Chris Archer | RHP (SP) | Tampa Bay Rays | D.o.B: 9/26/88 | 6’3″ | 180 lbs | B/T: R/R | Rd. 5, 2006 (HS) | CHC #1 ranked prospects per Baseball America (pre-Matt Garza trade) | MiLB Player Page
Archer was the larger name that came over in the Matt Garza trade (prospect mavens will note that Huk-Ju Lee was the prized piece). Please, blog, may I have some more?
Kevin Gregg was handed his 6th blown save yesterday. He’s tizzerrible. I won’t defend him. Your honor, no questions at this time. I just don’t see the Orioles bothering to switch things up. They’re defeated. Look into their eyes and you see the shadow of Cal Ripken Jr. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Brett Cecil – Cecil grew up right where I live and pitched for my high school’s big rival: Dematha (a school that produced David Aldridge, Keith Bogans, Mike Brey, James Brown, Adrian Dantley, Joe Forte, Paul Rabil, Brian Westbrook and others). Please, blog, may I have some more?
With Nelson Cruz hitting the DL (I’ll get to that schmohawk), the Rangers called up Leonys Martin. Martin could be a poor man’s Desmond Jennings, in other words he’ll be a 2nd ballot Hall of Famer, not 1st. Martin has breezed through the minor leagues, starting in the Rookie league, jumping to Double-A and finally hitting Triple-A. It’s called the “Julio Borbon-Endy Chavez-David Murphy Ain’t Doing Shizz From Shinola So We Need A Centerfielder” plan. Martin has plus-plus speed. Red Bull says Leonys gives them wings. He could develop some power down the road, but I wouldn’t expect more than a homer or two with this call-up. If you need speed in AL-Only or deeper keeper (hey, poet!) mixed leagues, I’d look at him. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Nelson Cruz – Will be out for 3 weeks with his moans over his hammy. Any Nostradumbass could’ve told you he’d be hurt at some point this year, but, seriously, this guy gets injured at least once every two months. Let him play the field in a bubble. He’s now getting a platelet-rich plasma injection to stimulant the healing process. I think this was the same treatment they gave Caesar in Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Master Standings are here. Fantasy Razzball Standing are here. Here’s the update:
Random ItalicizedVoice (RCL 5) bounced up and down during the week, but finished where they started – in first with 117 points. The lead dropped to 3, though, as Better Lucky Than Good (Partially Torn RCL) raised their total from 112 to 114. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yo, Meteorologist Grey here and I’m standing in Chesapeake Bay to show you how high the water has risen. It’s usually up to my waist, but, as you can see, the water is now up to my shoulders. Would I normally be standing in Chesapeake Bay if there was no hurricane? No, this is for ratings, snitches! That was it, that was the big news all across the world of baseball this weekend. How there wasn’t any on the eastern seaboard. ‘See, bored?’ is more like it. But there was Justin Verlander winning his 20th game, and locking up the Cy Young. His line so far 20-5/2.38/0.90/218 in 215 2/3 IP. Those numbers are sick as in very healthy not sick as in sick. When you have over 200 innings and more than a K per inning, you deserve the accolades, which only sounds like something you take for an upset stomach. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Jimmy Rollins – Won’t return when eligible, i.e., the Phils are coasting into the playoffs and don’t care if any of their regulars play the entire month of September. Just a friendly reminder that you need to have back-up plans in place if your H2H team is riding Phils like Marlo Thomas. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Milwaukee Brewers promoted the 24-year-old, unranked third baseman Taylor Green. Has a solid swing, controls strike zone and make consistent sound contact, power is average at best. Defensively is where he stands out, showing above-average skill. This year at Triple-A (Pacific Coast League) he has a dominant slash line .336/.413/.583 in 420 at-bats with 59 XBH (22 Hr) and a 72:55 K:BB ratio. Please, blog, may I have some more?
I started writing this week and kept getting distracted by the notion of a “tease” starting pitcher. These are guys we all see available every week at the top of our waiver wire. For some reason they hop on and off rosters, faster than the Easter Bunny. They all for some reason have an attractive quality, whether it be a great matchup, a previous decent start or just a general boyish quality that we find irresistible. We see the numbers they produce and sometimes numbers tell a different story than what really is going on for fantasy purposes. In the end, it comes down to picking a starting pitcher in a must win week is the same place that $30 steak goes to digest. So with the eve of playoffs upon us, here are the lower end 2 start options for the week. Good luck and happy fantasying. Please, blog, may I have some more?
This will be the last time I mention Logan Morrison for some time. Hashtag that. Not that I don’t like him, it’s just I’ve given him enough press, assuming the word ‘press’ still makes sense even though I’m dictating this post to a Montessori-taught monkey that I’ll occasionally catch looking at me like he wants to kill me and take over Razzball, which makes dictating that even more awkward. Imagine in 300 years when they find this post in a time capsule with Snooki’s poof. They’ll read that monkey sentence and think they’ve figured out the major problem with our society was we had monkeys taking dictation only to be disappointed when they read this sentence. Sorry, future reader! We’re more complicated than that! Whoa, that was a major sidetrack. So Morrison was sent down because he needed to “work on all aspects of being a Major Leaguer,” which basically meant he used to grab his farts and throw them at Hanley. If someone dropped Morrison when he was demoted, I’d go ahead and re-add him. Or have your monkey re-add him for you. I’m kidding, future reader, our monkeys don’t manage our fantasy teams. They only give advice which we decide whether or not to follow. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Kyle Seager – The other day I compared him to Omar Infante. I’ll see that comparison and raise him Martin Prado. Personally, I don’t like guys like Infante or Prado outside of NL-Only leagues, but I also don’t like people who write personally either, so there’s that. I’m a contradiction wrapped inside of lazy writing pitfalls. Please, blog, may I have some more?
You know what they call three 4-baggers in New York? An A-Rod post-game party. It’s a good thing Clorox is headquartered in Oakland because Billy Beane is going to want to rinse his eyes with bleach after this game. Russell Martin went 5-for-5, 3 runs, 6 RBIs and 2 homers (one grand slam), Grandy hit a grannie going 2-for-4, 4 runs, 5 RBIs and Cano added in one of his own with 5 RBIs. A video of this game should be shown next time the issue of a salary cap comes up at the Winter Meetings. Russell Martin has 17 homers on the year. Even if all of them were Pesci Pole assisted, it would still be a solid year. Then throw in 8 steals and decent runs and RBIs, and it’s no wonder Alyssa Milano fields his fly balls. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jim Thome – Luckily, he got to enjoy his 600th home run on the Twins. What an event! Was like Geraldo Rivera finding a second bottle of whiskey. Thome continues his ride on the casino bus to the Indians. How appropriate. To continue the gambling comparison, right now the Indians are like the guy at the ATM taking out money he doesn’t have to double down on the Pass Line at a cold craps table. Hey, Indians, it was a good run, but you’re throwing good money after bad. Go grab a $9.99 steak dinner and bark obscenities at tourists. You’re not making the playoffs anymore. Thome’s not changing that. As for fantasy, Thome gives the occasional homer, not much else. Um, okay. Please, blog, may I have some more?