It’s not often we look to Arizona for help in the pitching department. I mean, we’ve lovingly referred to Chase Field as Coors in the desert, Coors Lite (cuz when you make a reference, it’s gotta be about beer even when it’s bad, amirite?), Rocky Mountain High at Sea Level…hrm, that last one I’ve never heard but maybe it’ll become a thing now? Whatevs, the point is, it’s a bit of a risk taking on an arm from these games because the field plays so well for hitters. Make no mistake here, there’s nothing safe about starting Robbie Ray here. His skillset doesn’t truly inspire confidence and that’s evident by his recent run. Overall, he’s a situational pitcher and that’s what has put me on him today. Prior to yesterday’s 8 run outburst, the Cardinals offense had been abhorrent of late, putting up a measly 86 wRC+ in August while K’ing 22.3% of the time. What makes Ray even more intriguing is that the Cardinals numbers vs lefties on the year are identically bad vs southpaws overall, sitting at 88 and 22.8%, respectively. You’re not looking to Ray to score you more than 30 but at his $6,300 price tag, a healthy 20 to 25 point range isn’t going to hurt you at all. And with that, let’s move on. Here’s my desert hot takes for this Monday DK slate…

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

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See all of today’s starting lineups

# MLB Starting Lineups For Sat 8/2
ARI | ATH | ATL | BAL | BOS | CHC | CHW | CIN | CLE | COL | DET | HOU | KC | LAA | LAD | MIA | MIL | MIN | NYM | NYY | PHI | PIT | SD | SEA | SF | STL | TB | TEX | TOR | WSH | OAK

I’m in New York celebrating my grandfather’s 88th birthday, or as he calls it “achy-ache,” and we started talking about Caitlyn Jenner, and he said, “She’s a hot number, I’d throw her one.”  Throw her one, I believe, means have sex with her.  I thought this was pretty forward thinking for my grandfather, then he continued, “Do you know how they put lost children on the side of a carton of milk?  I heard if Caitlyn got lost, they’d put her on a carton of Half & Half.”  Ah, there he is.  Reminds me a bit of Marge Schott, which brings us to Raisel Iglesias, who threw a gem yesterday — 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 13 Ks.  “Raise the Church” has looked far superior since he returned from his stint in the minors with an ERA that’s bordering on startable everywhere (3.93), and peripherals that look ownable everywhere (9.5 K/9, 2.6 BB/9, 3.42 xFIP).  At this point in the year, I would go one start at a time for him, but I would definitely own him, and start him for his next one.  Now, if you excuse me, I have to get back before my grandfather tries to “throw one” at Cougs.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

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I’m channeling some inner-Albright this week. Seat of your pants son! Speaking of Grey, I used the photo he took of me giving him the Larry Bird for my new avatar since it made sense to me that I should use Grey’s photo on his site. In other news, I shook up my top-100 this week as we get to the third leg of the 400-meter stretch run relay. If you’re not in the top-60, then you can be cut at any time. If you are hot, ascending, or the type of player who can go on a monster power or speed run, then I want you. Obviously, I couldn’t get everyone here, for this isn’t the Top-120, but you may notice the name brands in the bottom of the list. They are there because it’s difficult to cut some of them, but if you must, then you must.

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I must say, I don’t believe in curses, hexes, jinxes or whatever you may call it, but this season is rapidly descending into a Euripides level of despair for me. As I look at my various rosters being struck with injuries and my place in the standings perpetually falling, I’m already looking ahead to next season. With another round of injuries comes another round of drinks. Misery loves company, right?

Jeremy Hellickson, D-Backs: A strained left hamstring forced the club to shelve Hellickson for a time, as the right-hander was placed on the 15-day disabled list retroactive to August 19. The 28-year-old has had an up an down season, and I’ve been bamboozled by his strong 10.6 percent swinging strike rate not translating to a better strikeout rate. His SwStr% is tied for 25th out of 88 qualified starters, however his 7.47 K/9 ranks 38th and 19.1 percent K% comes in at 50th. I’ve been holding out hope Hellboy could get his K-rate to match his whiffs, but for now we’ll have to wait at least until the first week of September to see him back in action.

