Doesn’t Danny Valencia sound like a bad actor’s stage name?  “For my audition, I’m going to do the scene ‘Eating the Old 96er’ from The Great Outdoors.”  Okay, try not to choke.  (Quick side note:  My aunt used to date Danny Aiello.  But not Danny Aiello, the actor.  A different Danny Aiello.  It was like McDowell’s vs. McDonald’s.  “They got the Golden Arches, mine is the Golden Arcs.”  I’d tell people, “Yeah, I was at dinner with Danny Aiello.”  My friends would be, “Danny Aiello?!”  “Yeah, Danny Aiello!”  Then my friends would make excuses to come over and be like, “That’s not Danny Aiello!”  And I’d be like, “That’s Danny Aiello!”  Then one day we were at a restaurant and who walks in but the real Danny Aiello.  It was like when Lorraine attempts to escape the house, but encounters her 2015 counterpart and faints.)  So Valencia is hitting over .400 at home, where the Twins are the final week.  Yes, over .400.  He also has 3 homers in the last week.  Here’s hoping he can make the magic last for more than one night or week.  Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:


Melvin Mora – This schmohawk is usually Melvin Van Feebles, but he’s hitting well in the last week and there’s no guarantee Mini-Mini Donkey will be inserted right back into the lineup.

Mike Aviles – It must be the end of the season when I’m heavily promoting a guy who’s barely above Crapolanco’s production.

Chris Johnson – As they say at bachelorette parties, this Johnson’s hot.

Wilson Betemit – Geez, how many corner infidels can be hot in the final week?  I’ll answer that right after I dump Sandoval and his Shirley Hemphill-lookalike body.

Chris Carter – This isn’t a buy for this year, but, if you’re in a keeper, I’d take a flier on Carter just to see how things play out this winter.

Danny Espinosa – Blah blah blah Espinosa!  Blah blah blah Buy!  Blah blah blah Dracula!

Randy Wolf – He appeared in the borderline starters post for last week.  Before that, he went out with your Moms and did her wrong.  So I don’t fully trust him, but he’s been lights out.

Edwin Jackson – Really only listed here because he gets 2 starts in the final week and the final one is vs. the Indians and their $24 of trinkets.

Carlos Zambrano – Has been great since returning to the rotation and also gets 2 starts in the final week.  Last start is vs. the Astros.  Hello, sexy, what’s your name?

Nick Blackburn – Just went over my Nick Blackburn fantasy.  It’s a fascinating read, I count only three typos.  Or is that, tipe-ohs?  Anyhoo!  Blackburn’s set for two starts next week, but I imagine the 2nd start will be shortened or skipped since the ‘offs.

Tim Stauffer – This is Grey, the Not-Really-Greek’s Double Yahtzee pick of the week!  Two starts, one at home, one in San Fran.

Alex Sanabia – I actually picked him up in one league for his two starts, but I’m not excited about it.  How’s that for selling a Buy?!

Carlos Carrasco – And last of the two start pitchers for next week that have a legit chance of appearing on any of my teams.  And, yes, Carrasco sounds like a luchador.

David Murphy – If you haven’t picked up Murphy yet, you’re probably not paying attention anyway.  It’s a shame, you could’ve been a contender.

Michael Morse – Something tells me he won’t be hot by next Tuesday, but there’s only, like, ten more days of season left, so what the eff in the coolie hole.

Will Venable – I think I’ve mentioned this before, but Venable is the 2nd fastest guy in the majors after Crawford, according to Bill James’ Speed Score.  Tied with Brett Gardner and ahead of Michael Bourn, Reyes, Stubbs, Victorino…  Don’t just stare, say something!  Okay, maybe I’m the only one that finds that interesting.

Jarrod Dyson – He’s fast.  That’s all I got.  I’m not sure he’ll play and he’ll never hit for power.  He’s like a non-French Juan Pierre.

Clay Hensley – SAGNOF!

Chris Sale – See Hensley, Clay.  Or 1/8th of an inch above.

Craig Breslow – Michael Wuertz’ thumb is huertz and Ziegler throws like a girl.

Phil Coke – In a blind taste test, 4 out of 5 SAGNOF’ers choose Ryan Pepsi, but Coke is it.

Juan Gutierrez – I like Kirk Gibson.  He was a fist pumping fool before Vinny.  Though I think making Gutierrez the closer was reason enough for him to never manage another game, let alone get signed on for next year, but mine is not to reason why.


Ted Lilly – I’m actually a fan of Lilly, but he has two starts left and his next start is in Coors.  Blech.

Andrew Bailey – See Jose Valverde.

Jose Valverde – See Andrew Bailey.

Joe Mauer – Unless your league counts the playoffs, you need someone else.

Zack Greinke – Kinda depends on your shituation but I dropped Greinke in the one league I have him for a two start pitcher.  And it felt great!  Sayonora, schmohawk!

Any Pitcher That Has Pitched His Last Start – Maximize your lineup spots with middle relievers for vulture wins or other starters.  It’s that time, friends.  Good luck!

  1. Critter Nagurski says:

    Goodness, that Danny Aiello story slayed me, thank you.

    “That’s Danny Aiello!” hahahaha

    Safe to drop Minor (FLA hits LHP pretty well and Philly might eat him alive)?

  2. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Critter Nagurski: Thanks! I wouldn’t start Minor anymore unless it was dire.

