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Burps for five minutes, then sloppily places a lei on a waitress. Unable to resist the primal urges of being drunk and a man, he leans in to kiss the waitress, but, before landing the smackeroo, two bouncers drag him out of the tropical-theme bar and grill. As he’s dragged by the elbows, he screams, “Your burgers at Islands suck!” A very somber Eric McCormack enters, and we see it’s a PSA. Eric addresses the camera, “This is what happens when you have too Manny Pina’s.” Yesterday, Manny Pina went 3-for-6, 3 runs, 6 RBIs and his 8th and 9th homer. I’m really starting to come around on the idea presented by a commenter that said instead of drafting a catcher, you draft a team and get that team’s catchers. Like drafting a defense in fantasy football. Also, in this game, that was Kyle Hendricks’s worst nightmare (4 IP, 9 ER,, ERA at 4.15), Jace Peterson (5-for-5, 3 runs, 4 RBIs) came a triple short of the cycle. Hendricks’s previous worst nightmare was getting caught in an elevator with a hungry Daniel Vogelbach. That’s every player’s worst nightmare. Moving on! The other big star yesterday was Luis Urias (5-for-6, 5 runs, 5 RBIs) hit his 15th and 16th homer, and I just added him to the Buy column coming later today. Pretty goofy that he’s only rostered in 30% of leagues. On the Player Rater, Christian Yelich is over two hundred spots lower in value than Luis Urias. Take me to the top of a 100-foot wave in Nazaré, Portugal and throw me into a barrel. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Dinelson Lamet went 2 IP, 0 ER, 4 Ks as he was activated from the IL, and left with forearm tightness as he heads back to the IL. Last time I wrote about him, I wrote, “Will make season debut today or tomorrow, which puts him on pace for Tommy John surgery on May 12th, give or take three days.” And that’s me predicting the woefully obvious! I might’ve overestimated how long he’d stay healthy. The Padres should trade their trainers back to the Mets. Lamet could already be six months into his Tommy John rehab. Now he’s on pace for throwing a game when, August 2022? Could’ve been April 2022 if they would’ve reacted promptly. There’s no excuse. Sorry, if they won’t be the grownups, I will! Send him for surgery and bring up MacKenzie Gore! No one wants Dr. James Andrews to purchase a hot tub that fits inside his other hot tub like he’s got the Inception of hot tubs designed by Xzibit, but Lamet’s surgery needs to happen! *Grey angrily takes a bite out of laptop, sparks fly* Let’s go! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ah, injuries!  If you have a single fantasy baseball team that hasn’t been hit hard by them already this year, consider yourself lucky. I’m not sure how I forget every off-season just how brutal it feels to finally have baseball up and rolling, only to see players inevitably drop like flies, destroying six months worth of planning, hoping, and dreaming of fantasy glory.  I’m not sure which is worse, when a key player that was firing on all cylinders suddenly and unexpectedly officially hits the IL (Lance Lynn, um, what?!) or having to navigate vague reports about top studs without knowing whether they’ll miss a game or two, or be down for a huge chunk of the season.  I’m getting absolutely crushed with injuries in a few leagues as I’m sure many of you are — and, as we deep leaguers know all too well, an injury that’s a big bummer in a standard league or an RCL-type format, can be an absolutely crippling tummy punch in NL or AL-only, or other ultra deep formats.  I already know I’m going to have to play this week seriously short-handed in a few leagues because the weekly waiver deadline has come and gone, and/or there is almost literally no one available in the free agent pool who’ll get more than a handful of bats over the course of the week.  I’m still going to fight for every counting stat I can, though, because these are the same leagues that often somehow manage to come down to a single steal or a couple RBI making a difference in the final standings come late September.  This week, we’ll stay true to the RITD spirit by focusing on players that were recently added to teams in some of my deepest leagues or made CBS’s “most added” list while still being only a few percent owned — guys who are off the radar to most of the fantasy baseball world, but might just be able to help fill out a banged-up deep league lineup.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH OR $13/MONTH WITH AN EXTRA WEEKLY PODCAST.)

