Imagine a world without Greg Holland. Okay, got it… because it’s here… sorta. There would be no tulip or windmill jokes and Wade Davis would basically be the freaking mac. I was interested to see what his numbers really were, since he basically became a full time reliever towards the end of the 2013 season, and up to this date thus far in the season. So over the 89 innings of relief work, he has allowed 42 hits, 9 ER, and K/BB rate of 124/28. I don’t curse very often, but holy sh*t. The best thing about him is that he doesn’t have to be all-pressured to be the closer if he doesn’t want to. Kinda like the cool kids in school, they sometime bring books to class or they just punch a juke box and say words that word normally sound like a euphemism for IBS. I am by no means wishing Greg an injury-riddled year because, irregardless, Wade is going to do what he do. He is far and away the most important reliever in baseball, argue that if you want… you will lose, but it’s fun to argue. Enjoy the week’s closer updates and rankings…
- What is wrong with Mark Melancon? That seems to be a popular question I am fielding around the way. His velocity is down and his release point is way off. He has notoriously, throughout his career, been a slow starter, but the drop in velocity and pitch technique is a real worry sign. He just got the proverbial pat on the back from his skipper, which is basically a kiss of death. If he gets removed, I see it as anyone’s game there with Tony Watson, Jared Hughes and the second best name ever Arquimedes Caminero all looking like possibilities in a rotating situation. For those inquiring, Rusty Kuntz is the first all-time name.
- My preseason love for Brad Boxberger has not disappointed. The unfortunate thing for that is every prom king has to give his crown back, hence the freeze tag still. He doesn’t deserve it, but with McGee in rehab and his return prolly a week to 10 days away, it is time to start hoping for saves now and looking elsewhere for quantity later. He is not a drop though as he’s still a ratio booster and is that great first BP arm that you use on a daily basis.
- It is becoming a Dick Gregory type buffet at the salad department. As the group is down to two members for the moment.
- Happy trails Joe Nathan. Anyone wanna put a number on his career saves from this point on? 10 O/U?
- I know it’s extremely early, but is anyone else noticing that the Nationals bullpen is pretty meh? With extra emphasis on mmmm and a little side eye towards eh. They lead the league in blown saves. in fact they have more blown saves then both New York teams, STL, Tampa, Texas, White Sox, Philly, Milwaukee and the Giants combined. I am not saying there is a panic session going down at the Capitol Grill, but for a team that has the markings of contender it’s a lot a sloppy.
You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.
Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkeycorns.
13. Koji Uehara – (Edward Mujica, Junichi Tazawa)
These guys are the men that make the save market go round. They punch in, punch out. Have the job, no real threat to speak of, and are basically just there to collect great benny’s so they can take care of their crippled brother. Who is only really crippled because he is scared of the sun.
I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Carlos Marmol– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Castro in the head with a pick-off throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.