Heath Bell is giving out two run innings like he’s Daryl Hannah giving out crazy vibes. Yesterday, was the fourth time in 8 appearances this year he’s allowed 2 runs.¬† His WHIP (2.70) looks like an ERA, his ERA looks a perfect score from a corrupt figure skater judge (10.80) and the Red Sox are wondering if he can be their closer.¬† At some point, Bell should be replaced as closer, and, with the way he’s been pitching, that point was about three weeks ago.¬† Astute Razzball reader, ‚ÄúIs¬†Cishek or Mujica the replacement?‚ÄĚ¬† I thought you were the astute one.¬† Mujica looks to be the set-up man, but I think Cishek gets first crack.¬† It’s called a hunch, like how Guy Fieri eats a sandwich.¬† As of right now, I wouldn’t drop Bell, but I also wouldn’t put him in my active roster.¬† Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Juan Carlos Oviedo – MLB suspended Juan Carlos Ovideo (Leo Nunez) for eight weeks for using a fake identity.¬† No plan to suspend Heath Bell for impersonating Kevin Gregg.¬† In his time off, Leo the Lyin’ plans on snorkeling through¬†Atlantis, talking to his giant rabbit Harvey and hunting Sasquatch.
Yu Darvish – 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 9 Ks.¬† Looking like a true sterling Darvish.
Miguel Olivo – Homered, but whatever he also left yesterday’s game because his groin got injury duty, leaving the M’s summonsing Montero (who also homered)!¬† Olivo’s headed to the 15-day DL, so guess who will get 10 games played at catcher just a tad quicker now?¬† Hey, I’m smiling.¬† That feels weird.
Edwin Encarnacion – 2-for-3 with his 8th homer and 4th game in a row with one.¬† His hot hitting has my heart stopped‚Ä¶. captured‚Ä¶. arrested‚Ä¶ It‚Äôs a case of Edwin Incarceration.
Allen Craig – Look at Allen Craig strutting around with two first names while R. Kelly’s only got an initial.¬† Craig is set to return from the DL.¬† Probably won’t play 2nd base, but whatever, that’s real baseball talk.¬† He’s eligible there in most fantasy leagues.¬† He could get teen homers and a handful of steals with everyday playing time, which he should have.
Kyle Drabek – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks, as he lowers his ERA to 2.40 while striking out nearly a batter per inning.¬† I’ve told just about anyone who’s asked in the comments that they should pick up Drabek, friend.
Brad Lidge – He’s gonna miss May with hernia surgery.¬† So he went from Vertigo to Nads on a Strain.
Tom Milone – 4 2/3 IP, 7 ER in Fenway.¬† Eh, even in our deep leagues we benched Milone here.¬† Don’t hate the playa (not Spanish for beach), hate the game.
Kevin Youkilis – Was scratched with a sore back.¬† Weird, that usually happens to me with an itchy back.
David Ortiz – 2-for-3 with his 5th and 6th homers as he bats .405 with 20 RBIs.¬† Of course I should’ve just drafted Ortiz in the 2nd round instead of Giancarlo Stanton.¬† I will now lock myself in my cry closet.
Ryan Braun – 3 homers in Petco with the 2nd one being airmailed, but it still counted.
David Robertson – 1 IP, 3 Ks.¬† K-Rob’s ERA is 0.00 and WHIP is 0.91, having allowed 7 baserunners in 11 IP to go with his 18 Ks.¬† He’s owned in 12% of ESPN leagues and he’s headed for a better year than probably at least two of the starters on your fantasy team.
Patrick Corbin – 5 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 11 baserunners, 6 Ks.¬† Isn’t this Patrick Corbin guy the one Carrie bides her time with while she waits for Mr. Big to come to his senses?¬† She looks like a horse; horses are hot; what else do you need, Mr. Big?¬† Any the hoo!¬† In mixed leagues, wake me when Trevor Bauer’s called up.¬† Or even Tyler Skaggs.¬† Or Boz Scaggs.
Justin Upton – 2-for-5 with his 2nd homer and the Desmond Jennings Special, a slam & legs.¬† Call a fireplace cause Upton looks like he’s starting to swing some hot lumber!¬† Can someone give me an AM radio-style bassoon, triangle, horn?
Paul Goldschmidt – 1-for-3 with a steal as he bats .193 and hit cleanup. Pretty appropriate since he’s been dirtying fantasy lineups all year.
Justin Morneau – Left yesterday’s game with a sore wrist.¬† This Justin, Morneau’s an injury waiting to happen.
Bryan LaHair – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 5th homer.¬† For those who are like, “LaWhere did this come from?”¬† He hit 38 homers last year in the PCL.¬† Granted the PCL fills their baseballs with helium, but he’s still got power to spare.
Tony Campana – 0-for-4 with a run and a steal.¬† When he’s in the dugout, the Cubs hang him from a coat hanger and his legs continue to run.
Juan Nicasio – 6 IP, 2 ER, 11 baserunners, 4 Ks.¬† That looks about right for the line you can expect from Nicasio.¬† Maybe a touch more K and a tad less LOB.
Vance Worley – 7 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks as he was done wrong by his bullpen that gave up his win.¬† He’s probably suffering from¬†M√ľnchausen Syndrome because of the rest of the starters in the majors.
Pedro Alvarez – 1-for-4 with his 5th homer.¬† Fine, I picked him up.¬† I had a gaping hole left by Zimmerman, so, with a heavy heart, I went back to the Pedro Alvarez well.¬† The worst thing that could’ve happened was I ended up ignoring Alvarez this year because of how burnt I got last year.¬† The 2nd worst thing that could happen is I get burnt again this year.¬† Yay.
James McDonald – 7 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 10 Ks.¬† There’s the old (once-hyped) McDonald.¬† Has now strung together back-to-back solid starts with excellent Ks.¬† I don’t think he’s going to be without his hiccups.
Mike Minor – 6 1/3 IP, 7 ER, 11 baserunners, 9 Ks.¬† Speaking of hiccups, looking at Minor’s start would cure his owners of them.¬† I’m guessing with 11 baserunners, seven earned and 9 Ks through 6 and a third, he was pretty unlucky.¬† Too bad I don’t play in any FIPpin’ leagues that care about luck.