I hope everyone had a fun second week.  There was some good, like Mark Trumbo going double dong in one inning.  There was also some bad, like whatever it is Matt Harvey is doing.  Trevor Story didn’t hit a homer every single day this week, easing the pain for those of us that don’t own this middle infield monster.  Everyone can breathe a sigh of relief as just about everyone that should have a home run has hit one by now, even Mike Trout!

It’s the silly season for our leagues at this point  We can see huge swings in the standings based on 2-3 good days of stats.  We have a new top team on the RCL leaderboard and they had one of those silly gains to get there, gaining 25 points in 7 days time.  Not bad for a frequent commenter, occasional contributor and long time Razzballer.  Despite that enormous gain, they aren’t even this week’s team of the week.  I’m sure the suspense is killing you, so come on down after the jump and check out the week that was…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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See all of today’s starting lineups

# MLB Starting Lineups For Thu 8/7
ATH | ATL | CHW | CIN | MIA | PIT | SEA | WSH | ARI | BAL | BOS | CHC | CLE | COL | DET | HOU | KC | LAA | LAD | MIL | MIN | NYM | NYY | OAK | PHI | SD | SF | STL | TB | TEX | TOR

You know, it’s been a rough week for Astros stud Carlos Correa. He’s batting .227 over his last seven games and hasn’t hit a home run since April 6. On top of that, he’s only making $516,700. Former elite shortstop and now DH for the Yankees, Alex Rodriguez, is making $21 million this season. Talk about income inequality. Anyway, when it’s all said and done, Correa has a real chance to earn more over the length of his career than A-Rod. He’s not just an up-and-coming player, he’s a total stud. Sometimes a day of rest is all you need to snap out of a funk. Correa got that rest on Sunday and now he’s ready to get back to business against a guy with the worst mustache in Texas, Derek Holland, who he just so happens to be 4-for-5 lifetime against with two homers. Can you taste that cheddar? Take advantage of Correa’s reasonable price tag like you take advantage of an open bar at your cousin’s wedding. The drought is over–everyone is drinking tonight.

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Now punchier! On today’s edition of the Razzball Pod we talk big performances from the last week including Aaron Sanchez moving forward, if Matt Moore can contain his control, and Jose Altuve‘s ridiculous start. Shocker – Grey has been happy with what he’s gotten from Altuve so far! We then play America’s favorite game: Ben Revere or Denard Span?! We use them to rank some fringy OF and how they can fit your needs. Then we wrap going into an NL-only abyss and alienate 99% of our listeners… Hey, deep leagues are leagues too! Here’s our latest edition of the Razzball Baseball Podcast:

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Well, that sucked.  It was extra sucky too because I had high hopes for Carlos Rodon‘s start vs. the lifeless Angels.  Like eating Chinese food by yourself and accidentally getting two fortune cookies, then you open them and they both say the same thing, “The highlight of your night will be getting two fortune cookies with the same fortune.”  Like going to the car wash and they give you a deal due to an impending rainstorm.  Only it never rains, false alarm.  But you did forget to put up your window.  Like your parents reconcile their differences, just to yell at you.  Rodon, it’s one thing to disappoint, but to raise expectations first?  Oh man, you are one evil doode with a heart as cold as Clint Hurdle who has a serious attraction to Freese.  Yesterday, Rodon went 1/3 IP, 5 ER with one strikeout.  On the bright side, he upped his K-rate.  “Don’t mock bright sides or I will burn you.”  That’s the vengeful sun.  Rodon had ten straight quality starts, and, unless he’s hurt, we should just treat this as an aberration.  A sick, twisted aberration.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Grey beat me with the parallel to the other Aaron Sanchez, so I’ve got to cook up something different! …dammit.

As I mentioned in my first in-season re-ranks last week, I mentioned I always liked [the real] Aaron Sanchez‘s stuff and had some of my worst early-season regret not ranking him higher. But after that sizzling (…crap) debut, 5 K and 3 BB against the Yankees in his second course (…ahhhh!). It was still a quality start, but if he keeps walking guys, he’ll be a recipe for disaster (…OK, I’m done).

While it’s still too early to make blanket judgment calls, it’s nice to start having 3-game samples on starters as we head into week 3. Sanchez is likely owned in most mixed leagues, but in the RCLs where the name of the game is streaming, I wanted to see how “must-hold” he is in formats where starting pitchers are cycled in-and-out more than sex jokes in Two Broke Girls. Oh my god, have you seen that show?! Wife loves it, but it’s written by 12-yr-olds who giggle during sex ed class in middle school! Speaking of: “boobies”. Tee-hee! Wow, this got way off track. One of the more interesting starters going on Sunday afternoon, I decided to break down Sanchez’s third start on the young season to see how his command is maturing (hopefully maturing faster than I am…):

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Now, before you grammar police start kicking down my door, just slow down. This English Major knows what he’s doing. That little title up there is what we call intentional, or better yet, a play on words.

