For owners bemoaning Al-Ram’s bad start, it could be worse. You could have Whore-Ram (Horacio Ramirez). (BTW, only fantasy baseball could convince a straight man that a Man-Ram is more preferable to a Whore-Ram. BTW II, How do you go from a Whore-Ram to a Man-Ram? An Ass-Cab (Asdrubal Cabrera).) Or you could have Ram-Ram. […]
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And David Ortiz goes pop. For Patriots’ Day, the Sawx had a special throwback day where Varitek went yard, Pedroia acted like an MVP and David Ortiz acted less jenky than he had all season. Fulfilling their end of the bargain was Mark Hendrickson and the Orioles bullpen. *SCHMALTZ ALERT* Rudy and I went to […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?In yesterday’s game, Matt Kemp had 2 HRs and 5 RBIs. On the season, he’s batting .383 with 3 HRs, 14 RBIs, 12 Runs and 4 steals. The 7th spot in the order is killing his value like Daniel Craig killed the Bond series. Kemp’s a solid choice for NL MVP and I could see […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Robinson Cano? Please tell me you’re not going to suggest we buy into Robinson Cano? Please, Grey, I was beginning to find you halfway intelligent. Sorry, random italicized voice, I’m a glutton for punishment. Someone has a terrific season the previous year (Pedroia) and I pull back. A player craps the bed in the previous […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Alex Gordon revealed yesterday that he would require hip surgery and would miss a few months. Willie Bloomquist owners rejoice! Obviously this isn’t great news for Gordon. That’s 99 red balloons for your fearless leader, Grey. I loved me some Alex Gordon. Though, as fate would have it, I didn’t actually get him on any […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?I wrote this blurb about Daisuke Matsuzaka, then ran it through an online Japanese translator then converted it back to English. Here’s what came out — “Dice-K’s arm fell asleep! You wish he was going to recover like Tom Cruise in The Last Samurai after he found humility. There’s nothing you can do. Overreact and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?I think I’m approximately six weeks late on this, but if you read Razzball daily (of course you do, you reader, you!) then you’ve read before some, if not all, of these predictions. So what now? Read them again. They won’t hurt you. Plus now that I’ve put all of my ‘preseason’ predictions in one […]
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Milledge Charged With A Minors Rap
April 15, 2009 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 104 Commentsby: Grey
Lastings Milledge was sent to the minors yesterday clearing room for Elijah Dukes to cover for him in center and probationary hearings. Luckily, on his way out of town, Milledge stopped by Razzball HQ with some “word science.” After you read the rhymes Milledge dropped, feel free to drop him. Dukes has a good 3 […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?You have ADD and you have no idea how this sentence will end because you’re already reading the comments. You drafted Hanley and traded him for Bonifacio. You’re glad Marco Scutaro has 3rd base eligibility so you can drop Chris Davis. Webb is lucky he was DL’d because you were about to drop him for […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Success Smells Like a Lilly, Failure Just Smells Wang
April 14, 2009 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 83 Commentsby: Grey
Chien-Ming Wang – the two-time 19 game winner – is pitching historically bad. How bad? Some TV highlight show quoted some statistical service that the 15 earned runs he’s given up in the past 2 starts are the most ever for a Yankee pitcher’s first two starts of the year. For fantasy purposes, he’s more […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?The title was part of a special Simpsons that Kim Jong Il commissioned where Ralph Wiggum’s mouth is jammed shut full of Korean bean paste. Stupid American! Last year in 317 ABs, Shin-Soo Choo had 14 HRs and 4 steals while batting .309. Though, as I used to say to one ex-girlfriend, “Beware the small […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Who doesn’t love a good comeback story? Mickey Rourke, Jamie Walters, Wilco’s Sky Blue Sky after a very hit or miss, A Ghost is Born… Now there’s Edwin Jackson. Last night, he pitched a gem. 7 2/3 IP, 1 ER with 89 pitches. I love prospects that seem destined for greatness then fail. (see Alex […]
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