What’s that I smell? Is it Spring in the air? The hope of baseball dreams wafting through the ether? Did I forget to take my semi-monthly shower? I took a shower 11 days ago, so it’s probably the baseball dreams in the ether one. And nothing says baseball dreams in the the ether like extremely bold, completely baseless predictions with little-to-no grounding in reality, brought to you by some of your favorite Razzball writers. I surveyed 10 of my favorite Razzball writers—the only ones who would talk to me—for their boldest predictions regarding the 2021 baseball season. Here were their bold predictions along with my reaction:
Donkey Teeth: Yusei Kikuchi will post a sub 3.50 ERA, sub 1.25 WHIP and over 150 strikeouts.
Wow, this Donkey Teeth character sounds smart. And handsome too. But seriously, my guy, The Kooch has been nothing short of terrible for his first 200 MLB innings. So it’s easy to forget this is a dude who threw 187 innings in 2017 with a 1.97 ERA, 0.91 WHIP and 217 strikeouts over in Japan. Those are similar to the numbers Yu Darvish posted across the Pacific; hopefully it’s just taking The Kooch a little longer to acclimate to ‘Murica.
Boldness Factor: 7 (scale of 1 to 10)
Grey: Keston Hiura will be demoted at some point, because his average bottoms out.
I’m not buying this one from Señor Lothario. Hiura showed fantastic contact and on base skills all through the minors, and in his first 300 MLB at bats when he hit for a .303 average. Granted, last year’s two month sample was fugly, but a .273 BABIP tells me Hiura had less luck than Grey trying to make a cup of coffee (pictured below).
Boldness Factor: 9
Rudy: Andres Gimenez will steal 40+ bases.
You can count on one hand the number of players who have stolen 40+ bases in a season since the start of 2018. Unless you lost a finger in a freak lawnmower accident. In which case, I apologize for bringing up that traumatic experience. As for Gimenez, Rudy’s own projection system only gives him 23 steals this year so he’ll have to vastly outperform the robot’s expectations. But the 22 year old did steal 38 bags across 122 MiLB games back in 2018, so it’s well within the realm of possibilities.
Boldness Factor: 6
Ralph: Bobby Dalbec will lead all first basemen in home runs and Logan Gilbert will finish the year as a top 30 starter.
Oh baby! These are the hot takes we came for, Ralph is bringing Ohtani-like heat! This call for Dalbec to lead all first basemen in home runs seems downright outrageous at first glance, but 1B is no longer the power trove it used to be. Still, the kid who hit 27 homers across 135 minor league games will need to outslug the likes of Freddie Freeman, Pete Alonso and Matt Olsen, among others.
Bonus points for Ralph on providing a second, equally bold prediction—actually he had a couple other bold predictions regarding huge seasons for Dylan Cease and Hunter Renfroe that didn’t make the cut. As for Logan Gilbert, the kid has never pitched above AA and didn’t register any innings during the 2020 pandemic season. So yeah, predicting he’ll be a top 30 fantasy starter this season qualifies as BOLD. Zac Gallen did post a top 20 season in 2019 with his 80 rookie innings pitched, so it’s not impossible. Just highly improbable, like Grey figuring out how to use a coffee machine.
Boldness Factor: 10
Truss: By June everyone will wish they picked up Jo Adell.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the juicy upside of Adell as much as the next donkey. But playing time’s the key to this prediction since Adell has been relegated to the minors to start the season. In order to find the everyday at bats needed to come through for Truss, Adell will need an injury or major suckiness from one of the Angels’ wrinkly old corner outfielders: Justin Upton and Dexter Fowler. I like those odds, but then he’ll also have to hit really well if/when he does get the opportunity.
Boldness Factor: 7
The Itch: Anthony Bass will hook 35 saves.
Forgive me for questioning the boldness of saying any opening day closer will have 35 saves. Sure, the name Anthony Bass doesn’t exactly elicit fear in the hearts of 9th inning batters. But remember, the ghost of Wade Davis saved 43 games in Colorado during the 2018 season. On the plus side, Itch was the only writer to earn himself pun points with his prediction.
Boldness Factor: 5
B_Don: The Cubs will have five players in the top five at their positions: Javier Baez, Anthony Rizzo, Willson Contreras, Kris Bryant, and Craig Kimbrel.
Classic Cubbie homer here. I won’t be surprised if 2-3 of these Chubs pulling it off, but with all five of these players are trending in the wrong direction, 5 for 5 is a major long shot. But I’m also docking B_Don one boldness point for homerism.
Boldness Factor: 8
RotoWan: Ryan Pressly will lead the league in saves and Kolten Wong will steal 30 bases.
Pressly’s a good reliever on one of the top cheating teams in the league, so the idea of him leading the league in saves isn’t the boldest of predictions. Thankfully RotoWan has backed that mildly bold claim up with some spicy Wong boldness for your mouth. We’re talking about a 30 year old Wong who has never stolen more than 24 bases in a season, including his minor league career. This will be his first season in an organization other than St. Louis, so maybe RotoWan’s banking on more of a greenlight in 2021 with the Brew Crew than Wong’s ever had before.
Boldness Factor: 9
Cool Whip: Mitch Garver will have a better season than Will Smith.
What’s worse, a catcher question or a catcher bold prediction? Trick question, they’re both infinitely terrible like the movie Master and Commander. What was Russell Crowe thinking when he read that script?! May the Lord of Baseball have mercy on your soul, Cool Whip.
Boldness Factor: 4
Skorish: Jazz Chisholm will open the year as the Marlins starting second baseman and resolve his contact issues while breaking out to finish the year in the top 10 at the position with 25+ HRs and 15+ SBs.
Have to respect the depth of this prediction from Skorish. I mean, Jazz could open the year as starting second baseman, finish in the top 10 at the position and go 25/15, but not resolve his contact issues. In which case, Skorish loses what little credibility he has left after attempting to draft Sixto Sanchez #1 overall in his RazzSlam league.
Boldness Factor: 8
