Ayo whaddup, it’s ya boy Grey Albright aka the Fantasy Master Lothario aka White Chocolate aka The Ladder You Use To Reach New Heights aka The God Particle aka Trump’s Supreme Court Nominee Judge Reinhold aka Paid Overtime aka Close Parking Spot When You’re In A Rush aka Al Swearengen’s Swearing Dictionary aka Teacher, We Don’t Need No Education aka The Weird Guy That Latches Onto The Main Character In Oscar Films I Think His Name Is Paul Dano aka The Butcher, The Baker and The Candlestick Maker aka The Stinging On Your Pinkie Toe When You Clip Too Close aka Paul Anka aka Forget How To Spell My Name And Just Get Me My Coffee! I just spent thirty minutes looking up Mindy Cohn and whether or not she’s a lesbian. Ah, the offseason. You are a soothing mistress that touches my naughty bits with idle hands. She’s apparently not a lesbian, but a confirmed friend of the gays, and she wanted to lose weight in the 80’s, but the producers asked her to avoid it for the character of Natalie. They finally agreed to let her wear baggy clothes. No comment, except the “no comment” comment has the weight of a thousand eye rolls. A quick preamble about the 2017 fantasy baseball rookie series that is coming from me over the next few weeks. Rookies could get a post if they meet MLB eligibility requirements, less than 130 ABs or 50 IP. That means no Greg Bird, no Orlando Arcia, no Alex Bregman, and finally no Joey Gallo. In 2012, the first player I highlighted was Mike Trout. That wasn’t an accident. I said in the Mike Trout post, “He’s ranked number one for me. Numero uno. The Big Mahoff. He’s the big Statue of Liberty in New York, not that girly one in Paris!” Since then, I’ve attempted to make the first rookie post about a prospect that will be the top rookie for fantasy the following year. Last year, that honor went to Corey Seager. Yes, it’s an honor, don’t be so condescending. This year the top fantasy prospect isn’t no ordinary man, this is the prospect I be seeing in my sleep. Yoan Moncada will be your number one 2017 fantasy baseball rookie. Will Moncada be named to the All-Century Team in 85 years or edged out by a robot with grabby hands named the Hitter-Tron that my great-great-nephew will sue due to trademark infringement only to find out it’s the same Hitter-Tron that once graced this little fantasy baseball blog called Razzball? Can Moncada be a top five 3rd basemen in 2017? So many questions and so little time to look up Mindy Cohn info! Anyway, what can we expect of Yoan Moncada for 2017 fantasy baseball?
In his first 123 major league at-bats, he hit .220. He didn’t hit .220, he hit the snooze button and went back to sleep! Wait, he really didn’t hit .220. That’s not Moncada, that’s Trout. In Mike Trout’s first 123 at-bats he hit .220. Okay, I’m not saying Moncada is Trout and vice versa. By the by, someone Googling Judge Reinhold and Vice Versa just joined us. Show them some hospitality! Mentioning Trout’s first 123 at-bats were meant to act as a cushion against the stunods that were about to drop some, “Moncada wasn’t good in his first taste of the majors this year.” Dip a soft pretzel in some warm water and sprinkle salt on it to form the word ‘logic’ because yours is twisted. I’ll admit to be far more wary — farawary? — of Moncada after he looked like his bat should on a milk carton after two weeks in the majors. The farawary seeds of doubt have been planted? Sure, but like a self-help guru would tell you, I think we need to ignore those little evil doubters whispering their negativity in your ear. We learned nothing from Moncada’s 19 major league at-bats and learned more from his minor league games. He is an explosive power/speed guy, hashtag beastmode, who looks like a perennial All-Star in the making. Moncada looks about as can’t miss as Spin Doctors’ Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong even if his career looks like the Spin Doctors’ in reverse with the valley coming early. A guy that can hit 20+ HRs and steal 30+ bases should get your under-nethers tingly. This past year in the minors he had 16 HRs and 45 SBs as a barely only 21-year-old. That’s really the only problem I see from him. He’s young. If he’s really 21 and not a Latin 21 and really 25, then he might not break out until next season. I have no use for that in redrafts, and that’s what this is all about, but if I were to put on my keeper hat for a brief moment, yeah, Moncada’s the bomb dot gov. My other issue is his contact tendencies in the minors. He had a 30.9% strikeout percentage in Double-A. In the majors, that would be a 99.9% rate and he’d hit .001 (math might be off there), but he is young so he can get better with pitch recognition. Do I have as much confidence with Moncada as I did with Seager last year? I don’t, but, for this year, I’m going to be optimistic and say he gets the 3B job out of spring training and give him the stats of 77/12/79/.247/27 in 504 ABs with big upside from there. Think as high as .300+ with another ten homers and steals. Yeah, I’m spoonering Moan big time.