Tommy Hanson is having his next start pushed back. Â Well, it’s not official yet according to the Braves. Â But they read Razzball, so we’ll just say it’s official now. Â Even if Hanson’s next start isn’t pushed back, it should be. Â On Saturday he looked like Rocky Dennis trying on a fitted ball cap. Â If you got nothing nice to say, say nothing. Â Athletes live by that adage. Â So when the media asked Hanson about his shoulder after the game on Saturday, he refused to talk about it. Â Earlier in the year, Hanson went to the DL with rotator cuff tendinitis. Â A’la Paul Hogan, “That’s not a red flag… THIS IS A RED FLAG!” Â My best guess is he’ll be on the Disgraceful List by this time tomorrow. Â What time am I writing this? Â Geez, a little in my business, no? Â Let’s just say it’s prior to dinner, but after my afternoon Cheetos break. Â Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jason Kubel – 3-for-4 with his 9th homer. Â He now has three homers in the last six games. Â When I say hot, you say schmotato… Hot… Schmotato… Hot…Schmotato… Pot…Schmo– Gotcha!
Jesus GuzmanÂ – 2-for-5, 2 RBIs and a steal. Â Has now hit in 9 out of his last 10 games. Â Jesus obviously feels right at home with the Friars.
Chase Headley – Out for 6 weeks with a fractured pinkie. Â His Inky, Blinky and Clyde are said to be resting comfortably.
Heath Bell – 1/3 IP, 3 ER and the blown save in Metco. Â If you’re upset about your treatment while a Met, that’s not exactly how you prove people wrong. Â Cust kayin’.
Jason Bay – 1-for-3 with his 2nd homer in three games, and he’s also 6 for his last 11 as he spices up the Mets’ lineup with a little of the old Bay.
Mike MinorÂ – Hasn’t been all peaches and cream so far for Minor, but he could take Hanson’s place if he is indeed bumped. Â Hey, when a pitcher is struggling and bumped from a rotation, we should call that bumping uglies. Â Okay, carry on.
Alex GonzalezÂ – 1-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 10th homer. Â He’s now hit in 9 of the last 10 games, which is a polite way of saying he’s hitting around .280 in the last ten games. Â Maybe Adam Dunn is the only one impressed by that.
Scott Baker – 6 IP, 5 ER. Â Sounds like he’s headed to the DL again. Â Too bad, so sad.
Jeremy Hellickson – 7 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners, 7 Ks. Â ERA now sits at 3.05 to go with a 1.14 WHIP. Â His Ks are a little low, but Hellickson’s having a, um, hell of a year. Â I could see the Rays being conservative with his innings towards the tail end of the year once they’re (un)officially eliminated.
Carlos Carrasco – To the DL for the 2nd time with right elbow inflammation. Â He still has a suspension to serve too, so that’s ‘bow biding.
Shin-Soo Choo – Hitless in his first rehab game. Â Sounds like he picked up right where he left off!
Alex Rios – 2-for-4 with a steal. Â Speaking of zombies, he must’ve got a talking to from his agent last week about how much money he won’t earn if he continues to lollygag because he’s 7 for his last 13. Â Though I wouldn’t be exactly confident in trusting him again, i.e. if you pick up Rios, you may get all wet. Â Spanish pun point! Â Or puno!
J.J. Hardy – 3-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 20th homer. Â If you would’ve jumped out of DeLorean in April and told me one of my best pickups in multiple leagues would be J.J. Hardy, I would’ve called you a mental patient or said I had a bunch of teams not doing very well. Â The latter’s not exactly untrue, assuming I know my latter from my former.
Josh Johnson – Threw for 10 minutes yesterday. Â Sweet, now if he can get in one pitch every three seconds, he’s ready for big league action!
J.D. Martinez – Homered on Saturday and went deep again yesterday. Â And that’s about all the enthusiasm I can work up for an Astros hitter. Â I mean, their corner outfielders right now are J.D Martinez and J.B. Shuck. Â Where’s I.P. Freely?
Homer Bailey – 3 IP, 5 ER. Â Aren’t you glad you listened to me and didn’t pick him up? Â Oh, you didn’t listen. Â Well, I guess you’ll blame that on me too.
Jay Bruce – Homered yesterday. Â How does he go from 12 homers in May to next to nothing for two-plus months? Â Does he want to be maddeningly frustrating? Â Because that’s about as much fun as trying to say maddeningly.
Seth Smith – The Lisper’s Nightmare went deep twith.
Placido Polanco – Said he hopes to play through a sports hernia. Â That takes balls.
Bobby Jenks – Undergoing a colonoscopy. Â Ironically enough, Colon just got his Jenks tested. Â It required turning to his left and coughing.