SAGNOF is gonna be something in the blink they’re going to call this MLB season. I was tempted to write up a Billy Hamilton dart throw, and, if this delay lasts until August, I may just do that. I’m not one hundred percent sure what to do with fantasy baseball strategy for a 50-game season, but that could be the fun. What do we punt? What do we focus on? Still hoping for a 70-game season, but that might be deliriously optimistic at this point. Do we throw steals and saves out the window completely and focus on homers? Okay, but someone is going to Tuffy Rhodes up in here, have a 14-homer August, and we’re gonna see something like, “Jesus Aguilar leads the majors in homers.” Steals might actually be the most predictable stat this year, which brings me to Jarrod Dyson. If a guy can steal 20 bags in 60 games, that doesn’t just go away. Whereas someone who can hit 20 homers in 60 games could get ice cold and end up with a five-homer season. Shizz is gonna be weird this year. I’ve come to peace with what will be an absurd season. We play fantasy baseball for fun and as a distraction, after all, and what’s more fun and distracting than seeing Kurt Suzuki in the hunt for a batting title or something similarly goofy? “Bring on the madness,” is what I mumble through my pandemic mask. So, what can we expect from Jarrod Dyson for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?
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At the end of my last post, Baseball is Back with a Whimper: Pandemic Draft Week Recap, a Razzballer named Homer’s got the runs asked if Austin Martin might spend some time in the majors this year, and I had no idea. Well, I had some ideas, but they mostly circled the spires of HellifIknow Mountcastle, the official building of Major League Baseball in 2020.
We got another noise out of Manfart this week completely disagreeing with the sounds Manfart made last week. Now he says there might not be baseball at all after saying there would definitely 100,000 percent be baseball in 2020. Hindsight, man. Farts.
Main reason he said anything is the players were like, okay, we’ll play, let’s get started, and ownership was all, but wait, we’re not ready, and you might sue us because we don’t know if what we’re doing is legal. The players wouldn’t sign waivers that said it didn’t matter if the owners were street legal or not, so the owners trotted out this fool who gave away leverage on national television because he momentarily forgot every syllable is a war aimed at the 2021 Competitive Balance Agreement.
Please, blog, may I have some more?For players who only played in 38 or fewer games since 2018, Yoenis Cespedes leads that group in home runs, RBIs, runs–I’m kidding. That is what we’re about to walk into though, if/when this season gets going. People are going to be talking about how great a player is in 40-or-less games. What a jizzoke. Also, anyone that says, “This is going to be more of a sprint than a marathon.” Tell them to buy The Giant Book of Metaphors & Similes, which is like…um…what’s a giant book of metaphors and similes like? Damn, should’ve bought that book when I saw it the last time I was in a bookstore in 2002. This baseball season is going to be as long as the line at your nearest Barnes & Noble. Bookstore employee, “Just this one book for today?” Customer, “Yeah, that’s it.” Bookstore Employee, “Would you mind filling out a survey?” Customer, “Um, yeah, sure.” Employee, “Great, 1st question is: Why are you in a bookstore? Second question: Do you not have internet?” Customer, “This survey is tough!” Any hoo! With the delayed season, we have a chance to ACKSUALLY see Yoenis Cespedes. So, what can we expect from Yoenis Cespedes for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?
