by: Grey
Mike Carp is hitting .350 since July 1st. (Thereabouts, I did the math in my head. At least I think it was my head. Hmm…) Carp only has 4 homers, but now has two homers in the last 4 games. He’s also hit in 11 straight games. Finally… There’s no finally, isn’t the first three […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Jason Heyward sat again yesterday in favor of Jose Constanza. I don’t want to shout fire in the theater of Razzball, but this isn’t good. Constanza is making Heyward look like the best seller at the jerk store. Actually, Heyward was kinda doing it to himself. This year he has 12 homers and a .222 […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?I was like, “Yo, Grey, you gotta do a Closer Look, like, last week so everyone knows what is the haps on closers!” Then I was like, “After the trading deadline, which I went over in Toto, not a whole lot changes.” Then I was like, “What is “the haps?” The happenings? Then say that. […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Tommy Hanson is having his next start pushed back. Well, it’s not official yet according to the Braves. But they read Razzball, so we’ll just say it’s official now. Even if Hanson’s next start isn’t pushed back, it should be. On Saturday he looked like Rocky Dennis trying on a fitted ball cap. If you […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
On this episode of Solid Goldschmidt, we have Neil Young performing, “I’ve Been Searchin’ For a Heart of Goldschmidt,” and later the nursery rhyme, “John Jacob Paul Goldschmidt, His Name Is On My Buy List Too,” song by Various Artists. Well, I’m just full of Goldschmidt! Goldschmidt may have Growing Pains but don’t call him […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?The M’s are calling up Trayvon Robinson today. Should be fun for the Dodgers to get a look at their first mistake under Selig. Trayvon’s a high risk/high reward call up which sounds a lot better than Seattle’s low risk/low reward offense. It’s like taking a chance on the next Kurt Cobain or Jimi Hendrix […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
As Alex Rodriguez rehabs down in Miami, the heat (oofa!) is on his gambling habits. “According to the baseball executive, MLB has yet to positively determine that Rodriguez took part in the (poker) games, which reportedly included actors Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, John Malkovich and that guy in that movie starring that other guy.” Poker […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Linguist, academic and all-around good guy with a lot of free time on his hands, David Crystal says there’s been no definitive research on how many people are actually laughing out loud when they type out el oh el (Thanks, Wikipedia!). I’m guessing the number is less than 50% and the number of people actually […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Derrek Lee went 2-for-4 with 3 RBIs and two homers as he continues to get medieval on pitching, which isn’t an old crack, though it could be. I appreciate the Pirates trying to make moves at the trading deadline, but their moves were kinda of the “We’re gonna make moves so it seems like we’re […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?While balancing a book on their head, the Blue Jays were poised to call up Brett Lawrie just when he fractured his hand. That’s worst timing than the guy down at your local Chuckles nightclub doing an open mic set. But flip our Supreme Buddha In Funny Poses day calender two months later and the […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Ed Wade’s Toupee has made it clear that he’s trying to move Hunter Pence in a trade. Why would the Astros want to hold onto their best player? He just gives his fans false hope. False hope is worst than no hope. See every movie John Singleton’s done since Boyz n the Hood for examples […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Is there anything more fulfilling than grabbing a hitter on a short schedule day and he gives you a home run, steal or just an overall quality day? It’s the fantasy baseball equivalent to taking a girl out, she pays and has sex with you (assuming you’re not a paid escort, though I’m pretty sure […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?