Because Casey Kotchman is most noteworthy (in my eyes) for having the longest known case of mononucleosis, it makes sense he’d be considered a sleeper. Only, not necessarily, a fantasy baseball sleeper. More like a Prince Valium one. After the trade to the Braves last year, Casey Kotchman hit 2/20/.237. “Write him off as a once interesting prospect that never reached his potential,” says some random crotchety old baseball scout. I hear ya, random old baseball crotchety scout, but I find something making me keep come back to him. Sorta like my man-wood for Alex J.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Monthly Archives: March 2009
Remember the blonde chick from the The Real World: Hawaii, who, like, totally fell for Colin? She was the cute girl with the young grandmother body. You know who I’m talking about? Cool. Yeah, she’s not Kendry Morales. Kendry Morales is the doode that the Angels are putting in as their starting 1st baseman. Joly Hesus! A prospect that is going to be playing 1st for an AL team that scores runs like an NL team! How did you miss that, right? Pretty easily. He’s sizz-ucked in his limited time in the majors. In 127 games in the Majors, he’s sitting on a career line of 12/45/.249 with no speed. If you were a Benihana chef, you’d cut the tail of those numbers and flip ‘em into your hat. So what is it that I like about Kendry Morales that makes him a 2009 fantasy sleeper?
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Usually I wait until the 1st of every month to go over who’s closing where and who’s backing them up. You know, the Donkey-Corn/Brain Freeze/$12 Salad post. See, you are familiar with my work. Great, I love how you do whatever you do too. Being in the heart of fantasy baseball draft season, my diploma from The College of Fantasy Baseball at Charleston says I must do some early closer updates for 2009 fantasy baseball. I’m not going to mention guys who are completely safe as of right now. One generalization before I get to these closer schmohawks. You want anyone getting saves. Yes, you do. Trust me. You may think Lindstrom will return in 2 weeks and be fine getting 25 saves this year. You may be right. But if Leo Nunez starts the season as the closer, there’s just as good a chance that he keeps the job all year. Last year, you swore Chad Cordero would get the job back from Rauch and there was no reason to grab Big Jon. You swore Huston Street would take back the job from Ziegler. You also missed out on good closers. Anyway, here’s some closers to watch for 2009 fantasy baseball:
Matt Lindstrom – Strained rotator cuff. I would still put him on my bench because he could bounce right back. Or not…
Leo Nunez – Could easily end up with 35 saves or 5. There’s the fun!
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If you’re havin’ pitching problems I feel bad for you, son… I got 99 problems but pitching ain’t one…. Check the baseline out, uh-huh… Bounce wit it to my bro Ryan’s glove, uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh, yeah… Can’t leave the hitters alone, the Nats need me… There’s a new Jay-Z in town and his name is Jordan Zimmermann.
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You know what burns me up? Fire? Yes, random italicized voice, but something else too. Three weeks ago, ESPN threw out trash like this, “Hamels could be one of the top-5 starters in most leagues now that questions about his durability and moxie have passed.
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If I may jump into the cavern of your noggin for a moment, you’re probably thinking, “Lastings Milledge — isn’t he that failed prospect the Mets gave up on?” Slow your roll there. He’s only 23 years old. Or maybe you’re thinking, “I could’ve sworn I remember seeing Milledge on my league’s waivers last year.” You’re right; Milledge clogged up outfields last year with non-digestible tools causing many to drop him. Through the end of July last year, Milledge was at 7 home runs, 13 steals and a .237 average. re: those numbers, They’re awful! Don’t go back and look again. You’ll go blind like the Blind Art Garfunkel on American Idol. Yet, through all of this, I still think Milledge is a 2009 fantasy sleeper. Hear’s Y as an illiterate wood right.
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Then one day Jed was hopin’ he could start; and Lugo and Scrappy Doo started fallin’ apart. This is an opening for good ol’ Jed. The kind to keep those taking late MI fliers fed. Said Yawkey is the place you ought to be. So he packed up his Wii to play with Papi. Ortiz, that is. Jed Lowrie is in, Julio Lugo is out and Nomar Garciaparra is so five minutes ago. Yo, whaddup, double play pardner? Not your knee, I assume. And the Jed Lowrie fantasy sleeper post is back on like Donkey Kong. Sure, the Sox are saying Julio Lugo may only be out a month, but he was ‘healthy’ last year and he lost playing time. Do the math! Anyway, here’s some more things I saw in spring training that pertains to fantasy baseball:
Dustin Pedroia – Man, I’m telling you right now (unless you’re reading this sometime in the future. Damn you, Future Boy!) if Dustin Pedroia sheets the bed this year, I’m going to milk that carton at least once a week and twice on Moosday. During the WBC (World Backups Championship?), Pedroia came up lame due to a strained muscle near his rib cage. For those of us playing fantasy baseball that have never seen a “hitter” “hit,” strained muscles near the rib cage can cause pain when a batter swings. If Pedroia is fine fine, he bounces back with no ill effects and still hits his 15 to 18 home runs. Now what if Pedroia is not that fine fine? Say he only hits 12 to 15 home runs. Do you see what a waste of an early pick Pedroia could be? You really want a 2nd round pick that might hit 12 home runs and steals 15? Who are you, Kelly Johnson? That’s giving me The Gas Face just thinking about it.
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We at Razzball realize that exporting our views across the country has damaging consequences on the blogosphere. To help make amends, we are reaching out to leading team blogs and featuring their locally blogged answers to pressing 2009 fantasy baseball questions regarding their team.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
We at Razzball realize that exporting our views across the country has damaging consequences on the blogosphere. To help make amends, we are reaching out to leading team blogs and featuring their locally blogged answers to pressing 2009 fantasy baseball questions regarding their team.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
