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The Detroit Tigers have finally given the Riley Greene Light calling up their highly touted prospect to make his first MLB start Saturday and it could not come soon enough. Detroit ranks dead last in OBP, SLG and OPS. They are also last in steals, runs, RBIs and you guessed it–home runs with just 31, more than 70 less than the Yankees have hit. We’re talking WOAT status for the Tigers o-fence, people. So I am happy to write that help may be on the way in the form of outfielder Riley Greene. RG was all-the-buzz in March, scheduled to start the season in the bigs after a hot spring (.429, 2 home runs in 11 games), but a broken foot sidelined him and the hype, setting his debut back months. Well, I’m here to hype him up again, why do you think I’m wearing this giant clock around my neck? Grey told you to BUY Riley weeks ago proposing the Tigers get a Riley Greene New Deal to help the Detroit baseball climate change. Grey said, “Riley Greene wears his underwear like a glove because he’s got five tools.” That means he does it all, folks! And probably wears box briefs. He could give you 10 home runs, 15 steals going forward. He could also hit .230. Or maybe .280? We don’t know! His K% in 2021 suggests the former but he’s been solid since returning to action at the end of May slashing .279/.347/.729 with a home run, 10 runs scored and 4 SB. Did I mention he’s only 21? That means cougar moms can date him without feeling guilty. Also, his concerning K% has so far improved from last year but sample sizes be small. I’d still take that any day of the week over Javier Baez’s 0-for-4 with 3 Ks striking out to Frank Schwindel’s eephus pitch. Itch ranked him as a top five prospect in baseball. The ‘Roit honestly can’t do any worse offensively than they have and you could do a lot worse than a flier on Riley Greene! I’m keen on Greene and I’d grab him everywhere I needed a fantasy baseball player. This kid’s gonna be a star! Ha-cha-cha!

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball on Friday night:

Keegan Thompson – 6.0 IP, 2 hits, 0 ER, 2 BB, 9 K. His best start in…I don’t know, ever? Probably ever. Keegan becomes the unlikely hero to end the Braves win streak at 14 and the Cubs loss streak at 10 with his stellar performance. Seems like dude had everything going against him, too! A road start against the hottest team in the NL along with a pitcher’s duel versus Charlie Morton who was absolutely dealing (7.0 IP, 3 hits, 0 ER, 9 K) versus Keeg’s sad sack Cubs offense. Still, Keegan did have one thing going for him–he was facing me in a head to head fantasy match up, and when that’s happening anything is possible, KG. Unfortunately, he won’t be playing me next week but he does get a nice juicy start versus Pittsburgh. I’d tread carefully but if you had the Italian beef to start Thompson yesterday versus Atlanta you earned this outing.

Tarik Skubal – 5.0 IP, 8 hits, 5 ER, 2 BB, 4 K. Technically, he’s Detroit’s Ace with Eduardo Rodriguez being excused to go home while they’re losing. Riley Greene can’t do everything, but hopefully he can do something. As for Skubal, he gets a scary Red Sox matchup next week and sometimes you need to lose yourself in Detroit before you can really get your chance to blow. Just ask B.Rabbit.

Jonah Heim – 2-for-4, HR (8), 3 RBI. Heim liched this one!

Jon Gray – 7.0 IP, 5 hits, 0 ER, 6 K, 2nd win. After posting a 5.04 ERA in May, Jonny’s got a 2.52 ERA in June with a 31/9 K/BB. These are the 50 shades of Gray. He gets the Nats next week. Yeah, I’m starting him!

Ranger Suarez – 5.2 IP, 6 hits, 3 ER, 3 BB, 5 K, 5th win. Why do I always think he plays for Texas? Hmm. I wonder why? This start did nothing to curb that confusion.

Brad Hand – 1.0 IP, BB, K, SV (2). Seranthony Dominguez pitched to the heart of the order in the eighth and struck out two so it looks like that’s who Manager not-Joe Girardi trusts more, but both of these jokers will probably get save chances. Grey told you to BUY Seranthony first but I wouldn’t blame you for holding Hands. It’s actually kind of adorable.

