Not much has changed since we last talked. Only A THIRD OF THE BULLPENS have been drastically altered. The Brain Freeze is Slurpee Big Gulp level this week. At least the dust is starting to settle from the flurricane of activity. Exercise some caution on those new openings. Often the less expensive, less glitzy alternative has the same odds to net some saves.
- What to say about the Rays other than Cash gonna Cash. Ryan Sherriff became the latest sheriff of the ninth when he earned a save Wednesday. With such ambiguity and other relievers readying to return from IL let’s not waste any more space on a pen that we can’t predict. Sorry if Sherriff don’t like it.
- The Astros are apparently behind in their Holds league. They’ve consolidated as many bullpens in Highlander fashion as they were able to.
- Dylan Floro has posted two straight saves for the Marlins. The last one was a tad bumpier with a run allowed. Anthony Bender has been utilized as a fireman to get the important outs in the second half of the game. A trend is forming.
- With Josh Hader hitting the COVID-IL for the Brewers both Devin Williams and Brad Boxberger have picked up a save. Expect the team to baby Williams just a little after his first half was less than smooth (mostly related to injury).
- The Cubs haven’t given us a clear front-runner to replace Craig Kimbrel. Kyle Ryan converted the first save and rookie Manuel Rodriguez the next one. Codi Heuer was the return for Kimbrel. Dan Winkler is the low-cost option for a rebuilding team. Let’s see if the front office nudges David Ross in that direction.
- Allow me to take a dig at the Phillies, as they’re my local obligation. How does trading your top pitching prospect for a short-term closer and SP5 make a lick of sense? Yeah, those were the missing pieces to an assured title run. SMDH.
Short term leave
12 $16 Salads
You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.
Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkeycorns.
These guys are the men that make the save market go round. They punch in, punch out. Have the job, no real threat to speak of, and are basically just there to collect great benny’s so they can take care of their crippled brother. Who is only really crippled because he is scared of the sun.
I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Carlos Marmol– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Castro in the head with a pick-off throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.
Tyler Clippard (Brett de Geus)