DraftKings: Dingers, Dozier, and a Con-Artist

April 7, 2016 | DraftKings, Fantasy Baseball DFS | 2 Comments

We want dingers, lots and lots of dingers. The formal definition of a ‘dinger’ has something to do with home runs, just to paint a better picture for you. We will go after dingers, dingers, and more dingers. Now remember, you don’t want your pitchers to give up dingers, so be careful to not fall too much in love with them. The first Thursday of the MLB season promises plenty of potential for the long ball; sadly, most of the pitchers possess this potential too. With a few lower priced arms, it is possible to put together a very strong hitting lineup that can compete with anyone. Without further ado, we construct Team Dingers, and more importantly a team that will prove a winner on DraftKings for you!

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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#	MLB Starting Lineups For Mon 8/4
	ARI \| ATL \| BAL \| BOS \| CHC \| CIN \| CLE \| COL \| DET \| HOU \| KC \| LAA \| LAD \| MIA \| MIL \| MIN \| NYM \| NYY \| PHI \| PIT \| SD \| SF \| STL \| TB \| TEX \| TOR \| ATH \| CHW \| OAK \| SEA \| WSH

That’s One Tolleson Drink Of Firewater

April 7, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 664 Comments

by: Grey

Yesterday, Shawn Tolleson went zero innings and gave up five earned for the blown save. Why is there blood dripping down the back of my leg? OH GOD, TOLLESON, WHAT HAVE YAO REEKED?! Yao is totally a medieval word for you, by the way. Yao Ming was medieval for “You mean?” Rather popular question in the olden days. Any hoo! Jesus, Tolleson, I wish I owned Jesus Tolleson, the Dominican League 2nd baseman from the Punta Cana Putas, instead of you. That was egregious, my man. At least buy me dinner before touching up my nethers with an iron maiden. Someone tase me so I forget about it. I immediately grabbed Sam Dyson and Keone Kela, wherever I could. It’s not completely clear who would be next, but Dyson has been used as the 8th inning setup man recently, so he’d be my first choice. If Tolleson looks wonky in one more game, he might no longer be the closer. Or as Elvis Costello would say, “Tolleson, I know the M’s are killing you, but my aim for SAGNOF is true.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Sean Manaea, 2016 Fantasy Baseball

April 6, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Prospects | 29 Comments

by: Geoff

Truthfully I never intended to write this post. Over the past few weeks I’ve tried, sometimes unsuccessfully, to plan my content a few weeks out. My original intention was for this 800+ words to cover Bobby Bradley. Why Bradley? Because it ain’t just chicks who dig the longball, it’s fantasy nerds, and prospect geeks too. Then something happened, increasingly over the last several months, Oakland A’s lefty Sean Manaea has become a hot topic of conversation. All of a sudden all the cool kids are talking about him, and wearing his jeans. Manaea couture to be exact. I’ve transitioned. Wait, what? No, not like that! – Not that there’s anything wrong with it – No! not “it” like that…..I’m painting myself into a corner here…..Any the who, I’ve transitioned from writing Manaea off as a hyped up yet oft-injured lefty with devastating stuff, to being intrigued by the possibility of acquiring him in dynasty formats. So this intrigue has led me to a deeper dive into the increasing hype of his prospect status this offseason, and whether it is real or mirage.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Mike Schmidthead

April 6, 2016 | Y to Z | 16 Comments

by: malamoney

The year was 1987. I was ten years old and my biggest hobby was collecting baseball cards. Topps. Fleer. Donruss. You name it. And once Upper Deck was released in 1989, watch out! Hello Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball cards were awesome in the 80s. So were a great many other things, but I’ll save some of those for another post. The excitement of ripping open a pack of baseball cards and the anticipation of finding out who I got in that pack is something that can still get me going today. But back to 1987 for a moment. I was walking with my dad to his car in the parking lot of Matthew’s Diner in Teaneck when I uttered my first curse word in his presence. At the time I was busy trying to complete my set of 7-11 Slurpee baseball coins. You remember those gems? They were underneath a small flap on the bottom of the cup. As you tilted them they’d give the illusion of movement. As if Slurpees weren’t good enough on their own.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Good Advice!

April 6, 2016 | Y to Z | 7 Comments

by: Kenyon Messersmith Sr.

If I were a box of cereal my first ingredient would be “good advice.” Here are some important questions I’ve been asked and my magnificent answers…

Howdy Kenyon! I’m in a six-team mixed league from 1945. Who should I play this weekend? Stan Musial or Pete Gray? – Logan.

Logan: Unless one of the categories in your league is “fewest arms” I’d go with Stan the Man. In the future, you might want to examine the baseball card of the player in question. Simple rule to remember: Rock beats scissors beats paper and two arms beats one arm. Although two arms beats eight arms because octopi stink to high heaven at baseball (despite their lofty reputations as tetherballers).

Please, blog, may I have some more?

