The Braves had the 5th best ERA last year in the major leagues.  That’s with a down year by Mike Minor, and injuries to Brandon Beachy and Kris Medlen.  Their runs scored were second to last in the majors.  Only the Padres’ offense was worse.  So, naturally, they trade away Jason Heyward and Jordan Walden for Shelby Miller and Tyrell Jenkins, who had a sub-5 K/9 in High-A last year. Oh…*pounds out a chicken cutlet, fills it with spinach and ricotta cheese, rolls it up, ties it with twine, bakes it on 450 for 18-22 minutes, pulls it out and breathes in the aroma* …kay.  That’s the Chicken Florentine pause.  Practiced by many, only able to be pulled off by a few.  I rarely pull out the Chicken Florentine pause, but trading a top hitting prospect that is only 25 years old, when your team is hurting for offense, is straight up baffling with a pickleback.  Are the Braves trying to bring the entire organization down to Fredi’s level of intelligence?  Did Fredi tell management that they had too many top of the order hitters (they have none) and they needed another arm (they don’t)?  Are the Braves trying to get featured in the third sequel to Major League?  I got questions, y’all!  From a fantasy perspective, Heyward’s value goes up simply because the Cardinals are a better offensive team.  Like someone doing yoga, Heyward will now be surrounded by Matts, Carpenter and Holliday.  What will Heyward produce?  Go ask the Sphinx.  One year he looks like a 30-homer hitter, another year he looks like a middle infielder with 20 steal speed.  He could be anywhere from a 15-homer guy to a 30-homer guy.  The 20 steals, now in two of five seasons, looks possible, until you see he has a year of only 2 steals.  His .271 average last year is around his career average (.262), so that seems repeatable, until you see his .227 average in 2011.  At some point, he could have a 30-homer, 20-steal top 20 fantasy season, but to say it’s definitely coming is you lying to yourself.  You already lie to yourself in other areas of your life, let’s not start with Heyward too.  For 2015, I’ll give him the projections of 91/20/75/.274/15.  Anyway, here’s some more offseason moves for 2015 fantasy baseball:

Shelby Miller – Okay, I didn’t like him this past year, but he’ll probably be a 2.75 ERA pitcher on the Braves.  I’m only slightly exaggerating when I say the NL East has two hitters in the entire division to fear:  Stanton and Harper.  And last year it was only Stanton.  Doug Fister had a 2.41 ERA last year, and he only struck out 98 batters in 164 IP.  That’s egregious, Jackie Chiles.  I’m not a huge Miller fan due to the lack of Ks (6.25 K/9 last year), and his walk rate (3.59).  However, he did pitch terrifically in September if you’re into small sample sizes — That’s what she said! Huh? — with a 1.48 BB/9 in September.  If he can hold that walk rate for 2015, he’s a top 30 pitcher next year.  I have my doubts about going that far, but I still think he gains value with this move. For 2015, I’ll give him the projections 12-9/3.52/1.23/152.

Anthony Gose – Traded to the Tigers. The Tigers grabbed Gose because they have a need…a need for speed!  This might be the best landing spot for Gose.  Not because he’ll fall into an everyday starting job, which he might, but because he’ll be able to intern for Rajai, The King of SAGNOF.  Regarding the trade, King Rajai said, “I’m going to put him in charge of an entire branch of government.  That branch is grapes, and he can hand-feed them to me.”  Gose’s fantasy value really comes down to whether or not he gets the starting job.  Right now, it looks promising, but the Tigers could still get a free agent.  If he’s starting, this will be huge and he could be a sneaky 40-steal guy.  Stay tuned.  Or not.  Your choice.

Devon Travis – Went the other way in the Gose trade.  He’s only going to be 24 years old in 2015, but for the Blue Jays that’s hella old.  They be promoting bros on the reg.  Damn, I tried drop as many outdated phrases as I could, but I came up a bit short.  Better luck next time, Grey!  And stop talking in the third person you sound like a dope!  On the fo’really, the Jays promote prospects aggressively and have Maicer Izturis plugged into 2nd base right now.  Someone on the Jays is going to pull a De Niro this offseason and tell Maicer to go check out the furs down an alleyway.  In Double-A, Travis had 10 homers, 16 steals and .298 average.  I.e., he looks like Martin Prado or Omar Infante.  I.e. Part II, More I Before E, I’m not going to be a huge fan of him in the spring, but is usable in deep leagues if he’s starting.

