by: Grey
[shakes up a sparkling water, cracks open the bottle and sprays strangers on the street] This Excitement Facial is courtesy of Soderstrom! Why the anger? An Excitement Facial is something you want to take part in and is extremely fun! Geez, sorry, you don’t have to punch me! When the creator of the Soderstrom sold […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Tanner Houck went 2 1/3 IP, 11 ER, ERA at 9.16, and I don’t care how you “fantasy baseball.” You can “fantasy baseball” by drafting catchers early. You can “fantasy baseball” by taking pitchers early. You can “fantasy baseball” by not wearing pants. I do not care. But if you “fantasy baseball” and did not […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Singing “Jung Hoo” to Stevie Wonder’s Jungle Fever. I got Jung Hoo fever, She got Jung Hoo fever, We’ve got Jung Hoo fever, we’re in love. She’s gone Korean boy crazy, I’ve gone Korean boy crazy– [the Cancel Police take a batter ram to the door, charge in and drag me away] It’s okay! Stop! […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
I hold a few blades a grass up, then toss them to test the wind. They just sorta fall to the ground and I’m not sure what that tells me. People in the stands are confused why I’m testing the wind to hit a baseball. I don’t know myself, to be honest. I step into […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
David Festa will start today for the Twins, and there’s rumors that Zebby Matthews will be called up this weekend to take part in a six-man rotation. Or as Lionel Richie would say, “We’re going to Party, Zebby, Festa, forever. Come on, and sing my song!” Lionel Richie is a big-time fantasy baseball guy, by […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Having a normal one: when I think about how I drafted Gunnar Henderson instead of Corbin Carroll pic.twitter.com/D5lH8sD9zi — Razzball (@Razzball) April 9, 2025 Yesterday, Corbin Carroll (2-for-4, 2 runs) hit his 5th homer. Meh, only five more homers than Gunnar, en bee dee. “No reason to panic,” he says while sobbing and plunging into […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Yesterday, Kyren Paris (1-for-3, 2 RBIs) hit his 3rd homer. At the worst, a hot schmotato. At the best, he’s hosting the last Olympics in his brain and we’re all Raygun. At most realistic, he’ll be hot for a few weeks until teams figure him out. At the most illuminating, I just realized Gaylord Perry […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?It’s not that I didn’t like Hunter Greene (8 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 1.31) in the preseason. I liked him too much. Okay, that’s a lie. It wasn’t too much, but it was, “I like him with reservations.” Not as in, “I like him and want to take him […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Rockies are eligible for an extra draft pick if Zac Veen or Chase Dollander (more on him in a second) finish top three in the end-of-the-year awards, because they were called up within two weeks of Opening Day. So, the Rockies could manipulate their service time and still get rewarded with picks. Sounds dubious, as […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
When the Netherlands landed on the ABC islands in the Caribbean, the Dutch made three requirements of all people, when farting in bed, pin the sheet tightly to the bed surface to not let any smell emit; all restaurant checks must be split in half with all attending parties, and, finally, all names must have […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
The most homers by a Yankee in his first 1,000 games was Babe Ruth, he had 321 homers. Yesterday, Aaron Judge (3-for-5, 2 runs, 4 RBIs) had a slam (5) and legs (1). He now has 999 games and 320 homers. This is a damn good time for a damn. A day-um, even. I’m trying […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?I don’t drink. Not like I’m an alcoholic, I’m not in AA, making amends for the people who drafted Rougned Odor way too high in 2017. He was very good in 2016, I cannot help that his BABIP plummeted. I did nothing wrong. See? No amends! I mention I don’t drink in a longwinded way […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?