“Ree,” opens the front door, walks down the driveway, says hello to my Polish neighbor, Stash, walks to the DQ, gets a Blizzard, eats said Blizzard, walks home, opens the door, says “Dick,” hits the head, not like that, comes back feeling a Blizzard lighter, does some Netflix and chill, shuts it off, says, “You,” brushes teeth, gets into bed, moves arm over Cougs, hears about her splitting headache, rolls over and says, “Lus.” That’s right, in honor of Mookie Betts, I just did the most ridiculous ridiculous call ever. You earned that shizz, you madman! I’d count the ways I love this man, but like a savant Blackjack dealer I can only count up to 21. After his three-homer game yesterday, Betts (3-for-5, 5 RBIs, 10th, 11th, 12th homers) now has those twelve homers to go with eight steals, a .283 average and is on pace for 115 runs and 85 RBIs. Don’t make me do another ridiculous ridiculous call, cause if you want me to, I will. Oh, and with what he’s doing, it’s not even inconceivable that he keeps up this pace. His BABIP (.290) is actually below his career average (he’s getting unlucky!), his fly ball percentage is down (he could be hitting more homers!) and he hasn’t been caught stealing once (so steal more!). You are witnessing the emergence of a perennial first rounder. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?