  3. royce! says:

    Not sure if this was the penultimate or last Friday Buy/Sell post, but it was definitely the ultimate either way. Real funny shizz all the way through (my personal favorite was the Espinosa writeup- how did I not see that coming?), and, having not listened to the Decemberists for a while, I played the song while reading the post.

    You should always suggest theme songs to accompany posts (not that you did this time, but it was implied, right?). One of the early issues of McSweeneys came with a soundtrack (by They Might Be Giants) to listen to while reading the articles and looking at the art. Probably their best issue.

  4. bsa says:

    now why did you have to list Mora? I picked him up earlier than this posting. I only look smart and not wicked smaht.
    If Bob can ride into first with his over the hill gang why not Mora in the last week?!
    Lets see how we roll as Steve a big push last night.

  5. Grey

    Grey says:

    @royce!: Thanks! Decemberists were tainted for me because I saw them in concert and they were kinda meh. But this title song is solid, for sure.

  6. Grey

    Grey says:

    @bsa: Ha

  7. royce! says:

    @Grey: Totally agree. I saw them years ago when they were touring for Her Majesty… and while their performance was fine, the venue was small and crowded and it was a hot summer night but Colin made them turn off the fans because he couldn’t hear his vocals. That left a bad impression, so I don’t listen to them nearly as often as I used to.

  8. Wesley W says:

    @Grey – What are your thoughts on spot starting Daniel Hudson tomorrow at home against the Dodgers? I didn’t see him in your Borderline Starts and wondered if I’m just missing something.

  9. There were a lot of cultural references jammed into that first paragraph.

  10. Grey

    Grey says:

    @royce!: I saw them with the LA Phil and they interpreted their songs rather play them. Some people probably would’ve liked it whereas I just wanna hear the songs I know.

    @Wesley W: I like him. He wasn’t listed because he didn’t make the criteria as listed in the post. I’ve liked him for the last two months.

  11. Steve says:

    @Grey: You did the last post on your iPhone?
    Most impressed. At the telcos, we love customers like you. You put food on our tables.
    Any news on Brantley, EYJ and Rajai? Trying to take a point off BSA in steals.

  12. Nuke LaDouche says:

    @Grey: Well Grey you’re advice has gotten me to first in a league filled with douche bags. For that I say thank you, but it’s not over yet. Would you drop LaRoche for Mora, Morse, or some other schmohawk? I must break these turds.

  13. royce! says:

    @Grey: Was that at the Hollywood Bowl? I think I was still living in LA at the time of that show, and was decidedly “meh” about going. Sounds like I made the right choice.

  14. aj says:

    got one spot.
    sale or breslow

  15. El Famous Burrito says:


    I can pick up one pitcher for next week. It’s a standard points league, and its for all the marbles (12 to be exact.)

    Which of these available pitchers will get me that big glass sumbitch that I can give to my Uncle Cleon to replace the glass eye I broke?



  16. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: Looking more ahead to the future, as a pickup for my keeper, would you prefer Carter, Freeman, or Alonso for a CI? (12 Teamer 6X6 ROTO K’s the extra stat for hitters)

  17. TheFunk says:

    @Grey: I’m getting whooped in my H2H finals! Team needs to start hitting. I don’t know if you saw Ziegler blow Anderson’s win in the 9th inning on Wed, but what a joke? I mean, who throws sidearm anymore?? He should play softball.

    Anyhoo, to the point at hand. I need to drop Zimmerman, who in this post is the best replacement you think? I actually don’t need 3B, I slid A. Ramirez into that spot and got a homer today, just need a hitter, maybe some speed, but really RBI potential.

    @Nuke LaDouche: I also have been looking to upgrade Laroche. Prob gonna take Grey’s advice (as usual) and grab Morse.

  18. Grey

    Grey says:

    @TheFunk: Re: Ziegler — Yup. Valencia…

  19. Steve says:

    No Brantley.

  20. big o says:

    it’s that time of year , people .
    time to send some thank-you daiquiris to the guy
    who allows us , pretty much , total freedom of expression , and
    unlimited access to his site .

    not only does he answer each and every question ,
    of which there are many ,
    but does so , with a sense of caring .
    and without charge .
    he’s truly deserving of the inter-net’s fbb good samaritan award .

    but ,
    think of him as THE best waiter at THE best restaurant in town ,
    dependent wholly upon tips , and YOUR goodwill .

    whether you’re a frequent commenter or lurker ,
    whether you finish in the money , or dead last ,
    it’s that time of year .
    time to say thank you .

    what would you do , if , next year , this site didn’t exist ?

    (that’s MY unsolicited rant)
    thank you .

  21. Steve says:

    Braun back.

  22. big o says:

    freaking bautista .
    already ?

  23. sinep says:

    anyone else get trapped in that andrew bailey/jose valverde do loop?

  24. Grey

    Grey says:

    @big o: Thanks for the kind words!

    @Steve: Nice re: Braun. Now if he would just hit.

    @big o: Damn

  25. Grey

    Grey says:

    @sinep: Damn, I meant to tell people to move on after a few loop backs. Hope you didn’t waste too much time.

  26. big o says:

    every time valencia steps up to the plate ,
    his batting coach yells
    “concentrate . concentrate” .

  27. Steve says:

    Sonavabenched by Grandy where I really needed it. Only I will know why I put Thome in instead – and even I don’t know!

    Why do you do this to me, Grandy? After all, I drafted you on. Every. Damn. Team.

