by: Grey
Houston ain’t got a problem! Hashtag nailed it! Hashtag blessed for Dad jokes! Hashtag I still got it! [as I walk off the curb, sprain my ankle and trip into the sewer] I’m good! Little help! Captain Woo Cubano’s three homers yesterday brought him a step closer to respectability. By which I mean, anyone who […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Yesterday, Jose Tena went 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 1st homer. His last name you might remember from when you used to ask your dad for money. “Can I get $20?” “How about a Tena?” Tena spent roughly seven years in the minors and looked to be hitting well as far back as Rookie Ball […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Hey, how’s everyone doing? Why am I icing my ankle? I’ll explain: Jumping on a couch for the promotion of Crews, when I fell, spraining my ankle, because I was showing off by doing my own enthusiasm. That’ll teach me to do my own enthusiasm. [plays Mission Impossible theme] Dylan Crews (0-for-3, as he hit […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Rays got Stone’d yesterday. Not as in they thought it was Max Munchies, and giggled for an hour straight. Not as in they showed too much knee and al-Qaeda stoned them. Not as in they were a fan of The Beatles than they matured into an adult, stopped liking kiddie music, and heard the much […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
A Crying, Laughing Emoji sits in a doctor’s office when an emoji with a stethoscope enters and checks its head. Nothing. The Doctor Emoji holds its ear to the Crying, Laughing Emoji’s head to see if it hears anything. Doctor Emoji explains, “I think I see the problem, you don’t have a brain.” That’s an […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
I’m going to take you back to my top 100 for the 2nd half from about a month ago…[time machine spinning, you slowly growing back hair]…There, you’re 20 pounds lighter–how much Taco Bell do you eat?–and you can read where I wrote, “My 2nd starter, Corbin Burnes, has sub-8.5 K/9. He’s clearly not right. And […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
We need to appreciate the greatness that we are witnessing. We cannot let the extraordinary become ordinary. Last night, Juan Soto went 2-for-3, 2 runs, 5 RBIs with his 36th homer. When he hit his homer in the first at-bat, his last eight hits at that point were all homers. If Babe Ruth did that […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Could Reynaldo Lopez (5 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 2.05) actually be in the NL Cy convo? Comatose Braves Fan, “Reynaldo Lopez is in the running for the NL Cy? Plus Fried?! Right?!” Comatose Braves Fan, hold on– “–No! I won’t hold on! Plus, Acuña for MVP! Or is it Albies? […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Quietly, Corey Seager (2-for-3, 4 RBIs, 27th and 28th homer) has stayed healthy all year. ‘Quietly’ because I think if you would’ve told anyone that he’d play in 95% of his team’s games he’d be a top 20 guy, easily. Before yesterday, he had thirty more at-bats than Zach Neto and exactly the same amount […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
[opens Pixies Wiki page] Francis Bowden aka Bowden Francis aka Bowden Black aka Francis Black has influenced so many baseball players, such as Luke Weezer, Ramon Nirvana Jr., Smasherino Pumpquez and Radio Cabeza. Ha-Seong Kim was tight with him, then Kim and him split, then came back together, then broke up again, then came back […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Junior Caminero called up! Jasson Dominguez could be coming soon if the Yankees get sick of watching Verdugo pop-up to the 2nd baseman! Last week I gave you someone exciting who will be up shortly (if my sources are correct) in Christian Moore! This week which hot young exciting player do I have up my […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Jace Jung was called up yesterday. In Triple-A, he went 14 HRs, .257 with 2 steals. Every Tigers prospect of the last five years had the exact same line. No, not literally, but if you were to tell me 14 HRs, .257, and guess if it’s Torkelson, Carpenter, Justyn-Henry Malloy, Dillon Dingler, Colt Keith or […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?