Michael Cuddyer – Turned down a deal with the Rockies to sign with Mets.  Cuddyer doesn’t sound Polish, but I’d like to see his family tree.  If I thought Cuddyer could stay healthy, I’d give him an outside chance at 20 homers and a .280 average.  Since he can’t, I don’t.  The last year he hit in a home park other than Coors, he hit .284 and was only 32 years old.  Now, he’s 35, injury-prone and moving to Metco.  For 2015, I’ll give him the projections of 62/15/68/.272/4.  That’s good…for a 2nd catcher.  Snap!

Hank Conger – Traded to the Astros.  Five over-the-internet dollars says Conger blossoms away from The Sciosciapath just like Napoli did. I’m not saying Conger will suddenly be a ten-team league catcher out of the spring, but I bet he plays a lot more than anyone thinks right now, and ends up a steal as a second catcher in two-catcher leagues.  He has 15-homer upside and could hit for a decent average.  Plus, the Astros seem done with Jason Castro.  This won’t be the last time I mention Conger this offseason.  Bible!

Nick Tropeano – Went the other way to the Angels in the Conger trade.  I did a quick search of what I had said previously about Tropeano, and I said in September that he could be a sleeper in 2015.  Apparently, September Grey is also running on fumes from a long season, and those fumes are of the diesel variety.  I also said back in September, Tropeano went to a technical school with Arthur Fonzarelli and Joseph Tribbiani Jr.  Interesting trivia, September Grey!  Tropeano’s Triple-A numbers aren’t terrible, but his stuff also reads more like a 6+ K/9 guy rather the 8.7 K/9 guy he was in the minors last year.  May surprise for deep leagues, but will likely go undrafted in most mixed leagues.

Tommy La Stella – Also traded by the Braves, because the Braves are pretending to have a lot of offense.  La Stella was acquired by the Cubs, which is a bizarre move for them, too.  Maybe Theo Epstein’s research shows less grounders get through when a team uses a six-man infield, and Bartman’s dog ate the fly ball research.  Either way, I think the Cubs aren’t done making moves.  (Please, Yankees, take Castro.)

Russell Martin – Signed by the Blue Jays for $82 million.  The money doesn’t mean anything for fantasy other than he’s going to make eight-two million dollars!  Are we all living in Russell Martin’s fantasy?  Is this how come he got to date my 12-year-old-self’s crush, Alyssa Milano?  Is Russell Martin our overlord?  For 2015, I’ll give him the projections of 53/13/69/.248/6 or whatever he wants since apparently we’re all living in his snow globe.

Krispie Young – Re-signed with the Yankees where he’ll act as a fourth outfielder and shield for foreign objects thrown at A-Rod.

Jeremy Hellickson – Traded to the Diamondbacks. The best way to eat a banana is if it’s dipped in chocolate.  Dipping a banana in chocolate is the baseball equivalent to pitching for the Padres in Petco.  Hellickson was just dipped in melted carob chips.  He’s better than he was, but it’s not chocolate, and after a while there’s gonna be a funky aftertaste.  For 2015, I’ll give him the projections of 11-13/3.71/1.31/142.

Giancarlo Stanton – Signed a deal for $325 million to stay with the Marlins for 13 years.  Looks like I know who’s paying for our sundaes when I daydream about our man-dates.  Was this signing contingent on the approval of all future owners of the Marlins?  We all know damn well Loria’s not going to own the Marlins for the next 13 years.  This deal reminds me of the documentary, The Queen of Versailles.  For those that haven’t see the documentary, imagine you were to install a hot tub into your Camaro, and now you have to sell your Camaro because you can’t afford the water bills.  That’s Loria.

A.J. Burnett – Signed with the Pirates.  Burnett returns to a club where he found some success and where he originally started his interminable retirement talk.  Last year, he had a 8-18 record with a 4.59 ERA, but he was a tad unlucky, and could see him bouncing back a bit with the projections of 12-13/3.87/1.31/182.  182 is his projected Ks, not projected number of times he’ll announce his retirement.

Francisco Cervelli – Landed on Pirates, and will replace Russell Martin, just as Cervelli did when Martin left the Yankees two years ago.  Geez, Cervelli, just sleep with Alyssa Milano already!

Jeff Francoeur – Signed with the Phils.  The Phillies management is so tone deaf for what they need that this is the perfect landing place for Francoeur.  He’s great with the deaf!

  1. SteveNZ says:
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    You can throw your projections away. What Heyward does next year is totally dependent on whether I draft him or not.

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @SteveNZ: Ha..stay away im going to try and get him on the cheap this year.

