Yaisel Puig‘s home runs are so effortless they’re like Billie Jean King and Billy Dee Williams only needing to say, “40-love?” to hook up with a girl in the 70s.
Somewhere, Ashton Kutcher is struggling to come off as smart. He is exerting more energy than Yasiel Puig on his home runs. When Yasiel Puig is in El Zono Loco, pitchers should be chicken. When Puig is locked in, he looks as good as all the Cuban graphic novels that were written about him in Fidelphia. Of course, just as quickly as Puig gets everyone’s hopes up, he collapses under his own hype. He’s a (ba)con artist? I’d absolutely own Puig right now that he has three homers in two games (2-for-3, 3 runs, 4 RBIs and a double slam (3) and legs (1) yesterday), but I wouldn’t be surprised if by May he’s back to disappointing. (By the way, the pitch speed on that homer is 78 MPH. HAHAHAHAHAHA– Oh my God, I can’t breathe! Member that old timey film of Bob Feller throwing faster than a speeding motorcycle? They should have Weaver go against a speed-walking senior citizen.) Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Drew Storen
Bullpen Report: 2017 Holds Rankings
March 3, 2017 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 58 Commentsby: Smokey
A funny thing happened on my way to work today, I sat there in my favorite sitting place and did some research. I looked at the availability of information provided by the other experts in the world of fantasy baseball, and then correlated that to what I do best. That, my friends, is bullpens. We as a collective fantasy universe play in leagues with the illusive yet sultry stat category known as the Hold. In fact, in some further research that I have done, an estimated 30% of all fantasy players play in a league with some sort of Hold associated with the final outcome in the standings. I mean, 30% is basically like winning the popular vote. [Jay’s Note: I love you Smokey.] But I am standing here aghast at the amount of research poured into this fantasy industry by experts all around the world, yet here I sit. Giving you the most diverse, in-depth, informative (yet funny), and groundbreaking stat analysis that not even world-wide leaders give… for free might I add. I love me some bullpens, and if you don’t play in a league that adds diversity to the game to include them, then maybe you should down shift a bit and give it some thought and do a league that includes it. Don’t do it for me, do it for yourself. Because this way I gain, at least one reader from each person that does it. Go search the inter-webs for holds type information, you get a column sorted catastrophe written by some intern who doesn’t know the difference between good and well. So stay here my friends, I am the goods through and through. I dropped the Holds chart weeks ago and now you get just straight cheddar and some rankings.
Please, blog, may I have some more? Closer Report, Preseason: A Committee Of Known Unknowns
January 27, 2017 | Closers, Middle Relievers, SAGNOF | 56 Commentsby: Smokey
That is probably the worst word when it comes to drafting or even trusting in a reliever in a bullpen for fantasy. The guy could be a tax evader, steal lollipops from kids, or never wash his hands after using the lavatory. It still wouldn’t matter, the stigma of being placed into a committee is just awful come draft day. This happens every year when bullpens usually light on talent get paired down to barely usable pieces, or when players return from injury and are an unsure thing. Then again, you get a weird situation like that in Cleveland… It’s very familiar to last year’s draft day conundrum with that of the Yankees. Both Cody Allen and Andrew Miller are draftable and draft worthy within the first 150 picks or so. That number increases for players in “Net Saves” and Holds leagues, because they will steal from each other but on the positive end, one will get a hold and the other the save, and vice versa. The only problem is that Cleveland, after being in the World Series, is a hot button team and both players have some helium to their names, Miller especially. So drafting both is a good idea, stats-wise, but bad for team building it’s structure in other areas. So my best advice is to look elsewhere, yes the stealing thing I mentioned helps you in leagues that contain Holds, but in leagues that don’t, it could be a sticky situation of frustration over saves. Last year down the stretch, Miller wasn’t the closer very frequently. Allen steered that ship. This year, I think the secondary stats: K’s, ERA, WHIP, will all be there, but the counting stats will be split. And since I talk about saves and holds, I am most definitely referencing the saves here. So with their respective rankings spread between 100-130 for both guys, I think the best offense, or with a committee situation, is to grab someone ranked in same neighborhood guys like Ken Giles and Kelvin Herrera. You may thank me later, but I do occasionally deserve the bird. So instead of just going into the rankings this far into preseason, here is a cool little chart for you to reference. I will update this chart all preseason and will add some sleeper posts for both closers and holds. So enjoy my friends!
Please, blog, may I have some more?