  28. Roger Lodge says:

    Hello Mr. Grey,

    First and foremost, thanks for another season of great fantasy advice. My question is what to do about the Kung Fu Panda in my standard keeper league. I was fine with his free-swinging tendencies when he hit .330. It is true that he has an uncanny knack for making contact. Nevertheless, could it be that he is not much more than an average 1B, whose trade value (if there is anything left of it) has hit a brick wall this year? Do you predict a comeback and a return to his AAA numbers or will his free-swinging ways make him a permanent .270 hitter instead of a .300+ hitter? Frankly, I’m thinking of selling high but I would really appreciate some of your advice on the matter. Thanks.

    – Roger

  29. Steve says:

    No Rajai, neither. At least EYJ is back.

  30. big o says:

    best way to start !

    of course , if steve really did pick up freddy sanchez ,
    that has to be taken into consideration .

  31. Steve says:

    @big o: Isn’t it obvious?

  32. VinWins

    VinWins says:

    Liriano left game with undisclosed injury

  33. Steve says:

    Et tu, Infante?

  34. GopherDay says:

    So Bautista is Mr 52 now…What round, oh Greyt Grey, do you foresee him going in next season?

  35. BSA says:

    @Steve: You can borrow that point, I’ll put the call in tomorrow for Tabatta to start running again.

    Maybe Grandy will run tonight and make that point you borrow bittersweet!

  36. Steve says:

    @BSA: He won’t run. Just to spite anyone that owns him.

  37. @Grey: That CI Sandoval crack aimed at me? Had I waived him for Morrison, Betemit, Johnson or any number of hot, Joe Blow infidels last month, I’d have finished in first… and got my ass handed to me by the scorching hot 4 seed, instead of powerbombing the 6 seed through a table. Now that Panda’s extinct my offense is dominating.

    See, all part of the plan!

  38. Elijah says:

    Biig Donking Donkeys.

  39. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: He hates us.

    @Roger Lodge: Not sure now is really the time to sell high. He’s a bench player. I think he’s a .300 hitter with Butler type power, which is barely 20 homers. It’s all right, nothing great.

    @VinWins: Damn!

    @GopherDay: Top 4 rounds easy.

    @3FingersBrown: Not aimed at anyone. Panda’s extinct — ha!

  40. royce! says:

    @Grey: Phoenix puts on a much better show. In 2003 or 2004, I drove from SD to LA to see them at the Troubadour and it was completely worth it. I had thought that they were joking, or at least ironic, until I saw them live and realized that they were damn serious about jams entitled “Funky Squaredance” and “Party Time.”

  41. BSA says:

    @Steve: So tonights homer was to spite me? Yeah Baby!! I don’t mind playing the spiteful bitter FBB manager.

  42. Grey

    Grey says:

    @royce!: Yeah, one of the better shows I’d seen in a while. Weird that they opened with Lisztomania, but they knew what they were doing. Feist was there with them too, but I’m not a huge fan of hers. Too girly. Sorry, 3 lady readers.

  43. Steve says:

    Oh man. Benched Grandy and Pence in the keeper – right when I need AVE in a big way.

  44. big o says:

    chacin’s pitch count is too high … 72 through 4 .
    won’t see the 7th inning .

  45. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: Yeah, I outsmarted myself with Bautista…I traded A-Rod to another team in a package where I received the #1 Minor League draft slot (Bryce Harper baby…For his career!) and I got Bautista as a throw in to the deal. He goes and hits 12 home runs for me, so I start shopping him around to sell “high” on him. I traded him BACK to the team I got him from for a decent prospect deal, and he goes on and hits 30 freakin home runs for the other team!! So I won’t get so worked up over the deal if next year he goes and hits 10 homeruns with a .210 average. And the prospect (Michael Taylor) hits the big leagues with a splash!!

  46. big o says:

    and now , has given up the game’s 1st hit .

  47. VinWins

    VinWins says:

    Nice pitching duel in Colorado – Lincecum, Chacin. Mora replaced by Stewart in the 5th. Haven’t heard why.

  48. BSA says:

    So the story of my season – I decided (against Grey’s suggestion) to let Hudson go this week to pick up Carasco for the past week’s start –
    Carasco gave up 3 earned runs in 6 innings
    Hudson (in FA for the first time this year) has given up an ugly 6 in 5.2

    Whew! Close one!!!

  49. Grey

    Grey says:

    @big o: Just need a win.

    @GopherDay: Yeah, but you couldn’t have known. It’s illogical what he’s doing.

    @VinWins: Damn

    @BSA: There ya go.

  50. BSA says:

    Oooh look at that, Madson gets the save and helps me out in Ks.

    Too bad I am stuck 8 saves back of Al. Bob will be taking the 12 points in Ks due to his starts coming up this week.

  51. big o says:

    come on , rox fanz .
    time for some collective karma .

    bust this freak .

  52. BSA says:

    C’mon Steve call it
    Grandy is up…
    Single off a tired Beckett – steals second?

  53. Steve says:

    Brian – he will do whatever it takes to piss me off.

  54. Kazmere says:

    Morse or Bruce? 10 tm roto, desperate for RBI.

  55. Steve says:

    EYJ! Now steal!

  56. big o says:

    E .. Y
    E .. Y
    O .. (you kid !)

  57. royce! says:

    I’ve lost 5 points on ERA and WHIP over the last two days!

  58. VinWins

    VinWins says:

    @BSA: They were messing with you. Lidge came in and got the save.

  59. royce! says:

    Yahoo’s saying Liriano was removed due to an illness, so he will probably make his next start. Although I could see MIN resting him. And could also see them pulling him just to rest him in the first place.

