We’re well into the second half of the season now… are you still with us? You haven’t given up yet? Good. Fantasy baseball is a game of stamina, and if you’re still scouring the waiver wire while others are quickly losing interest or preparing for their fantasy football drafts, now is your chance to make a run. Me? I’m still sore after losing Tanaka. Not to mention Tulo walked out on me when I needed him the most. Regardless, I like to think we’re more than just providers of fantasy advice here at Razzball, we’re also a sound piece for all your fantasy frustrations. I always tell my friend(s)– “don’t ask me how I’m doing, ask me how my team is doing”, because more often than not, that is deciding factor for my mood. So today, feel free to sound off in the comments why you’re so upset with your team right now. Why won’t Harper just hit five homers in a week? Why won’t anyone trade with you? Really Stephen Strasburg? Really!? Why did you draft Justin Verlander and why didn’t you draft Jose Abreu? Here’s your chance to let it all out, because god knows your spouse/significant other/barber/sibling/probation officer/mother/cat doesn’t want to hear about your GD fantasy team. Well, I feel your pain my over-the-internet-friend. And I’m listening.
Here’s what happened in fantasy baseball Friday night:
David Price – 8.0 IP, 8 hits, 3 ER, 10 K and his 11th win. The Price is so right right now, his ERA actually went up after this start. It’s the fourth time this year he’s struck out 10 and walked none. DP also leads the league in strikeouts and his 183/21 K/BB rate (10.06 K/9) is insaneface. Excuse me while I change my pants. (Those would be my Dan Pants, by the way.) His 2.72 xFIP is a career best and he’s won six straight starts with a 1.31 ERA in that stretch. He is the new Cliff Lee. The Pricetag. Cha-ching. We should start calling a David Price strikeout a Price Check.
Jon Lester – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 2 ER, 1 BB, 7 K. He’s trying to get dat Price money.
Shane Victorino – 2-for-4, HR (2), 2 RBI. Victorino has hit pretty well since returning from the DL (.421 in six games). He’s still out there in a little under half of leagues, and I’d give him a whirl if I needed help with runs and average. He’s no Brock Holt, but he could be useful.
Ben Zobrist – 4-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI. Desmond Jennings also went 1-for-3 with a HR (9), 2 runs and 2 RBI. The Rays win their eighth game in a row and it looks like no one is getting traded any time soon. Which is crazy, because if Joe Maddon can win with Kevin Kiermaier and Brandon Guyer batting in the heart of his line up, why not trade all your stars and let’s see how good Maddon really is. Price, Cobb, Longo and Zobrist to Seattle for Justin Smoak, Brad Miller and Erasmo Ramirez. Let’s see you manage your way out of that one, Joe.
Jose Bautista – 3-for-4, 2 HR (19 & 20), 4 RBI. Joey Bats likes to hit his homers in bunches, so I’d expect a couple more Joey Bombs before weeks end.
Mark Buehrle – 3.0 IP, 9 hits, 6 ER, 1 BB, 2 K. Oh boy. That sweet, sweet regression can hurt so, so bad.
Chase Headley – 3-for-4, 2 runs. Going from Petco to Yankee Stadium is like going from hitting cannonballs underwater to hitting wiffle balls on the moon. He’s going to like it in NYC, and not just because of the excellent ethnic food.
Matt Holliday – 3-for-5, HR (9). The Matts went for identical stats lines with Matt Carpenter also going 3-for-5 with his sixth homer. Matt Adams (0-for-5) wanted to know why he wasn’t invited to the party and they told him it’s because the Adams already have their own club and Wainwright wouldn’t let them join. He’s kind of an elitist.
Denard Span – 4-for-5, run, RBI, SB (18). Back-to-back four hit games! That’s…calculating…calculating…calculating…8 hits in two games! Grey told you to BUY him (like a million times) and the Spanimal keeps the hits coming! If I told you in March Span would steal 30-35 bases, bat .300 and lead off for the Nationals all year long you would have drafted him in the top 100 easy, no? Then why is he not yet 100% owned? You don’t have to be a rock scientist to know that kind of stat line is worth owning. It’s sedimentary, ya’ll!