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @JeF With 1 F: Thats what she said

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @SteveNZ: I might have to do everyone’s projections “with Steve drafting” and “with Steve not drafting him”…

      • SteveNZ says:
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        @Grey: To be fair (to me!) not everyone sucks when I draft them. See: Abreu, Jose.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Everyone you drafted on your FCL team last year, I’d say…

          • SteveNZ says:
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            @Grey: The pain is still raw.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              You would’ve had it if you go off gallivanting!

    • Swfcdan says:
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      @SteveNZ: Not just you Steve! I’ve experienced the same steveametrics as you with Heyward.

  2. ArsAryc says:
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    I know you said slightly exaggerating, but leaving Anthony Rendon off a list of hitters to fear is criminal.

  3. Jay says:
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    Grey curious to see what you think the Yankees could acquire castro for. I’m assuming it would have to based around Sanchez and others. But I’m not sure yanks have an attractive enough offer.

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @Jay: If im the cubs i want Betances

      • james says:
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        @JeF With 1 F:

        The cubs have so many infeilders.

        Cubs currently have the following guys for the long haul: Rizzo/Vogelbaugh (1b),Baez/Russel/La Stella/Torres/Castro (trade bait) (up the middle), Bryant (3b or OF), Schwarber (c), Soler (RF or LF), Almora/Alcantara (CF). (i am skipping some nice prosects in McKinney, Eloy, ect) Pitching Arrieta/Edwards/ some other B prospects (underwood and Johnson) and back end rotation pieces.

        With all of that, They could use a 3b (if they plan on moving Bryant into a corner OF slot), and pitching prospects. They have some 2nd division type 3b prospects (candelario and villanueva), but nothing truely future impact. They have plenty of interesting arms, but nothing that projects front of the order. The bonus to all those guys is they almost all have years of team control, or team friendly contracts. So this is a team that could spend in free agency.

        Here is the thing, The cubs clearly would be willing to take on more prospects if it clears a path, but they have no real need to do it. Their system is just simply so good, they have a high upside guy at nearly every position either signed long term or still on a rookie contract. I could see a castro for a plethora of pitching prospects (starting with Severino, and adding in a few other guys), or maybe some major leaguers the yankees eat whole contracts on (such as Sabathia)

        • Montezuma's Revenge... right now says:
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          @james: NYY has to be out of their minds to lose severino for castro (but they do do things just like that, all the time)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Jay: Betances works for me… Maybe a young catcher, Yankees seem to stash those and then toss them…

  4. Phil says:
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    With Gose getting traded how much do you like Pompey?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Phil: I like a lot if he has a starting job

  5. Wake Up says:
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    “You wanna learn how to rhyme you better learn how to add, it’s mathematics…”

    Loria to Dan Jennings

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Wake Up: Loria to the ex-Jeopardy champion?

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Grey: What is loyalty?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          What is that thing in center field?

          • Wake Up says:
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            @Grey: This monstrosity was actually created by combining three of the old Jeopardy sets…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              …and all the Trebek mustache trimmings for 30 years were collected…

              • Wake Up says:
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                @Grey: …and shoved down a poor donkeycorn’s mouth, and this is what it threw up…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  …life, life, l’claim, and a unicorn with IBS…

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: that was ken jennings

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ah, my bad!

  6. Wake Up says:
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    This is pretty tight butthole…http://youtu.be/lWLleo7NKh8

    Let’s hear your favorite freestyle…post it
    (No, reading off your phone don’t count)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Wake Up: Swayverse, is in my galaxy, dung? Then Greyverse going to drop this Samsung.

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Grey:
        *clears throat, rinse, repeat…says uh-huh and yeah yeah, rinse, repeat*

        I’m that spastic bastard
        stop coming at me flaccid
        keep it hard (that’s what she said)
        like panasonic battery acid
        got that gin and tonic, that’s it…
        uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
        bring it back
        bring the beat back
        still in your area
        don’t let the fact
        that I spit on the back
        of your bomber jacket
        scaring ya?
        staring ya, down
        like the sun
        you get burned in disguise
        trick’s on you
        I rubbed spf
        in my eyes…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Fly, WU, no hiccup,
          Not in an airplane over Washington University, but that’s Wake Up…

          • Wake Up says:
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            @Grey:
            * picks up mic
            realizes that it is a supercardioid condenser beta 58
            runs away with your mic*

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              *smiles, putting a sticker that read, “supercardioid condenser beta 58” on plain old mic works again*

              • Wake Up says:
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                @Grey: *laughs out loud…literally, laughs out loud to himself, all the while knowing that the sticker will be more than enough to sell this plain old mic to Billy…stupid Billy*

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  You are a sucker, Billy Squier!

    • Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadoo says:
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      @Wake Up: nice workaholics drop there.