  60. royce! says:

    @Steve: Grandy had real bad #s against Beckett, which is why I benched him. But that was apparently against the old Beckett.

    Wish I would’ve at least benched him for someone who was gonna start- I started David Murphy over him.

  61. Grey

    Grey says:

    @royce!: Grizzly Bear actually opened for Phoenix that night I was there. I don’t know them so it was hard for me to enjoy them.

    @royce!: Liriano’s not pitching again. I didn’t read that anywhere, but I’m guessing since he’s opening up the playoff series.

  62. big o says:

    crap . crap . crap .
    crap the bat .

  63. royce! says:

    @Grey: Hmm… let’s just say that I wouldn’t be surprised if an ad for Prop 19 had Grizzly Bear as a soundtrack. Or at least that’s how I perceive them.

    Dick Enberg just announced that “Johnny Votto” isn’t in the starting lineup tonight. I very quickly lost my excitement about Enberg announcing SD home games, and this is a perfect example of why.

  64. royce! says:

    According to ESPN, WAS scored a run because of a throwing error by Billy Wagner (who promptly struck out the next 3 batters), yet they’re listing the runs as earned. This is wrong, correct? A pitcher can’t earn a run that’s caused by the pitcher’s error, right?

  65. Steve says:

    Freddy Sanchez 0-4. Of course he is.

  66. Grey

    Grey says:

    @royce!: Error by a pitcher is viewed the same as an error by a fielder. Is there a song/album of Bear I should check out?

    @Steve: Ha

  67. Grey

    Grey says:

    @ThE sHiT: Thanks for the heads up!

  68. ThE sHiT says:

    Good thing I dropped Garcia so I could stream in his roster spot. Probably going to have to do that with Liriano’s spot also. Bummerman indeed.

  69. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: No problem

  70. ThE sHiT says:

    Nice starts by Blanton and Chacin, not so much so my James McD…

  71. Grey

    Grey says:

    @ThE sHiT: Yup, stupid unpredictable Astros.

  72. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: Hope the Astros suck against Volquez. How much do you like Stauffer?

  73. Grey

    Grey says:

    @ThE sHiT: I like him a lot this week. Padres are playing for something and he’s home then in another pitchers park.

  74. Kazmere says:

    Hey Grey, Morse or Bruce, 10 tm roto? need HR. Thanks!

  75. Kazmere says:

    One more. Chris Johnson or Betemit?

  76. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: Koo, I’ll use him with confidence then. I have 8 moves left and will be using most of them on streamers, but will save a couple for hot bench bats.

  77. royce! says:

    @Grey: Give “Deep Blue Sea” off the Friend EP (and also the Dark Is The Night compilation) a listen.

    I like they’re second record, Yellow House, more than the more recent Veckatimist. “Knife” and “On a Neck, On a Spit,” from Yellow House are great; I really recommend listening to the record in its entirety if you dig either. From Veckatimist, “Two Weeks” is worth a listen.

  78. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: Gotta start Garza vs. SEA, right?

  79. Kazmere says:

    One more more. Start Lester @NYY?

  80. BSA says:

    Felipe Lopez to the Sawx? I am obviously a Sawx fan and cannot noodle this one.

  81. royce! says:

    @royce!: Ouch, man. I just used “they’re” when I meant “their”. I blame the cold I’ve been trying to kill since I got back from NY.

  82. big o says:

    ok , amateurs , listen up , THIS is how you whine :

    after leading my points-based , h2h , keeper-league from day one ,
    my pitchers , for the final are an astonishing 0 for 9 , including :
    haren… 7.0 innings , 3 ha , 0 er , nd
    felix ….8.0 , 2 ha , 1 er , loss
    de la ….7.0 , 6 ha , 3 er , loss
    capuano 6.0 , 4 ha , 2 er , nd
    chacin .. 7.0 , 3 ha , 2 er , loss

    meanwhile , my opponent has 6 wins , from 8 starts ,
    including wins tonight , by beckett and myers … who EACH gave up 5 runs .

    stir in , my hamilton/on the shelf vs
    his bautista/unconscious ,
    until my blood pressure boils ,
    and THAT ‘s how a seasoned whiner rolls .

  83. Grey

    Grey says:

    @big o: Ha, nice rant.

  84. BSA says:

    @Grey: Reading it again it was purely for draft picks. They have enough utility infielders, notice Theo’s underling in San Diego also put in the claim.

    Why does Lopez care where he goes?

  85. Kazmere says:

    You like Travis Wood @SD?

  86. royce! says:

    Love that your only post at KitchenSnark so far is about the term “donkey punch.” You must have a very discerning agent. “We’re building a brand here!”

  87. Grey

    Grey says:

    @BSA: Gotcha

    @Kazmere: Yeah, it’s all right.

  88. Jake in Columbus says:

    Twinkies are @ KC 1st 3 games, so do you still roll with Valencia over Betemit who has better home numbers too but gets all 7 games there?

  89. big o says:

    jansen not kuo vs drew ?

  90. Wilsonian says:

    Now that’s what I’m talking about… Current pitching line for the night with Verlander, Lincecum, Arroyo, Kershaw and Lyon throwing:

    31 innings, 3 wins, 1 save, 33 ks, 0 walks (which we count), 1.16 ERA, 0.52 WHIP, 9.58 ks/9.

    I know basking in my glory dooms me for the rest of my series, but I couldn’t contain myself.

  91. Vince says:

    Grey, how would you rank these starters for Sunday?

