Please see our player page for Tyler Glasnow to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

The only reason Junis has the lede is because his name enabled the title. His points per start is piss poor at 10.25 points and it seems he must have eaten some stale matzah before Friday night’s start in New York because it was terrible. Here are my four questions. Why is this night different from all nights? It’s not. Jakob’s performance really put a damper on seders throughout the fantasy community. However… I am still a believer. In Junis that is. After all it has only been four starts. My preseason estimations had him at about 13 and change points per start, but I was/am optimistic that he’d outperform those numbers. I still think he gets there, but he has some work to do. In 22 innings he does have 24 strikeout. So there’s that. Like I said, it’s only been four starts. Look at Jameson Taillon, he’s averaging 8.75 points per start. Anyone ready to throw in the towel on him yet? I do realize that we are talking about pitchers of differing pedigree, but the point is four starts a season does not make. Instead of Junis, let’s take a look at a few starting pitchers that are off to an excellent start (pun intended).

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“After Chris Davis raved about it, I had to check it out.” said James Paxton, as he sipped maple syrup.  He continued, “It was my favorite show since the last time I saw Rush.”  The Canadian then put on moose antlers, an orange vest and grabbed his shotgun.  Before he exited the press conference, he smiled, adding, “Eh.”  So, James Paxton busted that slumped like Chris Davis before him and like every team that faces the Sawx.  Crazy when you have Mookie Betts hitting near-.200 and Benintendi out of the lineup, what a massive hole the Red Sox become, or a Mass-hole for short.  Yesterday, James Paxton went 8 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 3.91, putting to doubt some concerns that he would be eaten alive by the New York lights.  Paxton laughed, “It’s just like downtown Saskatchewan.”  All the New Yorkers grinned, Paxton was already growing a tough, sarcastic sense of humor indicative of New York, when Paxton added, “Seriously, eh, there’s nothing finer than Regina.”  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Minnesota “outfielder” Nelson Cruz ($3,900) is off to an incredibly hot start, slashing .320/.485/.520 with a 176 wRC+. The 38-year-old DH (outfield eligible on FanDuel) just continues to mash as the Twins three-hitter, a spot where he can rack up runs and RBI. I recommend jumping on the Cruz ship as he faces Aaron Sanchez, who is coming off a season with a 4.89 ERA. Until FanDuel finally adjusts Nelly’s price, we can enjoy this cruise.

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Yesterday, Tyler Glasnow like an Afrikaan miner threw a gem — 6 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 11 Ks, ERA at 0.53.  Hey, I wrote a Tyler Glasnow sleeper this year, so I’m down with TG-AF — that’s Tyler Glasnow as f**k!  Yes, I’d love to mock the Pirates for trading him away.  However, I’m not sure how much we can’t discount how Ray Searage preaches contact and is a wet blanket on Ks-slash-some pitchers, i.e., Glasnow may never have been this pitcher on the Pirates.  Then throw-in Meadows into the trade, though?  I mean, what were the Pirates thinking?  “Argh, we’re dumb.”  Pirates should be cursing themselves, which would sound like, “Plankety plank plank!”  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Not Your Grandfather’s Top 100 Starting Pitchers…

Overreaction is part of human and donkey nature. Recency bias is unavoidable. But in a world where those who adapt not only survive, but thrive, could the risks of overreaction be outweighed by the rewards of adaptation? Good question. You have a lot of good questions.

I remember a few years back when Grandpa-Donk smuggled a three pound rib-eye steak out of the grocery store under his shirt, even though he had $200 burning a hole in his pocket. Did my family overreact and make gramps come live with us? Of course not; we all had a nice laugh over some grilled rib-eye and went on with our lives.

But when Gramps-Donk caused a 12 car pile up on Dixie Highway, without a license, in a car he “borrowed” from his neighbor, that’s when we knew it was time to make a move. So we did what any good family would do and threw the old goat into that nursing home from Happy Gilmore. Adapt and thrive.

I’ll now relate this insensitive and poorly thought out analogy to starting pitchers in fantasy baseball. After a month of overreacting to mostly meaningless spring pitching performances, we finally have a two-start regular season sample for many pitchers; the March days of experimenting with drugs and new pitches are over, these guys are now trying their best to get hitters out. Two-starts may seem like a small sample, but in an age when most starting pitchers will only reach 25-30 starts, two-starts is actually 6-8% of their season. It’s time to start reassessing.

Before getting into some of my early season risers and fallers, I do want to address the Bartolo Colon sized elephant in the room: The re-juiced baseballs. Small sample sizes and that’s what she said jokes aside, I fully believe we’re headed for record power numbers this season. What does this mean for us as fantasy baseballers? I think it means the elite top tier arms are even more valuable than they already were. With a surge in power we can expect increased pitching rates across the board, meaning a guy who gives you 200 IP of sub 3.00 ERA can really move the needle. Just some food for thought as we monitor the ever changing landscape.