  7. The Big Yabu says:
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    Need some trade advice —
    5×5 roto dynasty league (all players kept indefinitely)
    I’ve got Posey and Mesoraco at C, but suffering with Jhonny at SS
    He’s offering Hanley and a prospect for Posey
    Does that sound about right to you? How good of a prospect would make it even?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Sounds evenish… See if you can get a top 25 prospect…

  8. The Big Yabu says:
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    Cool, thanks for the input.
    Quick follow-up question:
    How much better would Tulo be than Hanley? He’ll stick at SS longer, but his injury-history is scary and his numbers are SOOOO tied to Coors…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I’d prefer Tulo…How much better? I don’t know how to answer that…

      • The Big Yabu says:
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        @Grey: Would you trade Posey straight-up for Tulo? Or still want a prospect too?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          I’d take Tulo straight up, but I’d try to get a prospect too

  9. J-FOH says:
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    I posted this funny track late last night with RA

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I already love the baby production card….

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: thoughts on the song? he directed the video too

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          I like it…Is it my favorite song of all-time? Nah, but it’s cool…

  10. royce! says:
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    I was really hoping that the Padres would make a deal for Hellickson, which I suppose goes to show what passes for off-season intrigue in San Diego. Carob is disgusting, btw. I haven’t thought about it for a long time, but I have terrible memories of food that friends’ hippie parents tried to pass off as dessert. Blech.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I don’t mind carob in my first few passes through it, but the end I’m wondering if it’s cardboard… So, how was Saison?

      • royce! says:
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        @Grey: I’ve never spent so much $ on food, so I was concerned that I would feel the same way about the food as I do about higher end wine, which is basically that I don’t get it, and end up feeling ripped off. I shouldn’t have been concerned. Best meal of my life. Everything was amazing, from the lobster to the radishes, though it helped that the latter were served with, among other things, whipped buttermilk. I’d go back again…in another 10 years or so.

        The corn cheese at the Korean place was also good.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          The ol’ law of diminishing returns… I feel like that with sweet breakfast items… One half a pancake good, two pancakes, bleh… I just looked at Yelp to see how much it costs… Whoa… Ha, that is expensive! Glad it was good…

          • royce! says:
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            It was expensive and like I said I won’t be eating there or anywhere like there again any time soon but after 10 years (and more than 15 years living together), you really run out of shizz to buy each other, so blowing money on ridiculous food seems appropriate.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, that makes sense… I’d like to try it myself…Maybe ten years of you coming to Razzball, you treat me?

              • J-FOH says:
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                @Grey: speaking of food, after Thanksgiving we need to go to that mexican place downtown

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Word, for sure… I’m not a huge Mexican food fan, though…

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: trust me on this one and why not. It’s the best

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Mexican food usually is cheap, so it’s worth a chance… Unless it’s a Mexican restaurant that royce! is taking us to for our anniversary!

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: it a little more fancy, for the two of us to eat it will be like 30-40 a person.

                    its really friggin good.

                    have you tried this place

                    http://blackhogg.com

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Nah, never even heard of it, and I feel like I’m pretty plugged in to restaurants (it’s what you have after you’re married)…

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: good point about Royce! next August will be the first time we all hung out and I think he owes us at least a $20 a plate joint….I mean c’mon he drive an Audi, he can afford it. We can Skype steve in at the table for old times sake

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Oh my God, we totally have to go to lunch and Skype Steve!

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @J-FOH: @Grey: I’m probably totally jinxing myself, but if I get this job I’ve applied for (and for which I’m perfectly suited), you may not need to Skype me in…

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      You’re moving here?!

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: he’s moving here? Is this december 25th?

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Is he moving here?

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @Grey: Ha – not quite. Job is with Air New Zealand managing their in-flight entertainment content. Part of it is managing upgrades to the entertainment system on its 777 fleet. And apparently once the upgrade is ready, I’d need to fly to a bunch of Pacific Rim destinations to install the upgrade.

                    Last time I checked, LA was on the Pacific Rim. So keep your fingers crossed!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      That sounds awesome! ncsdncwkn– Oops, fingers crossed…

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @Grey: Obviously I’m getting way ahead of myself and I’m only assuming that I’d need to come to L but how cool would it be?

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Yeah, that would be terrific, I imagine you’d have a desk job though, and not flying non-stop, right?

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @Grey: Yeah, very much office-based from what I can gather.

              • royce! says:
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                @Grey: Damn, that would be soon, too…better start saving up…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  You better!

