Jimmy Rollins hits the DL. So there goes one of your top two picks. Yeah, that’s no fun. If you didn’t draft him, you’re smiling pretty wide today. Not because one of your leaguemates is suffering (okay, maybe that’s part of the fun). No, you’re smiling because you’re anticipating what I’m about to tell you. There may not be a better buying opportunity on Rollins the entire season. Buy now! Trade for Rollins. Get him. Swindle, people. Don’t wait a week until he’s about to come back. Don’t trade Hanley Ramirez for him; that’s just dopey. No, buy low on Rollins. Know that the ankle injury may linger for a little while, but it’s only April. If you can trade for Rollins offering some package that would have never worked two weeks ago, then you’re still getting a premiere shortstop who will be hitting in front of Utley and Howard all season. In the beginning of the season I had Rollins’s projections at 130/22/70/35/.290, I’d scale that to 110/18/55/22/.290 — so, I guess the question to you is, how much do you want those numbers? If you drafted Alex Rodriguez, you’re not getting much sleep tonight. Arod injured his right quad in Sunday’s game. Arod has a lot of positives going for him, durability is one. I think he’ll be just fine. Sit tight.

Frank Thomas - Hater Bell pointed out how Karabell was a part-mental patient, part-Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer when he called Frank Thomas a big 2008 sleeper. Yeah, it didn’t make any sense in March and still doesn’t, but whatever he’s ESPN’s top analyst, ya’ll.

Mark Lowe - I hope you’re not even bothering with this mess anymore. Putz should be back this Tuesday. Don’t bother with the fill-ins.

Rafael Soriano - He still can’t throw without pain. I think he might be out a month at least. Plan accordingly.

Chipper Jones - I should’ve had WebMd sponsor today’s post. Of course he’s hurt. The guy gets hurt on a base on balls. You know that though.

Edwin Encarnacion - (His last name’s spelling is bothering me. Second “a” or no second “a.” If anyone can get a message to Edwin and ask him, mucho gracias en advancemiento.) Hit two home runs on Sunday. I have him on a lot of teams. I hope this is the beginnings of a hot streak.

Carlos Ruiz - Or as he will now be known, Chuck Ruiz. As in chuck him to the waiver wire. Go Doumit, Mathis, Napoli, etc. It’s three weeks; Chuck Ruiz is being abandoned on my teams. He’ll be on the waiver wire, we can go back later if he starts to hit.

Adam Dunn - If anyone’s worried he’s going to hit under .200 for the season, I’d trade for him in a second.

Scott Baker - Going into the season, I pointed out to all of youse in 143.2 innings his K/BB was 102/29. So far this year, it’s 20/4. That’s really good.

Jonathan Sanchez - He strikes people out and in his next start he gets the Reds in SF. Yeah, he should be on your team for at least Friday’s start.

Eric Gagne - Fatty-No-Roids got hit. He was used four straight days, so it’s not anymore of a harbinger than the whole injury-prone thing. The Brewers really, really want him to succeed, so know that as Riske sits on your staff.

Chase Utley - My pick for NL MVP is looking good thus far. Not many of my other picks look so great. BTW, if you haven’t entered that contest yet, there’s still time.

Jair Jurrjens - I’m assuming after all of the times I’ve mentioned Jurrjens, you’ve already picked him up. If you haven’t, you should. Even when he lost this year, he looked good.

Milton Bradley - He hit a home run off Wakefield today. Whatever, just yesterday he was sitting with a sore knee.

Paul Konerko - He was actually dropped in one of my ‘pert leagues. I don’t understand that. It’s still very early in the season. I’m going to try and get him off of waivers, but since all the other ‘perts read this, I probably won’t get him. So why say anything? If you have him, bench him, but don’t drop him. It’s still early.

The first week of fantasy baseball is in the books. More than likely you have at least one team that absolutely sucks. Started the year looking like Beth from The Real World, pre- and post-plastic surgery. I know I do. Well, the fantasy baseball season’s not over yet. Miguel Cabrera’s not going to end the season hitting under .150. So let’s cull some stuff so we can mull some stuff, shall we?

Xavier Nady - Honestly, never thought I’d ever mention him on the blog, but he’s starting the season on fire. Could he keep it going? What, am I Ms. Cleo? I don’t know for sure, but history tells us no. This won’t continue. Know what you can’t do? Let him sit on the waiver wire. Don’t drop Carlos Lee for him, but every year some players come out of nowhere. Maybe this is Nady’s year. I know when I grabbed Beltre after he hit four homers in the first week of ‘04, leaguemates laughed at me (I believe Rudy Gamble is included in the list). Yeah, I won that league. You just never know some times. Chad Qualls is swell and all, but you can drop him and take a flier on Nady. He could be this year’s Carlos Pena.

Jason Kendall - He is a .300 hitter. The problem is he has the power of a twelve-year-old girl. Continue to ignore.

Derrek Lee - I pointed out four months ago, “Post-All-Star break in ’07, he hit 16 of his 22 homers. Watch this trend continue into ‘08.”  I don’t think this is going to stop.