    Carmona vs KC
    Westbrook @ ChC
    Maholm vs Hou
    Bailey @ SD
    Capuano vs Fla
    Saunders vs LAD

  92. royce! says:

    Aroldis- 18 pitches so far, all 100+. I know it’s just the Padres, but he’s making em look silly (and if it wasn’t Petco, Ludwick woulda homered).

  93. royce! says:

    But it’s alright, cause we’re saved by the Bell!

  94. Chris says:


    Thoughts on Holland @ Oak, Kazmir v. CWS, or Guthrie @ Tor?

  95. Chris says:


    On the above post, I’m in a close ERA/WHIP/QS matchup, are any of the above worth a pickup since my opponent is out of moves?

  96. @Grey: I’m joking. I know that wasn’t aimed at me, I just feel like an ass for holding on to Panda so long. Figured a guy with such a high contact rate would eventually get it going. Oh well. Surprise years from Swish and McGehee have made up for it for the most part.

    After wins from Waino and Blanton we’re looking good. Dump Jaime for Stauffer next week? Have another move left but noone is really peaking interest.

  97. Steve says:

    @Grey: Got 46 innings left in the keeper. Have Bills @ DBacks and Cain @ Rockies available to me on Sunday. Feel a bit leery about both – what do you think?

    Particularly in view of the fact that I have the likes of Oswalt @ Nats, Bald Jim and Chacin v Dodgers and Erv-Sav v Okaland coming up later in the week…

  98. mc serch says:

    Tabata has a knee issue…dont see him running crazy over the final week …looking at Dyson and Bourgeous(sp) instead to run down stretch.

  99. dave says:

    Should I leave Nova on the Bench today against Boston?

  100. GopherDay says:

    There’s no way 4 relievers will throw 11 innings right? (Koji, Takahashi, Storen, and Adams…) I have 11 IP left, and have 4 starters going tomorrow.

  101. zombie says:

    Final day tomorrow. Don’t need a WIN out of any of these dudes; just some solid Ks & would appreciate that they not violate my ERA & WHIP in the process. Could you please recommend a first then second choice from this swill:
    Moseley vs. BOS
    Pena @ LAA
    Jurrjens @ WAS
    Porcello vs MIN
    Saunders vs. LAD
    Thanks (& neglected to commend the always appreciated Kamala reference the other day. Truly an underated, deceptively agile, Ugandan grappler. Unfortunately undone by his ophidiophobia.)

  102. big o says:


    if whip and era are of no concern ,
    you should pick up as many additional SP’s as your league allows ,
    to augment the 4 that you have going on sunday ,
    to maximize your wins and k’s categories .

    in one league , i have 9 SP’s going on sunday .

  103. zombie says:

    Jurrjens is not starting Sunday.
    & Montero is apparently having a baby.

  104. paulzone says:

    will wolf get two more starts?

  105. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: Alright, are any of these pitchers worth the risk of grabbing and starting my final pitching day tomorrow?

    Saunders vs LAD
    Carmona vs KC
    De La Rosa vs SF
    Duesing @ DET

    I would like Ks without crapping up my ERA and WHIP. 12 Teamer btw.

  106. Wilsonian says:

    @Grey: yeah, I’m almost afraid to start anyone now, but he’s still starting pitchers because his ERA is awful and he doesn’t really care, so I’ll lose out on Ks if I don’t start anyone. My ERA is at 1.66 and my WHIP is 0.81. His ERA is 4.79 and WHIP is 1.39.

    Also, the FA picker upper strikes again. He took Scherzer off of waivers after I dropped him. He’s not keeping him over Wainwright and F-Her…he’s just cock-blocking the guys still playing for the championship.

  107. GopherDay says:

    Also, is it alright if I drop some top tier guys I can’t keep for the last week of the season? So like McCann, pick up some pitcher for my last start tomorrow, then pick up a Schmok for the last couple of days. I mean what’s McCann going to get me? 3-4 more homers max?

  108. GopherDay says:

    @GopherDay: No one else can keep him either…unless they spend a 1st round pick on him, which I wouldn’t mind…

  109. @Grey: Stick with Westbrook for the final week or dump him for Pelf, Freddy Garcia, Joe Saunders, Luke French?

    My ratios are shot, but I’m a up a little in W, QS, K. Up 4-3 in saves, I could also conceivable drop Slowey for Hensley, Gutierrez or Sale.

  110. Earl Battey says:

    I’m not sure which way to go with my pitching staff for the rest of the way. I currently have a 2 save lead on the rest of the league (3rd place is 12 back). The second place guy is running 2 closers this week (Feliz and Street). I’m trailing 2 guys by five wins. I have Papelbon, Soriano and Capps, and there are a few Brain Freezes on the wire. How many closers should I start? If I go with two, then I could run another 2-start guy such as Carrasco or Stauffer.

    What do you think? As always, thanks for the help.

  111. Earl Battey says:

    Follow up question. . .

    Chasing wins but also concerned with ERA and WHIP since we’re pretty tightly bunched together. Can you rank these options?

    Gio: @ SEA
    Stauffer: Cubs, @SF
    Carrasco: Det, @CWS

  112. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: Okay, how does Porcello and Richard go in there? In between dlR, Duesing and the others?

  113. Steve says:

    Ugh. Up at 5am to get early flight to head off on vacay.
    I’ll be watching…

  114. @Grey: I’m thinking I can throw Westbrook out there tomorrow vs. the Cubs and then dump him (he should get one more start vs. The Rox next week) for two from Pelf, Garcia, etc just to try and accumulate counting numbers. I’m only allowed to make moves during the playoffs on Sunday anyway.