Joan Adon – 5.0 IP, 7 hits, 4 ER, BB, 6 K, 1-11, ERA at 6.97. ELEVEN LOSSES! ELEVEN! Yeah, it’s kind of like that MBB!

Josh Bell –  3-for-6, 4 runs, 3 HR (9, 10, 11), 5 RBI. Three ding dong dingers from the Bell! One shot in the day game and two in the evening–it’s like night and day with this guy! That’s four in two days and he’s tanked five in the past week alone! He’s the only Nat-onal within even 30 points of .300 slashing .299/.380/.485. Did he sap all his power from Soto or did he just really want to get Joan win number. two? Regardless, he should look real good in Dodger blue come the trading deadline.

Bryce Harper – 4-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBI. After getting three hits in the first game he hit a pinch-hit double in the night cap to tie it. The Phillies won both game and it’d be hard for you to convince me Bryce Harper wasn’t at least partially responsible for that.

Juan Soto – 0-for-8 hitting .216. Take notes from Harper! This is how superstars carry their team’s, kid! We all know you can do it! Try harder.

Adley Rutschman – 2-for-3,  RBI. Don’t look now but the O’s just took a series from the Blue Jays and they aren’t completely terrible. I said don’t look!

Cedric Mullins – 1-for-4, 2 SB (15). Aww, you looked didn’t you? Now you know that they are in fact, still kind of terrible.

Jorge Lopez – 1.1 IP, 1 hit, 0 ER, 4 K, SV (10). Except for this guy, he’s very, very good. The 0.82 ERA and 0.85 WHIP along with the 34/13 K/BB are nicer than a Klay Thompson victory speech and he’s actually been more valuable than Edwin Diaz, Emmanuel Clase, Jordan Romano…should I keep going? The difference is Lopez is still available in almost 60% of leagues. Baffling, ya’ll! Consider me baffled.

Shane Baz – 6.0 IP, 2 hits, 0 ER, 7 K. Baz Luhrmann got a new Elvis movie coming out and like Elvis Shane’s got all the moves the girls swoon over. He had the O’s hitters All Shook Up, and to be honest I Can’t Help Falling In Love With Him. If he’s somehow out there in your league, that is a literal Ace sitting on your waiver wire. Grab him! It’s Now or Never!

Vidal Brujan – 2-for-4 as he led off slashing .158/.202/.228. Was caught stealing for the fifth time Friday night. He’s slightly more interesting to me leading off but that unfortunately doesn’t make him any better at hitting baseballs or stealing bases at the big league level.

Eric Lauer – 6.1 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER, BB, 5 K, 3 HR, 6th win versus Hunter Greene – 5.0 IP, 4 hits, 4 ER, 2 BB, 6 K. The Regression fairies know you bought that Celtics Jayson Tatum Celtics jersey just days before game four. They hate band wagon jumpers and they will destroy your ratios!

Hunter Renfroe – 1-for-4, HR (11), 3 RBI. Willy Adames (12) and Keston Hiura (6) also homered. Hey, speaking of Hunters, Greene leads the league in home runs allowed with 2.4 per game. If that seems high to you, that’s because it is. He’s allowed 17 so far in 2022, and you’d think streaming bats against him might be the play. The good news for Greene is Friday night’s were the first two he’s given up in June. We call that progress! Dare me to start Greene vs the Dodgers next week. Go ahead, dare me! I will man, I’m crazy!

Tommy Pham – 1-for-4, HR (9). Tommy Pham cares about Tommy Pham. He told us. He’s about getting those stats and getting that paycheck and taking care of Tommy Pham. That doesn’t make for a great teammate, but it sounds like a pretty good fantasy player.

Michael Wacha – 5.1 IP, 6 hits, ER, BB, 5 K, 5th win, ERA at 2.28. Did you know this was his first career start versus the Cards? I have fond memories of streaming Wacha many years ago when he was a Cardinal, so this was a bit of a “Revenge” game for both of us.