Please, blog, may I have some more?Baking, Baseball, and Baseball not being played that’s the theme for this week’s show as Shelly Verougstraete of several websites (Rotographs, Dynasty Guru, Pitcher List, Prospects 365, and Over the Monster) and the best baking Instagram you’ll ever witness joins us. We indulge in our virtual sweet tooth as Grey and Shelly talk baking and I just drool at Shelly’s Instagram. Boy that sounds different when read aloud. No matter, we get into last week’s draft and some of the top fantasy names to look for, as well as discuss a little of the current MLB versus MLBPA drama. It’s another can’t miss episode of the Razzball podcast.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Prior to be doing my fifteen-hundredth dart throw, Bartolo Colon. “Hey, listen, if you can get him cheap and with the NL DH–” *smoke rises from RoboGrey’s ears* Seriously, could someone unplug the MLB season, blow into the cartridge and plug it back in? On phone with AppleCare, “For the last few weeks, I’ve only seen the pinwheel on the baseball season, and the big brains at the Genius Bar have no idea what to do. Any suggestions?” For those not following too closely, the MLB owners are imitating Wimpy and saying, “We will kindly pay you next Collective Bargaining Agreement for a hamburger today,” and the players, crazily enough, are saying, “Hold up, you want us to play for 80% of our salary?” And the MLB owners are replying, “Yeah, c’mon, you crooks, you have so much money.” Then the players are like, “You’re paying us but claiming to have less money than us? Ain’t that some shizz?” I expected this to be resolved by now, but resolution at this point seems like it’s going to come down to Head Idiot Rob Manfred, and him forcing the season into existence. If I’m reading all of the negotiations correctly, Head Idiot can force a 48-game season, but can’t force players to play. Make sense? No, of course it doesn’t! The Head Idiot said last week there would 100% be a season, and this week said there wouldn’t. In other words, the Head Idiot doesn’t even know what the Head Idiot can do because, get this, he’s an idiot. Some have speculated that MLB will force a 48-game season, but it’s way too early now since they have to play until September 27th, because of TV schedules, so they’re stalling for another week or two. All of that led to this breaking news yesterday:
BREAKING: MLB
— Razzball (@Razzball) June 15, 2020
If a season is forced, I wouldn’t be shocked if some big names opt out like Mike Trout, Christian Yelich and, really, anyone who has plenty of ‘eff you’ money. Once we have a set number of games, we will update our rankings and possibly remove players who aren’t playing. Also, as we talk about on today’s podcast, coming later today, I was against redrafting leagues, but if a lot of players are sitting out and we’re playing a 50-game season, then, yeah, it becomes unfair to try to play out a league drafted prior to all of this. On the other hand, maybe it’ll be fun to just play it out. I’m saying that last line in case any MLB owners or players are reading. Play it out! Anyway, here’s what else I saw for 2020 fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?The word on the street is that there will definitely be a 2020 season. In fact, Rob Right Said manFred said he guarantees that there will be a season. In its worst form it will be a 48-game season. The players want 89 games and the owners want 76 games. Or something along those lines. As most of you might know, the sticking point is, of course, salaries.
The salary dispute is mostly irrelevant to us. All we care about is if there will be a season. Both the NHL and NBA are returning. MLB will follow suit. MLB actually has the authority to impose a 48-game season if a deal cannot be reached. The timeline on this is not clear yet, but I’ve got to think by next week a decision has got to be made. With that in mind, we’ve got to start being proactive about what a 2020 fantasy season might look like.
After a bit of soul searching, here is what I am proposing to my primary head-to-head points league. Just to set the context our league is a ten-team league where we play two matchups each week. Our season consists of 22 weeks of regular season followed by two rounds of two-week playoff matchups. Our roster size is 30 and we can keep six players for as many years as we want. For the sake of this discussion our scoring system is irrelevant, but I do believe that it’s a bit skewed towards starting pitchers. Nonetheless it does not impact my proposal.
First order of business is the draft. Fortunately we did not hold our draft before the season was shutdown. Truth be told, no league should have held a draft. I’m a firm believer that a draft should not be held more than ten days prior to opening day. I actually prefer the seven day threshold, but ten is the max. And let’s face it, it’s 2020 and just about every draft is hosted online. There’s little to no excuse to not being able to find a day that works for everyone. We’re all busy, I know. Yadda freaking yadda.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Alanna Rizzo (@Alannarizzo), host/reporter for the L.A Dodgers joins the show to breakdown this loaded Dodgers team. We discuss where we think players will bat in the order and who will have the biggest impact. Will Gavin Lux stay in the bottom of the order? Is the catching position Will Smiths to lose? The starting rotation is loaded with great lefties. Who holds down the 5 spot? Alex Wood, Ross Stripling, Jimmy Nelson could all get a shot. Alanna gives us her insight on who holds down the rotation. We also dove into one of the deepest farm systems in baseball. Alanna also tells us how great it has been covering Clayton Kershaw and others throughout the years, her favorite ballparks and some other fun memories!
Please, blog, may I have some more?How’s everyone liking us talking to a comedian on Patreon podcasts? I’m loving it. Can I say that or is it immodest? You know what, I don’t think immodest is bad, because I don’t know what immodest even means, so there! This week we welcomed, Billy Hurley, a NYC-based comedian. Wow, such credits! I kid, Billy’s awesome. Here’s how I know Billy: He was a fan of Razzball and I randomly followed him on Twitter and he made me laugh a lot, so now we’re like BFFs. Not really, but don’t tell him. Here’s a sample of a Billy Hurley tweet:
Please, blog, may I have some more?I was having a blast watching the 2020 Major League Baseball Rule 4 Draft, but at some point in the 4th round, the whole pageant started to feel gross.
