It’s everyone’s favorite ‘pert with everyone’s favorite self-flagellating exercise — Hey, look at my team! The ‘Hey, look at my team!’ exercise can go one of two ways. We can either agree that my team is awesome. Or you can combat the ‘Hey, look at my team!’ exercise with your own ‘Hey, look at my team!’ exercise. I’m guessing a lot of you will opt for the second, since the ‘Hey, look at my team!’ exercise seems to go over best from the first person. One word about the “Hey, look at my team!” exercise. It works best if you tell me how many teams are in your league and arrange your team as I have done in this post. Now, prior to you looking at my team, besieging your gut with warm cozies, I first should point out this is a 5×5, 15 team league with OBP subbed in for average because fantasy baseball ‘perts like to make things complicated and turn off 85% of their readers. So, before you say Dan Uggla is a terrible pick, he’s more of a so-so pick. So-so there! Anyway, here’s my 2014 Tout Wars team:
C: Matt Wieters (8)
C: Mike Zunino (17)
1B: Prince Fielder (1)
2B: Jedd Gyorko (6)
3B: Nolan Arenado (13)
SS: Jean Segura (3)
MI: Dan Uggla (21)
CI: Eric Hosmer (4)
OF: Yasiel Puig (2)
OF: Coco Crisp (9)
OF: Torii Hunter (15)
OF: Colby Rasmus (18)
OF: Avisail Garcia (20)
U: Corey Dickerson (23)
Bench: Marcell Ozuna (26)
P: Julio Teheran (5)
P: Alex Cobb (7)
P: Fernando Rodney (10)
P: Tony Cingrani (11)
P: Jim Johnson (12)
P: Rick Porcello (14)
P: Alex Wood (16)
P: Taijuan Walker (19)
P: Alexi Ogando (22)
Bench: Erasmo Ramirez (24)
Bench: Danny Farquhar (25)
Bench: Alex Torres (27)
TOO BAD YOUR OUTFIELD IS GARBAGE, BECAUSE I DO ENJOY YOUR MUSTACHE
Weird thing happened about five rounds into this draft. No, I didn’t see a dolphin fly past my window. Why would you even think that? We got to round 6 and I really didn’t like the next outfielders on the board (remember round 6 for me is around pick 83 overall). I was looking at guys like Cuddyer, Josh Hamilton, Leonys Martin, Shane Victorino, Domonic Brown and Khris Davis (to name the next six outfielders taken). Tell me, guys and four girl readers, would you take Gyorko or one of those outfielders? Actually, no one took any outfielders. Those six outfielders were the last outfielders taken between my pick and my Coco Crisp pick at 128 overall. There is just no outfielders between picks 75-ish to 125-ish. (BTW, here’s the full draft results — yes, there is a direct correlation between knowing fantasy baseball and not computer stuff — a Google Doc, really? Someone couldn’t host it?) If I knew no one would take Teheran (which they probably wouldn’t have), then I could’ve took Yoenis in Round 5, Teheran in Round 6 and winged it from there. For a 15-team league, I don’t hate my outfield, but it is easily my weakest link. That’s if…
YOU REALLY TRUST THAT PITCHING STAFF? YOU CUTE, BUT HELLA CRAZY!
Rudy projected out my team, and said my pitching staff is the weak link. He’s saying that using his projections. According to my projections, my pitching staff is solid. I took a bunch of guys that I love. I think Teheran, Cingrani and Cobb could be three number ones. Sure, there’s risk, but David Price has risk. Gio Gonzalez has risk. Kershaw has risk. Last year, according to our Player Rater, Teheran was the 21st best starter. He’s 23 years old. Sounds like a decent enough fulcrum to balance a staff. I’ve gone over why I love Alex Cobb more times than any metrosexual man should. Let’s say, he butters my Cobb. Wait, what? Ew! Cingrani is pure explosiveness with a 10+ K-rate… Well, you know from my rankings what I think. Yes, the staff is young, but great pitchers are young. One small note, I took Teheran before Cobb in my draft even though I have them reversed in my rankings because where we drafted this (CBS), Teheran was near the top of SPs to draft when I took him and Cobb was buried, so I figured I could wait two rounds before taking Cobb. I figured right, or ‘go figga’ as they say in the hood.
YOU TOOK A BENCH HITTER? OH, NO, YOU DINT!
Yeah, I dit. I say don’t take a bench hitter in leagues shallower than 14 teams. Plus, this is a weekly league. Plus, I’m not sure Corey Dickerson is a full-time player, so I needed a bit of insurance. Bee tee dubya, the Corey Dickerson pick was pure Rudy Gamble. Anyone that has looked at his 15-team rankings (or any amount of teams) knows Steamer loves him some Dickerson. Here’s you, “So, Grey, I love you like a mother chicken loves her baby chicken, but are you following Rudy’s rankings or yours?” First off, this league was OBP, which I don’t project for, so I used Rudy’s. Second, I know how I feel about players, so, like I said above, I drafted a pitching staff I wanted even though I saw Rudy’s rankings in front of me telling me which way he’d go. Third, what third? Stop with your thirds!