Frank Thomas - He could lead the league in homers. I say he falls twenty short. There’s a reason the warranty expires after 100,000 miles.

Yunel Escobar - He’s doing everything right. There’s no reason why he can’t be a young Renteria. (That’s actually not a knock, even if it sounds like one.)

Jayson Nix - Atrocious is being kind for how he’s looked at the plate. Iceberg right ahead!

Manny Ramirez - All them Sons of Sam Horn were slapping fives high saying, “Manny’s back,” after the four RBI March 25th game. Well, he’ll still be okay, but Don’t Believe the SOSH Hype Machine.

Jake Peavy - I told you he was as good as Santana and his division’s hitting is Triple AAAish.

Edinson Volquez and Johnny Cueto - Their weeks won’t always be as good as this one, but they obviously have the stuff. Let’s hope the league doesn’t catch up to them too fast. I’ll probably tell you to trade them in June, but we have time before we have that travail.

Brian Bannister - Not sure he could strikeout Mark Reynolds, but the Royals aren’t a 100 lose team anymore. He’s not going to be exciting, unless 15 wins with a 3.75 ERA excites you. There’s a place for that.

Every Superstar that went 3 for 25 and knocked in 1 run - They’ll get better or, at least, we have to give them a chance to get better. Call off the firing squad for now.

Ben Sheets - Maybe I didn’t say this aloud to all of youse, but the guy can easily win the Cy Young. Health is the issue. His talent is fo realz.

Justin Germano - He pitches half of his games in Petco. If you can’t see there’s NL-only value in that, I can’t help you. In mixed leagues, I’m watching him very closely. Weirder things have happened than a Padres pitcher being good in Petco.

Kason Gabbard - Not interested. I’ll let someone else grab this schmohawk.

Trevor Hoffman - He is old, but he’d have to sexually harass Bud Black’s wife to be removed as the closer.

James Shields - I told you he was a better draft choice than Kazmir. I see no reason why he can’t give you top twenty starter worth.

David Murphy - Doesn’t know how to take a walk and very light hitting. Eh, this was just a good start.

Krispie Young - He has power and speed and he’s currently batting .217. Of course he is. That’s how Krispie do.

Justin Verlander - Um, he’s not starting the year off too well. It’s still early.

Kyle Lohse - He’s 29. Don’t think he suddenly turned the corner into Worthwhile-ville. Twins don’t trade away good pitching prospects; they acquire them.

Joakim Soria - He could save 40 games.

Brandon Lyon - He may not save another game this season.

Mark Lowe - Way to run with the job, dude!

Okay, let’s hear some people you’re giddy about even if you know their pace can’t maintain, but you sure hope it does.

These are the players you want to drop, add or simply hold onto for your fantasy baseball roster.

DROPS

Every Baltimore Oriole not named Nick Markakis, Ramon Hernandez or Brian Roberts - This team looks atrocious. Millar’s best is behind him, and he was never that good, shortstop is a black hole, Mora is mediocre and will get injured soon, forget Adam Jones for now, I don’t even like Luke Scott anymore as a deep sleeper.

Ronny Paulino - Doumit looks to be getting the starts against righties. Overall, there’s mostly righties. Look elsewhere.

ADDS

Mark Lowe - Second in line (presumably) Sean Green (not the Jew that retired) then Eric O’Flaherty. Then again, Miguel Batista got the save the other night, so, ya know, don’t invest too heavily.

Jair Jurrjens - He’s still very raw, but I liked what I’ve seen so far. I would take a flier, if there’s room.

Brian Bannister - The other day, when asked about Bannister, I said he was like last year’s Maddux. I stand by that. There is a place for that on certain teams.

Ryan Church – The Mets are outfield poor. In deep leagues, you have to take a look because of the lineup he’s in.

Angel Pagan - Speaking of the Mets, and speaking of deep leagues, NL-onlyers take a look. He’ll be in left until Alou returns.

Joey Gathright - Bourn, Carlos Gomez have to make room — more cheap steals.

Blake DeWitt - In very deep leagues, keep it in the back of your mind that DeWitt was considered the best hitter in the 2004 draft.

Franklin Gutierrez, Billy Butler, Andre Ethier, Melky Cabrera, Nate McLouth, Lastings Milledge - There’s been a lot of discussion on this site about these six fifth outfielders. So with Rudy Gamble’s permission, I’m just going to reprint what he had to say in the comments of this post.

Billy Butler - Best average and RBI of the bunch. Got valuable experience last year. And 1B potential. Only downside vs. the rest is no speed.

Nate McLouth - Best SB and Run potential of the bunch. Enough pop for 15 HR. Enough speed for 30 SB. AVG won’t be great.

Lastings Milledge - Most upside of the group but I’m just not sold on any part of his game. Not a good base stealer. No minor league history of plus power.

Melky Cabrera - By no means a great player but he’s young, has 2 years experience, playing for a running manager in a great lineup, and w/ more job security than the guys below him on this list. I think he ends up 75/15/75/15 with a respectably .280 average.