  115. GopherDay says:

    Okay, I’ve got….

    Cahill vs TEX
    dlR vs SF
    Richard vs CIN
    Duesing @ DET
    Hamels vs NYM
    Billingsley @ ARI
    Bailey @ SD
    Westbrook @ CHC

    Wish me luck!!

  116. vottomatic says:

    i”m currently in second place, by a very small margin, in my 10 team auction mix league. going in to this last week i need a first baseman b/c dusty ( dickhead) baker is bench votto with a ” sinus infection”. would you run melvin mora out there for the last week since he’s hitting and the rockies are still hunting for a playoff spot?

    also, if i lose this league dusty i would open your mailbox for a while b/c i know your reading this post.

  117. paddytwotimes says:

    Do I drop or bench B. Phils or Jose Reyes in the last week for Aviles?

    Also, should I drop Hudson for a two start pitcher?

    Morse taking Rasmus spot ok?

  118. malacoda says:

    I must give props for the O Valencia reference. If you haven’t seen the Decemberists live, it is a great show.

  119. malacoda says:

    In fact, don’t forget to use a Mariner’s Revenge reference some day. That is what one of the greatest songs ever written in my opinion. The music is esoteric, but the lyrics are unsurpassed.

  120. Earl Battey says:

    MMD, Betemit or Valencia for the last week? I have the best chance of making up a point in either HRs or runs.


  121. paddytwotimes says:

    Thanks Grey.

    B. Phils has just been so terrible the last two weeks

  122. vinko says:

    Votto is back in the lineup this afternoon.

  123. paulzone says:

    carpenter shat the bed…

  124. paulzone says:

    espinosa or kinsler?

  125. paulzone says:

    pick two outta: peralta, uribe, valencia…

  126. peter says:

    @paulzone: Only 2 of the runs are earned, so far. But so much for a bounce-back start this week. He’s not even giving us any Ks. Just tying us to the WHIPping Post.

  127. Fresh says:

    Chris Johnson or Pedro Alvarez for next week?

  128. peter says:

    @peter: For whatever reason, all of the runs have now been scored as earned. I think this is bs. I was watching the game and Anderson (catcher) committed a terrible throwing error in a run down that would have ended the inning.

  129. Jake in Columbus says:

    A Gonz has weak matchups this week in my Util spot. Worth benching for Betemit, Aviles or the like? Those two are swapping 2B & 3B as an experiment, which may affect both at the plate. Swap Aviles in for Alexei instead? He has pretty good matchups though, same for Raburn. Mainly looking for RBI & AVG.

  130. Wilsonian says:

    Damn, just noticed that Longo is out for a little bit…glad I didn’t miss that memo.

  131. Martin says:

    @grey- would u start porcello tom vs. MIN in a 12 team mixed league? I imagine the twins wont be playing for much as they already clinched

  132. Martin says:

    @grey- also would u drop longo now that he is out till some time next week?

  133. Vince says:

    @Grey: Thanks Grey!

  134. Lines says:

    Jon Fucking Lester. That is all. I can’t believe I’m saying it, but everyone should go turn on Fox.

  135. peter says:

    @Lines: Ha!

    Razzball Comment Threads: Where No Hitters Go to Die

  136. peter says:

    O Valencia!

  137. Martin says:

    @grey- i hate when you own the batter and the pitcher. aka i owned valencia when he hit a grand slam off my bonderman spot start. ah

  138. peter says:

    @Martin: Could be worse; at least it was YOUR guy who hit the slam. (<–only small consolation)

  139. Lines says:

    @Peter – Don’t say that kinda thing, dude. I’m a Sox fan, I couldn’t live with myself.

    …Sorry, everyone.

  140. Anonymous says:

    I approve of Valencia.

  141. paulzone says:

    @Grey: sweet call on Valencia! Money!

  142. BSA says:

    Damn, end of season stats and no movement – 5 HRs and 14 RBIs for nothin’ except keeping pace.


  143. Wilsonian says:

    Pick 3: Valencia, Venable, Ibanez, Hart, Victorino. I’m thinking the Phils might bench the regulars a bit once they clinch, and the other guys might have more promise. What say you sir?

  144. Grey

    Grey says:

    @BSA: Yeah, tough to make headway.

    @Wilsonian: Valencia, Hart, Victorino…

  145. Wilsonian says:

    @Grey: thanks man. Is it bad that I’m at a wedding, drinking beer, and still worried about fantasy baseball transactions, or is that just dedication?

  146. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Wilsonian: Nah, dedication. You gotta beat your Pops!

  147. GopherDay says:

    Rangers clinch AL West, Hamilton nowhere to be seen because he can’t have any alcohol. Later Ron Washington found him in a dark alleyway with his Coke. As in Coca-Cola, but I know what you were thinking.

  148. Elijah says:

    Tulp says: Don’t be a Doubtin’ Dan.

  149. Wilsonian says:

    @Grey: ha, well played! I feel some serious Razzball love that you remembered I’m in a league with my pops. But I already knocked him out a couple weeks ago! Ha!

  150. Wilsonian says:

    Is it worth it to try out Avila over AJ for the final week?

  151. @Grey: I was talking about Freddy “The Rock” Garcia… Looking to overwhelm my opponent with counting numbers – although Carpenter and Grienke crapped all over him today, putting me ahead in ratios too. Up 11-1 now, only trailing saves 5-4.