            • J-FOH says:
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              @royce!: now I’m hungry

        • SteveNZ says:
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          @royce!: Oh, man. That place just looks awesome. I’ve never even got within sniffing distance of a Michelin-starred restaurant. I don’t have a bucket list, but if I did, eating at a place like that (or The French Laundry or something of that ilk) would definitely be on it.

          • royce! says:
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            I actually tried to get in to the French Laundry. They have an online reservation system that opens 28 days in advance, so I stayed up until midnight to try to reserve something and they were immediately booked, except for like 9:30 pm, which you can probably deduce is too late for me these days, given that I just said I “stayed up until midnight.” Really pissed me off, because either they didn’t actually have any tables available (meaning that they already gave em to people more in the know than me or something) or scalpers sell the reservations, which is stupid. In the end, I’m glad we ate at Saison, though I think French Laundry is probably cheaper.

            • Kid A says:
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              @royce!:

              Here’s a short story:

              I was once at FL for a thing and Sean “Puff-Daddy” Combs (I think he was going by Puffy at the time – late 90’s) had helicoptered into Yountville and was trying to play his “big-shit” card at the door and just walk in without a reservation. Not only did they not let him in, they said it was because of the track suits he and his crew were wearing.

              Dude was crushed. I swear I saw tears.

              I got a hard laugh out of it.

              • SteveNZ says:
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                @Kid A: Not sure how you can top ‘I was at The French Laundry’ but you did. That’s a great story.

                • Kid A says:
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                  @SteveNZ:

                  Hi Steve. I miss us. Hope you’re well.

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @Kid A: All the better for seeing you in these parts. Trust you are well also.

                    • Kid A says:
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                      @SteveNZ:

                      I know it’s premature, but congratulations on the job. They’d be fools not to snatch you up.

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @Kid A: I’m not sure how they’ll feel about me taking 6 months off to focus on fantasy baseball.

              • royce! says:
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                @Kid A: Well, that makes me feel much better! Thanks!

  11. nick the dick says:
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    Yo G so I already bought tickets to this concert but then my wife goes and leaves the radio on in the car so when i turned it on today the guy says 18th caller who guesses the throwback song of the day wins 2 tickets to the old school concert. Yadda, yadda, yadda…now my seats are better and im going for free!!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      You won a radio contest? Get the hell out of here, I don’t know anyone that’s ever won one of those… Are you serious? What was the throwback song of the day?

      • nick the dick says:
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        @Grey: I kid you not my friend. ‘Throwback’ was used loosely as the song was ‘Get it on Tonight’ by Montell Jordan. My wife has won tickets on this station years and years ago but yeah im as shocked as you are!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          That’s so crazy, so what do you do with the first tickets you bought? Sell em?

          • nick the dick says:
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            @Grey: Yeah my buddies are gonna take em and ill give them a little discount as im sure my seats will be better now. Its wild cuz i never listen to the radio and it just so happened to be on at the right time.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              That’s awesome, nicely done… You’re seriously the only person I know that’s won one of those contests… Though, I wonder if it’s easier now that no one listens to the radio…

          • nick the dick says:
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            @Grey: And wild it was such an easy song to guess. You’d figure they would play an old school hip hop song to guess for this concert.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, not to mention everyone has Shazam now too… There’s no more song guessing, I thought

              • nick the dick says:
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                @Grey: yeah, is shazam that app that will tell you a song from hearing it? Wouldnt even have time to use it though i called immediately. Heard 2 seconds of the beat and was like thas god damn montell jordan!

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  HA! Yeah, that’s the app… Someone’s a big Montell Jordan fan…

                  • nick the dick says:
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                    @Grey: haha nah but you play damn near any popular 90s song and ill know it. In the words of Chino, ‘sexin picture perfect hoes like Pocahontas often, and i’d rather hear Willie Nelson than fuckin Montell Jordan’

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Ha, I hear that from Chino… I was in the US for the release of Montell Jordan’s album, that was played to death, then I lived in London right when it was released there and played to death… I got a full year of him while most only got six months…

                  • nick the dick says:
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                    @Grey: ouch, thats just too much Montell. When i think of him its always him performing at the club in Nutty Professor telling the ladies this ones for you, and fa you, and fa you…

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Haha… It gets worse, while I was in London the Spice Girls just came out, then when I returned stateside they just came out here…

                  • nick the dick says:
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                    @Grey: oh geez you couldnt catch a break huh

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Nope

                  • J-FOH

                    J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: why must you persist on bringing up the spice girls. I was living there a year after you and they were on everything. Have a bag of chips? Buy a snack? a soda? all covered with the girls. So please, tell me what you want grey?

