Please see our player page for Joey Ortiz to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
by: Grey
Another top prospect was called up, this one was also the star of Webster and used to dunk on Gary Coleman, his name is Emmanuel Lewis. Dick Butkus was his dad and he burned down a house. Let’s hear it for the boy, who is actually a 49-year-old man pretending to be a seven-year-old! [intern […]
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by: Dan Pants
The Brewers asked the baseball world to hold their beers on Friday night while they brewed up a blowout, and switched from pounding beers to pounding the Cincinnati Reds to the tune of a 20-0 shut out on twenty-three hits, and four home runs. This was somehow Milwaukee’s second twenty run shut out this year […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Gavin Williams (7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners (1 BB), 13 Ks, ERA at 3.81) might have the record for most ledes in one calendar year, and he only has a 3.81 ERA! Has any pitcher ever been so good while seeming so bad? Sorry, he’s excellent. Also, he’s got a near-4 ERA? I’m not […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
You know what’s kinda weird? Those earrings that stretch earlobes? I just shuddered thinking about them, but they’re not weird. Eating turkey makes you tired, but turkeys aren’t always sleeping? That’s closer to weird, but not quite what I was going for. They still deliver mail six days a week, in all kinds of terrible […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Saw an open house on RedFin recently of the Rockies’ front office. You enter from the parking lot into the lobby, which was built to resemble a giant ear canal. Then you travel into the main workspace, where the office and personnel is supposed to be and it was designed to appear to be a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Messick, a noun, verb and adjective for when you are calling out to work and can barely speak into the phone. “Hello,” you mutter. You’re a mutterer all right, because you have your hand over the phone, so they don’t hear you’re on a raft in a lazy river at the Great Wolf Lodge while […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?If there’s one universal Cubs’ voice, let’s imagine them singing their version of this old 80’s classic: “You know I love you (you know I love you), you know it’s true (you know it’s true) It’s up to you, Clay, now what have I got to do? Don’t hold me up, Holmes, don’t waste my […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
“I love the smell of napalm in the morning” is a famous quote by Robert Duvall in Apocalypse Now after he started Joe Ryan (4 IP, 8 ER, ERA at 3.38) in his fantasy league. Yeah, Robert Duvall was just sitting there on the river, scrolling on his iPhone and checking his fantasy team. Is […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Yesterday, Cameron Cauley (1-for-3, 2 runs) was called up by the Rangers. This past Sunday Itch just gave you his latest Prospect Stash list and had Cauley as the guy he highlighted. That’s impressive, because I had no idea who Cauley was prior, and Itch predicted it 24 hours prior. It’s a cool parlor trick, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
I don’t listen to Bill Simmons’s podcast and haven’t read anything by him in 20 years, but Reggie Cleveland All-Stars was a top tier, Everest summit contribution to the discourse. For those unfamiliar, the Reggie Cleveland All-Stars are white guys with a Black name. Blaze Alexander is a Reggie Cleveland All-Star. Blazer Alexander? That’s a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
What’s the most annoying thing a teenager can do? I’m going with “I’m not touching you,” when they’re like an inch away from you. Just so annoying. Another top annoying thing? When you’re mad, they know you’re mad, and you say, “No, I’m not mad,” then they say, “Ooh, you’re so mad!” Actually, that might […]
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by: The Great Knoche
The Milwaukee Brewers are in first place 5.5 games up in the NL Central, and sit at 41-23. The Milwaukee Brewers have been really good at taking homegrown pieces from the farm and melding them with yearly trade acquisitions and free agents to keep the roster above average for the better part of a decade. […]
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