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On this fine summer Sunday I will play the role of one Captain Obvious and tell you to start the best pitcher in baseball. I don’t condone buying the most expensive pitcher of the day regularly, but today it makes sense. Clayton Kershaw‘s ($14,800) opponent the Houston Astros have been the worst offense in the league the last 14 days. Posting the league’s lowest wOBA and highest strikeout percentage. So let’s put this together and really take it over the top shall we? Best pitcher in the game vs the lightest hitting lineup at the moment, that strikes out at the highest rate. Does this sound like a buying opportunity to you? If not, you can start Michael Wacha at San Diego for $11,000, and tell all your friends that you’re too cool for aces, and that you like Wacha’s matchup better. That’s cool. Or you could start both and fill your lineup with punts and platoon guys. Funny thing is some of my best lineups have been platoons and punts.

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

All year we’ve been ranking the top prospects closest to the majors. With September call-ups quickly approaching, this post is a little different. Instead of limiting the list to players with their rookie eligibility intact, this will include any players currently in the minor leagues regardless of their at bats or innings pitched totals. There’s a catch, though. It’s only going to list players who are currently healthy and on their team’s 40-man roster. If you see a big name omitted, it’s probably because they aren’t currently on the 40-man. That can still be manipulated of course, but if a player is already on the roster, it increases the chances they’ll get a look next month. I also decided to weed through it for players that I thought could actually have some relevance in fantasy. With guys like Domingo Santana, Trea Turner, and even Aaron Altherr already up, this isn’t exactly the sexiest group. But there are some nice players in here, and if they can find playing time, they could also help your fantasy team down the stretch. When looking at who to pick up, I’d recommend focusing on teams that are out of the playoff hunt and who may be more inclined to give their younger players a look. Zeroing in on injuries (or potential ones) is also a good move. I bolded a few of the names that I think are interesting gambles…

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Mike Fiers threw the first Astros no-hitter by a single pitcher in over 20 years last night and the very first no-no in Minute Maid Park to make his way into the Houston record books, alongside Houston greats such as Beyonce, Dennis Quaid….uh, Rory Gilmore…did I say, Beyonce already? Anyway, even more impressive, the 30-year old Fiers did it against one of the leagues top offenses in the LA Dodgers. You probably wouldn’t have started Michael Fiers unless you owned @#$%ing Michael Fiers! Fiers walked just three batters and struck out 10 in what was also his first career complete game. It took Mike 134 pitches to get through this one, but his stuff seemed to get better as he got deeper into the game. It was his first win with his new team. After struggling in relief in his first appearance with Houston, Fiers settled nicely into a starting role that he will be unlikely to relinquish after last night’s dominating performance. He’s allowed just one earned run in three starts with Houston, with a 19/6 K/BB rate. Fiers struggles with control at times but when he’s on the strikeouts numbers are nice and he can be a very useful fantasy starter. He’s available in over half of leagues and gets the Yankees next week, I’d grab him if he’s out there, he could be a helpful guy to own as the Astros make their run for a pennant.

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

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You mean you didn’t learn German in High School? Hopefully you didn’t try to make sense of today’s catchy DraftKings’ title or closeout the window thinking your computer was going to crash, because today’s focus is on Taylor Jungmann. Have you wondered why the Jung portion of his name is pronounced as ‘young’? Well, the name is German. Halten Sie werfen Wärme junger Mann means ‘keep throwing heat young man’. And my friends, that is the language lesson of the day. My favorite subjects were always math, lunch, and physical education so lets move on. Taylor Jungmann’s talent is legit. He was once a top prospect in the Brewers’ organization. Seven of his last 9 outings have been Quality Starts, and he was only 1 out a way from making it 8 out of 9. He has 73 strikeouts in 80 innings pitched with a .221 BAA and a 1.12 WHIP. The road start against the Nationals might be a scary thought for your DraftKings’ opponents, but now we are all brushed up on Jungmann and know that there is a very good possibility that he could be owned at a very low rate in a big ‘Guaranteed’ entry. So lets go for the gold! He’ll make for a very nice first pitcher option at $9,600, as only being the sixth most expensive pitcher of the entire day. This’ll give you plenty of money to use on your hitters. Keep reading and check out some of my other picks for today.