All The A’s Are Down And This Guy Is Gray
May 23, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 731 Commentsby: Grey
Yesterday, Sonny Gray hit the Disgraceful List with a combination of ineffectiveness and Grey calling him a preseason schmohawk. My schmohawks: Schwarber, Pollock, Gray, Tulo and Sano. If I were Sano, I’d move into the giant bubble that Tulo is apparently living in to still be healthy. Seriously, if you were placing odds in the preseason on which one of those would hit the DL, Tulo would be 10 to 1 odds as the first one; Pollock likely 2nd since he was nursing an elbow issue in the preseason; third would be Schwarber because he was playing a position he had no business playing and bound to run into a wall; finally, Gray because I put the kavorka on my namelganger, which is a magic spell so hideous that no amount of Creoles with an unlimited supply of chickens to sacrifice could reverse that hex. By the by, everything I know of Creole black magic I learned from Angel Heart. Gray has a 6+ ERA, so you can DL him if you have room, but I could see just dropping him if you don’t. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? Bullpen Report, Week 4 – SouthSide Sawx
April 29, 2016 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 38 Commentsby: Smokey
When looking at the standings, it is usually a great indicator of how well a team is doing by looking at the Hold leaders. It doesn’t tell you all or is the end all be all of indicators, but when you have three guys in the top-4, it speaks volumes. It shows the team is ahead, but not by so much that they are blowing people out, have a great set of flow through the bullpen with set jobs, and they are successfully in-sync. Not that “in-sync”, but yeah, sorta because something that included J.T. can’t really be all that bad. So what is making the Chicago White Sox so good at what they are doing right now? First, it starts from the last inning back. David Robertson has the goods of what you want from a closer, he has the K-rate and decent control to limit base runners. What I am noticing is he is keeping the ball away from the upper part of the zone, which was his buga-boo from the past; that he gives up too many homers. In front of him, he has a trio of relievers with different mindsets. Nate Jones is basically a closer in front of the real closer, but with a better approach of pitching to contract then K’ing everyone. Zach Duke is by far the sexiest LOOGY in the business right now and Matt Albers is an all effort pitcher with tons of movement on his pitches. Add in the fact that they have Putnam and Petricka as sub pieces that can fit into anyone’s role, and they have what looks like in the early stages of the season the best bullpen in baseball. That is not to say that it will last but the investment level from a fantasy level, especially from a holds league, but it is very stout. So check out the other tidbits and bits tids that I have for you after the bump. (Plus a chart that monitors usage and runs given up by relievers that usually lead to them losing or gaining spots in the pen.)
Please, blog, may I have some more? Carlos Rodon The Wall And Left His Mark On My ERA
April 19, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 758 Commentsby: Grey
Well, that sucked. It was extra sucky too because I had high hopes for Carlos Rodon‘s start vs. the lifeless Angels. Like eating Chinese food by yourself and accidentally getting two fortune cookies, then you open them and they both say the same thing, “The highlight of your night will be getting two fortune cookies with the same fortune.” Like going to the car wash and they give you a deal due to an impending rainstorm. Only it never rains, false alarm. But you did forget to put up your window. Like your parents reconcile their differences, just to yell at you. Rodon, it’s one thing to disappoint, but to raise expectations first? Oh man, you are one evil doode with a heart as cold as Clint Hurdle who has a serious attraction to Freese. Yesterday, Rodon went 1/3 IP, 5 ER with one strikeout. On the bright side, he upped his K-rate. “Don’t mock bright sides or I will burn you.” That’s the vengeful sun. Rodon had ten straight quality starts, and, unless he’s hurt, we should just treat this as an aberration. A sick, twisted aberration. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? Bullpen Report, Week 2 – Early Usage, Builds Trends
April 15, 2016 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 61 Commentsby: Smokey
As much as I love publishing and giving you the “haps” on the closer ranks, I love the depth that a bullpen can give you and how it can affect your roster. It is way to early to look into my Grafix crystal ball and say this guy and that one will be the crowned prince of the hold this year… to some degree. Early usage and situations prove a lot. Yes, injuries happen, and ineffective spells happen, and sometimes trades happen, but if you were good enough to make the team out of Spring, then usually you are good enough to make yourself an established piece of the bullpen. The top names are still the top names. The cream either rises to the top or it rules everything around me, both perspectives are interesting because how can you not believe the Wu or old school rhetoric. So with the first bullpen piece of the year, we will cover all the same things you are accustomed to from last year as I get more in-depth than anyone else when it comes to holds. Some don’t care or are on the fence, as if it’s a completely comical or made up stat. It is no more made up then saves, because that is exactly what it is, just before the save… so it is basically a pre-save. Either way, I care and will give you some early trends to look at and some names to go with it. Trends rule everything around bullpens or TREAB, dolla dolla bill y’all.
