In his last four games, J.J. Hardy has gone 8-for-17 with two homers.  You waited and waited.  Went for a dip in the ocean.  Washed ashore in Finland.  Smoked a bowl with some guy who wore only a potato sack.  Fell asleep on a raft.  Woke up in your kiddie pool wearing your water wings.  And finally Hardy got hot.  In July last year, Hardy hit .339 with 9 homers.  Followed that up with a .294 August and 5 homers.  I know Hardy’s sucked the life out of you with his April through June, but if he’s indeed hot now, and it seems that way, he’ll bat 2nd, he’ll hit some homers and a decent average for a month or so.  He’s currently batting .232.  That’ll come up.  He has 8 homers, he should finish with 25.  Will he always be as delightful as your Finnish friend wearing a potato sack?  No, probably not, but he’s better than he’s been.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Raul Ibanez – Won’t be returning this Friday when eligible.  No set backs; Phils are just taking precautions.  For those wanting to say something derogatory about him, I’d wait until he doesn’t have so much free time.

Casey McGehee – Grand slam yesterday.  Is there anything he can’t do?!  Yeah, keep this up.  But while he’s hot, you really should own him if you need MI help.

J.D. Drew – 3-for-5, batted leadoff.  Who put Ellsbury in the doghouse?  Woof, woof, woof, woof, woof.

Gordon Beckham – 7 for his 13 with a steal and he shares a first name with an alien life form.  Capable of double digit power and steals with a solid average, but this year he might be a bit underseasoned like your Mom’s cooking.  Though worth taking a flier to see if you can catch lightning in a bottle.

Gavin Floyd – 7 2/3 IP, 0 ER.  If you own him, have a cigar, you crazy diamond.

Alexei Ramirez – Left the game after being plunked in the head by Chris Perez.  He’ll be fine.  Surprisingly, he did not swing at the pitch.

Ryan Theriot – HR yesterday.  Back on May 5th when Theriot had 3 homers, frequent commenter, IowaCubs said, “If Theriot hits 4 more homers this year, I’m going to tattoo “PUJOLS” in cyrillic across my forehead.”  Theriot now has 7 homers.  Cust kayin’.

Rich Harden – 7 IP, 1 ER, 9 Ks.  Okay, so who was that other guy wearing Harden’s jersey for the first three months?  Piniella blamed Bradley.

Jake Fox – 2-for-3 as Jakie Foxx batted fourth and continued to play 3rd after interleague. Unathletic… like a fox!

Pat Burrell – HR yesterday.  He has three.  He always gets 30.  Do the math!

Carl Crawford – Stole his 40th base and hit his 7th homer yesterday.  I think he’ll be fine this year, but I’m betting he might be a wee bit overrated going into next year.  And that’s me anticipating me!

Roy Halladay – 6 IP, 2 ER as he returned from the DL.  Don’t worry about the short game (for him).  I’m sure he’ll be throwing 120 pitches and complete games by mid-July.

Randy Choate – Recorded his 4th save yesterday because Howell pitched three days in a row and Maddon refuses to let a righty save a game.

Ricky Nolasco – 8 IP, 2 ER, 8 Ks.  Now has five straight solid starts with only five walks.  From the files of No Kidding, whatever was ailing him before is obviously no longer an issue.

Dan Meyer – Had the opportunity to save the game, but couldn’t close it out and gave way to Nunez.  Meyer’s a real lemon.

David Murphy – Hit a homer and batted third.  Hey, I own him in a league or two, so that’s nice, but third?  Really?

Julio Borbon – Was called up by the Rangers and started as their DH.  Ron Washington said, “We didn’t bring him up here to sit around and watch baseball.”  Grey Albright said, “Cool.  What can we expect from him?”  Ron Washington said, “SAGNOF!”  Grey said, “That works.  Does he stay up after Josh Hamilton returns?”  Washington said, “Quit your prying!”

Luke Hochevar – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners.  He’s suckering you in again, isn’t he?  Stay strong, young Razzball reader.

