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Please see our player page for Ben Gamel to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

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It’s September call-up season, or SZN if you’re crazy hip. Down like a clown. Fresher than def. Only MLB scaled back the number of call-ups a team can do to make it less obvious teams were manipulating time. (That’s why I think, at least.) So, I debated Corbin Carroll, Gunnar Henderson, or Josh Jung for the lede vs. Keston Hiura. Guess which one I went with. Go ahead, I’ll give you five guesses, if you can’t get it, just be lucky you haven’t accidentally suffocated yourself in your own drool. Any hoo! Time for some pictures! Who doesn’t like pictures? First two pictures are Keston Hiura in 2020 and the 2nd two pictures are Keston Hiura in 2022.

You, “Ooh! Fun! Like one of those games where you have to figure out the difference between two pictures only this one is figuring out the difference between the top two pictures and the bottom two. Oh! I know! That’s a different pitcher! Clever, because it’s two different ‘pictures,’ so you made it different pitchers! You can’t get me! So, if you have no other picture games for me, I’m gonna take a nap…” And, with that, you remove your two glass eyes and place them in two glasses of water. You, “Hope I don’t drink them.” Okay, so what you might’ve missed is Hiura’s 2022 stance is much more closed, and his giant leg kick is reduced. He went from stepping over a dwarf to tip-toeing into the room.  For all hitters — all hitters — Keston Hiura has the best OPS vs. righties when sorting by only 90 plate appearances. That’s insane. He has a better OPS (1.120) than Aaron Judge, Yordan Alvarez, Juan Soto, Bryce Harper– EVERYONE! That’s crazy. His slugging percentage vs. righties is .704, which also leads the league. He’s also apparently hanging out too much with Pollock and can’t hit lefties, which is very odd for a righty, but you just switch him out when he faces those that use the weird scissors. Not exactly a fresh-faced call-up, but you can see why I wanted to highlight Keston Hiura with those pictures. Places glass eyes back in head, “Oh! Those are Keston Hiura?” Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Congratulations readers, if you’re still here and not thinking about football season starting up soon, I can only assume that means you’re still in the running for a fantasy baseball championship. By this point in the season most of the hot waiver names have long since been scooped up so we have to dig a little deeper. Time to turn over a few rocks, shake a few trees, and see who we can find to help you for the season’s home stretch.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Welcome to the first weekend in June, Razzenfants! The months of May and June are always interesting to baseball. The significance and rate of injuries seem to slow or plateau. The players finally seem stretched out and warmed up. You let your guard down, and then BOOM! Two guys on your team need Tommy John […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Who knew the most emblematic song about MJ would’ve been Smooth Criminal? Or going from Pretty Young Thing to Beat It. Or Bad. Jeez, now that I think about it, a lot of Michael Jackson songs become Creep City. Would’ve been hilarious if he named Neverland, “Creep City.” Not haha funny, but more like, “Hey, lots of red flags here, guys, maybe we should investigate?” Speaking of investigating, MJ Melendez (how about that segue?) sounds like a 90s tabloid reporter who would’ve been invited to Neverland to “take a look around” while the help hide children in closets, waiting for Michael. Speaking of segues, I took a Segway tour through Beverly Hills and we stopped at the former Menendez Brothers’ house and the people who now live there just looked at us with disgust. Was pretty cool. Any hoo! Sal Perez is the type to play through all kinds of shizz, so that he was IL’d means he must’ve truly been hurt. MJ Melendez was also up with the club even before the Sal P. IL stint, so the Royals seem committed to him. We don’t care about catchers usually, but Melendez could be a 17-homer, .250 catcher this year with even some steals thrown in. Him or Adley? If both were up, I don’t think Adley’s necessarily the better choice for this year. The guy who is up right now is the easy call. A-B-C, as easy as 1-2-3, for the King of Pop Times. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Minnesota rookie shortstop slash prospect slash phenom slash heartthrob Royce Lewis finally broke out Friday night going 2-for-4 with his first career home run, a mammoth 105.1 mph grand salami! I don’t have to tell you that having your first big league home run be a grand slam foreshadows grandiose things for your future career. […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH.)