Please, blog, may I have some more?I’ve drafted my Razzball Commenter League team (last call for fantasy baseball — I’m saying that so it rhymes with alcohol), and now I’m ready for the season. All those other drafts — like Tout, Friends & Family, Scout, yadda-whodoodie — are in the past. They were prep for this draft. This draft is the one that matters, because I’m going against, like, a thousand of youse. And youse are the ones that matter. Well, a few of youse matter more than a few of the other youse. Just assume you are part of the favorable youse. In this league was Tim McLeod from RotoRob, Mike Gianella from Baseball Prospectus, Dalton Del Don from Yahoo, and from Razzball: Rudy, JayWrong, Big Magoo, Smokey, J-FoH, Tehol, Prospector Ralph, JB and yours truly. All of these people make me very thankful (that it wasn’t an in-person draft). I was drafting out of the twelve-hole (which is porn-speak for the right nostril), and I knew after all those preliminary drafts that I was finally going to take guys that I really, really wanted from my 2016 fantasy baseball rankings (clickbait, snitches!). Well, until around the 5th round, then shizz went to hell. Okay, enough hubbub on the tomfoolery, let’s get to it! Anyway, here’s my RCL draft (5×5, roto, mixed league, 12 team, 5 OFs, etc.):
Please, blog, may I have some more? Closer Report: Final Spring Training Edition
March 25, 2016 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 72 Commentsby: Smokey
With the baseball season starting in the blink of seven-days-eyes, I figured it would be fitting since we all crunch drafts ’til the last possible moment. Waiting until the end isn’t always a bad idea, you get the last news possible on injuries and job security. Bad thing is that you lose some of the sleeper appeal. By now, if you haven’t heard of a guy who could be closing, there is a great possibility that he doesn’t have a Sam Hill’s chance of closing. Just facts. These guys aren’t born yesterday and matriculate with a mastery of three pitches overnight. The bullpen folk have one job and that is to make a save situation stay a save situation. This holds true for holds guys, pun semi-intended. So the list is basically where it should be until we start seeing some production from the lads. The committee situations that exist in Milwaukee and possibly Philly will be that until someone gets the bulk of the load on his back. Which sounds gross, but from a fantasy perspective, you want a full orgy of saves on your closer. After all, quantity is the name of the game, that and continued success at it. It is like everyone else’s job; you do good you stay. You do poorly, you get pink slipped and sent to middle relief-dom. So fingers crossed, or if you play the cuff odds, just simply uncross them and pray for the worst. Here is the last rankings of Closers and their hand-cuffs for the start of fantasy baseball version, 2.016…
Please, blog, may I have some more? Bullpen Report: The NSVH Conundrum
March 18, 2016 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 56 Commentsby: Smokey
No, you haven’t stumbled onto a WebMd bait page. Well… this is an advisory blog, none the same, but we won’t scare you into believing that you have clinical depression with every symptom. I mean, I’ve seen some other fantasy sites that attempt to advise on bullpen strategy. It’s easy to throw stuff up about closers and bullpens and say this guy will fail because of this and that. Heck, I like watching Jeopardy and guessing at the stuff I don’t know about either. Add in the fact that I remember my first beer… So this is one of the last pieces of the fantasy bullpen puzzle before we get down to brass tacks. The NSVH question… I always get it from the fantasy inspectors of the net of how and what to do about it. Do I stick with what I know, or do I go complete rover and draft whatever, whenever? That’s why I am here, hopefully to quell all ills in the race for bullpen dominance. The NSVH leagues are tricky and can be described as: people don’t know until they have to know. I know that really isn’t a draft strategy that I am going to “learn” you with this post, since I am better than that and take pride in leading my disciples into reliever bliss. So go get a comfy seat upon the porcelain throne of fantasy knowledge and let me guide you, for I am the fantasy bullpen shepherd.
Please, blog, may I have some more? Closer Rankings: Spring Training Edition
February 5, 2016 | Closers, Middle Relievers | 68 Commentsby: Smokey
With every first list or preseason edition of anything, there comes question marks. Lots of ifs and buts, with no real sound determination until we actual see the product. I am pretty sure Jane Austen’s first attempt at Pride and Prejudice was an abomination because who knew if Elizabeth Bennett was up to the task of being wifey material? It turns out that I can win a bet and correlate anything into the bullpen situations of the current MLB teams. Until injuries, demotion or a better option arises, we have to go by two main instincts: former ability and common sense. So the list is based off of the news to date that we have gotten on all the potential closers to date and for gigg’s I have ranked them accordingly. I have been doing bullpens for a long time and have been wrong on a few occasions, but I am not the manager or GM for the team pulling the strings, I am merely a fantasy writer. So here is the Spring training edition of the Closer rankings, their set-up men, and the cuffs we covet for fantasy in 2016.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
Ambulance Report, Week 24: Season Enders
September 13, 2015 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball | 4 Commentsby: Davidwiers
A scant three weeks remaining in the regular season, an injury or stint on the disabled list now tends to stick the proverbial fork in someone’s season. In addition to the normal injury reports, a slew of pitchers and hitters returned to active rosters today. Just call me Professor Farnsworth because “Good news, everyone!” we have a lot of players to discuss.
Please, blog, may I have some more?A little birdie told me our 2024 Fantasy Baseball subscriptions are live. The little birdie also said it includes our Draft War Room. You really wanna lose in a fantasy baseball league to a little birdie? Would be kinda embarrassing, tbhhttps://t.co/1ag7IFSYS0
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