitter recaps. We meaning me, but I’ll include you. No, that’s not a cue to try to hold my hand. Why are you now patting my butt? Don’t muss my hair! The pitching recap will begin next. You can hardly wait. No, you! To recap, the end of the season rankings are based on our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater.  I felt the easiest way to keep it objective would to go this route.  This way when I say someone finished 30th and I ranked them 23rd in the preseason, it carries more weight like Willians Astudillo.  Anyway, here’s the top 40 outfielders for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Went over the catchers1st basemen2nd basemen and shortstops and top 20 3rd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball.  Guess what’s next!  No, not pitchers. Read the title, man.  In 2010, there were only 5 outfielders that hit 30 homers. In 2011, there were 9. 14 in 2012. In 2013, there were 3. A small bounce back with 6 in 2014. Eight in 2015. 11 outfielders in 2016. In 2017, there were 15.  Nine in 2018. Last year, there were only 10. This year…DRUM ROLL!….everyone hit 30 homers.  Okay, specifically there was 22 outfielders who hit 30 homers. As for steals, there were 14 outfielders who stole 30 bases in 2012, 10 in 2013, 11 in 2014, five in 2015, seven in 2016, only two in 2017 and five in 2018. This year we’re down to four outfielders stealing 30 and eight players overall, down from eleven.  As before, these rankings are from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 outfielders for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It did not hurt the depth of the top 20 3rd basemen for 2019 that nearly all of them had other position eligibility. There’s only nine new names from the other recap posts, so it’s no surprise someone like Hunter Dozier barely made this top 20 for 3rd basemen, but was 15th on the 1st basemen. Nearly all of those 1st basemen also ended up here. Makes it less exciting for you to read this post, but makes it an absolute joy for me to write it! This recap ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked players in the preseason. Now, let’s get this, young money.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The top 20 shortstops for 2019 (what this is, read the title once in a while) are deeper than the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 (not clickbait at all), and even deeper than the top 20 1st basemen for 2019 (click or not, but don’t judge me). Rhys Hoskins, the 20th ranked 1st baseman, was about as valuable as the 23rd ranked shortstop (Asdrubal). To make sure we’re not losing perspective, the 20th ranked shortstop was better than the 6th ranked catcher. The catchers were still terrible, don’t get it twisted — sorry, it’s too late for your Mitch Haniger, you need to get it untwisted. Without further Machado, this final ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments.  The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We already went over the top 20 catchers and the top 20 1st basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball.  Today, we dip our big toe into the top 20 2nd basemen pool. In the preseason, 2nd base looked hella deep, and now it looks relatively shallow. Not making this recap, due to disappointing me and/or you, is Jurickson Profar, Matt Carpenter, Robinson Cano, Jonathan Schoop, Daniel Murphy, Brian Dozier, and, last and least, Travis Shaw. Other guys stepped up obviously, but the last six names on this ranking are gonna leave something to desire. To recap this crap (rhyme points!), this final ranking for last year is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Listening to the yearning in Lana Del Rey’s voice calling for easy livin’ in the summertime and longing for the days of every team playing. To ease the hole in my heart, today’s journey through the recaps take us to the 1st basemen. They’re better than the top 20 catchers for 2019 fantasy baseball (not clickbait at all), but by how much? How do I explain that? I have an idea! By recapping them. To recap my recap before the recap, this final ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

*insert musical note* Hello, darkness, my old friend. It’s something-something, me again. So, I don’t know the words. Are you here for musical theory or for a recap of the craziest season in recent memory if one can only remember a year or two? I thought so! Today’s jazz handsy recap is of the catchers. Please don’t ask if this is ranking for next year. It’s not a ranking for next year. It’s me recapping last season. Please, for the love that all is holy, understand this. It’s all I ask of you. Well, that and shower me with praise. The latter isn’t hard, the former is. Also, remembering which is the ‘latter’ and which is the ‘former’ is hard too. Quibbles and semantics, my good man and five lady-mans. It wouldn’t be fair for me to preseason rank the players, then rank them again in the postseason based on my opinion, so these postseason top 20 lists are ranked according to our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. It’s cold hard math, y’all! Anyway, here’s the top 20 catchers for 2019 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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This year the Razzballies are going without a host. I, Grey Albright, Fantasy Master Lothario (don’t abbreviate it) am merely a long-form presenter. Remember, you can’t spell ghosting without host. You also can’t spell hostage, but no one is forcing you to stay for the award show. You’re going to want to, though, because without these awards, you’ll have no idea who was the best and worst hitters and pitchers this year, and you’ll be left giving out your own awards and no one cares if your “Low sodium tomato soup in a sourdough bowl” won your “Whitest Lunch Of All-Tme” award. Stop making up fake awards! For all of you winners and losers, I ask that you please keep your acceptance speeches down to a minimum. As a hero once said, “I’m going to thank everyone in private.” So, before I’m talking to no one but a room full of seat-fillers, here’s the year-end awards for the best and worst of fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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You emerge from mother’s basement, holding your hands up to your eyes to block the sun, and scream, “Ma! I won my fantasy league! Ma!” You stop to look around; it’s a fiery landscape reminiscent to an apocalypse. You open further the basement door, and it falls off its hinges. You, scared, “Ma?” There’s no walls anymore on your house, which gives you a vantage point to the entire surrounding area that smolders. Coming up your once-tree-lined street is a posse of thousands of–An army from another country? Another world? Who are they? What have they done with your family? Just as the questions dissolve over you, a warrior spots you and grunts for you to get in line. You reach for the only weapon you can get your hands on, a Lou Pinella commemorative mini-bat from a 1981 stadium giveaway, and join the post-apocalyptic army. As you scuttle into position behind the marching forces, you see a group of warriors carrying your mother’s head on a pitchfork. Overcome with emotion, you run up and scream, “Ma! I gotta tell you about the fantasy league I won!” In this scenario, I am your mother, and the army is Razzball. You’re welcome! Today is the day when you realize you’ve spent 27,000 man hours this summer beating eleven other strangers to win a virtual trophy, and it feels great! That’s if you won your league, if you came in 2nd or worst, you get an A for effort. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?