…And presenting our next award is Chance the Rapper and Grey the Napper. *I lean into the mic* “Thank you, it’s wonderful to be here. Did you know the inventor of Ping Pong originally named it Fing Fong? Yup, but he had terrible penmanship.” *no one laughs* “Oh, hey, there’s Jeff Daniels. My dad loves you, but calls you Jack Daniels. Then again, I’m not sure he’s talking about you. Anyway, the nominees for our first Teoscar are… Teoscar Hernandez, from years in the minors of 17 homers, 33 steals. Teoscar Hernandez, from the projections of 17/17 for this year. Finally, Tesocar Hernandez, playing a fire emoji in The Emoji Movie, who yesterday went 4-for-6, 2 runs, 4 RBIs, hitting .421, with his 1st homer, while coming a double short of the cycle. And the winner is… *fumbles with envelope* “Wow! Tesocar Hernandez.” “He was the only one nominated, and it’s called the Teoscars.” “Shut up, Chance! You’re ruining the ratings! By the way, to cover the weed smell in your house, you should open a Subway sandwich shop in your living room.” So, obviously Teoscar’s been all that and a swag bag of freebies, and I would grab him in all leagues. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?