Don’t worry, it’s still me, the same guy who has toiled at the kitchen table over an iPad covering the corner infield positions.
I’m just trying to freshen up a bit. Kelder is boring. The Educator, as a real-life teacher, he’s a stallion. Wavy non-gray hair, no extra 20 pounds being carried around, and a normal-sized nose instead of a Gonzo-shaped honker.
And if you think about it, which I don’t know why you would, school has an unlimited amount of source material. Like 6-7 articles worth, right? Catch that? Let me know if I’m golden or pathetic in the comments because, after all, I teach middle school. It’s all either great or the worst thing ever there!
Most teachers have been gifted with eyes in the back of their heads. Not me, all I have is a gray patch, like one blob of gray hair back there, no eyes. The Educator has been imbued with future vision, however.
We still have 40% of the season left, and we all know fantasy football prep is what most players will pivot to. Keep pounding (extra credit if you know that reference in the comments) and heed these predictions. At the end of the season, you can walk across the virtual stage as a champion.
So to complete the rebrand, or reboot, or removal from Razzball if you all complain as you probably should, here are some second half predictions, in school related form.
2nd Half Valedictorians
1B: Cody Bellinger: Cody has been consistent and has good grades due to effort and health, finally. He has an outside shot at a 20-20 season (17 HR, 9 SB) and hits in the general area of Aaron Judge. Give me a guy in the top 15 percentile in K and whiff rate and a 79 percentile in squared up. Consistency like Bellinger is valuable, and his OPS since settling into the lineup was .902 in May, .854 in June, and .948 so far this month.
If you can deal Vladimir Guerrero Jr. for him, you shouldn’t. But guys like Josh Naylor, people rated ahead of him, you should explore these deals. Even high flyers like Michael Busch will be lower than Belly for the rest of the season. Go to lunch and feast on the Big Belly Deli.
3B: I’m not saying he’s a star, but Junior Caminero at age 21 is what they look like. Fresh off an All-Star start, Junior will use his league-best bat speed to continue to develop and carry the fun-to-watch Rays.
Side note: I’ve missed out on three great prospects in my one minor league trip each summer. One year, I was in the stands in Myrtle Beach in a Pete Crow-Armstrong day off. The next, same place, Cade Horton debut was rained out. And the next, in Durham, Junior Caminero was scratched.
Caminero is the most talented third baseman in baseball. Rafael Devers is in a difficult park, and you’ve read all you need on Jose Ramirez and Manny Machado. I’d consider Caminero as the high upside guy if you need a boost. There’s truly no limit to what his ceiling is.
Sorry, forgot to cite my sources and research. People who swing harder than literally the rest of the entire league will hit home runs. Junior has 25; I think he can get 40. The average in this new era won’t hurt, and the team is in the playoff chase. If my ranks were to be posted (hey, great idea!), he’d be my second, and that’s only because I’m a chicken. He’s a new superstar.
Nurse’s Office
Austin Riley, in a cliffhanger before the break, had an abdominal issue. I’m so proud of him! He’s supposed to come back this week. Good for him! Fast healing leads to success. We can all hope Isaac Paredes recovers from his hamstring injury as quickly. He’s going for imaging soon, and everyone knows how tricky hamstrings are. Guessing he’s out for a month at least. So one good news and one not so much!
Alex Bregman is back as well, played two of three this weekend. Ready to roll, is he. Max Muncy had to use those new glasses to read a report on his knee; out for a couple of weeks.
Stickers on the Assignments
Bryce Harper has three home runs since the wrist issue he missed time with, so maybe, just maybe, he can prove me right? Please? Have a big second half, right Bryce? He hasn’t yet had a nuclear month like he usually does, and no time like the present.
Nick Kurtz is on a tear in July, slashing .346/.433/.885 (way to go on that slug, Nick!), so hear me out. I’m selling him in a redraft. The strikeout rate is still over 30 even during this torrid stretch. This will not last unless he adjusts. Find someone who believes. I know, Educators should always believe, but that’s crap. Educators need to pick and choose their optimism.
Any form of keeper or dynasty, of course, be very very excited. I have him in two dynasties and two keepers of my own, and he’s untouchable. I’ll trade him in my redraft and keep you posted on the Google Classroom board.
Not Mad, I’m Just Frustrated
It’s not really his fault; it’s yours. Did you really think Pete Alonso would be a high average guy with power? He’s reverted to the below-average contact rate, and while the power should help the old counting stats, he’s probably not going to be the top-rated guy at the position like our Player Rater suggests.
So, that’s it. Please do let me know what you think; after all, I am your humble servant. And like any good educator, I’ll tell you what you did wrong and fix it!
Wait, the bell doesn’t dismiss you, I do.
Class dismissed