DraftKings: Stay Woke For Finnegan’s Wake

April 6, 2016 | DraftKings | 27 Comments

by: Sky

I have no doubt James Joyce would be proud to be mentioned in a Razzball opening, even before his great great nephew Matt Joyce is for this season. What, I shouldn’t assume they’re related? What, I’m showing cultural appropriation? And misogyny? And assuming gender roles that are antiquated according to our day and time?!?! Wow, it really has been a while since I wrote on the Razz. Did we move from wordpress to tumblr? I guess at this point I should reference the book I referenced in the title but I mean, it took James 19 years to actually finish the thing, I ain’t reading that. If you don’t wanna finish it in a reasonable amount of time, I don’t wanna read it. Time is money and all that…speaking of, queue the awkward segue! Let’s talk Brandon Finnegan. When the Cueto trade dropped and the collective dust settled, Finnegan along with John Lamb and Cody Reed were sent to the Reds for some of Cueto’s worst career numbers. Fair trade! But more to the point, B-Fin as I lovingly call him – and will also lovingly call him when he’s straight beefin’ against the Phillies – was considered the prize of said trade and methinks we get to see a glimpse of the why. Other than general expected improvement across the board from the young Phillies team, Brandon shouldn’t be overly matched in his season debut. Though I’d steer clear in cash, Finnegan makes a fine upside K tourney play and at $6,300, he leaves you with plenty of cash to spend up elsewhere, weather permitting (sighs). So to wrap up the opening, don’t read Finnegans Wake, tumblr is full of social justice warriors, and Brandon should have a good day. Use the information that helps you best…and with that we’re off. So let’s get to my Skyline Chili hot takes for this Wednesday DK slate (if Skyline Chili is even hot, I honestly don’t know; it sounds gross)…

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 25 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Some Of My Aaron Sanchez Concerns Have Been Chopped

April 6, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 806 Comments

by: Grey

“It’s an All-Star edition of Chopped! I’m your host, Ted Allen. Let’s meet the competitors. First up, Aaron Sanchez.” *hits fast forward button* “You know, I didn’t think you could put together such a great starter with turkey jerky, kumquats, Mallomars and boxed rice, but this sauce you made is divine.” Alex Guarnaschelli lifts the bowl and slurps. Geoffrey Zakarian, “I thought it could’ve used a bit more spice.” “Okay, GZ.” True Story Alert! My dog’s name is Ted, and the dog walker’s name is Allen, so in my phone I have him listed as Ted Allen. Whenever he calls, I yell out to Cougs, “I finally got on Chopped!” So, I started Aaron Sanchez and he threw a dazzler, 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 8 Ks. His 89th pitch was a 97 MPH fastball. Sign me up for some of that! I grabbed him off waivers in my RCL (no idea why he wasn’t owned), and I plan on starting him every time out, Stream-o-Nator be damned! To keep the runner at first, I’m gonna quick pitch this one. For the cost of four cups of coffee, you get the Stream-o-Nator. To buy stats for all major leaguers that helps the tools run costs us about $8,000. There’s a shizzton of man hours for Rudy to make the tools. A lot of it is a labor of love; we get that. No one is getting rich here; again, it’s all good. I don’t want to pay extra taxes anyway! Now, with that said (here comes a reversal!), I take the Stream-o-Nator with a grain of salt in April. Sample sizes need to grow. Ugh, that’s what she keeps saying! That’s the size of the sample, sweetheart. Please, don’t put me on the DL with a fractured ego. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

One Man’s Trash: The Socratic Question

April 5, 2016 | Uncategorized | 57 Comments

by: Big Magoo

The first major injury of the 2016 MLB season occurred last Friday as spring training was drawing to a close, when Diamondbacks outfielder A.J. Pollock fractured his right elbow sliding into home plate. Why did he decide to slide head first in a meaningless game with a previously sore elbow that kept him out of preseason action for several weeks? Does GM Dave Stewart finally wish that he could rescind his ill-conceived Shelby Miller trade and bring Ender Inciarte back into the fold? Why does it seem like I’m peeing more frequently as I get older? So many questions! However, the most relevant question in this particular situation is: who is the next man up? The most interesting in-house candidate to replace Pollock appears to be 23-year-old prospect Socrates Brito (11.3% owned; +6.1% in the past week). Brito was a candidate to steal some playing time away from Yasmany Tomas in left field, so Pollock’s injury opens up yet another potential path to playing time for the youngster. In a brief stint in MLB last season (34 PA), he managed a .303/.324/.455 triple slash and graded out well defensively, which helps his case to see some at-bats in the near future. In fantasy terms, a decent comp might be Austin Jackson. With regular playing time, a .260/10/20 type of line looks to be in his wheelhouse. There is some upside here, so he’s worth a gamble to grab and stash to see how this situation plays out.

