How about Framber Suarez! I mean, how about Ranger Valdez! Ramber Suadez! Frager Valrez! How about them all? Can you not put your hands together and celebrate good pitching without them being aces? You’re such a try-hard with your, “Ooh, I need aces,” and I’m like, “These guys are good enough for you,” all preseason, […]
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Rogers Ringers Rangers
June 23, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 225 Commentsby: Grey
“Trevor Rogers shoved, bro!” I hear that, and my first thought is, “I do not have a brother for Rogers to shove.” My second thought is, “Why is he shoving people? Does he need anger management? I am legitimately concerned for Trevor Rogers.” My third thought is, “There’s no third thought.” My fourth thought is, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Cincy Suits Psyche Fans With Burns Notice
June 22, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 313 Commentsby: Grey
Chase Burns will be called up for Tuesday. Mr. Burns if you’re nasty or Smithers. Chase if you’re patio furniture or on the show Cops. CB if you’re a terrible ump with the last name Bucknor. Cha-Bu if you’re ordering something in a Korean restaurant and mispronouncing it. He is coming. The 2nd overall pick […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Tend To Brady House Like You’re Ann Buy Davis
June 20, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell, Featured | 243 Commentsby: Grey
I asked ChatGPT this great philosophical question, “If mom says don’t play ball in the house, and when she said it she was in the Brady House, and Brady House plays ball, is he making mom mad?” ChatGPT didn’t say anything in return, but smoke rose from its robot ears and started sputtering. I defeated […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Marlins’ Batters Got Cristophried
June 19, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 218 Commentsby: Grey
Philadelphia Phillies is such a funny name. It’s like the California Calis or the New York Yorkies. How’d that get through 150 years of name changes to get to us? ACKSUALLY, I wonder if it’s because it’s such an old name it’s how it’s here. The name is from 1883, and back then people would […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?This is my mea culpa on Chris Sale (8 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.52). I said to avoid him and I blew it like I was Scott Blewett. Why was Sale left in to throw 116 pitches yesterday? That I don’t know, but my guess is Brian Snitker stopped […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Toglia Shire Tells Rockies They Can’t Lose
June 17, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 231 Commentsby: Grey
Beaten and bruised, the Rockies entered Washington. They just saw their best friend, the great Apollo Creed, die because Bud Black didn’t throw the towel fast enough. Instead, he threw a lineup card with their best hitter in the 9-hole and their 2nd best hitter on the bench, but that’s another story. The odds, as […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Ray-O’s…Ray-O’s…Pepiot 11 Ks And O’s Want To Go Home
June 16, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 280 Commentsby: Grey
Was between Ryan Pepiot (8 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 11 Ks, ERA at 3.11) and Ohtani for the lede and I went with the “eating your vegetables” vs. “dessert as every meal” lede. I mean, which would you have chosen? Dessert? [eyes your waistline] You don’t say. So, Pepiot’s numbers look promising, and the […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?So, I was enjoying my Father’s Day with my dog, Ted. He was tossing me the frisbee, I was catching it in my mouth (in our house, we don’t assign roles). Then it was announced that Rafael Devers was traded to the Giants, and I started rolling on the floor, laughing, and Ted gave me […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Buy Muncy Max II: The Road Warrior
June 13, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell, Featured | 264 Commentsby: Grey
In the year 1225, there was a 700-foot statue of Max Muncy in what is now commonly referred to as Lithuania. The town’s name was Muncy and the statue was named Max. For 800 years, the people of Muncy chipped away at this Max statue. Each rock they chipped off this statue, they named a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Rangers bend Ober and brutalized him (4 2/3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 4.40). The once-every-six-weeks trouncing? The every-month-and-a-half frog-marching? The every 45th-day scrub-stomping? Sucks, man! It is very not good at all! Kinda hard to work up a general sense of appeasement when your fantasy team’s being Abu Ghraib’d until it confesses war crimes, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Steve Cohen Rejoices As Nats Bats Make A Star Of David
June 11, 2025 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 262 Commentsby: Grey
“Now, taking the stage, at the Pitching Coach Pulitzers for 2025, we have Jeremy Hefner of the New York Metropolitans and ‘Whoever the pitching coach is for the Royals my Google stopped working in early February when they started rolling out their AI product.’ Let’s see who the winner is…Wow, it’s all of us for […]
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