Bruce To Get His Phil Of Greetings Near Asbury Park

June 3, 2019 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 568 Comments

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This weekend Jay Bruce was traded to the Phillies, because, as the front office in Philly put it, “We’re sick of our autocorrect writing Bruce Harper. Now we write Bruce Harper and rather than backspacing we can just continue on and we’ve typed out two-thirds of our outfield. Next we have to try to get Michael Chavis, for our issue with the autocorrect Michael Franco.” Guys and five girl readers, the Phillies have a plan! This move also kills two birds with one stone since now Bryce Harper will look so much better by comparison. Before, “Man, Bryce stinks.” After, “Man, Bruce stinks.” Autocorrect and by comparison — done and done! This likely puts David Herrera’s time all but done on the Phils and maybe baseball until the Astros take a chance on him. Yes, Odubel’s real name is David, which is now what we, like the cops, call him. As for Bruce, this is a boost up for him, due to park and lineup. Now he’s a 30-homer hitter with a .225 average and better runs and RBIs. Can I get a middle-case yay? Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Tout Wars 12-Team, NL-Only Draft Recap: Staying On Brand

March 18, 2019 | Our Leagues | 366 Comments

by: Grey

At one point in Sunday’s draft, Andy Behrens said to me, “I can’t believe you went to $3 on Peter O’Brien. That’s not on brand for you.” You know what; he’s right. Shame on me for briefly going off brand. Even if it was for a millisecond between bids $2 and $3 on the 35-year-old rookie, Peter O’Brien, who has more holes in his swing than Swiss cheese at a shooting range. Maybe the, um, spirit of drafting on St. Patty’s Day overcame me. Maybe I was hoping O’Brien could make me some hurricanes while I waded in my kiddie pool this summer. It’s Andy Behrens’s brand to draft terrible players. That’s not my brand. I realized that soon enough, Dear Reader. Andy went to $4 and I let him have O’Brien. I suppose if things break right, O’Brien will retire at some point this summer and look kindly on Behrens for drafting him, then offer his services as a babysitter. I don’t need a babysitter; my wife is like a decade older than me! Okay, I’m about to drop on you one of the sexiest NL-Only teams. You might want to place an extra-wide condom over your head, before I impregnate your eyes. Anyway, here’s my Tout Wars 12-team, NL-Only draft recap:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Top 20 Catchers for 2019 Fantasy Baseball

January 16, 2019 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 134 Comments

by: Grey

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Hello, darkness, my old friend. But replace ‘darkness’ with ‘catchers’ and ‘my old friend’ with ‘we have to get through this to get further into our 2019 fantasy baseball rankings.’ Hmm…Then replace ‘our 2019 fantasy baseball rankings’ with ‘my 2019 fantasy baseball rankings,’ then replace ‘with’ with ‘wit’ to millennialify it, then replace every third ‘replace’ with ‘in place of’ to diversify word choice because my 3rd grade teacher, Ms. Pinatauro, said we shouldn’t repeat words–Actually, she can eat it! After going over the top 10 for 2019 fantasy baseball and the top 20 for 2019 fantasy baseball (clickbait!), we are now in the positional rankings, and all 2019 fantasy baseball rankings can be found there. Here’s Steamer’s 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. The projections noted in the post are my own, and I mention where tiers start and stop. I also mention a bunch of hullabaloo, so let’s get to it. Anyway, here’s the top 20 catchers for 2019 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

And The Reddick’s Glare, The Bombs Bursting In Air…

July 5, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 320 Comments

by: Grey

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In 1776 on July 1st, Ben Franklin grabbed Betsy Ross and four of her friends, and was like, “This will be better than Flag Day. We will call this Flagellation Day. Now twerk with a firework!” That lasted for three days until Ben yelled out an Astros’ hitter last name and called for a volunteer fire department to put out his redness. As the fire department extinguished his Reddick, Ben proclaimed July 4th to be a day of national celebration and the rest is history. It’s also when The Stros Spangled Banner was written. Any hoo! Josh Reddick (3-for-4, 2 RBIs) had a slam (8) and legs (4) yesterday, and it’s 2nd day in a row with a homer. He’s owned in only 30% of leagues and that is a crime to humanity, a first world one, at least. God Bless America and Ben Franklin’s Reddick! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

FanDuel: Newcomb Duking The O’s

June 22, 2018 | DFS, Fanduel |

by: MattTruss

Happy Friday Razzballers and welcome to FanDuel Friday. It’s looking like we could have some potential rain issues on this full slate, but we’ll do our best to monitor and adjust closer to lineup lock. If the rain holds off in Hotlanta tonight I’m all over Sean Newcomb ($8,900) as my top pitching play. First of all, the O’s are in an NL park, which means Alex Cobb will have a bat in his hands. Secondly, the O’s have been dreadful. They have the third worst team OPS and are 11th in team strikeouts. As long as Newcomb can be efficient with his pitches, he should have no trouble mowing down O’s. The 9+ k-rate is juicy and the 3.23 FIP shows that the 2.70 ERA isn’t that fluky. Oh, and just for good measure, Alex Cobb and his 7.14 ERA are in town, so the Braves bats should have a field day. Now, let’s hope Mother Nature cooperates with our money-making plans.