Miguel Olivo – 3-for-4, and hit his 12th homer.  Matt Wieters went 1-for-4 with an infield single.

Tim Lincecum – Two hitter with 8 Ks.  Still about two years away from his peak years.  Zoinks!

Rick Porcello – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER.  His time in mixed leagues is just about over.  Say your goodbyes and remember, you’ll always have May.

Roy Oswalt – 9 IP, 1 ER, 8 Ks, four baserunners vs. the Padres.  Oswalt issued two walks.  Both to Adrian Gonzalez.  See how easy that is?

Randy Wolf – 6 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners.  Wolf’s the king of the good winless start.

Ubaldo Jimenez – 7 IP, 2 ER.  Vin Scully said, “The Dodgers usually scramble his eggs.”  Last night, Ubaldo made omelettes.

Gary Sheffield/Ryan Church – Comatose Mets Fan, “Church and Sheff went a combined 7-for-10 and the Mets lost?!  Did Delgado, Reyes and Beltran do nothing?”  Oh, Comatose Mets Fan, you have a lot of catching up to do.

Fernando Nieve – 3 1/3 IP, 3 ER. 12 baserunners.  I had to look at the play-by-play for this game because it seemed mathematically impossible to have that many baserunners in less than 4 innings and only give up three runs.  He got lucky.  Now if you press your luck and start him again, you may get a whammy.

Carlos Beltran – He’s exploring micro-fracture knee surgery.  Does he have a tiny knee?  C’mon, Mantle played on no knees for ten years!  Have a scotch and get in the lineup!

  1. and1mcgee says:

    lol @ “That’s me anticipating me!”

  2. BrianKennedy says:

    I think Gordon Beckham is becoming a great bouillabaisseball player.

  3. Elbert says:

    Washington vs. Grey segment & Olive vs. Wieter update just cracked me up, the shizz is downright hilarious!!

    btw, shipping out Porcello 2 weeks ago seemed like a winner now, go Wainwright go!

  4. Mowses says:

    “have a cigar, you crazy diamond” sweeeet

  5. d2bnz says:

    Pat the Bat got his 30 batting in a bandbox , Tropicana is somewhat larger care to revise ……or should I show more patience as I have been shopping him?

  6. cnote says:

    Would you deal away Yunel Escobar to acquire JJ Hardy?

  7. Anon says:

    Is it time to drop Porcello for Correia or Homer Bailey?

  8. Ian, yo. says:

    I’d like to see pictures of that tattoo.

  9. BabyBeluga says:

    5×5 keeper 10 team mixed
    I give Texeira and Soto and get Lincecum and Figgins.
    Currently in first and have Manny coming back, but behind in using up my innings and whip/era is a weakness (as well as steals, currently in 8th place in steals). So the pieces are right, but am I giving too much to get it?
    -Konerko into first, scrub into catcher, Manny in to make up for power loss…

  10. Baron Von Vulturewins

    Baron Von Vulturewins says:

    @cnote: Oh yes sir I would do that yes.

    I wish I’d grabbed Hardy when he’d been on waivers. Actually I couldn’t, because the guy who did had higher priority. Waivers! And I don’t need Hardy — though I’d like to have him when he has his inevitable 9 HR month.

    I really hope the Oswalt we saw last night is the Oswalt we’ll see the rest of the season. Between him and Floyd, my starting staff of Billinsgley, Gallardo and Some Random Retardos is starting to round into shape.

    This is a bit of a repeat question, but:

    Trade Tommy Hanson for Gregg? Or Bailey? Or neither?

    Need saves, getting whupped in WHIP.

  11. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @Baron Von Vulturewins: gregg…i’d need to be desperate for saves. and he’s not doing your ratios any help.

    bailey…hells no.

  12. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @Baron Von Vulturewins: basically, at this point, if you really need saves, i think you could do better for hanson than gregg.