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

They’re the world’s most fearsome fighting team, they’re heroes in the half shell and they’re green. When the Evil Shredder attacks these turtle boys don’t…. Oops sorry I got lost for a minute in quite possibly the greatest theme song of my childhood. Say what you will G.I. Joe fans, and followers of He-Man but the Turtles were killing the game back in the early 90’s. Maybe you’re not familiar with a little ditty called “Ninja Rap” by the God emcee Rakim Vanilla Ice! Is it bad that after watching that video I’m reminded that Ice was 100 times more legit hip-hop than Drake or Meek Mill? Seriously some solid scratches in the intro there. But that’s all besides the point, today’s post is dedicated to those down with the Turtle Power since Day One. Welcome to the sewer…Riggidy Raow! Oh snap who invited Das Efx? Sorry guys you disappeared faster than Chris Shelton’s short lived power surge. Go back down that man-hole cover. Now back to the lecture at hand, this week the tiers are all about the Turtles boi! Oh yeah and two start pitchers, because anyone reading this is in one of two positions. A. You’re in the playoffs, don’t have a bye and are loading up on the double dippers. or B. You’re making that last push to make the playoffs or lockdown that all important bye. Doesn’t matter what type of league you’re in this time of year, even roto players like myself are looking to stream and load up on starters to reach our limits after being patient boys and girls all year. So this is for y’all. Two Start Pitchers, Week 21!

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Give me a buy, a bouncy buy!  Wait, might have my Martin Short characters mixed up.  *Googling*  Damn, that was from his Irving Berlin.  Jackie Rogers Jr. didn’t have much of a catchphrase.  Last Saturday, JBJ was sworn in as the hottest schmotato in the land as Jackie O., his mother and who he was named after, held the Bible.  After the ceremony, JBJ stated, “Compared to taking a free pass, hitting is a cakewalk.”  Then he high-fived himself.  Jackie Bradley Jr.  is more or less a hot platoon player, but Cousin Sizzlechest is about as hot as they come right now.  JBJ will cool off at some point, he strikes out a bit too much, but he’s worth owning in all leagues where you’re hurting for that little extra spark.  Plus, to get JBJ on your team, you don’t need the assistance of the Cubans, the FBI, Frank Sinatra, Joe Pesci in a bad wig, a vast right wing conspiracy, Joe DiMaggio and some dude named Zapruder.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

In 1847 in Self-Reliance, Ralph Waldo Emerson said “consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds”. He actually said more than that, but I have taken just those words. Did I just start out my fantasy baseball post with a partial Emerson quote about goblins?! For some reason I apparently have. In one of my preseason rants, I said something about consistency being key. I’d much rather have a hitter that scores about the same number of points each week, than one that is hit or miss. For example, over a five week span, I’d rather have my hitter get 20 points a week than have him score 5 the first week, 45 the second week, 5 week three, 5 week four and 40 in the fifth week. While the two 40-point weeks are awesome, the 5-point weeks are awful. That might now have been the best example, but I believe it sufficient enough to get my point across.

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Tehol was enjoying Shark Week while Miguel Sano was bashing mammoth home runs a while back. Appropriately, he gave the Dominican-born Sano the fantastic nickname, “Great White.” I’ve got to say, I have been inspired by this since, and I’m determined to make it stick. I will dedicate my life to getting this nickname uttered by a nationally televised broadcast team. Okay, nicknames aside now, let’s talk about Mr. Sano. Aaron Gleeman, a Rotoworld Senior Editor and Minnesotan, has been posting an onslaught of wonderful OPS statporn related to Sano. Here’s a sampling…

Please, blog, may I have some more?