If I were the type to gloat, I’d say I told you to not draft David Wright. I’m not that type of fantasy baseball ‘pert though. Nah, I simply get satisfaction from not owning him anywhere and watching as teams that do own him scramble looking for replacements. ….Okay, it’s similar to gloating, but it’s not the same thing. With his sudden proneness for injuries, Mets fans may reflexively be chanting ‘Larry’ when he comes to bat now, which may not be for a while since he has a fractured pinkie. He’ll need to wear a splint and the Mets are saying he’s out indefinitely, but we’ll know more later today. In the meantime, the Mets pitching coach will be teaching Wright how to throw a splint finger. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Mike Morse – Shutdown after having renewed pain in his lat. There’s no timetable for his return. Real World Situation Alert: Your boss at Shakey’s says he appreciates the way you put the “Happy Birthday” messages on the giant billboard out front, but there’s no timetable for a promotion. How does that make you feel? Okay, now how do you feel about Morse?
Clayton Kershaw – 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks. I miss owning him. That is all.
Andre Ethier – 2-for-4 with his 2nd homer in as many games. I’m not saying he’s not bouncing back and I’m not yelling fire in the theater of Razzball, but he did hit .385 last April. Things that make you go hmm…
Austin Jackson – 1-for-2 with a homer, now batting .563 with a downright weird BABIP over .750, which has Jackson’s owners saying keep Austin weird.
Neftali Feliz – 7 shutout innings (6 baserunners, 4 Ks) in his first start (albeit against the Mariners). The Rangers convert relievers better than missionaries convert natives.
Edwin Encarnacion – 2-for-3 with the home run and 2 steals, which I guess is a slam and legses. Legii?
Kyle Drabek – 5 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks. With starts like this he should stay in the Blue Jays rotation, but remember he’s got potentially-yet-to-be-unrealized-potential-that-might-not-be-potential-anymore potential. The potential is there, though.
Matt Moore – 6 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners (5 walks), 4 Ks. You have a team that has a leadoff hitter hitting over .500, Miggy and Fielder hitting over .400 and you give 5 walks… Yeah, I’d be happy with only two earned runs too.
Dustin Moseley – His MRI revealed that his shoulder has extensive damage. And that’s how one goes from a Hodgepadre to an “Oh Fudge” Padre.
Carlos Beltran – Hit his 3rd HR of the year. Must be the combination of knowing he’s not a Met and won’t have to face Wainwright’s curve ball.
David Freese – 3 HRs and 10 RBIs now in 6 games. He’s going to be pissed with that hypnotist when there’s no champagne in the clubhouse after their next win.
Lance Berkman – Says he has a tender calf. Aw, ain’t that sweet? He should sing it lullabies. He also said he should be ready to go by Friday.
Sergio Santos – Cordero will get saves until Saturday because Santos has been excused to attend the birth of his first child. I hope his wife’s not counting on him to save any mementos from the hospital.
Daniel Bard – 5 IP, 5 ER, 9 baserunners, 6 Ks. Just when Sale and Feliz get you excited about converted relievers… On the plus side, he only walked one and struck out 6. If he keeps his walks down like that, he might actually pitch some quality starts. Of course, he won’t get any wins because the bullpen will blow them.
Kyle Lohse – 6 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 2 Ks. Member what I said last week about him being a solid pitcher in April and May? Yup.
Jayson Werth – 4 for 5 against the Mets. 3 singles, 1 double. Must’ve been his brother Laynce in the stands that inspired him to such heights.
Ross Detwiler – 5 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 6 Ks. He was recommended in our two start pitcher post on Saturday. The blurb about Detwiler made me laugh, too. My loud high-pitched annoying laugh that you’ll be hearing more of later today with our newest podcast.
Ian Desmond – 2-for-4 with a homer. His owners probably can’t wait until he cools off so they can drop him.
Chipper Jones – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and a homer in his first game back. Otherwise known as the game before he’s injured again.
Tyler Pastornicky – 1-for-3 with his first home run. Aren’t you glad you punted shortstop and grabbed Pastronicky or Cozart late? Yeah, I know. Thank me later.
Lorenzo Cain – Left yesterday’s game with a groin strain. Usually when one of my guy’s gets injured I get sullen — despondent even! — but, uh, guess who gets more at-bats if Cain is injured? The ultimate in SAGNOF — Bourgeois!
Blake Beavan – 6 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks. That’s nice; I wouldn’t go near him.
Jordan Schafer – 3-for-5, 2 runs and 3 SBs in 5 innings against Hanson-McCann. The last time someone stole that much from a Hanson was this chick who stole the Hanson drummer’s virginity during the MMMBop tour.
Chris Narveson – 5 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks. Chris Narveson isn’t just The Noid’s Christian name, he’s also a pitcher who I like for certain matchups. Should be good for a 7+ K-rate and a just-under 4 ERA.
Edinson Volquez – 7 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks. I wouldn’t say I like Edinson for matchups. I’d say I like him for all leagues. He’s in a terrific pitching park where his walks won’t haunt him as bad, get on board!
Derek Jeter – 2-for-6 with a homer the day after going 4-for-4. Looks like someone’s hitting the Carrow’s for the Early Bird Special. Minka used to love his enlarged pro stats.
Danny Duffy – 6 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners (1 hit), 8 Ks. Granted, it was against the A’s, who have hitters that their own mother wouldn’t draft, but Duffy looked solid but wild. That is his downfall as of right now, “solid but wild.”
Vladimir Guerrero – In police custody after a bar brawl in the Dominican Republic. Guerrero said he had nothing to do with the inciting argument and that he was just the designated hitter.