Creeper of the Week? How about ‘Ashamed of the Past Three Years and Source of Rage for Fantasy Owners and Atlanta Fans Alike?’ Too long? Too accurate? No, that’s a pretty accurate banner. As a Braves fan I really do feel like I’m channeling my inner-J-FOH. And if you’re still struggling to identify the culprit of said rage, the following interaction with a friend of mine reveals the answer in the most eloquent way possible:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Crank up that AC/DC and let’s get this party started! Oh and in case you haven’t heard Axl Rose will be joining AC/DC as Brian Johnson will be stepping down due to hearing loss. Bittersweet as I loved me some BJ, but it should be fun to see Axl and Angus rock the stage. Nothing gets the Monday morning juices flowing like AC/DC and seeing Thor on the slate, especially with the rest of sub-par starting pitching options for today. Who is this Thor I speak of (rhetorical, unless you stumbled upon us through some sort of comic con accident). The Thor, I speak of is Noah Syndergaard, the highest priced pitcher today at $12,100. Thor had some big expectations coming into the season, but lets face it, living up to the Norse God of Thunder seemed like an even bigger task. Well in his first two games he’s exceeded those expectations, by absolutely dropping the hammer on opposing batters with 21 K’s, 1ER, 2 BB over the last 13 innings. Last season when he was called up he showed that dominate +95 MPH fastball, 99 MPH sinker and 90 MPH change up that actually danced. That’s a lethal combination, especially when you add in his physical attributes, he only stands 6’6″ and weighs 240 lbs (he’s probably closer to 255, cause dude is jacked) He’s got the nickname, the hair, the body and did I mention that he added a 95 MPH slider to his arsenal? His power pitches were already dominating hitters and now he added this nasty slider that is making him miss even more bats. Thor is not without his flaws as it looked like Miami may have found a small chink in the armor. They got him for 7 hits on Tuesday, but most of those were because they were all swinging on the first pitch, the second and third time through the order. If he can be a little more elusive on the first pitch, we may see an out of this universe season from this stud. If anyone is looking to shower the staff here at Razzball with gifts, I’d like to put my request in for this little New York Mets give away on 4/30 Thor Garden Gnome. With the pitching slate extremely thin today, Thor and Jose Fernandez, $11,300 will be highly rostered, so let’s dive into two other guys who might help us cash in.

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As George Bush Jr. once said, “Fool me once, shame on you, you can’t fool me again because we won’t get fooled again,” then he was joined by Pete Townshend in a duet that made sense at the time, but now seems inconceivable.  GB was right on, and that’s how I initially felt about Matt Moore.  How many times could we be fooled by this guy?  What’s that?  Twelve?  I was asking that rhetorically, I didn’t want a number.  Why did you just say thirteen?  I don’t want a number!  Whether it is twelve, thirteen or one time fooled, it doesn’t *pinkie to mouth* Matt-er.  Yesterday, Moore went 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners with 10 Ks.  He now has a 10.3 K/9 and a 1.5 BB/9.  That walk rate, I mean muah.  That with a 8 K/9 would have me interested.  With a 10+ K/9?  Yes, please and thank you, to get politely excited.  On a related note, not sure how this happened, but I have an abundance of AL East pitchers in different leagues.  Great, terrific, adjective, except when they face New York, Boston and Toronto, which is basically every game.  FMFBBL!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Two weeks down in the baseball season. Only 24 left to play. I miss Bauer. Not Trevor but Jack. Why do some shows have to end? I mean, Hollywood doesn’t have a problem milking the crap out of other garbage. Excuse my French, but C’mon man! Anyways, the point I was trying to make before I took a trip down nostalgia lane was that there’s a lot of baseball games to be played. The sample sizes are small. You all know what Grey would say. With that said, mining the waiver wire and taking advantage of the emotionally unstable will help you say the most beautiful sounding word in the English language.

In this weekly column, I will highlight some players that performed well over the past week and give my insights on them. Making it rain is good. Whammies are… well, they will make you feel like this.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Just a few years back, I used to followed weekly blogs that would similarly give me weekly start em’, sit em’ recommendations such as this. And then my ego took over. “Why the hell should I listen to this guy?!” “What does he know anyway?!”I remember getting absolutely furious when a suggested stream would go bad and have a nerdy “expert” as my scapegoat. I mean, c’mon, isn’t it always fun to blame the nerd? So why should you listen to me and trust me with your lineup? Well, you don’t have to if you don’t want to. But in order to gain some credibility and hopefully your trust, I am going to track my weekly stats to show you how bad or good my suggestions have been for your OBP leagues.

Here are the results after Week 1:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I can imagine what Juan Nicasio season long owners are feeling right now. First week was straight gravy with some poutine hiding underneath. Next week? Heart attack with a cliffhanger heading into week 3. This shizz is like Knots Landing and I don’t even know what that show is! Either way, drama central is going on and we out here in DFS land be like okay, okay, Childish Gambino style. That’s the beauty of the Daily Fantasy life: No Ragrets. Or better put, no memory. I don’t care that Juan was terrible in his last start. It happened in Detroit against a stacked Tigers lineup. Back at home in the NL against a good but shaky Brew Crew lineup, I’m willing to take a gamble on Juan at his low end price of $6,100. Why? Pitchers that Ray Searage has salvaged include but are not limited to: AJ Burnett, Francisco Liriano, and JA Happ. So you can write the other two off as bouncebacks but Happ? That’s straight voodoo magic, brosephs, and I’m not about to start a Salem witch trial against this good man. So step into my humble abode as we put Juan in our SP2 spot and forget about it for the day. But what should we do with our SP1 spot, you ask? Well read on. Here’s my telenovela hot taeks for this Sunday DK slate…

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

On any given Wednesday or Sunday I’m peppered with comments inquiring as to when so and so will be up? Who’s the best stash of players X, Y, and Z? Should I grab so and so? Are you really as handsome and charismatic as the legend says? Did we really walk on the moon? Today I will bring answers to all these questions. Even the moon one! Why pray tell do I have all the answers? Well, because I am a fantasy baseball writer, it’s in our very nature to know everything even if it’s 100% opinion, and more than likely completely false. My job is to make a compelling argument as to why I am most righteous and you are most wrongous. Will I do any of that today? No, absolutely not. Today I will begin my first in a monthly series of updating you on the latest and greatest in minor league news and prospects developments, as well as the update of my Top 25 prospects. This time with 100% less major leaguers.

Please, blog, may I have some more?