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Ha! It’s not Sainsbury, it’s Spice Girlsbury!

  12. Jc says:
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    Whats up Grey! What do you think about the Jays signing Russell Martin? Other than last year, his numbers aren’t that impressive. I think his avg was around .230 for the last 3 years. Why offer him such a huge contract? People are saying “he makes pitchers better” is there a stat behind that? Should i just be happy the Jays went out and actually sign a FA other teams were interested in!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I think it’s a ludicrous deal

      • Jc says:
        (link)

        @Grey: lol, I feared so

    • Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadoo says:
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      @Jc: i don’t think it’s easy to define that idea, but certainly pretty much everybody agrees guys like Molina do it, so it certainly could exist in the case of other catchers (i’m sure it does, not saying necessarily that martin does)

  13. Kid A says:
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    Looks like Country Breakfast will be eating Reggie Jacksons at Lois The Pie Queen.

    Amirite or Amirite, Oaktown Steve?!?!

    *crickets*

    *sob*

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha

      • Kid A says:
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        @Grey:

        You feeling better? Those LatAm bugs don’t fuck around. Will flip you for real.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, my stomach’s on the mend… I think I just have a straight cold now, but I can see the light…

          • Kid A says:
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            @Grey:

            OK, cool. good to hear….wait…..what? see the light?!?! STAY AWAY FROM IT!!!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Oh crap, too late! By the by, the Stephen Hawking movie was great… Two electronically controlled thumbs up!

    • J-FOH says:
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      @Kid A: I predict a hometown buffett or golden corral will open within walking distance of the O.Co within the next 6 months

      • Kid A says:
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        @J-FOH:

        They’re saying he still has to pass medical.

        What does a physical look like for a guy that hasn’t seen his toes in 15 years?

        • J-FOH says:
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          @Kid A: well from prior experience, it’s a lot like 20 minutes with a street walker, degrading and uncomfortable

          • Kid A says:
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            @J-FOH: I put it on the tee and you hit a dong and waddle around the bases. Nicely done. I like when we work constructively.

            • J-FOH

              J-FOH says:
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              @Kid A: its a double dutch rudder with a danish..ooh cheese filled

    • Pappy says:
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      @Kid A: Better get yourself some of that sweet potato pound cake while you still can.

      • Kid A says:
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        @Pappy:

        So good. So Oakland. You been to The Fremont Diner up in Sonoma? Go if you haven’t.

        • Pappy says:
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          @Kid A: You are the second person today to bring up the Fremont Diner, guess I better get my ass over the hill quick-like. I split my time between West Sonoma county and Oakland, the perfect mix of green and gold. I miss OTS.

          • J-FOH

            J-FOH says:
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            @Pappy: I’ve been emailing him. He will be back

  14. PK says:
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    I feel like Heyward’s speed will evaporate in St. Louis. The Cardinals only had one player with double-digit steals last year (Wong with 20 in 402 ABs), and one in 2013 (Jay with 10 in 548 ABs). Mike Matheny seems allergic to base running.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Did they have guys that had speed that didn’t run?

      • PK says:
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        @Grey: I guess Jay and Bourjos were their fastest guys besides Wong.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Jay’s not particularly fast, he stole 19 bases the year before under same team management… Bourjos had a year to forgot… I’m not worried about them not running…

        • Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadoo says:
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          @PK: yeah, and jay ain’t fast. bourjos had few at bats.

  15. Wilson says:
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    Hi Grey, after the big deal to Stanton, am worry about his Slackness.
    Pick the best one to keep for 2015.

    Stanton , Kershaw , Abreu

    Thanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Stanton

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ugh, that’s depressing… Is there any 80s pro wrestler who had a happy ending?

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: I’m sure lots of them got them on the road as they went to the Lotus Flower Spa

    • Big Magoo

      Big Magoo says:
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      @J-FOH: Steve Austin interviewed him a couple of months ago on his podcast. It seems like he was a nice guy who had no business savvy whatsoever and got taken advantage of in a regular basis. It’s sad to see the condition that he’s in these days.

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Big Magoo: It sucks. I usually don’t give excuses for lack of education. I wish I had the money, I would buy a chair from him to support the cause.

  16. Big Magoo

    Big Magoo says:
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    The slow mock that Sky is in the middle of right now has featured some interesting picks. Ozuna got sniped out from under him early in the 5th. I wonder if he would’ve taken him over Bruce with the next pick…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Oh yeah? I haven’t seen… Link?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          This site looks like Geocities smoking crack…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Wow, he took Arenado early…

          • Big Magoo

            Big Magoo says:
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            @Grey: Yeah, 42nd overall for Arenado is pretty aggressive. Sky seems to be assembling quite the boom/bust squad.

