by: Grey
Some pitchers have a “Hitters can’t get comfortable against them” quality. Whether it’s fear that they’re going to get hit because of the pitcher’s lack of control or if it’s the movement on the stuff, it’s a quality that I don’t think any stats measure well. Lack of command + Nastiness = Uneasy. The only […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
On the podcast the other day, I compared Jordan Westburg to Bo Bichette, and BDon stopped the podcast, called his job and told them he needed two years off to organize a music festival called, “Grey’s Finally Admitted About Overrating Bo-Chella.” At Bo-Chella, as it will be known colloquially, the headliners will be Jordan Westburg, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Jack Leiter (3 2/3 IP, 7 ER) made his debut yesterday, and his stuff looks primo nasty with a side of broccolini cause homeboy is green. Jack Leiter also looks like he can’t control anything. Just chucking the ball five inches off the plate for the entire outing. Wonder if his father Al doesn’t like […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Ya know how they used to say a complete game under 100 pitches was a Maddux? Well, kids, the only way a pitcher is ever throwing a complete game again is if it’s under 100 pitches. A complete game equals Maddux. There’s no non-Maddux complete games anymore. Right? I’m not being coy. Can’t imagine any […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Dodgers called up Andy Pages (1-for-4, 1 run) But, for all you Anglo em-effers, it’s Pagés. As in, “I shot an elephant in my Pagés.” “How did the elephant get in your Pagés?” As in, check out my pee-jays — [walks out in feety pajamas that are all pink and have a bunny tail] If […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Yesterday, Jonatan Clase (1-for-4, 1 RBI) was called up by the M’s with Canzone hitting the IL. Jonatan’s name cracks me up. Imaging the nurse filling out the birth certificate, “Jonathan with an H?” “Honatan? No. What are we, stupid?” So, Jonatan has lightning-fast speed. He just ran into your room, moved your inkwell and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Wanna quote myself for my biggest mention of Colton Cowser (1-for-3 and his 4th homer, hitting .441) this past preseason. I drafted a 15-team mixed league team in November, and took as my 5th outfielder, Colton Cowser
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
In his village of Cambio, Venezuela, every family had multiple changes of clothes, had change for a peso everywhere they went and the city’s favorite TV show was RuPaul’s Drag Race because of how well the contestants would change before our eyes, Ronel Blanco was raised in this culture of change from his crib to–Kidding! Come on! There’s no way I’m doing a lede Buy for Ronel. Mr. White’s the biggest sell in history! No, this is a buy about a guy who the doorman to Superstardom says, “Hey, man, I can just hold the door open for you, you don’t need to keep knocking.” That man standing at the door to Superstardom for some time is Alex Kirilloff.
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Yesterday, Hunter Brown (2/3 IP, 9 ER, ERA at 16.43) reinvented doomscrolling. Doomscrolling is now the act of frantically searching your fantasy teams to see if you have Hunter Brown anywhere. I literally dropped him the day before this start to pick up Brandon Marsh and now I am forever indebted to Brandon Marsh. I will be sending Brandon Marsh a ham for Christmas. I won’t even make a bad pun on the attached card wishing him a Happy Christmarsh.
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Yesterday, was National Sibling Day and Josh Naylor (2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 3rd homer) and Bo Naylor (2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 2nd homer) showed us what it means to be a brother. A brother’s bond is an unshakeable promise to always be there for each other. I can think of two sets of Gallagher brothers alone that show this: Liam and Noel Gallagher, who found an Oasis in the desert of 90’s rock, and Leo and Ron Gallagher, who showed us there was room on a watermelon for more than one sledgehammer.
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
The Orioles are calling up Jackson Holliday. To back up Ramon Urias? To work on fielding drills with Jorge Mateo? I don’t get it. He wasn’t ready 11 games ago, but he’s ready now? Hunh, weird stuff, right? So, Jackson Holliday is going to be a star.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Framber Valdez is out with a sore elbow. Feel a bit like I’m living in a Twilight Zone, where I say in the preseason, “Don’t draft (pitcher’s name) because they were injured last year or just so awful last year they must’ve been injured,” then everyone ignores that and pretends that a player’s injury is […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?