  13. Baron Von Vulturewins

    Baron Von Vulturewins says:

    @ThePoonTycoon: There’s one guy in my league who’s cuckoo for rookie pitchers… so I’m looking at his roster.

    Everyone else is extremely tight-fisted with the closers.

    I don’t really want to trade for saves… I just want to flip Hanson while his numbers look gaudy (4-0, decent ERA).

  14. Mr. Rickey says:

    An obscure Alf reference – wasn’t expecting that.

    A guy just dropped Oswalt in my league – drop Volquez for him?

    Also, I have Yadier at C but could pick up Benjie or Wieters? Worth a move?

  15. i picked up mcghee in my razzball league, already owned him and dealt him in my money H2H league, and who is he facing tonight….

    JOHAN SANTANA…. awesome LOL



  17. Looks like a torn labrum for Webby…he may be out next year as well, some question if the Dbacks even pick up his contract in my mind. Sell sell sell sell….

  18. MJB says:

    In a 5×5 Keeper, how do you compare Mark Reynolds against Holliday, Lind, or Ethier? Owner has those 3 as well as Manny and I need to beef up the OF with a power bat.

  19. Id be real hestiant to trade Mark Reynolds in a keeper league. This guy could be a 30/30 guy for the next 5 years.

  20. Denys says:

    someone offered me Nelson Cruz for Victor Martinez… do I do it?

  21. SRM says:

    @ Grey: Need help with RBI, AVG and 3B in general. Would you try to trade Hanson for Aramis?

    He has 6 guys on the DL (w/ only 2 slots) and is in need of basically all pitching cats.

    It’s a 12-team, 6×6 non-keeper w/ OPS. It would leave me with Johan, Greinke, Haren, Gallardo, Scherzer and Kuroda as my SP’s.

  22. Scott says:

    @SRM: Yes, but if you could pry Wright from a frustrated owner for Haren, that would be the most desirable.

  23. Jobu's rum says:

    Sweet ALF reference. Thanks for the stroll down prime-time memory lane!

  24. jamesllegade says:

    Good lord man! When did hips become the new Tommie John?

    Carlos Del Gado
    Brett Myers
    Alex Gordon

    I haven’t seen this many torn labrum’s since prom night!

  25. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @Mr. Rickey: uh yes, i would most definitely drop volquez for a quality starter. i think this may be a lost season for volquez.

  26. SRM says:

    @jamesllegade: Haha. It’s steroid effects settling in for at least half the cases if you ask me. Worst outbreak since the hula hoop craze of the late 50’s.

  27. AL KOHOLIC says:

    as an owner of aramis,im worried about lou resting him a bunch and of the injury resurfacing

  28. bobbo says:

    In a keeper league where you are not limited to how long you keep someone, who would you rather have at the end of the year: Carlos Beltran or Adam Jones? I’m getting worried about Beltran’s knees… every year it’s something!

  29. In a small 10 Team 1 Catcher League (also have V-Mart), picked up So-So Soto to use as trade bait; and even with his phony resurgence have received absolutely NO interest. Looking to cut the line and replace with any of Taveras (forgot how to hit) , Stewart (playing time ? – Trade Atkins!), Burrell (nice when groovin’, worse when not), or the perfectly documented above, recently delightful Hardy. Any preferences?

  30. JPH says:

    Start Smoltz tonight vs O’s?

  31. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @SRM: i think steroids are showing up more with the general decline of players in the 33-35 range, whereas in the late 90s/early 00s, you had multiple guys in the 35-40 range going for .300-35-120 every year.

  32. Mr Baseball says:

    Laurel and J J Hardy – Well, that’s another fine mess you’ve gotten me into. … drafting J J Hardy

  33. Grey

    Grey says:

    @and1mcgee: Hehe

    @BrianKennedy: That’s funny.

    @Elbert: Thanks, and nice move.

    @d2bnz: I’d show more patience, but it depends what you need and what you can get for him.

    @Anon: I’d go with Correia.

    @Ian, yo.: Me too!

    @BabyBeluga: Sounds like it makes sense for you.

