I’m taking my chips and going home from the DFS season. What a ride it’s been making some good calls, some bad calls and sometimes the occasional really confusing link. This will be it for me in the land of milk and money. All $4.75 of my winnings to show for the hours on end I have spent looking at this maddening game called daily fantasy. Fortunately for me I got a break from the guys at DraftKings and they made Andrew Cashner ($6,600) way Way WAY too cheap today and I’m going to bounce on this like a kid in an inflatable castle. Speaking of inflatable things I saw this the other day. That is just all kinds of wrong. Cashner stepped up to his old self in his last outing by going 6, striking out 8 and walking zero…against the Dodgers. Now I get that the Dodgers have been all kinds of hot garbage lately but they still have bats that can hurt you bad. Today he gets a team of WTF in the Diamondbacks and I don’t see Cash letting them small ball him into a blow-up. Play this one with complete faith that I won’t screw you over as I’m out the door. He’s a solid guy at home against a team with nothing to fear. Trust me!

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to check the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Around here at Razzball we are one big family that is some freakish hybrid of the Brady Bunch meets the Addams Family. Honestly, I’m not really sure what to make of all this. First we have our father Grey, the dad who works all day, comes home every night to a daiquiri, and goes out on the weekend and buys us the $100 high tops we want, but mom won’t let us have. He does this to make up for all the little league games he missed because he was bringing home the bacon. Now, Rudy is our mother, and I mean this in the nicest, most masculine way possible. He’s there to keep everything sensible, clean, and in order. Jay and Sky are the older brothers we come to for advice when we get in trouble, or to teach us how to undo a bra with one hand. Guru is Grey’s illegitimate child from a high school girlfriend that is re-connecting with us, and getting to know his dad. Jeremy and I are the younger brothers just glad to get scraps and a hand me down that isn’t filled with holes. Mike is our reliable uncle, who taught us how to properly swing a bat and to drive our shoulder to the plate when we pitched. Smokey is our cool uncle, who gives us beer and taught us all how to roll a doobie so we’ll be ready for high school. Tehol is our creepy uncle, who wears ridiculous clothes that border on illegal, and who our parents never want to leave us alone with since the “incident”. Nick is our neighbor that takes too many pictures and video of the family, even when we aren’t aware of it. Scott is our bachelor neighbor, who drives a kick ass Iroc-Z and dates a different 20-year-old every week. Our cousins Pete, Josh, Dano, and Tom are always hanging out because their mother, Paulie, and father, Dan, are either drinking or drinking. It’s a family over here, I’ll cut any mother f***er who tries to mess with these guys, and have no problem doing a couple a months in county to protect them. That’s why when Jay called upon me to help him out and cover the RCL recap this week I was ready to step up to the plate and help a brother out.

Please, blog, may I have some more?