Tanner Roark – 7.0 IP, 3 hits, BB, 1 ER, 6 K and his 10th win. He’s got the eye of the tiger, and we’re gonna hear him Rooooooark! Honestly, who would you rather own, Roark or Strasburg? Honestly? Yeah, still Strasburg. Roark has been excellent though, and is rocking a 2.25 ERA in July with three wins, and his 10 wins lead the Nats. You don’t need to have brain surgery to know he’s been good. Wait, that’s not right.
Alfredo Simon – 4.1 IP, 9 hits, 2 BB, 3 ER, 3 K. Frankly, he was lucky this one wasn’t much worse. Simon says it’s your last chance to sell Alfredo before he really gets sauced.
Grady Sizemore – 3-for-5, 2 runs, RBI, SB (1). Maybe he’s just more comfortable with players more his speed? And by that I mean they use canes, walkers, wheelchairs, etc.
Domonic Brown – 2-for-4, 2-run HR (7), RBI. Every time Dom Brown homers Tehol gets some wings. Buffalo usually. It’s his way of treating himself. It’s been a rough season for Brown owners.
Neftali Feliz – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, 1 K, SV (1). Feliz Navidad! It’s saves on the wire, gift-wrapped like Christmas! Grey told you to BUY and if he’s still out there on waivers grab him quick. Worth noting Neal Cotts pitched the eighth and actually pitched a lot more efficiently than Feliz, but the job is likely Neftali’s to lose.
Jesse Hahn – 6.0 IP, 3 hits, 1 ER, 3 BB, 4 K and his sixth win. The betting line in this one was not too favorable for Jesse pitching in Atlanta, but you never tell Hahn the odds!
Tommy Medica – 4-for-5, RBI. Did somebody call for a doctor? La Medica! La Medica! Tommy is here. He has seven hits in his past two games, and although Yonder Alonso is returning soon, Medica is worth monitoring.
Jose Abreu – 2-for-5, 3-run HR (30). The Grande Dolor! The rook became the first to hit the 30 home run mark last night. Abreu’s the first rookie since Mark McGwire to be the first to 30 homers. Jose’s also got a 16 game hitting streak and 77 RBI, which is second only to the Miggy one. Let us celebrate this event with cigars and mojitos. Or drown our sorrows in them if we don’t own him anywhere.
Dayan Viciedo – 4-for-5, run, RBI. The hamstring injury looks to be behind him and he’s worth an add if you’re dayan for power.
Conor Gillaspie – 2-for-5, RBI. Batting over .300 in the past two weeks Grey told you to BUY him. It’s funny how a player can change from a last resort pick up in May, to an obvious upgrade at the end of the July. That’s why I love this game.
Carlos Santana – 2-for-3, 2 HR (16 & 17), 3 RBI, SB (3). The slam and legs, and double up on the slam, he’s a growing boy. Looking for a good buy before the deadline? Santana has been real Smooth lately. Like Rob Thomas! Matchbox 20. Sing a song–now stop! Carlos has two homers and eight RBI in the past two weeks and his overall batting average has been so miserable you just might be able to pry him away from an owner at a decent price. He’s batting .278 with 5 homers in July.
Billy Butler – 1-for-1, pinch-hit 2-run go-ahead HR (4). I understand now that asking Billy to bat four times a night is a bit much. More sitting + less standing = more home runs.
Yordano Ventura – 6.1 IP, 6 hits, 3 ER, 7 K. Gave up two home runs to Carlos Santana, but otherwise looked much better after last weeks 6 ER stinker. Certainly not the pitcher you drafted way too early in March, he’s looking more like a rookie pitcher who has been a solid add for you since June. His peripherals look pretty good and he gets the Twinkies next week. I’m a buyer.