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Another LA Newbie Getting By Stripling For Money

June 6, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 374 Comments

by: Grey

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Opening a gift, “Aw, geez, Kershaw, you didn’t have to give me your arm.” That’s Ross Stripling at the office Christmas party. “Don’t mention it. Hey, Tommy Lasorda, could you get off my lap, my back is starting to hurt. Also, you’re not wearing pants.” I forget if I ever told you — the royal you since you’re wearing that Burger King crown — but a friend of mine told me Lasorda still goes to the Dodgers’ clubhouse to use the showers and likes to walk around naked. How’s dem visuals! By the by, I’ve reached the age where I forget if a friend of mine told me that, I heard it on the radio or if a commenter told me. Welcome to your 40’s, you don’t look a day older than 27. No, really, I don’t. Anyhoo! Last night Stripling did what he’s done all year — 5 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 1.52. The slightly bizzonkers thing is his peripherals say he’s nearly this good — 11.1 K/9, 1.9 BB/9, 2.63 xFIP. Don’t love he throws only 92 MPH, but he’s dominating with the curve. He credits pitching coach, Rick Honeycutt, with his newfound success, saying he told him to throw the curve as hard as he can. I see no velocity difference in his curve, according to the stats, but stats-schmats, Honeycutt-Schmoneycutt, whatever works. At this point, hard to ignore the results(schmults). Anyway, here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball yesterday:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

SAGNOF Report: I Left My Keys In Jean Segura

May 21, 2018 | Uncategorized | 15 Comments

by: Smokey

For all intents and purposes, Jean Segura was a flopapotamus last year, failing to get to any of the previous year’s stats across the board. That includes the all loving steals category. He has gone from 33 in 2016, to 22 last year, to already having 11 in just over 200 plate appearances, which is a phenomenal pace for anyone that bought into him a his ADP in draft season. Eleven steals already leads to a projection of right around 40, and 40 steals is fantastic, as it has only been eclipsed 10 times in the last few years. Which brings back my old standby statement: that steals are a dying breed except for the select few. I fully expect that the Mariners, who currently sit top-6 in MLB in steals, to keep the running game as a a major cog now that Robbie Cano isn’t around showing his elite speed. With Dee Gordon and Segura, the Mariners have a duo of speed that really is unrivaled by other MLB teams. The past week for Jean has seen his total jump from 5 to 11 steals overall. (Coincidence that Cano isn’t in the lineup that he is taking the base rather than trying to get hit over? I think not.) Nothing about that screams coincidence, it would be more of a coincidence for me to casually run into my ex-girlfriend outside the church on her wedding day. So with a slash line of .414/.419/.655 since the removal of Cano, he looks primed to be an even more of a steal threat moving forward. That is also a nod for Dee because the re-invention of lineup changes is the way a team plays. I read that in a fortune cookie just now. So welcome to SAGNOF day, kinda like Rusev day, but with less Bulgarian influence.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

SAGNOF Report: Like Taking Second Base From A Baby

May 7, 2018 | Uncategorized | 8 Comments

by: Smokey

SAGNOF info is the best way to get a leg up on the SAGNOF trade. (I challenged myself to use that anagram twice in the same sentence.) Challenge accomplished, and in the first line too! Wish I had longer arms than those baby T-Rex arms because the pats on the back wouldn’t stop. As I continue the back lauding, the week upcoming is a bear market in steals. The year is mimicking the previous year’s steals downward trend, as it is down almost 8% of the pace from last years total to date. So if you have a valuable piece of steals bait that isn’t doing so great, let’s say his name is “Billy Hamilton” and you are having trouble getting ample trade value for him… read this post so it can be explained that despite his sub-200 average and lower than expected 5 steals to date, he still has stolen base value. Yes, you are going to have to trade for 75 cents on the dollar, but explain this to someone looking for steals and are down on Billy that he is still top-20 in steals and with that 5 steals total, he would be at 20% of most teams total steals on the year in fantasy. That number obviously changes by league type and such, and I took an average of all the leagues I myself compete in (median is 31). So while I sit here and let you either figure out how to sell high or buy low on Billy Hamilton, continue the read and learn about the steals that will come, have happened, and the week’s thievery to be. Cheers!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Cleveland Bats Coming Back From Vacarnacion