  152. Earl Battey says:

    Who’s most likely to hit a couple of HRs this week. . . it’s nearly impossible for me to make up any ground in avg, though I might have a shot at gaining in HRs and runs with a big week.

    Could you pick 2 from AHill, Betemit, Quentin, Gaby Sanchez or Luke Scott?


  153. Bum Juice says:


    I woke up this morning excited to go check on Lester’s line, and then it quickly dawned on me that, in a weekly league, I was also still locked into Greinke’s start v the Indians. Looking at that turd’s line, and the way it absolutely soiled Lester’s, I decided to climb back into bed.

    And lying there, like Buddha under the Bodhi Tree, it suddenly dawned on me, without the help of internet anagram solvers:

    Greinke = Reeking

  154. Eddy says:

    No harm in sitting Hamels in your matchup when I’m up in Ks, ERA, WHIP, and W (all by a good margin) and he has no one going right?

  155. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: Start Bills @ ARI today? Nice game by Garza, needed that. Good morning! I’m still drunk from last night. And I’m random right now. Have a great day beating the heat!

  156. Grey

    Grey says:

    @ThE sHiT: Yeah, it’s hot as dog balls. I’m sitting Bills in one league and starting him in another. I don’t trust him at all.

  157. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: Summer came out of hibernation realized it hadn’t been doing it’s job the past couple months. So, it decided to hit us full force. I don’t trust him either. I don’t necessarily need to start Bills because I am streaming anyway. So, still start him?

  158. Grey

    Grey says:

    @ThE sHiT: I’d start him if I were streaming.

  159. Art Vandelay says:

    Grey, just wanted to say thanks for the helping me win my league by 20 points this season! I ran away with the league around the all-star break and basically spent the last month taking a victory lap. I’ll be buying you a daiquiri shortly. Here is my roster, just for posterity’s sake. You will note the Razzball influence, and my pitching staff has been awesome (Price, Bucholz, Kershaw all drafted in the 100s).

    C: Ruiz (Soto until he got injured)
    1B: Logan Mo (Morneau until he got injured)
    2B: Weeks (awesome)
    SS: Hanley
    3B: Zimmerman
    2B/SS: Raburn (formerly Starlin, Callaspo, Sean Rod, other assorted schmohawks)
    1B/3B: Adam LaRoche
    OF: Adam Jones
    OF: Brett Gardner (WW pickup of the year)
    OF: Swisher
    OF: Rajai Davis
    OF: Choo (traded Bucholz for him mid-season)
    UTIL: Murphy
    Other notable team members: Jason Bay (epic fail), Tejada (solid down the stretch), Ibanez (mostly fail), Jay Bruce (traded C.J. Wilson for him mid-season), Tyler Colvin, Jose Guillen (early season power), Mike Stanton

    P: King Felix
    P: Price
    P: Kershaw
    P: Hamels
    P: Jar-Jar
    P: Marmol
    P: Valverde
    P: Street
    P: Juan Gut
    P: Hensley
    Former pitchers (traded or dropped some due to start cap): Bucholz, C.J. Wilson, Javy Vazquez, Leo Nunez, Edwin Jackson (AL version), Ian Kennedy

  160. tHe sHiT says:

    @Grey: Gotcha. I read Lirianos player note on Yahoo n it said he will probably make his next start. If playoffs start on tuesday, it would make sense to pitch him on thursday cuz he would be going on regular rest. Also, Zimmermans note sounded optimistic. But i think we have a better chance of seeing Liriano play again before our playoffs are over. BTW, awesome call on Valencia! I dont know how u do it, but you are usually spot on with ur calls. Keep up the Grey(t) work!

  161. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Art Vandelay: Nicely done! You know what was a huge help? F-Her combined with guys who actually won games like Price and Buchholz (to an extent).

    @tHe sHiT: Thanks for the kind words! I think Liriano starts once more and goes maybe 6 IP. They have no reason to push him, unfortunately if you need him.

  162. Barry Heanbag says:

    Hey Grey,

    Two starts left that need to be streamed. Who do you think I should grab of these 4?

    Blackburn @ KC
    Richard vs Cin.
    Wolf @ NYM
    Carrasco vs Det

    Thanks also for your help this season, I’m in a tight race for first right now but it looks like I’ll be able to pull it out.

  163. Bob says:

    @Grey: I was just reading through today’s posts and it raised a question in my mind – how do you get such good posters? On every other commenter website I’ve ever read, there are spammers, trolls, insane people, and assorted other nogoodnicks. Here, almost everybody is smart, funny, and actually helpful. As I read this back, it’s more of a comment than a question, but I think it’s great to have a place like this on the internet.

    On a personal note, thanks Houston fielders for screwing up my Grey-approved J.A. Happ stream with your errors. [Insert insane rant here]

  164. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Barry Heanbag: Richard, Blackburn… No problem.

    @Bob: Honestly, I ask myself that a lot, but I have no idea. In our high months of early spring, there’s a few morons here and there, but they don’t stick around because I ignore them and the good commenters do stick around because I help them. I’m guessing here, maybe it’s just good karma.

  165. Bill Lumbergh says:

    @Grey et al: Need help setting my pitching lineup for my H2H championship game (weekly lineups)!!! Need to pick 5 of the following 7 SPs:
    1) Lincecum @ARI
    2) Verlander @CLE
    3) Gallardo @NYM
    4) Cliff Lee SEA & ANA(???)
    5) Hudson @LA
    6) Matusz @TB & DET
    7) Slowey @KC & TOR

    Also, on the same team, should I start Chacin @ RP rather than either Wagner or Street. Points scoring system.