    @Mr. Rickey: I’d lose Yadier for Bengie and lose Volquez for Oswalt.

    @Tony Y: Nice grab. Even better trade if you got something worthwhile.

    @elijah: Ouch. Thanks for the update!

    @MJB: I’d trade Reynolds for Holliday or Manny, but I don’t necessarily think it’s a slam dunk win for you.

    @Denys: I’d take V-Mart there. It’s fair though.

    @SRM: Sure

    @Jobu’s rum: You’re welcome.

    @jamesllegade: Ha!

    @AL KOHOLIC: Hmm… That’s an interesting thought. If Fox continues to hit too…

    @bobbo: Ugh, tough decision. Think you have to go with Jones.

    @zombie: Go with Hardy.

    @JPH: I would, pretty sure Rudy wouldn’t.

    @Mr Baseball: Ha!

  34. mike says:

    So does Iowa Cubs follow through?

  35. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:

    I’m sure there’s a photoshopped picture of me in my future.

  36. black love says:

    @elijah where did you read that about webb? i cant find it anywhere on the interenet and im dying to drop him.

  37. JR says:

    @Grey: Sometimes the Padres starters are so transitory that you don’t even need a nickname. But I nominate “Chick Correia”

  38. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Mr Baseball: The George Michael one was awesome.

    @IowaCubs: You’re going to get a Pujols tattoo then Photoshop yourself on the Eiffel Tower?

    @JR: Ha, that’s a great area for a nickname, not sure if Chick Correia is it though. There’s one out there.

  39. I'm Keith Hernandez says:

    Beltran and J Johnson, no brainer for Berkman and Mclouth?

  40. Wizo says:

    Berkman/R Martin for my Sandoval/Scherzer? My pitching is my pitching is dominating

  41. RIP Harry says:

    Better chance at reaching majors this year- Smoak or Strasburg?

  42. AMH says:

    Gotta love the Pink Floyd reference.

  43. vinko says:

    Is Howell an upgrade over Qualls, or are they nearly the same?

  44. @JR: Random Padre pitcher = hodgepadre as in “San Diego is home for a whole week – time to pick up a hodgepadre or two for my fantasy staff.”

  45. Mike D. says:

    @Grey: AL Only 5×5 – Best DH for rest of year?

    Giambi, David Murphy, Mike Sweeney, or Pie

  46. Rick Dempsey says:

    @Grey: What did you make of the Blackburn start? It seems as though his pitch count should top out at 85 or 90 pitches cause he comes undone late in the game.

  47. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:

    What happened to the comment count?

  48. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Rick Dempsey: I’ve talked a lot about Blackburn, if you search the site. Not a big fan. Just not enough Ks.

    @IowaCubs: It was killing my server. Looking into alternatives, but I’m computer stupid and it’s not going to be easy from what I hear.

  49. EJ says:

    @Grey… Yesterday you informed me of the streaming strategy that many owners employ and was used against me last week. What’s the take on what I have just coined “anti-streaming”? Basically I had Oswalt start yesterday and now I obviously have untouchable ERA and WHIP numbers. Also I’m in an 8×8 league, so Losses and CGs are categories. My thought is if i bench starters the rest of the week, I can win those 4 pitching categories, maybe 5 with saves.

    I’m giving up Ks and Wins, but my opponent has 5 two-start pitchers this week, so they are unlikely categories for me to win anyway. Shutouts are the 8th category but that’s useless since it obviously ends in a tie on most occasions. So… is this a good strategy, or a shady tactic?

    Thank you again for your time and help!

  50. Grey

    Grey says:

    @EJ: If there’s no minimum innings/week limit then that’s also a strategy. It’s harder to win that way because you really have to be careful about your ERA and WHIP and if one of your closers blows up on Sunday, he may doom you.

  51. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @EJ: just make sure your league doesn’t have an innings minimum.

    this is why i like weekly lineups, so owners can’t do this if they get in a few starts and have a sub-2.00 era and sub-1.00 whip. personally i play if like a man.