John Schreiber – 1.1 IP, BB, K. BUY. Outside of the ninth inning, the Sawx bullpen actually looked good in this one, for once. Schreiber may be far from save opps at the moment, but he hasn’t given up a run since late May and his ratios are elite (0.92 ERA, 0.66 WHIP). That can help your fantasy team!

Tanner Houck – 0.1 IP, 2 hits, ER, K, SV (3). What the Houck. This save was a lot shakier than the line looks, which looks plenty shakey. Austin Davis got the first two outs of the ninth before getting into trouble and Tanner came in to clean things up but gave up back-to-back doubles before striking out Paul Goldschmidt to end the game. I still think Houck gets the next save chance, but I no longer feel good about it.

Jarren Duran  – 1-for-2, run, 2nd triple. BUY. He’s gone 7-for-22 in his limited time in 2022, and alreayd has two triples!? *Swoons* I’m a real Duran Stan NGL NGSLY (never gonna stop lovin’ you), and I am fully a realist who knows that he’s probably just up for a few more days until Kiké Hernandez is fully healthy. But MAYBE just maybe if he’s good (which he has been) and he flashes that game changing speed at the top of the Red Sox order (which he has done) Cora will keep him around? An on base guy with speed like Jarren’s batting in front of Xander and Devers? Mmm. That photo of him in my wallet is a lot less weird now isn’t it? No? Oh well, either way that’s why he’s an add everywhere for me.

Rafael Devers – 2-for-3, RBI. The home runs are cake. They are my raison d’etre. But it’s when Raffy steals a base I wanna stop the wedding reception and make an announcement to everyone, “I’m so happy for the bride and groom but even happier I own Rafael Devers! And I’m okay with the fact that he’s not Aaron Judge! I’m okay with it!”

Pablo Lopez – 5.1 IP, 8 hits, 6 ER, BB, 5 K. Wrong place, wrong time. Mets weren’t about to take an L with Francisco Lindor’s moms in attendance. He gets a juicy rebound start versus Colorado next week though!

Pete Alonso – 2-for-4, Grand Slam HR (19). Albombso! He’s got 63 RBIs now. That’s more than the Tigers 3-4-and-5 hitters combined. I’m really punching down on the Tigers today.

Francisco Lindor – 1-for-3, HR (10), 4 RBI. Lindo with that Proud Mom energy!

Carlos Carrasco – 6.1 IP, 8 hits, 3 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, 8th win. Wait–you’re telling me the Mets are going to add Jacob deGrom and Max Scherzer to their rotation in the second half and I’m supposed to feel bad they lost Tylor Megill? Nope.

Jon Berti – 1-for-5, SB (15). He was a BUY and he stole a base. That’s why we told you to buy him!

Jordan Montgomery – 6.0 IP, 3 hits, 2 ER, BB, 5 K, 3rd win. I am shocked and awed this is only his third win on a 48 win team. I’m not sure how he even pulled that off with those ratios (2.72 ERA, 0.95 WHIP). I’m not even mad, I’m actually impressed, Baxter.

Kyle Higashioka – 0-for-5, RBI. Honestly, Nevermind, Drake, it’s just easier to list the Yankees who don’t get hits. It saves both time and space, but if you insists *takes deep breathe* Giancarlo Stanton hit his 15th home run, DJ LeMahieu hit number six, Joey Gallo mashed his ninth, and Anthony Rizzo hit his 17th, a grand salami, ayy fuggedaboutit I’m driving here! The Yankees are now 32 games above .500 and this feels like some kind of waking nightmare? Why is this happening to me? It’s like a messed up episode of Black Mirror you just can’t shake.

Gabriel Moreno – 3-for-4, 4 RBI. He was a BUY! Well, at least both their catchers are hitting!

