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‘ello Razzballers! We’re almost to the halfway point of the season: the All-Star break. Who is holding everything together with a few pieces of gum and some fishing line through the end of the season (I was going to make a “MacGyver” reference here, but I started having an existential crisis about “MacGyver” being lost […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hol’ hol’ hol’ up! Jays manager’s name is John Schneider, and they just happened to find a replacement for the three-hole in their lineup named, Davis Schneider? This seems suspect! What’s also got me sniffing the waiver wire saying, “That’s fishy,” what did they put in Schneider? He’s the first player in MLB history with two homers and nine hits in his first three games. Reranking in my head for 2024 fantasy, “Acuña, Davis Schneider, Ohtani.” Davis Schneider not number one overall? No, okay? Not yet! Maybe after this week! So, Davis Schneider did all that bombing out of Fenway, and, in Triple-A, he went 21/9/.275 with a 21.9% strikeout rate. I get it, he was a bit old for the level, but, at 24, it wasn’t like he was Joey Meneses. Not to mentionese, did we forget last year with Meneses? Sometimes guys come up, and hit for two months until pitchers figure them out next year. Schneider has no prospect pedigree, but I’d grab him in any league until he stopped hitting, or until we find out he’s John Schneider’s kid, and, as we learned in Little League, he’s only hitting third because of daddy. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

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On a street corner, Arte Moreno rings a bell, “Come and get your Angels here, come and get your Angels! No one is off limits! You want Ohtani? You’re gonna have to pay the price! Say, how about you send us Brandon Marsh for Ohtani? Deal done? Terrific! What about Griffin Canning? He just threw 5 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, and had a career-high in strikeouts with 12 with an ERA at 4.52. You’ll give us ‘a disapproving look once worn by former Angels great, Ian Kinsler?’ Fantastic! He’s yours!” That’s Arte Moreno doing some trade deadline wheeling and/or dealing. Canning was a favorite of mine in previous years. Don’t look at which years it was I liked him, it’s too depressing how far back it goes. Right now, he’s having the best year of his career (9.4 K/9, 2.8 BB/9, 3.88 xFIP), and looks headed to top his career-high of 90 1/3 IP, assuming they don’t keep throwing him for 120 pitches per start, like last night. He gained an extra mile on his fastball, and getting hitters mostly with his change, that’s been outstanding. Streamonator loved him yesterday, and I can’t say I’d start him without pause, but he might finally be making good on his promise. The last piece will be him becoming a Tampa Bay Ray! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Houston relievers Rafael Montero and Ryan Pressly are scheduled to hit free agency this winter. The pair has 35 saves between them this season. Maybe Houston brings someone back. Maybe they anoint Hector Neris (or Ryne Stanek) the guy coming out of camp. Regardless of what the team does, it’s difficult to envision a scenario that excludes RHP Bryan Abreu from the ninth-inning picture, unless you’re building the scenario around injury or poor performance. Command has eluded Abreu at times, so that’s not out of the question, but you could say the same about a lot of relievers. And just so you know, this whole post idea sprung from the fact that Abreu was available in a lot of my leagues despite looking like an obvious closer in 2023 and beyond. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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And-Gim isn’t just Pam from The Office’s requested guest list plus one. And-Gim isn’t just someone remembering late their favorite characters on Taxi. “And-Gim And-Gim number nine, on the New York Transit Line, if my train goes off the track, pick him up, pick him up, pick him up! Back on the scene, crispy and clean, still 23 with an outside chance for 20/20/.300!” Okay, that last part didn’t rhyme. Yesterday, Andres Gimenez went (4-for-8, 5 RBIs and his 13th and 14th homer, hitting .312) in the doubleheader. Gimenez is averaging about four homers a month, and has seven steals already this month. If he gets ten steals in a month, well, I don’t want to wake up Mr. Prorater — “Did you know your uncle spends more time on Facebook than Jonas Salk spent on polio?” — Oh, shut up, Mr. Prorater! Andres Gimenez is in that delicate area where if he loses just a little power and speed in 2023, then he becomes a 15/15 guy and that’s a little yawnstipating, but he’s also on the precipice of becoming a 20/30/.300 guy, and that’s top 25 overall guy. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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The date is June 9, a fairly insignificant moment in the western, Gregorian sense but a potentially monumental one in the 2021 baseball sense. The ever-floating cheap prospects super two service time cutoff line is now, or tomorrow, or next week, depending on how much baseball everyone ends up playing over the next two years. It’s a ratio stat where the denominator is everyone in baseball’s service time, so to call it a “moving target” sells the math problem a little bit short. It’s guesswork. Educated, certainly, but guesswork nonetheless, and the best guesses we have point to the middle of June, maybe even June 10 in particular. 

Get your popcorn ready. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?