  52. Mike D. says:

    @Grey: Thanks.

    Is Cahill back on your shizz list after last week’s start?

    Debating between Cahill @CLE, Slowey vs. DET, or JP Howell for the last spot this week. I could use a starter in there, but not one who gets beat up, of course…

  53. Greg says:

    Start Correira vs. HOU this week? He seems like a low-risk high-reward option.

  54. AL KOHOLIC says:

    @EJ: man or mouse,bull,play to win,thats not cheating its a stategy but like grey said,one bad rp outing and it backfires

  55. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Mike D.: I’d go with Howell.

    @Greg: I’d start him.

  56. bobbo says:

    @Grey: Thanks for confirming that my suspicion of Beltran vs. A Jones in a keeper is a pretty tough call.

    We keep 5 offensive players at the end of the year (no cap on how long you keep them, but you choose 5 every year). What are your thoughts on who to keep out of (I’ve marked my thoughts with *):

    Mauer*, Rollins*, Wright*, A Jones*, BJ Upton*, Berkman, Beltran, Ibanez, Pence

  57. Commish Cauda (formerly Mike) says:

    *16-team, mixed, H2H-Points League, (HR=4, 3B=3, etc., BB=1, K=-1, SB=3, CS=-1)*

    I am officially sick and tired of Kelly Johnson, (what took me so long, right?). I’m still trying to make a trade, but in the mean time, which one of these craptastic 2B’s should I pick up after I dump his arse?

    Maicer Izturis
    Craig Counsell
    Kaz Matsui
    Brendan Harris
    Brendan Ryan
    Willie Harris
    Willy Aybar


  58. JR says:

    @Rudy Gamble: Dude, you’re a machine! Bravo!

  59. Tom says:

    If Milledge gets dealt to Pirates, do I pick him up in a 12 team mixed league?

  60. AL KOHOLIC says:

    @bobbo: i still like berkman over upton,unless you want steals,plus before those are final id see if wright is going to regain some power,sure the new park hurts but he will also play 81 games in other parks,i think he will pick it up a bit soon

  61. Grey

    Grey says:

    @bobbo: Bit early to make this call, so I’d say Pence may be in over Rollins. Depends what Rollins does in the 2nd half of the year.

    @Commish Cauda (formerly Mike): I’d go with Matsui for now.

  62. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Tom: Depends who you’re dropping for him, but definitely worth a look.

  63. Bob says:

    Yawnstipating, but Ryan Garko or Hank Blalock?

  64. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Bob: Blalock

  65. bobbo says:

    @Grey: Right, I understand it’s early to make the call. However I was in 1st but am now losing ground with Beltran and Ibanez on the DL, Rollins getting benched (actually, maybe this has helped my AVG and OBP), and Jones slumping a bit. Was thinking of trying to move Beltran to a team that’s out of it for someone that could help this year (assuming I wouldn’t be keeping him). Thoughts?

  66. JR says:

    Here is some “scientific” support for Grey’s PETCO homeschooling argument:

    This year, the league is hitting .222/.308/.351 at PETCO.


  67. Corey says:

    Better keeper for the future- Cahill or Butler?

  68. Greg says:

    Do we bench Slowey again this week until he proves he is healthy?

  69. Grey

    Grey says:

    @bobbo: Sure, with caveats. Who are you getting for Beltran?

    @JR: Yeah, doesn’t take a scientist to see Petco is a very large park. Balls die in that outfield. I’ve seen it. Not pretty.

    @Corey: Butler

  70. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Greg: You can in 12 team leagues or shallower. It’s a close call. Hate to, but it’s understandable.

  71. Joe B says:

    Hello Grey… 10 team weekly league… who’s better the rest of the year? F Liriano or G Floyd… I like Liriano’s K potential better, but Floyd has been studly the last month… I have Liriano and Floyd is a free agent… SOS!