Alejandro Kirk – 1-for-3, 2 runs, HR (6). Yeah, the BJays are still good. The Yankees are just much, much better. Speaking of Drake and Toronto, there’s a new Drizzy album (!), oh for real has it been 3 months already? I swear Drake can write a certified banger song of the summer (CBSOTS) in like four minutes. And the song will be like six minutes. Is it me or do the hyped Drake albums always turn out bad and the surprise drops are always fire loaded with hit songs. I mean none of it’s really “bad.” It’s Drake music. It’s all just “fine.”

Carlos Rodon – 8.0 IP, 2 hits, 0 ER, 2 BB, 8 K, 6th win, ERA at 2.84 ERA. Yes, Carlos, this is what you’re supposed to do against the Pirates. Absolutely dominate. Thank you for doing your job. I mean that for real, I’m sorry if it sounded sarcastic.

Joc Pederson – 1-for-4, HR (14). That home run was for all the true fantasy warriors out there who have held healthy players on their injured list for weeks without making any moves just so they wouldn’t have to drop anyone.

Luis Gonzalez – 1-for-3, HR (3) as he led off. Hitting .263 in the past week with a homer and a steal. Another week another Giant I know you’re not going to add no matter what I tell you he does.

Lucas Giolito – 5.0 IP, 7 hits, 8 ER, 3 BB, 3 K. His worst outing since April 2018. At one point in the sixth he allows five straight Astros to get on base, that’s when La Russa finally pulled him. Could chalk this one up to meeting the Astros at the wrong time (they hit five home runs) but things won’t get any easier for him next week versus Toronto. I blame Girardi! I mean La Russa. But for real, how bad does this have to get? Do they sink to the Cubs level to make a change? Why are they so bad?

Yordan Alvarez – 2-for-4, HR (18), 2 RBI. Michael Brantley also hit a Grand Slam HR (5), and Kyle Tucker (13) and Alex Bregman (7) also homered. I guess the Astros are hot again. Serious question, really, look how serious my face is: would you rather own all the Astros or all the Yankees in fantasy? Easy answer?

Yuli Gurriel – 3-for-3 HR (5). Yes, it’s an easy answer, but you definitely second-guessed yourself for a second didn’t you! And in dynasty leagues all bets are off.

Framber Valdez – 6.0 IP, 8 hits, 3 ER, 7 K, 7th win. OK, he doesn’t have the strikeouts that Verlander has or the pedigree or the bombshell wife (no disrespect to the beautiful Mrs. Valdez), but Framber is about as solid as they come. He always pitches at least six innings, he never allows more than three runs, and the 68/28 K/BB is more than serviceable. He’s also won six of his last seven starts. Pitchers like Framby win fantasy leagues.

AJ Pollock – 1-for-4, HR (4), 3 RBI as he led off. Don’t let the paint splotches fool you, AJ has an eight game hitting streak with 7 runs and 7 multi-hit games in that stretch! Tim Anderson should be back Monday and resume leading off killing Pollock’s value a bit, but for now have at it, hoss!

C.J. Cron – 3-for-5, 2 HR (16), 5 RBI. Cron Air! Both dongs were off Gore, one of those he slapped 484 feet! Yum, that one’s well over the hot dog stand, sweet sassy molassy! That is how you Coors, boys and girls!

Kyle Freeland – 7.0 IP, 8 hits, 4 ER, BB, 0 Ks. This was actually Kyle’s first career start without recording a strikeout. So that’s…something! *Preheats oven to 350 degrees, waits 5-6 minutes for it to be the perfect temperature, waits 1-2 more minutes (darn electric!), sticks head in oven.*

MacKenzie Gore – 4.0 IP, 9 hits, 8 ER, 3 BB, K, 3 HR. 14 ER in his past two starts both versus Colorado. The Regression fairies spent some time in San Diego but insist the Mexican food is better in Denver. Their tacos will murder your palette and destroy your ratios!

Mike Clevinger – 2.0 IP, 5 hits, 2 ER, 2 K. Aren’t you glad you drafted him. Hey, that oven is still fully preheated if you need it. Plenty of room in here! Nice and toasty!