    Thanks for the help everyone & wish me luck!!!

  166. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Bill Lumbergh: First five SPs… Chacin over Street if you need the SP, good luck!

  167. struggler says:

    I’m heading into the finals in my H2H OBP/QS league. Yah!
    Alot of new options because of desperation drops. I only have 12 moves left so I have to make the most of them.

    Who do you recommend occupying my MI slot for the week:
    EY, Rollins, Zobrist, Desmond, Asdrubal, Espinosa

    Jaso, Montero, Doumit

    Bench bat:
    Bruce, Nyjer, Bourgeois, Hunter

    And would you start either of these 2 sexy under achievers:
    Carp vs. Col or Greinke vs TB

    As always Thanks!

  168. Grey

    Grey says:

    @struggler: Zobrist, Montero, Nyjer (for steals), Hunter otherwise, I wouldn’t start either of those SPs unless the situation was dire.

  169. tHe sHiT says:

    @Grey: Thanks for assuring me to start Bills even though we were both reluctant. Those 13 Ks are really going to help me. Also, thanks for recommending C. Lewis. Nice line for a stream start. Im beating the heat with some ice cold XX. Hope you have something cold to keep you cool.

  170. vottomatic says:

    i’m in second place in my 10 team auction keeper league by a very slim margin. however, i have alot of guys on teams that have already clinched playoff spots. that being said should i start joey votto or melvin mora at first this week and kinsler or aviles/espinosa/ mora at second this week and zobrist or aviles at shortstop. my pitching is in for bucholz, bills, hudson, stauffer, and carassco. also i picked up daniel murphy for the final week. let me know what you think and wish me luck…… 500 hundo or bust

  171. herschel says:

    @Grey: been off the grid this weekend….is zimmerman safe to drop yet or is there still a hope he might return?

  172. Grey

    Grey says:

    @tHe sHiT: Nice, glad it worked out!

    @vottomatic: Start Votto, Espinosa and Aviles. Good luck!

    @herschel: Drop him, he’s done.

  173. herschel says:

    @Grey: thanks. dyson vs young for sbs?

  174. Rick Dempsey says:

    @Grey: Really need your help. I need an OF that can steal, was thinking Denard Span but with his foot injury last night not sure if I should go for it. What should I do?

  175. Black Beard says:

    Thinking about starting M. Young at 3B, N. Walker at UTIL, and sitting Matt Kemp the final week of the season. Desperation?

  176. Black Beard says:

    @Grey: Start Kemp over Young? Other options include Quentin or A-Ram. Thanks Grey! Last question of the 2010 season.

  177. Wilsonian says:

    @Grey: I totally agree with Bob’s comment. The people on this site, yourself included, are generally great, helpful, and pretty entertaining. This site, in conjunction with fantasy baseball in general, has pretty much been the bain of my existence since late March when I discovered Razzball, but I thank you for it. My girlfriend hates me and my constant stalking of everything fantasy, but I’m ok with that. Anythewho…on to an actual question:

    Can you rank these dudes for the last week o’ the season: Kemp, Victorino, Hart, Krispie, Alvarez, Pierre, Morse, Venable, Stubbs, Pacman? Right now I’m up a steal, tied in HRs, down an RBI, and down 2 hits and runs, so I need a bit of everything.

    I know it’s a long list, but I’m trying to figure out who I should be streaming this last week. There are so many damn intangibles with people sitting, teams clinching, studs simply being terrible (I’m talking to you, Matt), that my brain is going to explode. I’ve got a maximum of $330 on the line here (although the least I can win is $160), so I’m wanting to do this shizz right. Much appreciated, as usual.

  178. Wilsonian says:

    Also for Tuesday, rank these starters:

    Wolf @Metco; Volquez v.Hou; Blackburn @KC. Thanks dood.

  179. Jake in Columbus says:

    Finding myself down a few SB and some AVG for the last week of the finals. Close in R and RBI, comfortable in HR. Plan to bench Gardner since he’ll sit vs. LH aside from sucking lately. Looking at guys like E Young (not hitting lately, plus that shin), Rajai, Venable, Dyson, Borbon, Rasmus, etc. as options. Any of them stick out? Fine with punting SB to maintain the rest if it makes more sense.

  180. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Black Beard: Go with Kemp.

    @Wilsonian: Hehe, yeah, girlfriends may not like Razzball. Krispie, Hart, Kemp, Victorino, Pacman, Pierre, Alvarez, Stubbs, Morse…

    @Wilsonian: Volquez, Wolf…

    @Jake in Columbus: Go with Rajai…

  181. Jake in Columbus says:

    @Grey: Thanks man. Wives probably don’t like Razzball either, until they find out it helped pay for date night after the season’s over.

  182. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Jake in Columbus: Yeah, probably true. Not sure what a consolation of 6 months of fantasy is for one date night, but they’ll take what they can get, I suppose.

  183. ThE sHiT says:

    @Grey: I hope your still awake… Am I holding onto Zimm too long? I have a weird feeling he’ll come back for the final weekend series. I know my opponent will pick him up and I don’t feel comfortable dropping him until the word is official. I don’t need anything in particular, he’s on the bench. Would probably pick up a stream starter or the hottest bat I can find. Can you please guide me? Thanks!

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