Zack Wheeler – 6.2 IP, 3 hits, 1 ER, 2 BB, 9 K. The Wheeler in the Sky keeps on turning. Yeesh, when did this guy get so good all of a sudden? Zack hasn’t given up more than one earned run in a start since June 25. He’s got a 1.40 ERA in July with 2 wins and a 26/7 K/BB rate. He’s available in a little under 40% of most league so what are you waiting for, I’m all in on Wheeler, buy before the deadline hits.
Yovani Gallardo – 7.2 IP, 4 hits, 0 ER, 8 K. Nice start, but I don’t trust you at all. I decided to share all my deepest, darkest secrets with Francisco Rodriguez instead.
Francisco Rodriguez – 1.0 IP, 4 hits, 3 ER, 2 K, BS (4). Ack, K-Rod! But you didn’t tell them about “that thing” with my “thing” did you? Did you!?
Carlos Gomez – 2-for-5, HR (15). Is he about to do that thing where he turns it on and becomes the best player in baseball for two weeks? I think he might but where has that thing been the past two months?
Josh Rutledge – 2-for-4, run, 4 RBI. Step back from the Rut-Ledge, my friend, and go pick up Josh! Grey told you to BUY him, and I concur, JR’s got a six game hitting streak with a HR, 6 RBI and 4 runs in that stretch, he also has four multi-hit games in that span. You already know we love JR here at RB, and with Tulo hobbled, now is his time to shine. I would absolutely grab him in leagues where I needed help at middle infielder. Rutty led the way for a Rockies team that scored eight runs last night including a 2-run HR (10) from Carlos Gonzalez. That means everybody gets a taco! But only if you live in the Greater Denver Area, within 5 sq. miles of Coors Field, and also only redeemable at participating Taco Bells within the hours of 11am and 1130 am on Monday, July 28th, with purchase of a large soft drink. Woo-hoo! #freetacos!
Drew Smyly – 5.2 IP, 4 hits, 2 ER, 1 BB, 11 K. That is a smiley face emoticon with a sexually suggestive squiggle coming out of its mouth if I’ve ever seen one.
Tyler Skaggs – 5.2 IP, 5 hits, 1 BB, 1 ER, 5 K. The Lowdown on Skaggs is he is completely unpredictable, but you don’t have to be Miss Cleo to know you probably want no part of him next week versus Baltimore.
Josh Hamilton – 0-for-1. Left the game with knee soreness, but you gotta be surprised he’s been so durable lately so he was due. Efren Navarro (2-for-3, RBI) replaced Hammy, and Josh is considered day-to-day with a menstruating knee.
Miguel Cabrera – 2-for-4, HR (16). Who dat? Who dat? M-I-G-G-Y. That do dat. Do dat. Hitting homers out da park I though you knew dat, knew dat. He is M-I-G-G-Y, put his name in bold! But for seriously, the RBIs are there but just 16 home runs for Miggy ain’t all that Fancy.
Chris Davis – 1-for-4, HR (17). CHRIS THE DISH with the game winner! Nobody calls him that! Can’t complain about the power numbers really. The .200 average though, that you can complain about all you want.
Tim Lincecum – 4.1 IP, 9 hits, 6 ER, 6 K. This once started so well, too, Timmy had six Ks through the first three innings. I guess the effects of his pre-game bong rip started to take hold. Nothing a quick post-game bong rip won’t help you forget.
Zack Greinke – 7.0 IP, 4 hits, BB, 0 ER, 10 K. Did every pitcher strike out 10 yesterday? It’s making Price’s performance less impressive by comparison. Not really though. The Zack Attack struck out four batters in the fourth inning so yeah, it was that kind of day for him, and the Dodgers.
Yasiel Puig – 4-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBI. Puig hit three triples in this one. I think that’s gin! Yasiel did his best Ray Allen impression last night with the three triples as the ManBearPuig returned. Half Man. Half Bear. Half Puig. Half Machine. 200% fantasy BEAST.
Questions? Problems? Complaints? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below, or you can get at me on twitter @dandemanco. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap, as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!