Here are a couple of other interesting adds/drops in fantasy baseball over the past week:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

RCL Update, Week 1: 85 Leagues Under The Razz

April 5, 2016 | Our Leagues | 26 Comments

by: MattTruss

That’s a wrap on the 2016 Razzball Commenters League fantasy baseball draft season. You can close out of spreadsheets and stop worrying about whether or not you should handcuff Ken Giles with Luke Gregerson (Yes, yes you should have). What’s done is done and now it’s time to prep for the daily grind that is an RCL league. So, grab your caffeine ingestion method of choice and start researching tomorrow’s batty calls.

This week, we’re going to take a look at all the draft data that all of you contributed to our leagues. We span from drafts the morning of February 28th all the way until this past Sunday afternoon. That’s just over a month of draft data to break down, dissect and tear apart. Next week, we’ll be able to focus things on you all as we’ll have a week’s worth of stats to ponder. Without further ado, let’s dig into how the RCLers drafted this year.

First of all, here is the ADP spreadsheet, all finalized for your viewing pleasure. Feel free to keep that open as you read along…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

DraftKings: The Anti-Jerome (Bettis)

April 5, 2016 | DraftKings | 5 Comments

by: AskRotoBaseball

Did you know that Rockies starter Chad Bettis is the only major league player in history with the last name Bettis? That means he’s the best Bettis, but he’s also the worst. What a claim to fame. The most famous Bettis of all time is NFL Hall of Famer and former Pittsburgh Steelers beast, Jerome Bettis. Here is something you already know: Chad ain’t Jerome. Hell, Chad doesn’t even play football. Does Chad have a restaurant in the town where he made most of his money? I didn’t think so. Anyway, we are talking about baseball since, you know, this is only Day 3 of the 2016 season. I love early season exploitation and that’s really what this is all about. Chad Bettis is the Colorado Rockies’ number two starter. His career ERA is 5.22. Just ponder that for a couple of moments. Do you see dollar signs yet? This is my first article here at Razzball and I’m happy to be aboard. At the end of the day it’s all about the Benjamin’s, baby. So let’s dog pile on Chad Bettis and kick off the first Tuesday of the season by being ballers and shot-callers. We deserve it.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Podcast: “You’re Working Your Way Onto My RIGHT Hand!”

April 5, 2016 | All Podcasts | 2 Comments

by: JB Gilpin

The season is here, the season is here! Man, it’s great having baseball back, and on today’s show Grey and I chat about some of the first goings ons including some great opening day K performances and how I’m officially calling his Robinson Cano hatred wrong. Small sample my ass! Grey talks about how he likes friggin’ Zack Cozart after one game! We then check in with Rudy and talk his Yahoo Friends & Family draft (I of course ask what Grey said in the chat room when he got Albert Pujols in the 9th round) and the Razzball Tools to help you win your season-long leagues and some DFS skrillah. Cash money babay, cash money! I really am the whitest person you’ll ever meet… Then Grey and I talk about our RCL ‘Perty ‘Perts league, where Grey gets mad at J-FOH for all his sniping. Nice work, Jack full of Awesomesauce! That sounded weird… And finally we go through our 2016 predictions and Razzball Staff Picks, where somehow, without any consultation, we found out J-FOH and I made the exact same AL/NL Cy Young and MVP picks. We’re long lost twins! Except, ya know, other than being tall we’re years apart and never met in person… It’s time for a parent trap! Here’s our latest edition of the Razzball Baseball Podcast:

Download from iTunes

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Astros Choose Luke Over The Force

April 5, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 513 Comments

by: Grey

*takes a long inhale* “You smell that, Roberta? You, with the yellow-stained armpits and sweatpants, I’m calling you Roberta. That’s baseball you smell. In its infinite complexity and finite simplicity. The foul lines whiter than any Lohan mirror. The grass? Manicured better than any Vietnamese lady could. The object of the game? Accumulate the most stats so I win my fantasy league. Simple, yet complex. Like trying to understand Jeff Foxworthy’s appeal. From today forward, this is our Independence Day (from all that other shizz in our life).” The preceding was Bill Pullman visiting the set of Field of Dreams. To that end, Roberta and your long-flowing sideburns, if the idea is to win saves, that difficulty intensifies when you draft Ken Giles and Luke Gregerson becomes the closer. That’s funny, because the Astros beat writer the other day said GILES IS THE CLOSER. Caps his, not mine. I know how to shut off my caps lock. So, now that GILES IS THE SETUP MAN, I would GRAB Gregerson in EVERY league, though, if it’s competitive, he’s likely GONE by NOW. No idea why Giles is NOT the CLOSER. My GUESS is the Astros went OUT and GOT Giles withOUT their manager, A.J. Hinch, agreeing, so Hinch IS now BEING petulANT. I’d prefer if he were petulANT with A closER I DO NOT OWN. Hey, it looks like I’m typing this on a busted Smith-Corona. Fun. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?