            Altuve in the 1st. Harper at 13th overall. MadBum in the 2nd. Waino and Darvish remain on the board late in the 5th. Interesting stuff.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              I wonder what Harper would have to do to get knocked down in a draft… Maybe run though one’s living room wall… Altuve’s way too aggressive there

              • Big Magoo

                Big Magoo says:
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                @Grey: There might be some analysis coming on Harper in the coming weeks. If only a picture would get cropped…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  I believe Tehol has been scouting Harper’s workout routine…Says he’s buffer than ever!

                  There’s online image croppers…

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: I’m still waiting for the bicep size to home run total chart.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Ha

                  • Big Magoo

                    Big Magoo says:
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                    @Grey: Yeah, I’m sure there are dozens of programs out there that would get the job done. It’s just unfamiliar territory for me. I’ll figure it out.

                    There’s always someone who will reach for Harper’s upside. Probably be an offseason piece about how he strengthened his glutes or something.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Glutes of steel!

                      Just send me the pic you want used, WordPress will crop it for you…

                  • Big Magoo

                    Big Magoo says:
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                    @Grey: Sounds good. I’ll give it the ol’ college try and send it over to you if it doesn’t work out.

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @Big Magoo: God its hard to even tell what your looking at on that site

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Haha

          • Big Magoo

            Big Magoo says:
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            @JeF With 1 F: Yeah, it’s a hot mess. Easier to follow if you look at the draft chart page.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
      (link)

      I liked Ozuna where he went in drafts for 2014, I’m not a fan where he’s going right now. I think he’s ‘capped’ a bit with what you got in 2014. Too many buyers at that price expecting emergence.

      I have Nolan tabbed as a top 50 player for 2015, personally. I was higher than most on him in 2014 – as you probably remember – and think with better health we see something closer to a .300 and 25 HR season with 90 runs, 100 RBIs.

      Without a bench, I felt there was no need to set to the side and let the guys you want go by. So far, I feel like I have 2 potential top 10 guys (Abreu/CarGo) and two top 25 guys in Bruce/Frazier. I don’t plan on taking pitching minus closers until much later. It should be an interesting draft; I have quite a few guys queued up later and am having trouble deciding what round 6 should be. I don’t really like the options that are out there.

      • Big Magoo

        Big Magoo says:
        (link)

        @Sky: I agree with you on Ozuna. People seem to be expecting a step forward. Kind of like Myers from this past season. A bit pricey in the 5th.

        I like Arenado too, just shocked to see him go in the 4th. Thought he might be more of a 6th rounder. I could see him returning that value though.

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Ozuna wasn’t even a prospect on Myers’ level so it makes it even more crazy to me. Gotta hope the steals see an uptick and the BA for his price in my book. If not, he’s a solid .260-.270 hitter with 20-25 HR potential…or as I like to call him, Marlon Byrd.

          As I was mentioning to Grey, it was more of the fact I didn’t see any upside in the arms or the bats around him there. Maybe I could’ve reversed Arenado for Bruce but I got them both so I’m happy either way.

  17. birrrdy! says:
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    One hundred thirty-seventh!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha

  18. J-FOH says:
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    HAHA, caught you on the football side.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Yeah, just saw Duvall’s movie the other day… A real POS in more ways than one… Stephen Hawking movie was solid (saw it last night)…

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: I’m so behind on movies these days. I still haven’t sen Nebraska. But on the flip side I got baby’s mama to watch Silicon Valley over the last two days. So damn good

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Nice… Nebraska is on Netflix this month… It was solid, worth watching… Whiplash was still the best movie I’ve seen this year…

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Grey: who is in that?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              JK Simmons and Miles Teller

          • Big Magoo

            Big Magoo says:
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            @Grey: Did you check out that Goodfellas documentary? You too, J-FOH. I saw your recent pro-Goodfellas comments…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA! Mr. Clean owes a nickel to D’Angelo… BTW, someone mentioned your mock draft above…

      • Sky

        Sky says:
        (link)

        Magoo! I’m happy with the draft so far. Will probably be veering into a closer in round 6. Round 7 will probably be a guy I heart more than others and be another ‘shocker’. I’m pretty much ignoring any guy ranked in the top 100 at this point minus closers if they fall to me.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Yeah, I don’t have any real qualms with your draft… Scary where Arenado is going, but I don’t imagine he’d hang out that much longer, maybe another round to 20 picks, but in that area prolly… Which sucks, I want him later…

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            Yeah, just looking around the guys who went near him in the 4th or late 3rd, I think I only liked Kemp. Maybe Yoenis but I have some OF plans for later so I wanted to shore up my UT with a CI. He’ll probably be ranked top 75, maybe top 60. But he’s #1 in my heart!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Yeah, it’s hard to not like a young hitter in Coors… After taking Frazier? Eh, maybe not so much, but I ain’t hatin’ I’m libertain’!