I remove my Christian Door glasses, an offshoot of Christian Dior I was told, to study the side of the colonic box. Reading the instructions, “Take two of these pills, drink sixteen cups of coffee, place yourself on top of your toilet, flush every three minutes until you no longer hear the sound of Niagara Falls.” Hmm, interesting, I ponder thoughtfully, as I’m known to do. Then I say to the pharmacist, “What if instead of streaming out my butt, I’m streaming out of my outfield?” He points towards waivers, where there’s a Kelenic. Excellent, a holistic treatment! My hippie mother will be happy to hear it! Jarred Kelenic is up…Dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot…Now? Okay, was trying to stall, but he’s coming up any day now. You need to grab him in all leagues. I see he’s at 48% rostered, and he should be at a hun’dit. He could be a top 20 outfielder this year. We’re talking a guy who could be 24/17/.280 in five months. Otherwise known as what you want from Randy Arozarena. Side note: What’s funny is I wrote the preceding, then went to look at what I wrote back in November, and here’s November Grey, “What if I were to tell you Jarred Kelenic could be next year’s Randy Arozarena? I’m kidding, it’s just funny to overhype some guy by comparing him to a guy with, like, twelve games played. But, seriously, would Randy Arozarena 2021 interest you? Still joking. Kelenic has bigger power than Randy. Blasphemy! But it’s true.” And that’s me quoting me! Get this Kelenic in your system and stop streaming. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The bomb to right-center, his fourth homer of the year, wasn’t even the most impressive thing Shohei Ohtani (3-for-5, hitting .364) did yesterday. He beat out a single to short with a sprint speed of 29.5 ft/sec. That’s the 5th best Sprint Speed this year, just a bit better than Ronald Acuña Jr. Uh…*looks around for forty-five minutes, looks back*…Is anyone else seeing this? Can Acuña, serious question, also throw 101 MPH and have an under 2.00 ERA? Yo, is Shohei Ohtani really Roy Hobbs? ACKCHYUALLY If you had Roy Hobbs hit a 460-foot homer, beat out a grounder to short and pitch 101 MPH speedballs, you’d be like, “I appreciate the love story, and the friendship he built with the cross-eyed bat boy that he saved from a burning supermarket, but the baseball stuff isn’t believable in this movie.” Ohtani is not believable. That’s it. He’s one of the best baseball players ever, tools-wise. Truly not believable how good he is at each tool. Unfortch for fantasy, the Angels insistence on him pitching is hurting his overall fantasy value. Sorry, I’m not being a giant idiot. I mean, I might be a giant idiot, but not in this case. You miss a game or two each week as a hitter, and your stats are going to suffer. Hopefully, he has three months’ worth of Rich Hill blisters and can’t pitch all year. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Did you know Huascar Ynoa signed as a 16-year-old, when he was likely 10 years old, because the Braves scout players when they’re in Latin American T-ball? “The kid throws 97 as an 8-year-old, we might want to throw $500 his family’s way so he signs with us for twelve years.” That’s a Braves scout. By the way, according to prospect grades, Latin American T-ball is comparable to Double-A. If Huascar would’ve held out, he would’ve been a 1st round draft pick and everyone would be crazy about him. Ya know? Yeah, ya know Ynoa. He’s on the list of the top ten velocity increasers this year, up to 96+ MPH on his fastball, and he has two pitches — an 85 MPH slider is the other. Both are wipeout, bye-bye, ‘say hello to your mother for me’ type pitches. Yesterday, he had the most Ks for a 22-year-old Braves pitcher since 2013 (Teheran), going 6 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 0.75. With two pitches, he could get some mileage around the league once, twice, three times a Ynoa, or be out of the rotation in a few weeks. Absolutely would grab him in all leagues to see if he can keep it up each time around the track.

Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Early on Saturday, I heard the news that Jay Bruce made the Yankees’ Opening Day roster, and I was like, “Cool, if this is 2012.” Then I thought, “Is this 2012? Am I time traveler?” Turned out it was not 2012, and I was not a time traveler. Double bummer there. Somehow, Jay Bruce is still only 33 years old, so he might be a time traveler. After my brief flight of fancy through a time portal that didn’t exist, I thought, “That sucks, keeping Bruce over Tauchman. He can’t catch a break. That’s not the bee’s knees, that’s BS.” Then I thought, “I can just curse in my own head, I don’t need to spell out BS.” Then, out of nowhere, I saw the Yankees were keeping Mike Tauchman on the Opening Day roster too, and things began to peel away from my very logical brain. How were the Yanks keeping three 1st basemen? Was everything fine with Luke Voit? Welp, turned out it wasn’t. The Yankees were watching a triple feature of Luke Skylimper; Luke Cool Hand, But Torn Meniscus and Luke Voit in Meniscus Cowboy. After disowning Angelina Jolie, Voit will be undergoing surgery on his torn meniscus in his knee, and will miss at least April and May. This puts the spotlight on Bruce to reclaim his Glory Days, when every speedball wasn’t thrown right by him. Whereas, Tauchman is interesting in AL-Only leagues, if he can get in the lineup. I’ve added neither to my 2021 fantasy baseball rankings, because they might only be platooning for six to eight weeks. In the top 20 1st basemen, I lowered Luke Voit, taking roughly 200 ABs off his projections. Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for 2021 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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‘Member the days when I told you that you needed a top 1st basemen and you shouldn’t look for sleepers at this position? Don’t remember? Prolly for best, leave more room in your brain to remember an excuse for why you didn’t exercise. Previously, I’d tell you to go to my top 20 1st basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball (not clickbait at all) and draft some top guys and stop fooling around with sleepers at this position. Of course, I’m malleable like Gumby and this year we need to look for sleepers at 1st base *ducks head*.  Whoa, someone threw a wrench into this! Fine, Pete Alonso and Matt Olson get my nethers ablaze, but 1st basemen dry up quick. As with other positions like the catchers to target (again, not clickbait), these are 1st basemen that are being drafted late. For the 1st basemen, I’m going with an ADP of 150 or later to be included in this post. Anyway, here’s some 1st basemen to target for 2021 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Howdy, folks.

