Yesterday, Joakim Soria lost the closer job yesterday to Aaron Crow. Yeah, and pigeons fly. Wait, they do. Wait II, The Return of Wait, maybe that makes sense. Yeah, I think it does. Thank you, left side of the brain for working with the right side. Glad you’re talking again. You guys rock! The ax falling on The Mexicutioner was a long time coming. He only had one save in May and had given up 7 runs in 9 1/3 IP. He wasn’t much better in April. In June, he could get the job back. Your deity of choice knows that Aaron Crow isn’t really all that great but he is the guy for right now. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Alfonso Soriano – With yesterday’s game with a strained quad. He’ll probably go to the DL by the time you read this, assuming you dinnit stay up to read this at 12:26 AM PST when it was posted. (BTW, Didn’t and I went our separate ways. It’s now dinnit or bust. Don’t, you’re on notice!)
Tony Campana – Yesterday, he had 4 steals (on only one hit!). I’d like to introduce Campana to my right clickie finger that picks players off waivers. In the minors, he showed bonkers speed. Or sponkers, if you enjoy portmanteaus. Not just fast, but crazy. One year, 48 steals in 131 games and 20 times caught stealing. Tony Campana runs like he just sniffed a mountain of coke and killed some cockroaches. With Byrd still recouping, Soriano likely headed to the DL and the Cubs needing a spark plug, I picked up Campana wherever I could. He’s probably nothing but a short term SAGNOF’er, but member what Jason Bourgeois did a month ago? Yeah, you do. Now come here and let me pinch your cheeks!
Kelly Johnson – 4-for-6 and 2 homers yesterday. Now has 4 homers and 6 steals while batting .190– Oh no, he doesn’t. That’s what he had on May 13th when I told you to buy him. He now has 9 homers, 8 steals and raised his average 52 points.
Justin Upton – 5-for-5, 3 runs, 3 RBIs, his 10th home run and 10th steal. I own him in a few leagues, so this is partially selfish of me, but I’d love for him to have his star mitzvah this year. Say 35 homers, 20 steals and a .280 average while becoming a first round draft pick for next year. That would be nice. (BTW, I can neither confirm or deny this, but Vin Scully checked in on the Arizona game and said Justin Upton was 5-for-5 with a home run when Upton was 4-for-4 with no home run. Then Upton hit a home run 15 minutes later.)
Juan Miranda – 0-for-4 while the Diamondbacks scored 15 runs. Ticker tease!
Jose Reyes – Out for 3-7 days with the death of his grandmother. As someone who was raised by their abuelita, I feel for Reyes, but, well, my fantasy team kinda needs him. Oh, man, I’m a bad person.
Ike Davis – Still having pain in his ankle. A Met having an injury setback? That is uber crazy. Yeah, I said uber. Deal with it!
Charlie Morton – 6 IP, 1 ER, 11 baserunners, 4 Ks. Put eleven baserunners in six innings and only one earned run into Fangraphs Database and you get the error message, “Does not compute.”
Brandon Crawford – 1-for-3 with his first steal after hitting a granny in the first game of his career. (That better not had been Jose Reyes’s granny!) He has very, very modest power and speed (like 7/7 over the course of a season). To give you of an idea of how deep the league needs to be to grab him, he’s available in one of my NL-Only leagues.
Eric Patterson – 2-for-5 and has led off two of the last three games! *small voice* But he’s hitting .189. *big voice* He’s stolen 2 bases in those starts! *small voice* He doesn’t play every day. Okay, I’d look at him in NL-Only leagues or deeper leagues for a short term boost on speed. To put it in New Jersey terms, you pass through Patterson, you don’t stay there.
Logan Forsythe – Here’s another NL-Only shout out. He’s playing every day for the Padres, though you’d think if Forsythe was in SoCal, he’d be saying hello to the Angels. He doesn’t have much power and Petco will suppress that further. “Stop smothering me, Petco! I mean, mothering. Actually, I don’t.” Forsythe has five homer power and teen speed. Think a poor man’s Bartlett, i.e. the cupboards are Barelett.
Tim Hudson – 6 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks. Other than the mollywhopping he took at the hands of the Angels, he’s been decent if a bit yawnstipating with Ks.
Mike Napoli – 3-for-6, 5 RBIs and two more homers to bring his total to 10. When he seeks revenge on you for dropping him, he does it swiftly and decisively.
Jayson Nix – Him and brother, Laynce, hit homers yesterday. Today, their brother, Jaymes, drinks himself into a stupor for being the black sheep of the family.
Eric Young Jr. – Another day, another steal. Okay, I’m not talking about him again until Friday’s Buy.
Francisco Liriano – To the DL when the MRI revealed shoulder inflammation. The MRI also revealed it was glad it didn’t draft him.
Phil Hughes – Could be back by July. Yanks said they won’t push him. Put him near traffic and I’ll give him a little shove.
Raul Ibanez – 1-for-3 with his 4th homer in the last week. Frequent commenter, Hans, mentioned Ibanez’s recent hot streak in the comments (appropriate!). I was going to talk about Ibanez yesterday, because he has been crazy hot, it’s just so hard to generate excitement about him and unless you ask, “Between him or Cuddyer,” I’m probably going to say the other guy.
Nick Blackburn – 6 IP, 5 ER. I love corrections to schmohawks. Schadenfreude!
Danny Espinosa – Hit his 8th homer yesterday and has 4 steals on the season. When he ends the season with a .250 average, 20 homers and 10 steals, you’re gonna wonder why you dropped him.
Mike Morse – Another day, another home run. You’re waiting way too long to pick him up. You, “Who me?” Yeah, you.
Jay Bruce – 3-for-4, 3 RBIs with his 16th home run. Could Bruce sneak into the first round next year? Nah, probably not. But he’s moving into the 2nd.
Hanley Ramirez – Out again with what he described as “the worst (pain) he has ever felt.” I betcha there’s quite a few of his fantasy owners that would like to help Hanley continue to break his personal pain threshold record.
Hunter Pence – 3-for-4, 4 runs, 2 RBIs and his 7th home run. Pence is one of those players that stays exactly on pace for his end of the year stats all year long. Minute he starts to fall off pace, he’ll hit a home run or steal a base.
Torii Hunter – 3-for-5, 4 RBIs and two home runs. One for each I.
Mark Trumbo – 2-for-5 with his 2nd home run in as many days. It’s the smart move to keep him in the lineup. Still waiting for the Sciosciapath to make the not smart move.
Fernando Rodney – Got the save yesterday. Walden gave up two runs the day before and threw 37 pitches, so this is probably nothing, but — and unless you’re an alien there’s always a but — I still grabbed Rodney in leagues where I need saves. In May, Walden has a 5.54 ERA, 1.77 WHIP; Rodney hasn’t given up a run in the past week. (Yeah, I’m cherrypicking stats, but whatever. It’s my blog. Start your own blog and cherrypick your own numbers.)
Jon Lester – 5 2/3 IP, 7 ER, 12 baserunners, 4 Ks. I wouldn’t press the panic button, but two of his last three starts have been duds.
Kyle McClellan – 4 IP, 7 ER. See Nick Blackburn or 7 and a 1/4 inches above.
Albert Pujols – 2-for-4 with the ever-tasty slam and legs. A Pujols by any other name would smell foul.
Bartolo Colon – 9 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 6 Ks. A doctor in Boca Raton is claiming he used stem cells to fix Colon’s arm and make him an effective pitcher once again. The doctor says he used Colon’s own fat cells to repair the elbow. Now the elbow is working like new but it can no longer fit into any of his shirts.