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After volunteering to have his first start of the season skipped last week (what a stand up guy!), Joe Musgrove opened his season with a seven inning gem, cruising through the Cinncinati Red Legs line up allowing just three hits and a walk and striking out eight for his first win of the year. Joe has always been a master with his control (just a 5% walk-rate in 2018 and he threw 18 first pitch strikes Friday night) but it’s them tasty strikeouts that make me go crazier than a shadow person in a Jordan Peele movie. The replicants have risen, and they’re here to steal all our best waiver wire acquisitions right before we’re about to click add. That’s why you have to grab Joe Musgrove while he’s still available in about 40% of fantasy leagues. Shadow Lupita Nyong’o would tell you Musgrove put up some of his best numbers down the stretch last year (August and September), when he started mixing in his off speed pitches more his strikeout rate increased as a result. She’s saying if he carries that mindset into this season he’s got all the tools to break out in a big way in 2019 and if Friday’s night performance was any indication (induced 17 swinging strikes) we’re about to see Pittsburgh’s prize from the Gerrit Cole trade finally pay off. Buy Joe Everything Musgrove!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

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If a tree falls in a forest, but no one drafts the tree does it make a sound?  That’s what it felt like this weekend at Razzball.  I’m sure a ton of people were angry that Daniel Murphy fractured his finger, but I heard nary a peep from the Razzball faithful.  I’m guessing because of where I ranked him.  According to FantasyPros, the top person ranked him 26th overall.  The worst ranking of him, and, oh, it’s just silly.  Some total numbskull ranked him 150th overall.  Wait a second, I’m that numbskull, and the awful ranking was actually him 26th overall.  I should’ve wrote an overrated schmohawk post for him, but I didn’t because I didn’t want to write this in February, “He’s old, and will get hurt.  End of post.  So, did everyone already take down their Groundhog’s Day decorations?”  I honestly couldn’t figure out why people were drafting him.  His projections were 22 HRs, .310.  I mean, okay, but kinda big whoop, no?  Meh, I guess it’s irrelevant now since I know none of you drafted him.  Right?  Riiiiiiight?  The good news is Garrett Hampson and Ryan McMahon should see more at-bats, and, just as I say that, the Rockies played Mark Reynolds at 1st base on Sunday.   Oh, Rockies, you dumb, dumb team, which is different than the creative team behind Dum-Dum lollipops.  They’re terrific.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Not Your Grandfather’s Top 100 Starting Pitchers… It was established in the first edition of 2019 Top 100 Pitchers: starting pitchers are much like grandparents. Exciting when they’re young and healthy, disheartening when they’re old and feeble. No reasonable mind would dispute the likeness between our elders and dudes who grasp and thrust balls for […]

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In case you haven’t noticed, we are now less than two weeks away from Opening Day folks. Most of you are avid baseball fanatics so I know you don’t need a reminder, but it just feels awesome to be able to say it. After another long winter the best day of the year is almost upon us. Back again to look at some discounts you might find in your upcoming drafts, here are some starting pitchers I feel like will significantly outproduce their current draft prices.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Not Your Grandfather’s Top 100 Starting Pitchers…

Starting pitchers: You can’t live with em, you can’t win your fantasy baseball league and then use the championship trophy to score babes without em. I know, you won’t be able to do that second part either way, but it’s called fantasy baseball for a reason.

Starting pitchers remind me of grandparents. Oh boy, where’s Donkey going with this one? Don’t worry Grey’s random italicized voice, I won’t get into my James Shields pants peeing analogy.

When they’re young, visits with gramps and granny are full of excitement and unexpected gifts; those times are as magical as a Walker Buehler vs. Jack Flaherty locker room sword fight. But as time passes, and our elders age, it’s not all ice cream, pizza and 13 strikeout gems. Hips are fractured and ulnar collateral ligaments are severed. The pizza and ice cream is replaced by prune juice and fruit cakes, with a side of 8 earned runs in 2/3rds of an inning.  And of course there’s the erectile dysfunction, brought on by another Tyler Chatwood misfire.

In this biweekly top 100 starting pitchers column, I’ll track developments of decreased blood-flow, fractured hips and, most importantly, those mythical GILFs (Grandmothers I‘d Like to play Fantasy baseball with; what did you think it stood for?) as they rise across the fantasy pitching horizon. Here’s a little GILF tease along with my preseason top 100 to hold all you grandmother lovers over…

Please, blog, may I have some more?