Feels weird to say Spring Training is right around the corner when my neck of the woods has upwards of 20-something inches of snow on the way tomorrow night-ish. But, Spring Training is right around the corner! And it’s a good thing, too, cuz these weekly offseason updates are getting less exciting from here on out since all the sexy names have finally gone somewhere. There are some good players yet to be signed, but no one I’m on the edge of my seat over. Does anyone really expect Justin Turner not to be a Dodger at this point?

This past week was a bunch of meh faces in new places for the most part, except my boy Benny Baseball is closer to home now after a three-team trade I’ll be jumping into straight away:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

First Base is back baby! It’s good again!!!! Shout it from the mountains!!! Read this in one of those culturally appropriated Robin Williams voices. After a few lean years the first base position has some sizzle. Or perhaps this is the hangover of the catcher episode. “Catchers: The Ugly Friend/Slump-Buster of Fantasy Baseball”. Anyway, Grey, yours trues, and crews (there is no crew) chew through the top bats at first base. A serious run through 50+ names you need to know for 2021 Fantasy Baseball.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The top 20 1st basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball are fascinating, at least according to early ADP. There’s some top guys to draft, a few, at least. But, unlike past years, there’s also quite a few 1st basemen to draft after the top 100. Usually I’d scream at you in the most shrill of voices that if you didn’t have a top five 1st baseman you were going to lose your league. I’m not against drafting one of those top guys, but there’s also quite a few later 1st basemen that I could see getting hip wit’. It’s wit’ because it’s hip, get it? Here’s Steamer’s 2021 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2021 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers.  All projections included here are mine, and where I see tiers starting and stopping are included. Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Reds trading away their closer, Raisel Iglesias, for Noé Ramirez is the kind of deal that will be used by future generations when they dissect when baseball clearly wasn’t about winning. This makes sense from the Angels’ perspective, clearly. Nothing that Angels like more than las Iglesias, and now they have two of them, having traded for Jose Iglesias earlier this offseason. This is not a black and white world, so I could see them trading for Emilio Pagan to balance their shoulders. Mike Trout will need to learn the Spanish nursery rhyme, “Aquí is the Iglesias, aqui is the personas, aquí is the pescado without a championship.” All I Noé is that dude is an 88-MPH middle reliever and what are the Reds doing? I like Amir Mrs. Garrett as much as the next guy, but he’s their closer now? I thought they were trying to be competitive. Why is “not being competitive” even an option? Okay, I’m about to burst my ulcer. So, Raisel Iglesias will clearly be the Angels’ closer, and has the stuff to be a top 3 closer. Last year he went 12.1 K/9, 2 BB/9, and 2.87 xFIP, and is nearly that dominant in his career, not just goofy 60-game seasons. For 2021, I’ll give Raisel Iglesias projections of 2-3/2.52/1.06/84, 34 saves in 67 IP.

On a more somber note, wonder what the Heaven’s Gate guy would’ve thought about the Angels trading for Raisel Iglesias and Jose Iglesias. That’s gotta be a sign, right? No? Well, he would’ve thought it was. Side note:  the phrase “what in the holy eff” was invented for the HBO Max Heaven’s Gate documentary. As for Jose Iglesias, I’ve already drafted him in one 2021 league. Yes, I’ve already drafted a 2021 fantasy baseball league, I’ll try to go over it later this week. It was super late when I went to Iglesias, but I was hoping he could save my batting average’s soul. He’s a high contact, nothing else guy. For 2021, I’ll give Jose Iglesias projections of 64/8/68/.283/6 in 472 ABs. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2021 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?