All these billion dollar teams focused on doing little maneuvers to afford the high school kids they actually wanted.
In the draft.
When you presumably add the players you want.
It’s incongruous.
And it’s not some pandemic 2020 thing.
That’s just the base design of the thing made even more salient by the compressed variation MLB farted together in what passed for their attempt to rise to these unique circumstances.
Seniors’ ages are leveraged against them.
Juniors’ ages are leveraged against them.
Sophomores’ ages are leveraged against them in a slightly different, Wilcoxian way.
All this so owners can acquire laborers who’ll make less than minimum wage as cheaply as possible. It’s a salary cap for amateurs, designed to be much, much smaller budgets than a free market would generate.
One might think the Yankees, Cubs, Dodgers or just about anyone competitive would campaign for more, maybe even better, but it turns out: who doesn’t love the leverage provided by an artificial line beyond which you must not go?
Easy way to end negotiations.
Just like writing some bullshit god-power rule into the bylaws of a short-term agreement built to get through a pandemic. I knew the players shouldn’t have signed that noise.
Anyhow, onto the shizz, making my best Karl Ravich face.
Let’s start with my least favorite few drafts so we can end on a high note.
Please, blog, may I have some more?With baseball still on the proverbial shelf, most offseason concerns we had for injuries are gone. We’ll cover a few small updates here today as we hopefully move towards some number of games this season.
The biggest news over the last few weeks was with Chris Archer. The Pirates righty was shut down for surgery to correct “Thoracic Outlet Syndrome” this is the same issue that sidelined Matt Harvey earlier in his career. Archer was already a shell of his former self, and really only someone you’d be taking a late round flyer on or picking up in a 2 start week hoping for some K’s, but this puts him on the shelf until the beginning of the ’21 season at best.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Welcome, friends! Come, sit down, and let me tell you a tale of baseball. Indeed, baseball is truly America’s game, where the owners swim Scrooge McDuck-style in a vat of gold coins while shaking their canes vigorously at those thieves pounding at the door asking for some gruel. But you–yes, you!–fantasy lothario, with your fantasy baseball app at the ready and a sweaty finger hovering over the “draft” button, you can roster these needy players and give them the virtual coins they so deserve. Today, I’m offering a pitcher profile of Jake Odorizzi, and why you should consider him for a place on your team for the next 50, 70, or how ever many games MLB owners decide to let happen before they move their money vaults into the Norwegian tundra.
Because this is my first article with Razzball, I consulted Grey’s Secret Dictionary to see his definition of ‘pitcher,’ and here’s what it said: “1) a tool for mixing margaritas on Wednesday mornings, 2) players you don’t take early in a draft.” And that’s me quoting Grey! Wednesday Grey must have been deep into his routine of margs and Frasier reruns when he wrote the following on Odorizzi: “Odorizzi’s being drafted like a number three or four, but I see a strong number two.” Whoa, Grey, TMI! Let’s get down to business and see why you want this number two to work for you.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Everywhere you look, it says Mike Yastrzemski is the best Giants hitter. *you carefully crack into a fortune cookie, you read about how Mike Yastrzemski is the best Giants hitter, slowly you look up* I told you. Everywhere. Don’t doubt me again. More people agree on Mike Yastrzemski being the best Giants hitter than anything else in this country. It’s the last thing that binds us. If Brandon Belt becomes the Giants’ best hitter, we will completely unravel. Sadly, being the best Giants hitter is like being the world’s tallest midget. Similarly, Mike Yastrzemski fits under the idea of most other players’ ceilings. In JKJ’s piece on NL West DH candidates, he mentions Yaz Jr. Jr., while also mentioning Wilmer Flores, and that’s prolly the name there to keep in mind for their DH spot. Or as I said in the Joey Bart dart throw, Posey could DH while Bart catches. Yaz Jr. Jr. doesn’t need the DH. He is the Giants’ best hitter — have you already forgotten? It’s the one thing that unites us! Yaz 2.0 won’t DH most days; he’ll just play the field. Either way, he’ll play every day. He’s the Giants’ best hitter! So, what can we expect from Mike Yastrzemski for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?
Please, blog, may I have some more?