The longest journey begins with a single step then, of course, an oblique injury. Can we get a team of crack scientists working on a cure for the obliques? The other day someone asked me for money for Doctors Without Borders so they could help people in The Congo. Why isn’t there a guy in front of Whole Foods asking me to donate to find a cure for Jose Reyes‘ oblique? It might be an everyday item that could fix this. Maybe a steady diet of cucumbers is all he needs. How do we know if no one’s doing the leg work? Film a PSA with Chipper Jones and Julie Andrews and show that shizz before movies. We need money to stop the spread of oblique injuries. Now! The Mets are saying Jose Reyes’ newest flare up is mild. They said the same stupid thing with their same stupid mouths two months ago when he missed three weeks. I’m hoping for the best; I’m expecting the worst. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jon Niese – 5 2/3 IP, 7 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks. I’m probably give him more of a benefit of the doubt than maybe I should, but Niese was done in by a bloop ground rule double that was barely fair and Dessens allowing inherited runners to score.
David Wright – 2-for-3 with his 21st homer. Just think, if he played in Toronto, he’d have 41 homers.
Stephen Strasburg – The Nationals announced they will probably shutdown Strasburg for the season. Backdate this a week. Of course they’re shutting him down. The Nats announced this while Bryce Harper was taking batting practice. The ol’ “Hey, look at this new shiny toy” trick. Guess it’s better than the ol’ “Shine a flashlight on a wall” trick.
Ian Desmond – 4-for-7 and batting .417 in his last ten games. Yesterday, he hit in the five hole, which is also porn-speak for the left nostril.
Jordan Zimmermann – 4 IP, 5 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks. I can’t say I’m fully surprised by this outing. I’d still hold him in NL-Only and keeper leagues. Mixed leagues, you’re gonna have to hold him on your bench, unless you need to take chances.
Drew Storen – 1 IP, 4 ER. Ouch… Wait, what? Oh. Ow.
Wandy Rodriguez – 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks. Right now, if you Google “Phillies offense,” it says “Did you mean Philly defeats?”
Scott Podsednik – 3-for-5, 2 Runs. He’s in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell. I’ll give you a hint, it sounds like Bye. You know, the whole Manny’s leaving and Pods will get playing time thing.
Hong-Chih Kuo – Torre (maybe it was Paul Sorvino) announced that Kuo would be his closer for now, but he wants Broxton back as closer in the landmark case of sooner vs. later.
Ricky Nolasco – Torn meniscus excuses are not in Nolasco’s vocabulary. He will make his next start. I’d continue to roll him out there, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see him get shutdown at some point if the knee flares up.
Hanley Ramirez – 3-for-5 with his 17th homer and he’s now 10 for his last 15. Thank Maybin for pushing Hanley to the three hole.
Yovani Gallardo – 6 1/3 IP, 6 ER, 10 baserunners, 10 Ks. The Ks have been there, but, since he’s returned from the DL, his pitches have looked pretty flatulent. After the All-Star Break, his ERA is near-6.00. Gotta keep running him out there (unless it’s an 8 team league and you manage the other 7 teams under aliases.)
Max Scherzer – 8 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks. Since his return from the minors at the end of May, his ERA is… Wait for it… Here it comes… Shoot, I think I left it in my car… Okay, got it… His ERA is 2.29 in 102 innings. Holy heffin’ hey, that’s good.
Jhonny Peralta – If you lost Reyes to the under-researched oblique injury, Peralta is hitting over .400 with 2 homers in the last 7 days. (It might be 8 days if you count Muesday.)
Justin Masterson – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks. Here’s me yesterday spot starting Masterson. Nope, not going to look at that team for two hours. Nope, not going to watch him pitch at all. I am just going to pray. Thank you, deity!
Stephen Drew – 2-for-5, 4 RBIs and his 3rd homer in two games (all in Petco). Finally, someone is stepping up and helping Momma Drew choose a favorite.
Ian Kennedy – 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners (1 Hit), 12 Ks. A’la Guy Fieri, “That was a crackerjack performance. And crackerjack is good!” I loved Kennedy back in May, then the wheels fell off for a few months and he looked like the 90’s MTV VJ Kennedy. He gets the Padres again in Arizona for his next start. I’d give him a whirlybird in some leagues.
Mark Reynolds – 1-for-5 with his 28th homer. It’s been an ugly month, 4 homers, hitting .179 with 1 steal. I think he probably should’ve went to the DL a few months back rather than fighting through injuries. Donkeys are stubborn though, mini and otherwise.
Alex Rios – 3-for-4 with his 18th homer and 26th steal. Member after his career month I said to Sell him and people wrote something along the lines that I should shut my stupid face? In 285 ABs since that post, he has 6 homers while hitting .277 with 9 steals.
Edwin Jackson – 8 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 10 Ks. He’s seen the O’s and the Tigers twice each since he landed back in the AL. He also has a 0.96 ERA. He gets the Indians next. At any point, he’s going to turn into a pumpkin again, but that’s not a bad spot start.
Brandon Phillips – Had x-rays on his swollen wrist and they came back negative. He says he hopes to play this weekend. His owners say they hope the wrist pain doesn’t affect his swing.
Francisco Liriano – 7 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks. Sonavabench! He was in Arlington, he was coming off a tired arm, he was going against Cliff Lee… He wasn’t supposed to pitch well.
Dustin Pedroia – Sounds like he’s going to be shutdown for the year. I’d drop him. Even if he comes back, what’s he going to give you? A week of hustle? Spunk’s a category in your league? Some would find that hard to swallow.
Bud Selig – Nothing to do with fantasy, but ESPN ran an interesting story yesterday. To appeal to a younger demographic, MLB is taking a page from Scott Pilgrim and pitting Bud Selig vs. his younger self. (Side note: I have no idea who the guy on the right is. It’s called “online journalism.”)