  72. EJ says:

    @Grey… Just bought you 2-3 daquiris (depending on cost at your favorite establishment). You’ve been a big help with your columns and answering any questions I’ve had. I’m sure I’ll have plenty more as the season goes on. Thanks a lot! Keep up the phenomenal work!

  73. Grey

    Grey says:

    @I’m Keith Hernandez: That’s great news!

    Isn’t that Oprah’s boyfriend?

    @Joe B: I’d just hold tight if you already own Liriano. It’s a bit of an apples for apples move.

    @Paulie Allnuts: re: Wieters — Yup.

    Whoa, conflicting reports. Keith Hernandez just said he’s going to play.

    I’d hold Porcello in a keeper.

    @EJ: Thanks so much!

  74. Paulie Allnuts

    Paulie Allnuts says:

    @I’m Keith Hernandez: If that’s correct, you scooped my scoop. That would be wonderful news, both for my beloved Mets, and my fantasy squad. It just seems that the second opinion came extremely quickly, before the print could dry in the NY Post.

  75. Doc says:

    Good news on the Beltran front (yeah I’m not always Doc Death!) And why is Carlos getting advice from Oprah’s man?

    from Metsblog

    The second opinion Carlos Beltran received from Dr. Steadman on his knee in Colorado provided a ‘reassuring diagnosis,’ according to Adam Rubin of the Daily News, citing a source familiar with the examination.

    Instead of season-ending surgery, Rubin believes Steadman will recommend Beltran remain inactive through the All-Star break, as a result of a bone bruise.

  76. Doc says:

    Wow, I missed all that. Yes, I do have a job!

  77. Tom says:

    @Grey: Lindstrom Rasmus Hawkins or Stewart, and I REALLY need saves (not that those guys help now)

  78. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Tom: Grab Hawkins.

  79. Tom says:

    that last one refers to my comment about milledge by the way

  80. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Tom: Now I’m confused. Drop one of those for Milledge? Drop Lindstrom.

  81. Joe B says:

    @Grey: G FLoyd or U Jimenez… I have a free pick-up coming to me so i’m not sure who to grab… they have VERY similar stats.

  82. Doc says:

    Matt Lindstrom (elbow) could begin a throwing program by Friday. Lindstrom had his right elbow re-examined Monday by team physicians, who quickly determined that his inflammation has mostly dissipated.

  83. Ashley says:

    Should I drop Iannetta for Olivo?

  84. SRM says:

    @Doc: Wanna share your secrets on breaking news? Is it mostly various Twitter accounts to your PDA or something? I could see how knowing stuff first could backfire, but I’d still hate to have you in my league.

  85. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Joe B: Floyd

    @Doc: Thanks for the heads up!

    @Ashley: Nah

    ********THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS********

  86. Tom says:

    Thanks Grey, yea that was totally confusing, but you answered it. Thanks man.

  87. AL KOHOLIC says:

    @Doc: serriously,if nunez gets a few more smooth saves,i am not so sure lindstrom and his 6.50-1.70 numbers get back to closing,i hope not

  88. brad says:

    @Ashley: I’d hang onto Ianetta, Olivo is hot now, but I think Ianetta will be better in all cats (except avg.) at the end of the year.

  89. roto rooter says:

    Who do you prefer for the rest of the season: Dukes or Reimold?

  90. Scott says:

    @SRM: Those were from They are pretty good.

  91. Doc says:

    @SRM: No PDA, just Twitter and too much time on my hands.

  92. Doc says:

    @AL KOHOLIC: Me Too!

    @Scott: Rotoworld is much slower than Twitter, but still a good source.

  93. SRM says:

    @Scott: Thanks. I do have their little do-hicky widget on my iGoogle homepage, but it seems i always get scooped in my league.

  94. Corey says:

    @ Grey: I’m curious, why Butler over Cahill?

  95. Matt Cain for Robinson Cano, and I’ve got Aaron Hill.

  96. Grey

    Grey says:

    @whiteblackred: You don’t need Cano then. I’d prefer Cain there.

    ********THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS********

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