Trent Grisham – 1-for-4, HR (5). This one was also a shot. 450+ feet, he tanked it. As for that tweet though, you cannot be serious about voting for this guy to the All Star team @Padres. I can think about 10 guys more deserving without a single google. That doesn’t mean I don’t like him for fantasy, 2 dongs, 5 runs and a steal in the past week! Wish he batted higher in the lineup but def worth a look in Coors this weekend.

Robbie Ray – 7.0 IP, 3 hits, ER, BB, 10K, 6th win. Mhmm. Ahh yes, that’s more like it. RobRay looked like his Cy Young self Friday night taking a no-hitter into the 7th inning. He wears those tight pants to show off his assets ie 17 whiffs for 10 Ks. He gets the lowly BrOakland A’ss next week. Yes, please, more like this!

Justin Upton – 0-for-2, K as he started in left field but left in the after taking one to the head. Scary moment but J Upside appears to be okay and may even play again this weekend. The pitcher Michael Lorenzen (5.0 IP, 7 ER, 3 BB, 3 K) fully blamed the balls and trashed MLB saying the balls are all slick, it’s a big conspiracy and “ridiculous.” I guess that explains his 7 ER, too?

Julio Rodriguez – 3-for-4, run, RBI. Juul-Rod straight vaping! Can I tangent real quick? After seeing Upton get beamed I remembered the brief three day period of joy where I was excited Kyle Lewis was back this year. Remember Kyle Lewis? After a long journey to return from injuries, he was back four games, hit two absolute bombs, then hit the concussion IL and it’s like no one has heard from him since. Is he in the Upside Down? Did he join that FLDS Mormon sex cult on Netflix? Wtf happened? I hope he’s okay.

Daniel Lynch – 5.0 IP, 4 hits, ER, 2 BB, 10 K, 3rd win, ERA at 5.19. Dan the man generated 23 swinging strikes! That’s good! But he’s still given up 11 runs in the past two weeks. That’s bad. The 60/25 K/BB is tempting, sure, I’m desperate, but I ain’t that desperate.

Lou Trivino – 1.0 IP, BB, 2 K. Only interesting note that came out of this Oakland/KC game was how okay Trivino pitched in the ninth down by 4 runs. There’s low pressure situations, then there’s Oakland A’s games in the ninth. There couldn’t have been 1000 fans left, even the other players have already left the dugout to beat traffic.

Jordan Luplow – 2-for-4, 2 HR (9), 3 RBI slashing .183/.287/.495. He’s also got 4 steals! How Luplow can you go? I’d say grabbing Jordan is pretty low!

Zach Plesac – 6.0 IP, 5 hits, ER, 2 BB, K. Yeah! But also nah.

Byron Buxton – 2-for-5, HR (19) slashing .231/.311/.586. Sir Byron doesn’t care about your batting average. He’s found the only thing he can do consistently without injuring himself: mashing dingers. Me? I’m all about it, BB!

Clayton Kershaw – 5.0 IP, 5 hits, ER, BB, 4 K. The Dodgers just do not score for Kersh. Does he have Tyler Anderson envy yet?

Trea Turner – 3-for-5 as he led off. Trying to curb my enthusiasm for Trea leading off and the stolen base potential but he looked pretttay, pretttaaay good. I know Mookie likes leading off, and he’s Mookie so you do what he wants but it honestly makes no sense. Depending on how many games Mook plays, let’s say 140 games started, that’s at the very least 140 times Mookie Betts, a top three outfielder in the MLB, is getting up without men on base. Make the switch, Roberts! My team needs steals!

Cody Bellinger – 2-for-4, HR (8), SB (8). Cody B! In Los Angeles, the slam & legs is served in a $17 wellness shake filled with roots and seeds and other things you can find in a handful of dirt. It’s loaded with superfoods and they tell you you won’t even taste the kale but you can definitely taste the kale.

Thanks for reading! Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!