Max Meyer has got *palms out, fanning them out in the shape of a rainbow* flash, kid! He’s got a 11+ K/9 in the minors and pinpoint control! Max Meyer has got *palms out, fanning them out in the shape of a rainbow* pizzazz, kid! He’s only six-feet-tall, but he’s got the heart of a gorilla that just took one in the keister for a little kid! Max Meyer *palms out, fanning them out in the shape of a rainbow* is the future, kid! He’s got only two pitches, but, boy, do they sing! Like Ethel Merman in a too-tight brassiere! Max Meyer is *palms out, fanning them out in the shape of a rainbow* stuck behind Elieser Hernandez? C’mon, anyone believe Max Meyer can’t get out from under that cloud of mediocre? He will be called up any day now and, when he is, he could be as good as the Marlins’ 2nd best pitcher, and, for those slow on the uptake, the Marlins have four great pitchers. If you missed out on George Kirby, then Max Meyer is your man. He’s got panache, and I’m not just saying that because I’m pretending to be his agent in 1950. Fix him up with a dame for photos! No one likes a bachelor, see! They wanna imagine themselves with him! In Prospect Itch’s top 25 starting pitcher prospects, Meyer’s been said to have a shot at being an ace-level asset. See, he’s got zing! Also, Prospect Hobbs just gave you his Max Meyer fantasy. We are full-court pressing Meyer, and that’s no bologna! Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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We’ve done it! We’ve reached the end of the fantasy baseball hitter rankings for 2022 fantasy baseball rankings. Give yourself a big round of applause. I’d clap for you, but I have carpal tunnel from actually ranking all the hitters and writing all their blurbs and calculating all of their projections and– What exactly did you do? Oh, yeah, you read them. No wonder why your hands can still clap. Here’s Steamer’s 2022 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2022 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. Subscriptions are up and running, and you can already get Rudy’s Draft War Room. Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2022 fantasy baseball:

NOTE: All 2022 fantasy baseball projections are based on a 162-game season, and will be until we hear definitively there will be less games, due to the CBA. Also, I’m going on the assumption the NL is getting the DH.

NOTE II: All my rankings are currently available on Patreon for the price of a Starbucks coffee, if you get one of those extra grande frappuccino jobbers. Don’t wait for the rankings to come out over the next month, and get them all now.

NOTE III: Free agents are listed as just that and not yet projected. Once a guy signs, I will write out their blurb and add in projections, or remove them, if they sign in an unfavorable place. They are ranked currently where I think they might be if they sign on for a full-time job.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The All-Star game has come and gone, which means the 2nd half is upon us.  During the beginning of this 2nd half, now is a good time to go back and look at anticipated return times for some of the players that have been on the IL since the start of the season.  While the majority have been stored away in the designated IL spots, there are always a few stragglers available for the picking.  Since this is a weekly H2H article, I don’t want to speculate on weeks in the future.  Let me just take this time to give a couple extra pointers to help you gain an edge on your competition.  Hell, the majority of your competition is digging into fantasy football.  Keep grinding Razzball family…Keep Grinding!  

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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You ever think there’s forces larger than ourselves at work? For instance, Taco Bell removes the Mexican Pizza from its menu, but then you’re sitting in traffic, eating nachos off the passenger seat. *screech* You slam on the brakes, and, suddenly, the nachos slide off and crash onto the ground. You frantically pull onto the shoulder, and, as you’re eating the nachos off the floormat, you realize the fall to the ground makes those nachos look like that badly-missed Mexican Pizza. Life gives you what you need. A baseball example:  The White Sox were supposed to be good this year, then they lose everyone from their lineup. One tragedy after another, and Tony La Russa, drunk, just filled in the lineup like, “I’m not going to drive my Mercedes…But I could go for a Burger,” suddenly standing and grabbing his ass, “First I need to take a Sheets.” Yet, they’d still win! Another circumstance that has managed to sort itself out is Rowdy Tellez. He was supposed to be great, but the Jays added player after player this past offseason, and Rowdy was squeezed, which had his Jewish mother say, “Why don’t you get married?” Then, he was traded and now The He’Brewer should get playing time again, and it’s a great park in Milwaukee. There’s a chance Rowdy could be again what we hoped he would be. “A doctor?” No, Rowdy’s Jewish mother. A top 10 1st baseman, if the Brewers, ya know, play him. Why exactly did they trade for him and are not starting him? Oh, that’s right, the Brewers are stupid. Well, if they smarten up, I like Tellez a lot. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The dreidel in Pittsburgh stopped on Gamel yesterday. Ben Gamel went 3-for-5, 6 RBIs and his 6th homer, and his third and fourth homer in his last five games, and there’s no way you’re ever picking up Ben Gamel. Don’t even lie. There’s nothing I could say–Actually, that would make for a good game show. “Which fantasy baseball ‘pert can convince the most people to pick up Ben Gamel?” Then you line up a bunch of balding guys in a mother’s basement, and test their power of persuasion. Can we get Ben Stein to host? Call it Win Ben’s Gamels. Any hoo! Yes, Ben Gamel is about the hottest bat in the majors, but you’re never grabbing him, so let’s do this! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?