Franklin Gutierrez - No plus power or speed in his minor league history. I think he may fall short of Melky in all 5 categories. Might have playing time cut into. Grey’s note: I don’t see his playing time cut and I like FraGu’s (<—forced nickname!) promise. I see 70/20/80/.270/20. And maybe someone in the Indians’ brass has been reading Razzball, because Gutierrez moved up to the sixth spot the last two days. Just sayin’.

Andre Ethier - His stats for the past two years are just bleh. 15 HR power and no speed. Probably second to Butler on projected AVG. And there’s no doubt Pierre reclaims his job if Ethier slumps.

Scott Hairston - That’s right, I’m adding another name into the six fifth-outfielder-mix. Hairston never got a fair shake in the desert, but he’s got good pop.

Jose Lopez - If you have an erection for longer than four hours after you pick up Lopez, you should go see a doctor. But he’s hitting number two on the Mariners. So, well, there’s that. Honestly, he’s young and he’s started off hot.

HOLDS

Pedro Martinez – He’s going on the DL for 4-6 weeks. I think it’s probably going to end up closer to 6 weeks because of his age. Then he’ll have to rehab. I could see dropping him, if you have someone already filling your DL slot, but I’m going to hold onto Pedro for now.

Juan Pierre - You drafted him for steals. He’s still going to end up with thirty to forty. The Pierre Situation with Ethier hasn’t been decided yet. You need to hold pat. There’s still 25 more weeks in the season. Chill, people.

Tom Gordon - I hate him with great fervor, but we need to see Lidge come back and be healthy before he moves to a “Drop.”

Major league closers are constantly changing and there’s always being discussed. So let’s do that. WTF, Putz is injured? Who’s backing up Gagne? Who’s setting up Huston Street? Who is Jason Grilli? Chad Cordero is injured and Rauch is closing, not or yacht? And do I need to know any of these things? Yes, no, no, yes, no and yes. So here’s a look at the closers that need to be watched for this week.

JJ Putz is injured and I tried to warn people against taking the first closer off the board (or even a top closer). Putz seemed to pull something (ribcage, if you must know). Mark Lowe’s now closing for the Mariners. This might get worse before Putz gets better, so look to Sean Green (not the Jew that retired) or Eric O’Flaherty in case Lowe falters.

Eric Gagne’s on his way out. He was ‘roided and now, as Thing 1 and Thing 2 from Flavor of Love would say, he has been exposed. As I said in the comments on this post, “I just choose between the three (Mota, Riske, Turnbow) in one ten team league and I went with Riske. Seems to be the safest even if he’s not the one called. It’s tough though because Riske is probably the best, Turnbow’s got the longest history there and they’ve seen him close before (though it was scary at times) and Mota’s supposedly the set-up man. We’ll see what cream of the crap rises up. My guess for saves would be Turnbow, Riske then Mota, but I couldn’t afford the Turnbow WHIP hit in the league I picked him up.” Hey, I’ve been quoted! I am an expert! Riske was nasty to the Cubs yesterday. I think you have to grab him. But I still wouldn’t be surprised to see Mota or Turnbow grab some saves. You must monitor Gagne. He’s a timebomb.

Brandon Lyon was lights out the other night against the Reds. The Reds strikeout more than that kid from “The Last American Virgin” who drove the girl for an abortion then was dumped. I have Brandon Lyon on one team and I’m hoping Tony Pena is dropped so I can handcuff him.

Chad Cordero handing off the closer duties to Jon Rauch…. For one game, supposedly. Chad Cordero’s a heffin’ liar. Cordero is going on the DL. Today? Tomorrow? Next week? I don’t know, but it’s happening. If you order a “stiff shoulder,” you lose the closing job for a period of time.  I’m doubtful Rauch is available in any of your leagues, and, if he is, I don’t think your league is very competitive.

Huston Street looks like a man that is going to lose his job. I saw it happen with Valverde one year. Happened to Fuentes last year. My gut says Street is going to be figuring things out in the 6th inning soon. With that said, do you really want to pick up Alan Embree, Keith Foulke or Joey Devine? Well, Alan Embree was figuring things out in the 6th inning yesterday and gave up a home run to Ortiz. Keith Foulke will never be on one of my teams. Devine? He’s yet to proven himself in the majors. With the A’s being dreadful this year, you might have to avoid this whole mess.

Matt Capps and Damaso Marte both got hit the other day, but I think Capps has great job security. So why mention him? Capps was walking hitters (something he rarely did last year) the other night. I think Capps would have to be injured to lose this job. Walks could be a sign that he’s hiding an injury. Hopefully, he’s not.

Kerry Wood is the closer while Carlos Marmol is the setup man. Kerry Wood looked like crap. Marmol cruised through four hitters, striking out three. To be continued.

CJ Wilson hasn’t had any problems yet this year. I still see ‘perts grabbing Kazuo Fukumori and Joaquin Benoit. As of right now, I see no reason to handcuff Wilson.

Tom Gordon is being dropped in some leagues of mine. I wouldn’t do this just yet, because of Lidge’s uncertainty, but I would put Gordon on my bench until further notice.