              • Sky

                Sky says:
                (link)

                Yeah, gotta fill your UTIL with something was my thinking. Looking forward, the pitching is what made me aggressive with him. Felt more wiggle room with arms than I did bats I liked but thanks for bra burning with me!

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Yeah, to play devil’s advocate, you could get Arenado later than you took him…

                  • Sky

                    Sky says:
                    (link)

                    It was more of not liking what was available. If I had taken Bruce then and Arenado in the 5th, is it the same conversation? I figured people would steer clear of Bruce so I wasn’t worried about missing out.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Honestly, that site hurts my eyes, so I’m not sure what else you could’ve taken, but I see putting Bruce in front of Arenado (coming from someone who really hasn’t ranked anyone yet)….

                    • Sky

                      Sky says:
                      (link)

                      Yeah, that’s all I meant. I felt both were gonna be fair game but Nolan was the buzzier guy for 2015 so I rankingly (totally a word) swapped them.

                      And yeah, This site looks like someone took a light bright and decided that was good website design…then ripped off the damn black paper.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      I bet the owner of that site is on LSD every day.

                    • Sky

                      Sky says:
                      (link)

                      He can taste the colors.

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            But more to the point. Dat Mr. Clean…woah.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              That video for Cougs is better than a dozen roses!

              • Sky

                Sky says:
                (link)

                I am sad they didn’t have ‘So Fresh, So Clean’ by Outkast playing in the background. Opportunity missed.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Roses by Outkast is the jammy jam.

                  • J-FOH

                    J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: both are great cuts, here is one of my favs, the content has nothing to do with why I like this song. The hook is redonk to the cronk. #offseasonslang

        • Big Magoo

          Big Magoo says:
          (link)

          @Sky: Your team looks good. If everything works out, it could be a runaway train with what you have so far. Not sure I trust CarGo with a top 20 pick, but he could certainly pay off big. Even if Frazier goes .260/25/12, he’s still worth a 3rd rounder, and if he repeats last year’s performance, you got a steal. Not sure why people would downvote that pick.

          Chapman in the 6th and Chris Davis or Wong in the 7th. Am I getting warm?

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            Yeah, problem I just saw a lot of safe in the 2nd with very little room for upside that I couldn’t find later. Rendon was my maybe pick there, I went with the 30/20 potential. RE: Frazier, I just went with what the crowd was giving me and with what you said.

            We don’t have a bench so no Davis. I like Wong but I think he’ll go late enough I don’t have to swing for him there but you’re warm with Chapman!

            • Big Magoo

              Big Magoo says:
              (link)

              @Sky: Yeah, I hear ya on CarGo. Just the durability issues and increasing K-rate worry me about him. Huge upside though, as always with him.

              Darvish, Dee Gordon, or an elite RP look like solid options in the 6th. Huge K boost with Darvish (just have to be wary of his health issues) and solid value with Gordon even if he regresses to .275 with 85 runs and 45 SBs. I love those speedy MIs. Of course, Chapman, Holland, and Jansen are all beasts, so you couldn’t go wrong with them either.

              Myers, Yelich, or Soler in the 7th? Sounds like you’re looking upside there…

              • Sky

                Sky says:
                (link)

                I’m angling it was a down year to be on the Rockies in general but I hear ya. I just didn’t want 4th round value in the 2nd, which is what most of the players felt like to me.

                6th – I have my eyes on MI later in the draft, it’ll probably be a high end RP. Darvish intrigues but like the later arms who don’t have the health concern after how he ended 2014.

                7th I am going upside but I’m going after it in a guy many don’t see the upside in. It’ll probably look nuts in November and a bit more sane by June.

                • Big Magoo

                  bigmagoo says:
                  (link)

                  @Sky: Well, I guess I’ll have to wait a week to see who you grab in the 7th but I’ll be keeping an eye on it! Good luck.

                  • Sky

                    Sky says:
                    (link)

                    Haha it’s definitely a slow mock!

  19. Kid A says:
    (link)

    You recommended the Hawking movie so I went and saw Birdman.

    You catch it yet?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I think we have a screening of that in two weeks… Whiplash was the best movie of seen this year so far…

Comments are closed.