May 3, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 547 Comments

by: Grey

“I want to recreate the Pequot War of 1636, but I don’t want to use ordinary weapons, instead I want to use diarrhea.” “How would that work, Matt Moore?” “I’m thinking whenever I see an Indian, I throw crap. Then instead of Pocahontas, I can scream, ‘Poke-a-hot-ass,’ but rather than it be traditionally offensive, it can mean the stream of hot ass I’m throwing.” “Feels a little performance arty.” Instead of listening to his agent, Matt Moore (4 IP, 10 ER), went ahead with his revolutionary war. Finally, Edwin Encarnacion (3-for-5, 6 RBIs, and his 7th, 8th and 9th homers) showed up. “I told you not to put my name on a tag on my foot.” That’s Edwin showing signs of life. Might still be able to buy him low due to his sub-Mendoza batting average (.191), but I’d buy fast, because he could go on a 17+ homers in a month power spree. Also, in this game, Jason Kipnis (2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 1st homer) said, “JK still playing baseball, not JK as in just kidding, but my initials. In case, ya know, you thought otherwise.” I have little to no love for Kipnis, this was against one of the worst pitchers in baseball, and means little. “I’m not a bad pitcher, I’m a terrible historical recreator!” That’s Matt Moore. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

SAGNOF Report, Week 4: Miss Matched Sox

April 23, 2018 | Uncategorized | 10 Comments

by: Smokey

I have gone over the preseason, in-season, and shortly in 5-6 months, the postseason love for all things Tim Anderson. No, the another SB dude from the other, other side of Chicago. Which in my mind is a triangle, or from the angle that I am drinking at, it’s a complete hypotenuse. Yoan Moncada over the last 11 days has proven that the Go-Go Sox are in full affect, or flavor. Whatever the millennials wanna call it. Is rad still a thing? Never the who, he has 4 steals over the last 11 games and the propensity, which we thought was potential in the preseason for a lot of the southsiders, is totally a legit thing. The license to steal (like an opposite version of Bond, or a Fredo Bandido of steals) has the Sox players that hit towards the top of the lineup, when on base, gives them full autonomy to take it. And by it, I mean the steal of a bag. Not only do I love it, I would condone a trade for Yoan at some expense that is a sort of overspend. His hit rate screams breakout, and I mean who doesn’t like a screamer. Lets everyone know who is laying down the law. Gives us all a little extra wink-wink. Extra is right! He has hit near the top of the order for days and it should continue. The one thing that bad teams are good at is ulterior fantasy goodies, and steals is definitely one of those stats. So do yourself a favor, go propose to the Yoan owner and say would you have and hold me forever, and ever, and trade me him for a slightly over pay. Your stats won’t hate you in the morning. Let’s see what else is hopping on the good foot and stealing the good things in the saves and steals department. But with charts for her pleasure…or yours.

Picking on catchers in daily roster moves is fun. Here are the SV leaders for steals against this season. Not ever stat is a good stat, especially when you have catchers and the frequency of steals against. It isn’t always their fault, but it is not, not their fault. Ya dig?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Teoscar’s Ceremony So Long I Started to Yoan

April 19, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 683 Comments

by: Grey

…And presenting our next award is Chance the Rapper and Grey the Napper. *I lean into the mic* “Thank you, it’s wonderful to be here. Did you know the inventor of Ping Pong originally named it Fing Fong? Yup, but he had terrible penmanship.” *no one laughs* “Oh, hey, there’s Jeff Daniels. My dad loves you, but calls you Jack Daniels. Then again, I’m not sure he’s talking about you. Anyway, the nominees for our first Teoscar are… Teoscar Hernandez, from years in the minors of 17 homers, 33 steals. Teoscar Hernandez, from the projections of 17/17 for this year. Finally, Tesocar Hernandez, playing a fire emoji in The Emoji Movie, who yesterday went 4-for-6, 2 runs, 4 RBIs, hitting .421, with his 1st homer, while coming a double short of the cycle. And the winner is… *fumbles with envelope* “Wow! Tesocar Hernandez.” “He was the only one nominated, and it’s called the Teoscars.” “Shut up, Chance! You’re ruining the ratings! By the way, to cover the weed smell in your house, you should open a Subway sandwich shop in your living room.” So, obviously Teoscar’s been all that and a swag bag of freebies, and I would grab him in all leagues. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m Damn Scherzer Them Hitters Didn’t Have a Kluber

April 10, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 479 Comments

by: Grey

Yesterday, it was a good day (freaking brothers every way like M.J.) to be an ace. Corey Kluber went 8 IP, 0 ER, 2 hits, 1 walk, 13 Ks, ERA at 1.57, pitching against the Tigers. One of the best, if not the best, pitchers goes against one of the worst, if not the worst, hitting teams, and you have a masterpiece by the pitcher. Just be clause. Qualifying, that is. To not be outdone, Max Scherzer went 9 IP, 0 ER, 2 hits, 0 walks, 10 Ks, ERA at 0.90, and stole his first base. Take that, Ohtani! Scherzer has 80 grade speed if he’s in a DeLorean and wants to go back to 1955. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?